Wibba Libba Doobdoob!

I mean, these SOUND like things they'd say. This blog runs on a queue, 1 a day. Sometimes more, but probably not.

[incorrect-rickandmortyquotes]

Storage Rick: Alright, everyone, pay attention. I have an announcement to make and I only have a minute.

Mortys: Why? Are you in a hurry?

Storage Rick: No, I was referring to your relatively short attention spans.

[incorrect-rickandmortyquotes]

Rick: "I'm not real good with advice. Could I interest you in a sarcastic comment?"

[incorrect-rickandmortyquotes]

Rick: "I knew it! God wouldn't let me be this happy!"

Morty: "I thought you didn't believe in god, Rick."

Rick: I believe in him for the bad stuff!"

[incorrect-rickandmortyquotes]

Rick: If I was a better person I'd ignore them and move on with my life.

Rick: But I'm not. *laughs*

(from Animaniacs!)

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Morty: Ricky? Do you mind if I call you "Ricky"?

Rick: Well, it's a little perky.

Morty: And you can call me Mort-Mort!

[incorrect-rickandmortyquotes]

Listen here, ya little shithead. No one, and I mean no one, can ever know about this. It'll be the end of you, it'll be the end of me, and worst of all, it'll be the end of me.

Rick Sanchez, probably after Rick Potion#9

[incorrect-rickandmortyquotes]

Morty: (singing) Nobody knows the trouble I’ve seen. Nobody knows my sorrow . . . Rick: C'mon Morty, lighten up! Sing something with a little b-eurgh-bounce in it. Morty: (singing) It’s a small world after all . . . Rickl: NO! NO. ANYTHING BUT THAT! —The Lion King

[incorrect-rickandmortyquotes]

Morty: Why would you think any of this was a good idea? Rick: Probably because I’m a dangerous sociopath with a long history of violence. Morty: Oh. Rick: I don’t understand how you keep forgetting that. —Llamas With Hats

[incorrect-rickandmortyquotes]

Hey, so... anyone know a good place to get quotes for this?

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Rick:Seatbelts?! Those are for nerds. You boys aren't nerds are you? Cause this ain't the need taxi!

[incorrect-rickandmortyquotes]

Jerry: But you're supposed to be dead! Rick: Yeah, and you're supposed to be dumpster diving for ham scraps, you six-piece chicken McNobody.

[incorrect-rickandmortyquotes]

Morty: What are those marks on your neck Rick? Rick: Kisses from the universe Unity: I'm the universe

[incorrect-rickandmortyquotes]

Some people freak out about the age difference. They say, “What’s this sixty-year-old man doing with a being five times his age?” They can call me cradle snatcher. Who cares?

-Unity (What We Do In the Shadows)

[incorrect-rickandmortyquotes]

rick: hey wanna see a cool magic trick jerry: sure rick: turn around jerry: *turns around* rick: *pulls out a gun* (from a vine can't remember what its called)

[incorrect-rickandmortyquotes]

Rick: Forget about it Morty: It's forgot-abouten

[incorrect-rickandmortyquotes]

Jerry: I’m the cool parent. That’s my thing.

Jerry: I’m hip. I surf the web. I text.

Jerry: LOL. Laugh out loud. OMG, oh my god. WTF, why the face.

Jerry: I know all the dances to high school musical, so…

[incorrect-rickandmortyquotes]

Rick, texting: FaceTime me.

Birdperson, texting back: And see your potato chip looking face? No, thanks.

Rick: Remind me why we’re friends.

Birdperson: I amm the only one that can keep your ego in check.