Omg, I loved your Big Blonde Headcanons, and was wondering if I could get some general headcanons for Zeke Jaeger too š„°
Monkey Man
Random Zeke Jaeger Headcannons
I'm glad you enjoyed the Big Blonde Boys! And I'm sooooooo glad you asked for Zeke! I have a weird fascination over this asshole asdfghjkl
Big Blonde Boys (Erwin, Miche, and Reiner Headcannons)
Maria's Scribblings MASTERLIST
Zeke Jaeger
Ā· Zeke has always been one of those boys in school that seemingly every girl has a crush on, yet wonāt seem to date any of them. Or anyone, for that matter.
Ā· His grandparents are secretly waiting for Zeke to finally find a wife and get married.
Ā· He would never admit it, but Zeke unironically enjoys pumpkin spice latte.
Ā· The War Chief is clearly as brilliant as can be, and his love for reading shows that. His favorite author is known to be Leo Tolstoy, having already read War and Peace and Anna Karenina several times now. I wonāt be surprised if he was reading Tolstoy when he attacked Levi in the Forest of Giants Trees.
Ā· Remember that stuffed monkey he used to play with? Zeke named that monkey āWild Thing!ā This was because his favorite book as child was Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak.
Ā· Growing up, Zeke has always wished he had a baby sibling.
Ā· Heās tried to learn how to play the violin at the insistence of his grandmother as a kid. But Zeke wasnāt very patient with learning the skill, and so never got past the basics.
Ā· He secretly gets a kick out of reading all the hogwash and conspiracy theories the Marleyan tabloids would write about him and the Marleyan Militaryās leadership.
Ā· In fact, the tabloids are weirdly over-interested in Zeke Jaegerās love life. Nearly every week, thereās new gossip over a new āJaeger Girl.ā Many speculations have been made over the years. Including Zeke being gay, and/or that he was in an affair with Pieck and/or that he had degenerate tendencies.
Ā· Zeke is an avid lover of music. It helps him retreat into the bubble of his mind, and allow him to think. As War Chief, his aide-de-camps have been known to say that once he starts playing Chet Baker in his office, you best believe that Zeke Jaeger's cooking up quite the strategy.
Ā· He likely found a love for jazz from his grandparents. So much so, that heās always said that Ella Fitzgerald is the greatest singer to walk the earth.
Ā· At the same time, heāll never pass up some good olā classic rock nā roll! Zeke strongly believes that The Beatles will never go out of style, and loves to blast Sgt. Pepperās Lonely Hearts Club Band in his car when heās out driving.
Ā· Youād never believe me, but Zeke Jaeger has a talent for the arts! It was something Grisha often admonished him for, constantly drilling into his head that he should busy himself with āmatters of consequenceā instead.
Ā· But yes, Zeke has a knack for wood working, and have created several pieces of wooden furniture for his grandparents now.
Ā· Once, Porco accidentally stumbled upon Zekeās collection of charcoal sketches. His subjects were often the flora and fauna of downtown Liberio; canaries, poppies, cats, dandelions, etc. Porco never had the guts to ask about the sketches, but itās probably some form of therapy for the War Chief because god knows he needs one.
Ā· Zeke is a nitpicky asshole when it comes to alcohol. On that aspect, he has very refined tastes. Heās been known to serve his own personally brewed craft beer to his fellow warriors during their meetings-turned-shitstorm. I say this, because Colt absolutely loves whatever sorcery Zeke does to his beer, and gets a little too enthusiastic when drinking.
(Everybody except Colt knows this, but Zeke secretly tries to brew his beer a little bit stronger each time, just to see how far Coltās drunken bullshit can go. Is Zeke a bastard? Yes. Is he having the time of his life? Fuck yes.)
Ā· Zeke was once invited to throw first pitch at the Marleyan Major Baseball League Championships once. Despite being Eldian, for a while, the Marleyan press called him āChief Perfect Pitch.ā
Ā· Zekeās favorite movie genre has always been espionage. And his love for James Bond as a teenager definitely taught him how to conduct himself as a sophisticated albeit arrogant gentleman.
Ā· He has cried in a movie though. Which movie? August Rush.
Ā· Zeke likely smells like cigarette smoke and coffee, and prefers earthy scents for his cologne.
Ā· His favorite color is maroon.
Ā· When Zekeās drunkāand itās VERY rare that he isāZeke breaks out the dance moves. Think Magic Mike meets the Jabbawockeez.
Ā· His grandmother once tried setting him up on a date. The evening ended with the poor girl sobbing out that Zekeās one cold, emotionless, rock. Safe to say, it didnāt work out.
