neutella

She/Her • incorrect quotes go to hhriscanonbitches.com to join a H/Hr discord server. DMs are always open • Submissions are okay

[incorrectharmione]

Harry: You love me, right, Hermione?

Hermione: Normally, I’d say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere and I don’t like it.

[incorrectharmione]

Harry: I can explain.

Hermione: Can you?

Harry: If you give me thirty seconds to think of a lie.

[incorrectharmione]

Hermione: You often use humor to deflect trauma

Harry: Thank you

Hermione: I didn't say that was a good thing

Harry: What I'm hearing is, you think I'm funny

[incorrectharmione]

Harry: I learned some very valuable lessons from this.

Hermione: I’m guessing they are all horrible distortions on the lessons you actually should’ve taken away.

Harry: Death isn’t real, and I’m basically God.

*Hermione facepalms*

[incorrectharmione]

Harry: Let’s watch Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

Hermione: Okay.

Harry: And make out during the scary parts.

Hermione: Th-

Hermione: The scary parts.

Hermione: Of Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

[incorrectharmione]

Harry: So are we flirting right now?

Hermione: I AM LITERALLY JINXING YOU

Harry: That doesn’t answer my question

[incorrectharmione]

Harry, sighing: If only someone out there loved me.

Hermione, whispering: If only Harry knew how much I loved him.

Ron, yelling: If only you two would just look at each other and confess god dammit.

[incorrectharmione]

Hermione: Can I have directions?

Harry: To where?

Hermione: Your heart.

[incorrectharmione]

Hermione: Hey Harry can you do me a favor?

Harry: I would literally plant my DNA in a crime scene for you, but go on.

Hermione: Can you do the dishes for me tonight?

Harry:

Harry: No, sorry.

[incorrectharmione]

Harry, trying to be threatening: Listen here don't underestimate me or else I will cut your arm off in half understand?!

Hermione: don't underestimate what? Your bravery or your stupidity?

[incorrectharmione]

*Harry and Hermione chilling on a bed together*

Harry: we're just friends being friends

Hermione: What are you a historian? Harry we've been married for five years.

Harry: Just a couple of bestfriends chilling on a bed :D

[incorrectharmione]

Harry: Your advice changed my life.

Hermione: All I said was don’t eat soap...

[incorrectharmione]

Harry: *searching around*

Ron: what are you looking for?

Harry: my will to live

Hermione: *walks into room*

Harry: nevermind. I found her.

[incorrectharmione]

Hermione: *eating something* oh my god this tastes amazing!

Harry: can I have a taste too?

Hermione: sure

Harry: *leans in and kisses Hermione* you’re right. this is good

Hermione: *blushes furiously* y- yeah...

[incorrectharmione]

Hermione: Can I just, you know, kiss you for the rest of my life. 

Harry: 

Hermione: Pretty please

[incorrectharmione]

Godrics Hollow

[incorrectharmione]

Hermione, bleeding out:

Harry: what's your blood type?!

Hermione: B positive...

Harry, panicking: I'm trying but you're losing a lot of blood.