content warning(s): reader smokes cigarettes, polysaja x reader, reader (me) is lowkey a brat
A/N: Sometimes I pretend what it's like to have someone who loves me and cares about my health. But then I remember that'll never happen because I'm not dateable (but if I were dating someone and they sat me down to try and get me to stop smoking, I'd do it in a heartbeat). This is essentially a self-insert, but I figured I'd share it anyway. Also, I absolutely live for the boys' bickering. I think this is one of my favourite writings as of late, and that even if YOU don't smoke (don't smoke, period), this is still a super cute read.
You sat in your living room, tucked out of the way. The couch and floor are taken up by the five big bone heads that make up the Saja Boys, who are all currently yelling at one another while playing Mario Kart. You don’t even own a switch, and when you asked them why they brought it here to play?
“No offense, but your place is boring… if we leave the switch there, we at least have something to do.”
It doesn’t really bother you, the apartment isn’t meant to fit five grown men and yourself. Which is why most hangouts don’t happen at your place, or at least they didn’t until recently. At the end of the day, it’s easiest to chalk it up to them wanting to get out, and your place just so happens to be the best place to get away from work.
The sudden spike in volume breaks you from your daydreaming, and briefly, you’re stuck worried about your poor neighbors. Abby and Baby are both arguing, poised to start throwing hands at any second, while Romance and Jinu are stuck wedging themselves between the two. Romance’s soft voice reminds them that they aren’t at home, their roughhousing will only break something here.
Mystery stands off to the side, and the two of you make eye contact. He shrugged and turned his head back to the TV and started the next round, whether they were ready or not. The countdown caught their attention just in time for at least Abby and Baby to stop bickering and focus on Mario Kart.
The dull throbbing in your head from their bickering never goes away, you love the boys more than anything, but when Abby and Baby get into it, you want nothing more than to throttle both of them.
With their attention drawn back to the game, you quietly got up and grabbed your pack of cigarettes and lighter before carefully stepping onto the balcony, silencing their voices the moment the glass door slid closed.
A sigh of relief leaves your lips as you sit down at the small chair and table, the cool air on your face helping ease the throbbing in your skull. After lighting up a cigarette, you sat there, the muffled bickering turning into background noise while you smoked.
Mystery is the first one to notice you’re gone, the sudden scent of cigarette smoke hitting his nose. His sudden, abrupt movement causes the rest to look at him in confusion, which goes ignored as he shoves Jinu’s face out of the way to get past him and heads straight for the balcony.
The balcony door catches your attention, and before you can even finish your hit, the cigarette is being ripped out of your hand and crumpled in someone’s hand. “Hey! That’s hot, shit head!”
“So that’s why you smell like cigarette smoke…” Mystery flatly replies, opening his palm and letting you grab the now-smashed cigarette.
“Why else would I smell like cigarette smoke?”
“Someone else is smoking around you.”
Your mouth opens and closes a few times, unable to find any words of argument as you drop the crushed cigarette into the ashtray. Another arm reaches out from behind you and yanks the pack of cigarettes before you can even grab them.
“Jagiya,” Romance’s voice is soft, but there’s a tone of concern in the pet name, “You smoke?”
You know better than to look at him and stupidly did so anyway, Romance’s crestfallen expression stabbing you straight in the heart. Mystery certainty wasn’t helping, looking like a kicked puppy with his bottom lip slightly sticking out. You grab your chest dramatically and look away, unable to look at them.
“Aish…” You wave your hand at the two of them lazily. “You two worry too much, I’m not gonna just keel over.”
Romance grabbed you by the wrist and pulled you up from the seat and back into the house, while Mystery grabbed your lighter and ashtray, bringing them back inside. The others watched in confusion as Romance pulled you to the front of the group, blocking the TV and earning a quiet ‘move’ from Baby.
He watched you cross your arms and mimicked your annoyed stance. “Yes, really.”
“Someone want to explain why your flat ass is blocking the TV?” Baby grumbled.
Romance shot Baby a glare, and somehow that’s enough for Baby to ease up and take it seriously. “Did any of you know that our little soul was smoking?”
“Smoking hot.” Someone smacked Abby in the back of the head, “ow”.
Jinu looked at you, confused, until Mystery walked over and showed them the pack of cigarettes like it was a show and tell.
One of them says your name, but you’re too busy trying to sink into the floor, even as you gradually try slipping to the ground. Romance’s grip on your wrist keeps you on your feet. “I’m a grown adult, ah, older than all of you!” You scolded.