Ā· Zeke likes to go boxing when heās angry. Much more so, late at night, where he can make as much noise as he wantsāscreaming and grunting out obscenities at the punching bag.
Ā· No one really knows whether or not Zekeās ever slept with a woman. No oneās ever seen him at a brothel either. Porco once joked that the War Chief probably goes out boxing so much at night because heās āgotta find some way to deal with his boners.ā
Pieck smacked him up the head for that.
Ā· Zeke has really, really crappy handwriting. I mean, he does come from a family of doctors.
Ā· Zeke actually has quite the good instinct for stocks and investing! Somehow, he has good understanding of financial trends. Heād probably be a business man if he wasnāt a Warrior.
Ā· Audrey Hepburn and Snow White were his childhood crushes. If anything, that gives you an idea as to whatās Zekeās type in a girl is-- a factoid which tabloids have used to connect him to Pieck.
Ā· Heās also known to slack off on his paperwork. A lot. Instead, he opts to just pass the work on to whichever new aide has a crush on him. He never feels bad for it, because the young aides never say no anyways.
Ā· And finally, Zeke gets really chapped lips, and often uses a colorless lip balm. All Cherry flavored. How do we know this? His aide-de-camp wonāt say.
Here is a brief description of what each function is like as an inferior. Ā Your dominant function may be so second nature to you that you do not even notice it, so trying to identify your inferior may help you find your type.
Inferior Fe: Iām not good at dealing with other peopleās feelings. Ā I can have emotional explosions when under extreme stress. Ā I donāt mind offending someone with the truth, but I feel uncomfortable when my relationships are in turmoil.
Inferior Fi: When under extreme stress, I can be overwhelmed with emotions that I donāt know how to handle. Ā I lose my drive and feel listless. Ā I donāt always pay attention to where Iām trying to go because Iām trying so hard to get things done.
Inferior Te: I procrastinate and have a hard time finishing things. Ā Iām really disorganized, but sometimes I get stressed and want to put things in order. Ā I tend to snap at people and become harsh under pressure.
Inferior Ti: I like to understand why people do the things they do. Ā People doing things that donāt make sense to me is so frustrating. Ā I can feel like Iām goingĀ around and around in circles trying to figure something out when IāmĀ under stress.
Inferior Ne: I like to feel secure. Ā Stress causes me to start thinking about things that could go wrong, and I get overwhelmed and worry. Ā Sometimes I need a push to get me to do things because Iām focusing on worst-case scenarios.
Inferior Ni: I like to enjoy my life and not worry too much about the future. Ā When I get really stressed out though, the future seems bleak and unchangeable. Ā I can start to worry about something that might never even happen, but it feels inevitable at the time.
Inferior Se: Iām not good at making fast decisions and like to have time to think. Ā I try not to overindulge. Ā Try being the key word. Ā I have a weakness for junk food, and sometimes I watch four seasons of a TV show in three days.
Inferior Si: Iām usually not very good with details, but when Iām under a lot of stress I focus on them. Ā I get so picky and want to do everything just right.
By developing our inferior functions, we can free ourselves from black and white thinking and genuinely grow and develop as individuals. (But Iāve heard not everyone likes that.:))
This post succinctly points out underdeveloped versus developed inferior functions.Ā
āUnderdeveloped (cognitive function)ā sections focus on defensive use of dominant function against inferior function.Ā
āIntegration of (cognitive function)ā sections focus on how dominant function looks like when it no longer resists but listens to the advice given by the inferior function.
***
Inferior Ne (ISTJ, ISFJ):
Underdeveloped Ne, overextended use of Si:Ā
Aversion to novelty: I have difficulty improving my life because I do not pay enough mind to envisioning how I can do things differently and acting upon good ideas for progress.
Driving insecurity: I am insecure and fuss over rules/details because I fear overlooking anything that might unexpectedly destabilize me or expose my insecurities.
Destructive Si expression: I believe I am defined by the worst of my past mistakes/experiences and resign myself to being that.
Integration of Ne:
Openness to new developments: my hard-won expertise can handle most situations and I welcome new challenges as a chance to add to my knowledge base.
Inferior Si (ENTP, ENFP):
Underdeveloped Si, overextended use of Ne:
Aversion to convention: I have difficulty learning well because I do not pay enough mind to observing important details, rules, procedures, conventions, or good advice.
Driving insecurity: I am insecure and erratic because fear of boredom/smallness drives me to make careless, unhealthy, and/or impractical decisions.
Destructive Ne expression: I use my imagination to weasel out of work and responsibility, thus sabotaging my own growth and happiness.
