so profoundly sad

Ingrid Sullivan; AHS: Asylum OC. (60's timeline) Orphan with no ties to the outside world. Manic depressive, violent tendancies. Despite all of this I'm a nice girl, I swear. Talk to me. some posts could be nsfw/triggering. I'll try to tag as best as I can.

[pictureofsorrow]

inmateingrid started following you

[pictureofsorrow]

He smiled, and reached for her cheek. He let his thumb trace the tear away, his expression soft. “Don’t thank me. This place is almost hell. I want to make it better. That’s what I’m here for.” he tilted a smile at her. “Memories or no memories. I just wish I had them for … I don’t know, the stories. I think all of us could use a little sun and sand around here.”

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ingrid smiled back at him. "It couldn't get much worse," she said, nodding softly. It wasn't a very comforting thought, but there were few comforts at Briarcliff, with the exception of the occasional cigarette. At least they each got their own rooms. Ingrid felt very tired all of a sudden, leaning her head against the wall.    

"I don't suppose you have any idea what time it is?" 

[fyeahjessicabrownfindlay]

(x)

[pictureofsorrow]

inmateingrid started following you

[pictureofsorrow]

Leo nodded with a small quirk at the corner of his mouth. “Photographer, actually. I think from …LA maybe? Someplace warm. And there was lots of sun.” he sighed, and flicked his own cigarette. “I miss it. And I miss my camera. I must have lived my life through the thing…I don’t feel whole without one in my hands, you know?”

[inmateingrid-blog]

She raised her eyebrows at him. “Well. Quite a change for you, then.” Her blue eyes scanned the dim grey walls of Briarcliff for a moment, thinking of the contrast of the hot white sun. She turned her gaze back to him. “Photography? Nice,” she said with a small smile. 

She brought her legs up to her chest, wrapping her arms around her knees. “Sounds like you had quite the life.” 

[pictureofsorrow]

“Probably.” he agreed with a nod. “I only regret I don’t remember more than that. What I get… I get in my dreams.” he sighed. ” What few actual good dreams I have.”

He put the cigarette to his lips again, and took a long draw, trying to remember  Something, anything. But it was the same as it had always been. A woman laughing, sunlight. Then, dark crumbling halls. Leo was running. And there was a white hot fire in his arm and the whole world came tumbling down on him. And then white again. Like a mist, a haze across his mind. Voices whispering something, and when he’d blinked his eyes open, Sister Eunice, hovering above his bed. 

Welcome to Briarcliff…

His attention was drawn back to her now, because she was hugging his knees. He extinguished his cigarette, and then leaned forward, taking her hands again. 

“You’re not alone in this. None of you are. I promise.”

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ingrid wondered if Leo had been so kind in his past life. Probably. She sighed, smiling weakly at him. Her hands felt so small inside of his. She felt overcome with emotion for a moment, tears welling in her eyes. Distracted, she let it fall down her cheek... and the moment passed. 

"Thank you, Leo... for being so kind. I mean it, really." She smiled at him, but the smile was sad. "I hope you can get your memory back." 

[inmateingrid-blog]

nursekatedobric started following you

[offtoxxtheraces-deactivated2018]

That fact that the nun had told a patient such a thing bothered the nurse. Of course, a lot about Sister Mary Eunice bothered Kate. She had never feared someone such as she did that young nun. It was the oddest thing to her mind, but she could not deny it. Their meetings had been nothing but threatening games in which Kate had felt hopeless, and knew she was destined to lose whatever was at stake. The fact that she would give no kind words to a new patient didn’t surprise her anymore. 

“I wouldn’t listen to her, she may be in charge now, but she doesn’t work with the health of the patients as one-on-one as we underlings do,” Kate tried to sound positive, hoping this would brighten things for the girl. “Some don’t leave, sadly, because they have no where else to go. Some don’t leave because the law says they can’t. Yet plenty do recover, if what they have is treatable. I would say that you’re treatable, Ingrid. If you want to get better, you can. It depends largely on you, as well.” 

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ingrid nodded at Kate’s words. A slight change in her soft voice as she spoke of the strange nun. Ingrid suppressed a smile. Not even the nurses trust her. Luckily, Ingrid wasn’t court-ordered to Briarcliff, as some were, so there was a chance of being released. 

“I think I can be treated… it’s just, other than you, and Dr. Thredson, who I haven’t yet met, are the only ones who are really qualified to help. I don’t know what any nun is going to do,” she said bitterly, a bad mood beginning to take hold of her. She rolled her eyes. “Nothing about this place makes any sense.” 