“Then why are you acting like a fussy child, trying to slip out of my hold?” The bitter tone in Romance’s voice has not just you, but the others flinching as if they were the ones being scolded.
Jinu, ever the angel, comes to your rescue, sort of. “How long have you been smoking?”
“You haven’t always smelt like cigarette smoke…” Mystery tacked on.
You idly fuss, moving your arm this way and that while Romance’s hold remains firm. “Uh, almost a year?”
The question makes you blush in embarrassment, Romance tugging you forward when you try to hide behind him. “You’ll laugh at me…”
“Jagiya, my soul, we would never laugh. This is a serious discussion.” Romance’s grip loosens on your wrist, and he takes your hand in his, giving it a gentle, reassuring squeeze.
“Aiya…” You sigh and rub your face with your free hand. “Boredom.”
“Boredom?” Baby repeats. “You dead ass?”
Jinu reaches over Abby and shoves Baby’s head down in a crude apology. “Ignore him. What do you mean by boredom?”
“Well,” you sigh, uncomfortably shifting foot to foot. “I’m not dumb, I know smoking is bad. It’s not something I do all the time, though I have been smoking more lately…”
“Stress?” Mystery chimes in.
“Eugh, don’t remind me.” You jokingly wave your hand towards the pack of cigarettes, and Mystery crushes the box in his hand. “My cigarettes! You!” Romance holds your hand tightly, your leg and free arm flailing at Mystery as an empty threat to kick his ass.
“Focus,” he scolded, his free hand coming up to hold your chin in place. “Have things really been that bad that you turned to smoking?”
Unease bubbles in your chest at the forced eye contact, knowing that all of them were staring at you with varying expressions, no doubt judging you. “I mean, I could be doing worse things…” His grip tightens on your chin, and your eyes close. “I don’t know what you want to hear! You know how I am! I was offered, said screw it and gave it a try, and figured why not. If it works for others, maybe it’ll help me, but it didn’t!”
Romance’s grip loosens enough for you to push yourself away from him. You chew on your bottom lip, immediately drawing blood, and back up enough to sit on the edge of the TV console. “It hasn’t done a damn thing but make me feel sick, frankly, it’s a miracle anyone stupid enough thinks that shit helps.”
“No, I said I gave it a try to see if it did anything. I never once expected it to actually help me, little shit.”
Baby stuck out his tongue and looked at the now-crushed box of cigarettes in Mystery’s hand. “How come you don’t taste like cigarettes?” he asked, trying to lighten the mood.
You cringe at his question, looking at him in minor disgust. “Excuse me?”
His eyes roll, but the smirk doesn’t disappear. “Not like that, I meant you’re mouth. Kissing, dumbass.”
Romance grabbed the back of your shirt at your attempt to sneak away, as if there weren’t four other grown men capable of stopping you. “Don’t try and slink off, jagiya. Answer his question.”
“I mean, like I said, I don’t smoke that often, and it’s not like I’m smoking a whole cigarette every time. It’s just a few puffs, plus I brush my teeth afterwards.”
Jinu stood up, startling everyone briefly as he walked over to you and pulled you into his arms. “I think that’s enough questions for now…” Romance and he share a few looks, Jinu shaking his head as he finally pulls back enough to let you stare up at him. “No more smoking, if you feel like smoking, then tell one of us.” He brushed a strand of hair behind your ear and looked between the others.
Everyone shared a nod before staring expectantly at you. “Okay…”
Tensions in the room still lingered, and in an attempt to lighten the mood, Baby waved his half of the controller around. “Alright, now move your asses out of the way. I wanna get back to kicking Abby’s ass.”
“I got ahead of you, jackass!”
“Only because lover boy’s flat ass blocked the TV!”
You didn’t need to look up at Romance to know what expression quickly consumed his face, his skin briefly flickering out of the corner of your eye. “I’ll show you flat, munchkin.”
Jinu pulled you out of the way and returned to the couch, tugging you along. He ignored your curious expression and sat down. When you did not attempt to move, he pulled you onto his lap and made himself comfortable. Or as comfortable as one could get with three people arguing over a dumb game two meters away.
Mystery threw away the pack of cigarettes before taking Abby’s spot and sat beside Jinu, pulling your legs up onto his lap. His fingertips idly stroked at your ankle while you melted into Jinu’s hold, an unknown weight leaving your shoulders.
Now, a new weight fell on your shoulders. What on earth were you going to give your neighbors in apology for their loud asses?