Integration of Si:
Openness to careful developments and acceptance of sensible reality constraints: Though I think big, I can still carry out my good ideas and achieve satisfying progress because I think of creative ways to work within and around my constraints.Ā
Inferior Se (INTJ, INFJ):
Underdeveloped Se, overextended use of Ni:
Aversion to the ever-changing: I have difficulty seeing value in, appreciating and adapting to the constant flux of life because merely reacting to daily corporeal demands amounts to an unsatisfying and meaningless existence.
Driving insecurity: I am insecure and evasive because I fear not living up to imagined ideals and being confronted with my own confusion, nothingness, or imperfections.
Destructive Ni expression: I superimpose my beliefs/ideas onto the world because I do not require any evidence to know that my gut feelings are fundamental truths.
Integration of Se:
Openness to interesting opportunities and firsthand experiences: I always make the most of what comes my way because I appreciate that time is limited and good opportunities are rare and should not be wasted.
Inferior Ni (ESTP, ESFP):
Underdeveloped Ni, overextended use of Se:
Aversion to careful thought: I have difficulty making wise decisions because I do not pay enough mind to clarifying my thoughts and caring for a positive vision of my future self.
Driving insecurity: I am insecure and hasty because fear of missing out or fear of being blindsided drives me to make rash and/or reckless decisions.Ā
Destructive Se expression: I do whatever feels good in the moment, consequences be damned.
Integration of Ni:
Openness to exploring implications and abstract meaning of events: I live my best life because I prioritize well, set meaningful long term goals, and possess the necessary focus for gradually working towards my aspirations.
Inferior Te (ISFP, INFP):
Underdeveloped Te, overextended use of Fi:
Aversion to perceived loss of integrity and individuality: I have difficulty getting my life organized because I do not pay enough mind to structuring my thoughts, setting good goals, and planning out my activities.
Driving insecurity: I am insecure and unstable because I fear losing myself if I do not do whatever my feelings urge me to do.
Destructive Fi expression: I am imprisoned by negative feelings and my misguided value judgments/belief system.
Integration of Te:
Openness to remedy the distortions of subjective feeling judgments in order to be effective in reducing suffering: my moral instincts are very reliable in helping me channel my individuality, feelings, values, or passions into fruitful and beneficial activities.
Inferior Ti (ESFJ, ENFJ):
Underdeveloped Ti, overextended use of Fe:
Aversion to careful independent impersonal analysis: I have difficulty forming accurate judgments on my own because I do not pay enough mind to impartially assessing the facts and logically analyzing cause-effect.
Driving insecurity: I am insecure and oversensitive because I cannot draw appropriate emotional boundaries and only understand others by how they make me feel or whether they validate me.
Destructive Fe expression: I exploit peopleās feelings and vulnerabilities for my own self-centered benefit and/or express myself with little regard for the social impact.
Integration of Ti:
Openness to impersonal problem solving: I treat people objectively (separate from myself despite my own emotional investment) and know how to make a positive contribution to every relationship.Ā
Inferior Fe (ISTP, INTP):
Underdeveloped Fe, overextended use of Ti:
Aversion to possible constraints on independence: I have difficulty connecting emotionally with others because I do not pay enough mind to their needs/feelings until blindsided by a problem or accused of insensitivity.
Driving insecurity: I am hypercritical because insecurity about being wrong/criticized drives me to prove that I am (more) intelligent, rational, or knowledgeable.
Destructive Ti expression: I use my knowledge and skills in an unethical/harmful manner because I am only responsible to myself.
Integration of Fe:
Openness to feedback, alternative point of views and collaboration: I have clarity of judgment and possess the skills to construct accurate and precise mental models for guiding me in solving problems flexibly and strategically, all while showingĀ genuine compassion and fostering a sense of equality among people.
Inferior Fi (ESTJ, ENTJ):
Underdeveloped Fi, overextended use of Te:
Aversion to vulnerability: I have difficulty acting in ways that promote emotional well-being because I do not pay enough mind to my feelings and values when decision making.
Driving insecurity: I am insecure and controlling because I fear ambiguity, powerlessness, and/or the impotence of not measuring up to externally defined standards of success.
Destructive Te expression: I abuse my power/position to get what I want and/or believe that the weak get what they deserve.
Integration of Fi:
Openness to adopting a more sensitive approach to problem-solving; acceptance of personal flaws and shortcomings: I am a competent leader and a good role model because I know the right approach and attitude to achievement, accomplishment, and success.
Fi vs Fe is often misunderstood as an actual difference in feelings and character, and t types are often mistakenly characterised as unemotional. This is an analogous attempt to explain that Fe and Fi are simply processes that are used to connect with yourself and the world.
Picture a theatre. You're standing up the front, on the stage, just to the side. You can see everything on stage, hear what's backstage, and see the whole audience.