[offtoxxtheraces-deactivated2018]

It was funny, how often the patients seemed to reflect her own thoughts and feelings. Kate wasn’t sure if it was because she had spent far too much time here and was beginning to think like a inmate, or if indeed the ‘insane’ were far more sane than most realized. She had a strong feeling it was the latter. “I know what you mean, for the most part. However, the nuns do basic services and help run things around here. And for some patients, there is a spiritual need as well. It can help. Besides,” Kate paused, as she had realized this a long time ago. “If it weren’t for the Church, there might not be many places like this at all.” She thought of the other asylum she had worked at. It had been closed. Indeed, the Monsignor in having Briarcliff was doing a great service. It was better here than the streets for those who truly needed help. The thought of the priest brought a smile to her lips for just a moment, but she pushed the thoughts away. 

“Sometimes it doesn’t make sense,” She nodded in agreement. “I think of it as just something that you have to get through. Yes, even me, in working here. Take it a day at a time. It helps.” 

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ingrid supposed Kate was right, but it didn't exactly change her mind. "That's probably true, actually." Briarcliff did take in many people who simply had nowhere else to go, and she was one of them. She chided herself for not having more sympathy. 

"Thank you for the advice," Ingrid said with a sorry excuse for a smile. Kate was a professional... unlike most people here.

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ingrid saw the boy’s eyes wandering the common room, before settling on the cigarette in her hand. She stared at him a moment; he was oblivious to her, his eyes fixed on the smoke trailing out of the cigarette. She wandered over, sitting beside him. “Want a puff?” She whispered, offering it to him.

[briartate-blog]

Zombie like, Tate nodded his head, taking the cigarette from the kind woman. Hands shaking, he brought it to his lips, inhaled, careful not to choke it down. In this world, cigarettes were a rarity, and if one was so inclined to share, it was common courtesy to only take what you needed. Letting the smoke roll around in his throat for a moment, he expelled the hot tobacco, returning the stick to its rightful owner.

“Thanks, what’s the catch? I got like, nothing to trade, I’m kind of new.” He shrugged, shooting her an apologetic glance. “Name’s Tate, by the way.”

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ingrid watched the boy inhale. Tate, he'd said his name was. She shook her head, smiling. "There's no catch. I'm kind of new, too, actually." She looked at him a moment, then extented her hand. "I'm Ingrid," she said, smiling slightly. "Wh-" a scream interrupted her question. Two men had gotten into a fist fight, and most of the inmates crowded around to watch, until the orderlies ran in to take them back to their cells. She glanced at Tate wide eyed, before giggling quietly to herself. "Welcome to Briarcliff."

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ingrid eyed the nun before smiling politely. The other inmates had whispered plenty of things about Sister Mary, things Ingrid was not sure she believed. “I’m Ingrid, I’m new.” She said quietly, studying the nun’s face. She seemed perfectly pleasant, not cruel like the others said, but Ingrid remained wary.

[justasimplenun-deactivated20130]

“Yes, I can see that,” the nun eyed the girl in front of her with sickly sweetness, offering her the widest of smirks yet her eyes… her emerald eyes gleamed maliciously, as do all things beautiful which have been corrupted by a touch of evil. A very powerful and dark touch of evil. “And I can also see that it is past your bed time, Ingrid. What a naughty girl,” she shook her head, grabbing the girl’s elbow gently and turning her around, guiding her back to the direction in which she had come from.

“Back to bed we go.” 

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ah. There it was. The nun smiled pleasantly enough, but there was just a touch of something else there, of something sinister. Her grip on Ingrid's elbow was gentle, but for just a moment, her nails dug into the flesh. Ingrid suppressed a grimace, collected herslef, and turned to face the blonde nun. 

"Of course. I'm sorry, Sister Mary. Off I go," Ingrid said, smirking as she turned away. 

[pictureofsorrow]

inmateingrid started following you

[pictureofsorrow]

Leo nodded with a small quirk at the corner of his mouth. “Photographer, actually. I think from …LA maybe? Someplace warm. And there was lots of sun.” he sighed, and flicked his own cigarette. “I miss it. And I miss my camera. I must have lived my life through the thing…I don’t feel whole without one in my hands, you know?”

[inmateingrid-blog]

She raised her eyebrows at him. "Well. Quite a change for you, then." Her blue eyes scanned the dim grey walls of Briarcliff for a moment, thinking of the contrast of the hot white sun. She turned her gaze back to him. "Photography? Nice," she said with a small smile. 

She brought her legs up to her chest, wrapping her arms around her knees. "Sounds like you had quite the life." 

[cappingmisfits]

[pictureofsorrow]

inmateingrid started following you

[pictureofsorrow]

“There is. We’ll find it. We can figure this thing out… you and me. Some of the others, maybe.”

