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markus: okay, so. what should we do now ? we have some time to kill.

connor, still trying to be flirty: w-what.. who are we even going to kill ?

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markus: oh my god, a dog

markus, to dog: hello, sir. my husband sends his regards. he’s a big fan

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connor: you guys have no idea what i’m capable of

markus: i don’t want to be rude but it feels as though i’m being threatened by a cupcake

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markus: what would you say is your weakness ?

connor: those eyes

[making out ensues]

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markus, frantic: DID ANYONE SEE MY HUSBAND !!! if you see connor please let me know !! he STOLE SOMETHING FROM ME !!

deviants: ???!

north: what

markus, shaking north by the shoulders: HE STOLE MY HEART

north: i regret

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markus: excuse me north that is my emotional support deviant hunter can you not threaten his life or maim him in any way

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Ii was looking at kinda older posts and found an anon saying you should live with yours tits out, but i guess you cant do that anymore so like, de tit yourself i guess

tumblr can suck my dick. carpe pectum, c’est la tit, vive la dick. some other fuckin iteration with “tit” or “cock” or whatever in it

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Happy birth!

thank u

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wait is it your bday cuz then that means we share the same bday and I’ll scream

it was my birthday. happy cap season and many happy returns to you, matey !!

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connor, doing 1 decidedly not very Deviant Hunter Thing:

connor: Markus ???

markus: good job connor

connor:

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connor: im gay so like. im bad with maths

markus: ¿¿ that doesn’t add up ??

connor: exactly.

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[3 A.M. at Jericho]

connor, thru internal comms: hey markus

markus, thru internal comms: hey beautiful

north, highjacking their convo:

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simon: i hope this new year we achieve all the things we want ✨✨

north: ✨😌 passing this good karma 😌✨

markus: north why did you just give your gun to connor

connor: ✨✨thank you for the good karma✨✨

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markus: connor could, like, get it*

(it*: a relationship built on trust, understanding, mutual respect, and love.)

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connor: Catch These Hands, Markus!

markus: !!!!

connor: with your hands

connor: we’re holding hands now

markus: this is nice

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connor: h

markus: the paleness of his skin begs for me to taint it with the reds, oranges, and blues of my sins. he moves so quietly, so seamlessly against the backdrop of the ugliest realities that no one can see him, my marks on his body like targets for i and i alone. he smiles and suddenly my life is filled with a sudden burst of light not unlike a red flare, daring me to come look, to come find—

north: oh my god his tumblr system’s on again. josh go turn it off

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connor: you ever wonder what your future husband is doing ?

markus and hank, at the same time: what are you doing ?

north, whispering to connor: i bet 50 on the bear

simon, whispering back: 50 on jesus