It's packed. The audience = the world. Everyone you engage with.
The lights are your natural empathic gifts. T types can be empaths, it's not related to function. The lights shine on the audience so you can see their faces. Maybe the lights are dim, and you can't make anything out unless they're close. Maybe they're bright, and you can see everything. Empathy can improved, you can learn to turn those lights up. This isn't related to mbti, but how you process the input you're getting does.
Back stage is every feeling you could possibly feel. A myriad of actors who have their own short or dramatic speeches ready to go. A single spotlight shines on the centre of the stage.
Fe
If you have Fe anywhere, you prefer to watch the audience as the performances go on. Your feelings sort themselves out backstage, or tiptoe on the stage at the back. You're generally aware of them, but you prefer to bring audience members onto the stage, into the spotlight. You're fascinated by each person, and want to interrogate and understand them all. You soak up their feelings mentally, and begin to identify yours in the background by matching them with audience member's emotions you've seen before.
Sometimes one of your feelings enters the spotlight. It's been hanging around for a while, so it must really be bothering you after all to take centre stage. Now you pay attention for a moment, and understand by watching it as if it were another person's feeling.
Fe is not about the audience seeing the feelings' performances, it's about the performers seeing the audience. Most feelings are kept away from the spotlight, quietly sorting themselves out back stage. Feelings that insist they need the spotlight must carefully craft their speeches to the audience, because their response is the most important thing. The priority of the performing feeling is to make the audience understand its case without upsetting them. Because of this, Fe can be naturally good at diplomacy, but also very slow to voice contention.
The absolute worst thing that could possibly happen is a feeling refuses to wait any longer. It doesn't carefully craft its speech, it just races into the spotlight and starts screaming, like a deranged animal. Healthy Fe doesn't repress feelings, it just likes to check they're not momentary emotions before expressing them. Being overcome would be a disaster, and would run the risk of horrifying the audience and losing them. This is Fe's greatest fear: the feelings taking over and the audience being lost. Weak or unhealthy Fe is at a greater risk of doing this, since it may repress the feelings until they start screaming on stage about years and years of things they've been putting up with. This poorly manage Fe actually has little do with where it is in the function stack, and more to do with character and assertion.
Due to this constant state of back stage managing, feelings that do present themselves often speak rather robotically. Tps have a strong reputation for this, but Fjs do this too. The feeling causes as little offense as possible by calmly announcing its existence, the cause of its existence, and the solution to the problem. This is well managed Fe.
Fe is not supposed to watch its backstage feelings on stage, it needs to watch the audience. If there is too much emotional distress on stage, the Fe user must focus on themselves and stop the deranged characters screaming their lines, which is deeply distressing to someone who was designed to study the audience. This brings the Fe user into very low Fi, and drains them.
For those who have Fe lower down, these fears may be intensified. Having the function lower down is like being distracted on your phone during the performance and not knowing what's going on in either the audience or the stage at all times. Immature Tps may even attempt to repress all back stage feelings, but mature tps learn it is far safer to allow stage action before the emotions lose control and steal the spotlight. This would ultimately repel the audience, leading to the Fe user's greatest fear. It would leave them isolated and in despair. To rectify this, the tps would have to shift their focus back to the audience, and fix the emotional damage that had been done. Apologies would have to be given, and the actors would have to be sorted out on the stage.
Fi
If you have Fi anywhere, you prefer to watch your feelings on stage as they perform. You want to spotlight each one, interrogate and understand each. You are aware of the audience without watching closely, but they are not the focus. When you do see a feeling in an audience member, you understand it because you've studied your own.
Fi is not about seeing the audience, it is about exploring every feeling of your own and giving it the spotlight. These feelings should not be filtered, they should be raw and truthful. Fi users can express their feelings easily, and don't filter them much. Their primary concern isn't upsetting the audience, it's allowing themselves to be.
Fi does not need the audience to understand, it needs to understand itself. However, if the audience becomes very distressed by the performance, the Fi user must pay attention to them instead. As they begin to jeer, this causes emotional distress in the Fi user. Fi's greatest fear is the audience steals the spotlight, and all sense of self is lost.
