Drugs are my only escape from a world where nothing ever seems to get better.
-Was physically abused by my parents (mother in particular) for as long as I can remember up until age thirteen after i threatened to call the police. -Was verbally abused until I couldn’t deal with it anymore and had to leave home at eighteen. -Started cutting at age thirteen to cope. -Had two suicide attempts at age fourteen and fifteen. -So horribly bullied at school I had to drop out. -Got pregnant at sixteen. -Had a miscarriage and had to deal with losing my child. -Was cheated on many times by the only person to ever really make me feel loved. -Was given so much shit for the guy I was with and lost almost every one of my friends. -Was given MDMA for the first time in october. On it every weekend, high on weed almost every night. Drugs are my only escape from a world where nothing ever seems to get better. I want so badly for someone to notice. For someone to realise that I’m on a slippery slope into a dangerous spiral. I need to be saved, but no one notices, and even if they did, who would care? I have manic depression. I’ve tried so hard to get through everything, to keep it all to myself, to cope with it. But then I found drugs, and then I gave up. Why should I continue to be strong? I don’t see things getting any easier anytime soon. Why be strong when you can be high? This is not an attention seeking post, I know no one will read it, let alone respond. It’s just my silent cry for help so I can say ‘at least I tried’.