Incorrect High School DxD Quotes

[incorrectdxd]

Rias: I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say? Akeno: Just start quoting WAP lyrics.

[incorrectdxd]

Irina: WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO??? Rossweisse: COSTCO IS MAGICAL Xenovia: I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.

[incorrectdxd]

Akeno: Take me to Art Museums and make out with me…

Issei: But they said not to touch the masterpieces.

Akeno: Well, someone’s gotta pin the artwork to the wall…

Koneko: President! Those idiots are trying to do it in the East Wing again!

[incorrectdxd]

Rias: [reading instructions] "Roast the chicken for 25 minutes, or 30 minutes if you have large breasts." ... Rias: Better do 30 minutes.

[incorrectdxd]

Kuroka: I can't sleep... 😏

Vali: I can. Goodnight.

[incorrectdxd]

Akeno: Google, please stop showing me sex ads. I know there are desperate sluts in my area; I have a mirror.

[incorrectdxd]

Raynare: My red flags are big, but so are my boobs.

[incorrectdxd]

Issei: Fuck you! This isn’t a ritual! This is terrorism!

Raynare: [scoffs] Isn’t that a popular word these days…?

Issei: What? “Fuck?”

Raynare: No, Issei. “Terrorism!”

[incorrectdxd]

Irina: Don’t break anyone's heart! They only have one!

Xenovia: Break their bones, they have 206 of them.

[incorrectdxd]

Azazel: Hello, Raynare. Make anyone cry today?

Raynare: Sadly, no. But it’s only 4:30.

[incorrectdxd]

[incorrectdxd]

Vali: Send dudes.

Kuroka: You mean nudes?

Vali: I'm in a fight. I need more men.

[incorrectdxd]

Rossweisse: I think I'm having a mid-life crisis. Azazel: You're like 20 years old... Rossweisse: I MIGHT DIE AT 30!!

[incorrectdxd]

Issei: In my defense, I was left unsupervised. Rias: Wasn't Akeno with you? Akeno: In my defense, I was also left unsupervised.

[incorrectdxd]

Rias: Stop right there! We’re here to stop this senseless destruction of our town!

Kokabiel: 92.

Rias: This has gone on for too long, and now, you’re going to pay!

Kokabiel: 355.

Rias: We are- What are you-

Kokabiel: Oh don’t mind me, please go on.

Rias: And... We are the ones who will stop you!

Kokabiel: Oh wow. 419.

Rias: That’s it, what the hell are you doing?!

Kokabiel: Oh sorry, it’s just a little hobby of mine. I hear these heroic speeches so wearily often that I’ve started making a mental list of how many times I hear certain lines.

Rias: You- You insane bastard!

Kokabiel: 190!

Issei: Yeah?...Well we’re going to... f🤬k your face!

Kokabiel: Oh my... 12.

Issei: 😡

[incorrectdxd]

[while training in the mountains]

Issei: What a week, huh?

Tannin: It is Wednesday, Red Dragon Emperor.

[incorrectdxd]

Riser: If I hear "Wonderful Christmastime" one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.