This fear may be intensified if Fi is lower down in the function stack. It's like being on your phone while trying to watch a performance - you're going to miss something. Weak or low Fi may deliberately choose to miss things. Since Fi isn't concerned with the audience, Tjs can go too far and ultimately not manage to connect with anyone at all. They may ignore the Fi performance to the point of isolation from themselves and others. Not watching the Fi performance on stage, they pay too much attention to the audience, and shift into very low Fe. They allow people to take their spotlight, fulfilling their deepest fear. They lose themselves and despair. To reclaim themselves they must shift their attention back to their own inner performance, to the feelings they pushed to the back of the stage. They would need to bring them into the spotlight and really pay attention to what the actors are saying must be done. In doing so, they will put the audience back in their place.
a/n: I got so excited when I got this request LOL - hereās some random sfw relationship hcs for these folks! I love hearing from you guys and if youād like more or for a different show I write for lemme know :))))
characters: armin, eren, connie, & jean
Armin
Angry sleep talker LMAOOO
he falls asleep on the couch a lot in the living room and whenever you wake him up heās got the biggest attitude ever and he wonāt remember it at all
Sometimes itās not even words heāll just sleepily look at you like š and then shuffle into the bedroom
But in the morning heās waking you up all sweet
āGāmorning, angel. Want some coffee?ā
On that note, he has the cutest morning voice literally ever. Itās kind of raspy and whiny sounding, little voice cracks here and there, too.
He has to clear his throat a lot in the morning until he has some water cause he canāt help how dry his throat is
And when he talks in his actual sleep itās always angry?? Like heāll be laying next to you and just suddenly mumble something like āIām begging you to shut the fuck up.ā LMAOOO
You recorded and showed him once and he was BAFFLED. Anyways, maybe bedtime tea would do him some good š
OK MOVING ON
At the end of the day, Eren is his best friend, which means he can be just as annoying as Eren ASJDKSKDFN
But he thinks heās slick and heāll act like he ādoesnāt know what heās doingā
Until you tell him to knock it off and heās got this small little smile saying, āknock what off, babe?ā
He canāt help it he loves pushing your buttons and then kissing your cheeks after and giggling, and he thinks itās so cute the way you try to stay grumpy with him when he knows you canāt resist him
Smh men </3
He always compliments at least one thing about you when he sees you every single time
And theyāre specific, too! Even if itās just a āoh my goshhhh you look so cute today!ā Itās followed up by complimenting something specific about you
Has an amazing memory and will constantly check up on you about the smallest things that maybe even you forgot about
āIsnātā the jealous type yet whenever someone seems to be flirting with you he just stands next to you like šš§
And he keeps it up too until the other person gets the hint
In the nicest way possible - he has chihuahua energy
He gets a little overexcited when he sees you sometimes, especially if itās been a little while since heās been able to be with you
And heās got an attitude like no other
Never at you but heās always poppin his mouth off at somebody I stg
This might seem a little ooc for him but AGAIN - heās been Erenās friend for literal years and you canāt tell me he doesnāt act up ever š¤Ø
Especially if youāre involved, it doesnāt matter if he thinks heāll win, heās starting something (itās funny cause it just so happens that Mikasa is right behind him the whole time too whenever he decides to get a lil mouthy LOL)
Anywayssss - heās a lil cheeky but youāre his everything <333
Eren
So annoying so annoying so so annoying
Stg itās his favorite hobby
But itās fine cause heās cute ig šŖ
Heās constantly doting on you
Moving hair out of your eyes when youāre together, fixing your sleeve for you, heās even wiped the corners of your mouth with a napkin while yāall were out eating once like it was nothing š
But he wonāt tell you when your fly is down until he teases you about it first, sorry :/
More socially awkward than he seems, like asking you out took him a good while and he needed lots of convincing and encouragement from his entourage of friends
And if someone only you know were to run into the two of you, heād be standing behind you awkwardly like š while you two talked and heās probably making noises with his mouth and fucking with his sleeves
He also will text you nonsense if heās anxious or waiting somewhere cause he wants to look busy so no one will bother him
He gets to his class first? Hell no itās fucking awkward to sit in silence with your professor like that, heās texting you so they wonāt talk to him
Sometimes itās just the word āhiā over and over again in a single message, but he always goes ādonāt worry about my message Iām about to sendā LMAO
BUT heās also super bubbly and nice when people talk to him, like if the professor were to still spark conversation heād be all smiles and politeness like š thatās great! How was your weekend?
And internally heās screaming and crying like LEAVE ME TF ALONE
Epitome of a āgolden boyā
It also takes him a good while to realize youāre being ~flirty with him in the beginning, but he catches onto it pretty quickly the farther you guys get into your relationship
Actually pretty big on chivalry, but not in an obnoxious or try hard way. Itās pretty natural for him
Always pays the bill, no exceptions, the type to pull your seat out on instinct, tries to get out quick enough to open the door for you (his little jog to get around is really cute too), and sometimes heāll even order the second dish you were debating between so you can have a bite or two
That last one works out really well too cause heās not a picky eater at ALL lol
Heāll also hold your bag(s) for you when you guys go out
He even asked you blatantly if it was okay to kiss you for your guysā first kiss, and officially asked you if he could be your boyfriend in person cause all that stuff matters to him
True definition of a gentleman
You can thank his mama for all that š„°
He likes when you baby him a little in private though
Like if heās sick and you take care of him - even a little - heās like wow Iām marrying them. This is pure domestic love right here.