Leo leaned forward  then, dropping his voice in a whisper. “I’ve talked with some of them. Not all of them are… not all of them should be here. We can get out of here…but. We need a plan. We need to figure this place out…”

Leo’s voice dropped suddenly as a nun passed. He took a long drag off his cigarette, waiting for her to get out of earshot, before he continued. 

“I won’t leave them in here. I’ll help. To get us all out of here, I’ll help. But not unless we take as many as we can with us. We’ll need all the extra hands we can get.”

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ingrid nodded quickly as he spoke. “I haven’t really talked to anyone but you,” she confessed. She was afraid of most of the others, but she didn’t want to tell him that. 

“Who else… do you want to take?” She asked. She needed to know who she could trust, and though she barely knew him, and he certainly didn’t know her, she did trust Leo. He was kind to her, and he didn’t have to be. 

[pictureofsorrow]

Leo considered for a moment. “Shelly-she needs to come. She doesn’t belong here. Callie-her too, she’s not sick. Neither of them are.”

Leo sucked in a breath, and looked thoughtful for a moment. “And the other woman—Lana. I don’t think she belongs here, either. I heard she was a reporter, like I used to be. If you’re right… if they took my memory…it’ll only be a matter of time before they take hers too. Or worse, depending on what she knows…”

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ingrid was relieved. She had seen Shelly, Callie and Lana around, and she was not afraid of any of them. "Alright. I think I know them," she said, taking another drag of her cigarette. She flicked the ashes to the cold floor, rubbing them into the ground with her thumb. It burned a little, but she relished the feeling. 

She looked up at him, smiling shyly. "You were a reporter?" 

[pictureofsorrow]

inmateingrid started following you

[pictureofsorrow]

“There is. We’ll find it. We can figure this thing out… you and me. Some of the others, maybe.”

Leo leaned forward  then, dropping his voice in a whisper. “I’ve talked with some of them. Not all of them are… not all of them should be here. We can get out of here…but. We need a plan. We need to figure this place out…”

Leo’s voice dropped suddenly as a nun passed. He took a long drag off his cigarette, waiting for her to get out of earshot, before he continued. 

“I won’t leave them in here. I’ll help. To get us all out of here, I’ll help. But not unless we take as many as we can with us. We’ll need all the extra hands we can get.”

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ingrid nodded quickly as he spoke. "I haven't really talked to anyone but you," she confessed. She was afraid of most of the others, but she didn't want to tell him that. 

"Who else... do you want to take?" She asked. She needed to know who she could trust, and though she barely knew him, and he certainly didn't know her, she did trust Leo. He was kind to her, and he didn't have to be. 

[cappingmisfits]

[pictureofsorrow]

inmateingrid started following you

[pictureofsorrow]

“… Remember…? Magic trick?” Leo’s confused expression only deepened. His eyes danced over her face before  a minute, before his head fell back again. 

Leo chuckled. 

” Oh… man. Oh man.  I knew I was crazy. I knew there had to be a reason I was stuck here …”

[inmateingrid-blog]

“Well, whatever you did, it worked. It’s gone now, but you did do something.” She smirked at him, but she was annoyed. She leaned back against the wall, folding her arms. “I barely know anything about you,” she sighed, looking at him. 

“Other than the fact that you’re some kind of magician.” She rolled her eyes. “So?”

[pictureofsorrow]

“Uh… so?” Leo shook his head. It seemed like by now he’d told the story to a lot of people. It never changed. It made him tired, hearing it repeated over and over and over again. Dispirited, almost. 

” I wish I had something to tell you. Anything.” he made a helpless gesture. “I woke up one morning and I was here. And no one seems to want to tell me why, or how I got here. I have bad dreams. That’s my official diagnoses. But I never knew having bad dreams could land you in a place like this.”

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ingrid stared at him a moment, not saying anything. “Do you smoke?” she finally asked, extending her hand, a cigarette dangling between her thin fingers. 

“So, you don’t remember a thing before Briarcliff.” She raised an eyebrow. Poor Leo. He was one of the few people who had been kind to her since her arrival. “What if… what if they took your memory, or something?” She’d heard tales of Dr. Arden’s unorthodox medical experiments…

[pictureofsorrow]

Leo took the offered cigarette with a grateful smile. ” I do since I came here. Don’t know if I did before… “

He fished in his pocket for his book of matches and struck one, and then held the still smouldering match out in an offer to her as well. 

“Took my…can they do that?!” Leo couldn’t keep the shocked look off his face. He’d never heard of anything like that, but then, this place was creepy, and whispers often went up and down the hall that one of the doctors had been a former Nazi. That didn’t bode well, for anyone. 

