Incorrect Riverdale Quotes

All totally canon quotes from CW's Riverdale. If you have a quote you want to send in, feel free to do so! Main blog: @hope-lizzie

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Jughead: I know we don’t like each other and you think of me as a boring, sheltered nobody.

Reggie: I don’t think of you.

Jughead: Right. Of course you don’t. But I’ve been thinking of me. And I have come to the conclusion that I need to get out of my comfort zone. I need to experience new things.

Reggie: Are you gay?

Jughead: Now that would be out of my comfort zone, but no. I just need to get out of Riverdale. For one night. I’d like to experience the world of Reggie Mantle.

Reggie: You’re lucky I’m bored.

Jughead: Is that a yes?

Reggie: Get in before I change my mind.

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Veronica: Obviously you miss each other.

......

Veronica: I’ll take that awkward pause as a yes.

Jughead: Don’t think this means that I’ve been calling out your name in my sleep.

Archie: It’s not like I’ve been writing Mrs. Jughead Jones in my notebook.

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Veronica: I'm gonna give it to you straight.

Kevin, under his breath: Gross.

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Reggie: *stabbing Jughead* I realize I'm technically penetrating you right now, but it's not gay if it's revenge!

Jughead: *bleeding out* Really? This is the hill you want to die on?

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Jughead: Oh, yeah? Can you picture me telling our kid ‘Go to your room! You’re grounded!’

Betty: Can you picture me saying you’re grounded?

Jughead: You said that to me last week.

Betty: Well, how hard is it, Jughead? No shoes on the furniture!

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I just like making people feel uncomfortable. It makes me feel better for some reason.

Hiram, at some point, probably

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Jughead: If things go wrong, I just want you to know...

Archie: If you're gonna say that you've always been secretly gay for me, everyone just kind of assumed it.

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Cheryl: I love you!

Toni: I love you more!

Cheryl: Don’t start a battle you can’t win.

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We did it, Betty! We saved the city!

Veronica, while Riverdale is on fire

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Fred: You have no idea what I'm capable of!

Hiram: Don't take this personally, but I feel like I'm being threatened by a cupcake.

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FP: Look, Fred, if there was one thing that stood between you and happiness, don't you think I would be there to help you get it? No matter how stupid it was?

Fred: You're right, FP. If I was doing something stupid, you definitely would be involved.

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Veronica: When's the last time anything went according to plan?

Betty: I don't think there was a last time.

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Reggie: I saw the most beautiful woman outside today.

Archie: That's impossible, Veronica has been in here all day.

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Cheryl: You are not gonna cock out on me.

Kevin: Cock out?

Cheryl: I’d say pussy, but let’s be honest. Which one is tougher?

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Archie: We have to find the person responsible STAT! It could be anyone!

Jughead: Archie, it's Hiram. I mean, come on, it's always Hiram.

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Veronica: I have an excellent gaydar™ I can determine if a person is gay or not with just a glance.

Betty: I’ve been in love with you for years.

Veronica: You’ve what?

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FP: So, you two got kicked out of the movies. What for?

Betty: We were yelling diving scores during the Titanic as people jumped off the boat.

Jughead: That last guy had a solid eight, let me tell you.