He is obsessed when you take his clothes and he catches you wearing them, he wonāt tease you about it too often but itās mainly because his heart always does a little flutter when he sees you wearing anything of his. It could even be jewelry lol
Heās pretty forgetful when it comes to important dates, but itās not in a neglectful way, heās just really bad at it š heās even forgotten his moms birthday once and nearly cried about it
Heāll even put reminders on his phone but that doesnāt help either, he just swipes the notification away like ?? And then forgets
This is why he totally has a nerdy little physical calendar in his kitchen AND his room and he writes EVERYTHING down on them too
And a little planner he takes to class! They are not color coded or cute though, just black chicken scratch but hey - if it works it works LOL
Your contact name and photo also changes on a nearly weekly basis depending on something you did or how heās feeling
Connie
A GREAT kisser, and his lips are always soft
Letās just get that out of the way now LOL
It doesnāt matter if itās a quick peck, or full blown making out, it takes your breath away every time
Heāll have you bent in half laughing your ass off with him one moment, and then heās kissing you and smiling the next and your heart can barely take it
Heās very naturally flirty with you too
He doesnāt try too hard or think too much about it, like heās just being him around you and acting with no shame and it works very well in his favor
You can always tell when he wants to kiss you
One way is he keeps amazing eye contact with you when you talk, unless heās thinking about kissing you. Then heāll rest his chin on his palm and start giving you this look; his eyes get a little dreamy and half lidded, he starts to flip between your eyes and your lips, his responses become less animated and more of a collection of hums to let you know heās still ālisteningā.
That and of course heāll say āI want to kiss you so bad right nowā LOL
He also is not afraid of PDA
And he loves holding your hand when you guys walk together
linking arms & having his arm slung around you are good options too
He surprisingly doesnāt tease you often, especially compared to how often him and Sasha get into it
He might gently pick on you here and there but never to the point where itās ridiculously common with him
Even if you were friends first, you always noticed how heād leave you untouched when he was starting shit (most definitely cause he had a crush on you)
Itās mainly because youāre a romantic partner for him, and the last thing heād want to do is make you accidentally insecure about something or hurt your feelings
Truly scared of doing it
Anyways :)
He is very transparent about how serious he is about you since the beginning
Is not shy to tell you how much he likes you, and when he falls in love with you, he tells you that too
He doesnāt see the point in hiding things like that or being too āscaredā to talk about his feelings once you two are in a relationship
It only leads to miscommunication, and why tf would he wanna do that??
That being said, he also tells you every time he has to shit LMAOOO
There are no secrets with him š„“
Really likes squeezing your sides, arms, legs, cheeks, anything. Especially if he gives you a hug
HES SO SO TICKLISH
and it makes him so mad
You tickle him ONCE and heās all ānah babe stop. šā LMAOOOO
He gets so mad because it like paralyzes him
He laughs so hard his stomach hurts and he canāt move š
He says itās his only weakness š
Heās not shy about much, even when you compliment him about his outfit or how he looks, heās actually very good at receiving compliments.
HOWEVER
On a rare occasion, once every blue moon, you can make him very bashful
If you catch him right when he wakes up, and I mean like youāre already awake as heās coming to, and touch his face all gently and call him pretty, heās melting and snuggling into you like ābabe stopppā
He loves to rant and gossip with you, like itās fr one of his biggest hobbies at this point LMAO
Getting coffee and just talking with you makes him so happy
Heās a very simple man who just has a lot of love for you itās insane :)
Jean
When I say this man is whipped for you, I mean whipped
His baby can do no wrong honestly
A teensy bit jealous but it never crosses any lines or boundaries, but he can be a bit pouty sometimes if he gets a little jealous
Will randomly buy you things but not tell you heās bought them LOL
Youāll just get a package one day and youāre like ??? Until heās like yeah thatās for you open it :)
By now you just know if a random package appears at your doorstep it has to be Jean
He has the definition of heart eyes for you at all times
Yk in cartoons where they float behind the person theyāre in love with and they look like š bc yeah ^ thatās him LMAO
If he sees you heās jogging up to you like š hey baby!
