Incorrect Brodinson Quotes

What if Hela, Loki, and Thor got along? Well, probably conversations like this!

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Thor: Remember! Curiosity killed the cat!

Loki: Yes, but you forget that satisfaction brought it back. So yes, Hela, go find out if that thing can catch fire!

Thor: You're a bad influence.

Loki: And you don't know your sayings.

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Hela, reading a recipe: Beat three eggs?

Thor: It means like in hand-to-hand combat.

Hela: Ohhhh-

Loki: Both of you get out of this kitchen.

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Hela: Not gonna lie, I'm kind of afraid of Loki...

Thor, who's been stabbed one too many times: As you should be.

Hela: No, for real, she's kind of-

Thor: As. You. Should. Be.

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Thor: When I was a kid, Loki told me that the paper strip that’s in the chocolate kisses were edible and I ate them with the chocolate for a year.

Hela: They are!

Thor: FOR REAL?!

Hela: No! Why did you fall for it again?

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Thor: So what, now I’m just supposed to do everything that Loki does? What if they jump off a cliff?

Hela: If Loki were to jump off a cliff, she would have done his due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry. So yes, if you see Loki jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff.

Thor: You jump off a cliff!

Hela: Gladly, provided Loki did first.

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Loki: Nice rock.

Thor: Thanks, Hela gave it to me.

Hela: I threw it at you!

Thor: Isn't she the sweetest?

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Thor: I told Loki that his ears turn red when they lie.

Hela: Do they?

Thor: No.

Hela: Then why did you tell her that?

Thor: Because I can do this.

Thor: Hey Loki! Do you love us?

Loki, with their hands over his ears: No.

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Loki: So what’s the plan?

Thor: I don’t know. You’re smart.

Thor, pointing at Hela: She's mean. You can come up with something.

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Thor: Yesterday, I overheard Hela saying “Are you sure this is a good idea?” and Loki replying “Trust me,” and I have never moved from one room to another so quickly in my life.

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Thor, looking at Loki: Baby boy. Baby.

Thor, looking at Hela: Evil.

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Hela: Loki just insisted Thor and I remember a code word in case we’re ever confronted by his clone or a cyborg doppelgänger and we’re not sure which is the real them and which is the imposter.

Hela: Some families have a fire escape plan, but not us.

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Loki: We need to open this locked door. Thor, give me your credit card.

Thor: Here.

Loki, pocketing it: Thanks. Hela, break down the door.

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Loki: It smells like henway in here.

Thor:

Hela: Thor.

Hela, forcefully: Doesn't it smell like henway in here?

Thor: *sigh*

Thor: What's a henway?

Loki: OH ABOUT TEN POUNDS!

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Hela: What are you writing?

Loki: Thor's little Midgardian's NATO wants to know what kind of weapons we have in the armory. I'm letting them know it's private information.

Thor, looking over Loki's shoulder: This just says 'fuck around and find out' in calligraphy.

Hela: Well, do they want to find out?

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Hela: Goddamn it, the printer broke while printing out Loki's birthday invitations.

Thor: Well, what are they supposed to say?

Hela: "Loki's birthday".

Thor: So, what do they say instead?

Hela: "Loki’s bi".

Thor:

Thor, remembering everyone Loki's slept with: Works out either way.

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Thor, reading the speech Loki wrote him: Without ugly, there would be no beauty in this world.

Thor, squinting at the paper: Thank you for your sacrifice, Hela.

[incorrectbrodinsons]

Loki: The best way to gain someone's undying loyalty is by saving them from a perilous situation.

Thor: So you're just gonna wait until Hela is in danger and save her?

Loki: Of course not, I'm going to create a situation that puts her in danger and then save her.

Thor: ...

Thor: You're insane.