Vivienne: So I need to tell you about my night last night.
Paxxx: Oh, tell me all about it...
Vivienne: So I'm hanging out in my apartment. I've got some candles lit. I'm feeling good. I've had 8 glasses of wine.
Vivienne: And down in the street I hear these two beautiful boys playing, they're doing magic, or playing with fire or something, and one of them looks up at me and has the most beautiful face I've ever seen. Dwarven.
Vivienne: And you know how I like a little dwarf, you remember my date with Blackbeak.
Vivienne: The point is, I say, "Woo hoo, boys" and they sort of look. The one who isn't dwarven, is a half-orc.
Paxxx: You don't have to- this could be a colorblind story.
Vivienne: I wanna fill it with color.
Paxxx: Yeah but I'm just saying. It's like, there's a race problem in the senate right now-
Vivienne: And in Rome. A race-ISM problem.
Vivienne: Well this story isn't racist, it's diverse. If everyone in it was human, then it would be racist, Paxxx.
Paxxx: You know what, you're right. Go ahead.
Vivienne: So the boys come up to my apartment and I'm wearing my cape. I'm ONLY wearing my cape. And I say "why don't you come in my boudoir and watch me do a monologue," and they say "where's the bed," and I say "this is the bed right here," and they say, "can we sit on the bed?" and I say "sure, but these are expensive Chinese Linen," and they say, "but they're not even soft."
Vivienne: And I say, "Sometimes... things that are expensive... are worse."
Vivienne: So anyway I sucked both their dicks.
Paxxx: Did you do the monologue?
Vivienne: I did an early work by the master.
Paxxx and Vivienne: Homer.
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