here are some more icky headcanons for the aot characters! i am so so happy you all enjoyed pt 1 so much :) i added more characters to this one based on ur guys requests so i hope you enjoy and dont hate me after this lol
eren:
eats his eggs with ketchup like a literal delinquent. like completely submerges them in it. you guys go out to breakfast and heās like wanna share? and ur like š FUCK no. also pours ketchup ON the fries and not NEXT to them when you guys share
asksĀ āwho is thatā every single time you say hello to someone. heās like a 5 year old and ur his mother. he does it as soon as you pass them too, he literally cannot contain himself at the fact that you know people who are not him āwho was that?āĀ āsomeone from my chemistry labāĀ āā¦who is she?āĀ āthe barista from the coffee shop downtownāĀ
he watches you play games on ur phone from over ur shoulder and then gets mad when you lose orĀ āmake a bad moveā ??? you tell him to download the game on his phone if heās so interested in it and heās like nah but the second you open candy crush heās like šµļøāāļøbaby switch out the red and green one
mikasa:
when she eats with a fork, she scrapes the fuck out of the metal with her teeth :/ she doesnāt even realize sheās doing it but you can hear her teeth against the metal with every single bite she takes. please get that checked out at the dentist babes
is a disney adult. iām sorry but she is. jokes about havingĀ āpeter pan syndromeā and that sheās just a kid at heart <3 probably has like 60 different pairs of mickey ears and gets mad when little kids cry at disney world like it isnāt meant for them and sheās the one out of line???
doesnāt have separate music playlists. she just has one playlist with every song sheās ever liked on it. theres like 1000+ songs on it. she puts it on for every single occasion shes on aux: in the car, at a party, cleaning around the house. its on while you guys are having sex and then Old Town Road comes on :/
armin:
refuses to download tik tok because he thinks he will get too addicted, but watches tik toks through instagram reels??? as if thats any different??? itās always trends or videos that are months old too, like he shows you a video that was popular so long ago and you have to smile and nod while you watch it and pretend you havent seen it
also sends you cringey pinterest couples with his whole entire chest. he will send you those head ass couple posts from 2012 tumblr and be like baby this is us!!! and you have to be like NO TF ITS NOT.
hes such a picky eater :/ like every time he goes out its either chicken fingers or pasta w butter (which is delicious but besides the point). he has a specific answer for why he hates every single food (even if heās never tried it???) hes likeĀ āmushrooms are a literal fungus why would i eat thatā orĀ āyogurt has live bacteria in it, ill passā armin. just grow up.Ā
what icks do you think the aot boys are guilty of having lol
aot boys x icks!
now THIS is content i can get behind
eren:
is the type of guy to think that just letting the water hit him in the shower is washing his body... like you're showering together and ur scrubbing ur legs w body wash or something and he's like wait... you wash your legs? like you don't just let the water and soap hit them? boy WHAT
tries to start a podcast and thinks hes making really profound points but its the most basic shit like "working out actually improves your mental health"
his hair gets greasy really easily but he doesnt like to wash it every day bc it dries it out. you recommend dry shampoo and he REFUSES because itĀ āmakes his hair look grayā and ur like no not if you apply it like this and rub it in!!!! he doesnt listen
accidentally airs ur dirty laundry and secrets to all of ur friends LMFAO he really doesnt mean to though but youll all be having dinner or something and someone will order a specific food and heāll be likeĀ āwait baby isnt that the food that gives you really bad gas?ā goodbye
the classic "THIS IS FOR YOU <3" and misses
armin:
uses the š„ŗ emoji way too much for a grown ass man. like its cute sometimes but its definitely his most used emoji. also says "sowwy" when ur mad at him :/
loves when you scratch his back/head but only does urs for like 2 mins LMFAO. ur taking turns in bed and when its his turn to scratch he does it for like 30 seconds and is like my turn :) or im tired goodnight :) also gets mad when you stop unexpectedly. gives you side eye
drools in his sleep LMFAO. sleeps with his mouth open and its not that big of a deal unless heās sleeping on you and you wake up with a fucking wet patch on your chest as if a baby was napping on you
prefers you without make up and doesnt really understand that you wear it for personal or creative reasons, like he automatically assumes its because youāre insecure or covering something up. like youre going out and having fun getting ready and looking pretty and hes likeĀ āwhy do you wear makeup when you are so beautiful naturally? :)āĀ
buys millennial merch likeĀ ādont talk to me before my coffeeā or those signs that sayĀ ādogs welcome! people toleratedā also calls dogsĀ āfloofersā andĀ ādoggosā
jean:
genuinely says sheesh. like not as a joke. he'll be like sheesh baby you look so good today and you'll have to hide ur embarrassment lol
is the type to NEVER let you get away with stuttering or fumbling ur words. you know that tik tok thats like "you ever stutter so hard you just have to stfu" thats you around jean LMFAO. you mispronounce one word and hes never letting you forget it
NEVER FINISHES A WATER BOTTLE. he will leave half filled bottles all over the place and then have the audacity to open a new one and drink it infront of you???
