Incorrect Sherlock Quotes

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

Mrs Hudson: HEY!

John: SHHH sherlock’s sleeping

Mrs. Hudson, whispering: oh sorry

John, whispering: what’s up

Mrs. Hudson, whispering: there’s a fire

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

John: I'm going to the store, do you want anything?

Sherlock: a murder case

John: I have like 10 pounds.

[rabbit-in-blue]

Sherlock: I'm Sherlock Holmes, I wear the damn hat.

John: Bad hair day, uh?

Sherlock: Shut up John...

This is for @notagarroter and for all the sherlockian curly hair people how sick vindication for their struggles...

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

John: snails aren't fast. but snails are good. have you ever seen a snail with bad morals?

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

Highwayman: *points pistol* Your money or your life.

Sherlock: Oh, thank god. *hands over papers* Just so you know, you're a counsulting detective. you are also wanted for 12 murder cases

Highwayman: No, I meant-...

Sherlock: *already running away* You're late for your first hearing!

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

Molly: What is love?

Mycroft: An emotional minefield.

Sherlock: A neurochemical reaction.

John: Baby don't hurt me.

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

Anderson: *carrying around a potted plant*

Molly: ........ why is Anderson walking around holding a tree?

John: Sherlock ordered him to.

Molly: .......why?

Sherlock: it’s to replace the oxygen he wastes when he speaks.

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

Sherlock: my cold, dark heart has no affection for anyone

John: *sneezes*

Sherlock: what's wrong? are you sick? where's your jacket? it's because you went jogging in the cold again didn't you? here, i'll make you some soup.

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

Sherlock: [gets a paper cut] ouch!

John: haha you idiot

[a few minutes later]

Mrs. Hudson: so let me get this straight, you want to ban the use of paper in the house?

John: it’s dangerous, ok?

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

Sherlock, over the phone: Gavin, I need you to come pick me up right now

Lestrade: why

Sherlock: John is passive-aggressively doing the dishes he asked me to do six hours ago

Sherlock: this house isn’t safe anymore

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

John: you know that feeling where your heart skips a beat?

Sherlock: That's called arrhythmia

John: I get that feeling every time I see y-

Sherlock, now very concerned: you can die from it

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

John, holding a python: Hey, I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him?

Mrs. Hudson: You did WHAT–

Sherlock, not looking up from his book: William Snakespeare.

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

Sherlock, watching someone start a bar fight: What an idiot

Sherlock: Wait

Sherlock: That’s my idiot

Sherlock:

Sherlock: [stands up and leaves]

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

Sherlock: I consider myself saphiosexual. That means I'm attracted to intelligent people and intelligent people only.

John: *trips over air and apologises to it*

Sherlock: ...I want that one.

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

Hey guys! it would be super cool if you could send me/tag me in quotes you like! i”m kinda running out rn and i’m trying to keep this blog up but I only have a few quotes in my queue at a time. If you send one in, I’ll tag u when it gets posted unless you ask me not to. Also, if i don’t post one you send in it doesn’t mean i don’t like it. It might be at the bottom of the queue or tumblr might have swollowed it. If you have any questions, feel free to ask!

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

John: Is something burning?

Sherlock: Just my passion for you.

John: Sherlock the toaster is on fire

[incorrect--sherlock-quotes]

Sherlock: [to John] I cant be without you

John: Still doesn’t make it cute that you followed me to the bathroom