[inmateingrid-blog]

She leaned forward, lighting her cigarette with his match. She leaned back inhaling. "Probably," she sighed. "This place is fucked up. I bet there's a lot more they can do, too." She shivered a little at the thought. "I don't trust any of the doctors, and especially not the nuns." She felt tears welling in her eyes, but she wouldn't let them fall. She looked at him, eyes shimmering with tears in the dark. "There has to be some way out." 

[demonfae-deactivated20140208]

Send a ✿ if you would ship your character with mine.

[briartate-blog]

Tate had never been much of a smoker before he was dumped at Briarcliff—a cigarette here, a few puffs behind the football bleachers, but he never craved the harsh smoke, not like he did now. For lack of better reasoning, there was simply nothing better to do in the hellhole than to suck on the chemical sticks, and the need for a nicotine fix was creeping up on the blonde, more than he was able to stave off. He anxiously let his eyes wander through the common room, hoping someone would drop a pack, or even a wasted butt he could hold in his mouth.

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ingrid saw the boy's eyes wandering the common room, before settling on the cigarette in her hand. She stared at him a moment; he was oblivious to her, his eyes fixed on the smoke trailing out of the cigarette. She wandered over, sitting beside him. "Want a puff?" She whispered, offering it to him.

[justasimplenun-deactivated20130]

inmateingrid approached us. 

Welcome to Briarcliff. I’m Sister Mary; how may I help?

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ingrid eyed the nun before smiling politely. The other inmates had whispered plenty of things about Sister Mary, things Ingrid was not sure she believed. "I'm Ingrid, I'm new." She said quietly, studying the nun's face. She seemed perfectly pleasant, not cruel like the others said, but Ingrid remained wary.

[pictureofsorrow]

inmateingrid started following you

[pictureofsorrow]

“… Remember…? Magic trick?” Leo’s confused expression only deepened. His eyes danced over her face before  a minute, before his head fell back again. 

Leo chuckled. 

” Oh… man. Oh man.  I knew I was crazy. I knew there had to be a reason I was stuck here …”

[inmateingrid-blog]

“Well, whatever you did, it worked. It’s gone now, but you did do something.” She smirked at him, but she was annoyed. She leaned back against the wall, folding her arms. “I barely know anything about you,” she sighed, looking at him. 

“Other than the fact that you’re some kind of magician.” She rolled her eyes. “So?”

[pictureofsorrow]

“Uh… so?” Leo shook his head. It seemed like by now he’d told the story to a lot of people. It never changed. It made him tired, hearing it repeated over and over and over again. Dispirited, almost. 

” I wish I had something to tell you. Anything.” he made a helpless gesture. “I woke up one morning and I was here. And no one seems to want to tell me why, or how I got here. I have bad dreams. That’s my official diagnoses. But I never knew having bad dreams could land you in a place like this.”

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ingrid stared at him a moment, not saying anything. "Do you smoke?" she finally asked, extending her hand, a cigarette dangling between her thin fingers. 

"So, you don't remember a thing before Briarcliff." She raised an eyebrow. Poor Leo. He was one of the few people who had been kind to her since her arrival. "What if... what if they took your memory, or something?" She'd heard tales of Dr. Arden's unorthodox medical experiments...

[pictureofsorrow]

inmateingrid started following you

[pictureofsorrow]

“… Remember…? Magic trick?” Leo’s confused expression only deepened. His eyes danced over her face before  a minute, before his head fell back again. 

Leo chuckled. 

” Oh… man. Oh man.  I knew I was crazy. I knew there had to be a reason I was stuck here …”

[inmateingrid-blog]

“Well, whatever you did, it worked. It’s gone now, but you did do something.” She smirked at him, but she was annoyed. She leaned back against the wall, folding her arms. “I barely know anything about you,” she sighed, looking at him. 

“Other than the fact that you’re some kind of magician.” She rolled her eyes. “So?”

[pictureofsorrow]

“Uh… so?” Leo shook his head. It seemed like by now he’d told the story to a lot of people. It never changed. It made him tired, hearing it repeated over and over and over again. Dispirited, almost. 

” I wish I had something to tell you. Anything.” he made a helpless gesture. “I woke up one morning and I was here. And no one seems to want to tell me why, or how I got here. I have bad dreams. That’s my official diagnoses. But I never knew having bad dreams could land you in a place like this.”

[inmateingrid-blog]

Ingrid smiled sadly at Leo, offering him her cigarette. "Sorry," she whispered, leaning her head back against the wall, looking at the ceiling. "You don't remember anything about your life? Before this hell hole?" 

She inhaled, keeping the smoke in her mouth a moment before exhaling, her mouth a small o. "Not a thing?"