sleeps like a LOG. will not move. when he snores and you try to kick him a little bit to be like hey turn over ur snoring, he is not waking up. he gets up the next morning whistling a little tune looking like he just had the best sleep of his life and you crawl out of bed like a gremlin who almost fell off the bed and listened to his snores for 10 hours
such a music snob he will be likeĀ ābaby i recently discovered this really good song you probably havent heard of it its super undergroundā and its tame impala LOL
connie:
hes a mouth breather. he also chews so fuckin loud. you guys are sitting at the kitchen table, eating breakfast & minding ur own business, and he is going to TOWN on his food. close ur mouth. imbecile
kinda the same topic but definitely bites his icecream / popsicles. you are starting to think he doesnt have feeling in his front teeth anymore. he smacks the fuck out of ice as a "snack"
laughs along with a joke that you know damn well he doesnt understand PLEASE it could be an inside joke w you and your girlfriends and hes trying to butt into the conversation like "HAHAHA"
his phone is always greasy and has crumbs in the cracks of the case and shit. ur like oh babe can you take a pic of me real quick??? and its so blurry because of the shit on his lens
leaves the toilet seat up every. single. time. especially not fun when you pee in the middle of the night and fall in with sleepy tired eyesĀ
levi:
sleeps with socks on. LET UR DOGS BREATHE LEVI. he thinks sleeping barefoot is nasty so he puts on a new pair of socks every time he gets into bed
has to correct you, even on tiny minute details. youre telling a story and youre like "so we waited in line for like 30 minutes" and hes like "it was actually 45." or "we went out to eat last monday" "it was tuesday but ok" like ENOUGH. let me have something
worst. backseat. driver. ever. you could break a little too quickly ONE time and hes so dramatic about it.Ā āthat wasnt a complete stopāĀ āyouāre supposed to be in the next laneāĀ āthat car was in your blindspot and you didnt even lookāĀ
answers the phone withĀ āwhatā every single time. not a hello??? how are you??? how was your day??? it sounds like a chore but in reality he just doesnt like technology and thinks phone calls/texts should be as concise and quick as possible
has literally no decor in his house/apartment like it actually looks uninhabited. has like one couch and a bed. you offer to help him pick some things out and hes likeĀ āim always at work anyways why would i need a tableā
reiner:
likes drake LMFAO not even old drake (when he was good) but like new "say that you a lesbian girl me too" drake
repeats a joke that didn't land because he thinks you didn't hear it. but you did. it just wasn't funny
when you guys first started talking he was definitely the guy to be like "ur so beautiful, whats a girl like you doing with a little ugly boy like me???" when you guys are in a relationship youre able to see that its just his insecurities manifesting but. it was cringey at first
i just know this mf has dirty ass fingernails. like they are short and well kept but there is always DIRT AND GRIME under them. you make him wash his hands before he touches you
cant be quiet for the life of him. he has loud ass footsteps. like ur sleeping and granted he is trying so hard to be quiet but he literally cannot. slams his drawers, shuts the door so loud, will play a video on his phone full blast. and then when you stir from your sleep and glare at him hes like āgood morningā
porco:
genuinely says "without me? :(" when you say you are about to shower LMFAOOOO its kinda funny when you guys are in an established relationship bc u can just smack him but he is definitely guilty of saying it seriously when you two were in the talking stage
accidentally mansplains things to you. not in a demeaning or belittling way but like youll make a joke about "why cant we just print more money" and this business major head ass is like "baby...are you serious...because inflation will-" like OKAYYYY it was a joke
his hair is so crunchy from all of the hair product/gel he uses on it. sometimes when hes fresh out of the shower youll compliment his natural hair as an attempt to get him to lay off the gel. his hair is so hard you could drop a brick on his head and it would deflectĀ
backwashes in all of your shared drinks
manspreads, especially in public. youll be sitting in a crowded place and he is openly sprawled out extremely comfortable while a woman with a baby is giving him a dirty look
i had a lot of fun coming up with these! i hope this was what you were asking for :3 thanks for requesting!
Book!Triss making huge convoluted theories about how the witchers are secretly preparing ciri for mutations and pulling the wool over her eyes about it is so fucking funny because she thinks that they're trying to outsmart her and she's caught on to them and she's super proud of it but like..... these are five witchers sharing vesemir's one and only brain cell. they all started panicking once because ciri chugged a whole mug of white gull before they could even stop her. sorry triss but you can only outsmart them if they're being smart in the first place
maybe you shouldāve spent 20 weeks learning how to write and respect the fucking source material instead of vodka-slurping but that would honestly explain a lot smhĀ
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