@insertcreative-namehere - Tumblr Blog

Idk if you will ever see this but i know i will still feel the same no matter when you do. I hope you’re doing well and I miss you.

Hey, idk when you’ll see this but I wanna start over really badly. I wanna try us again. You’re my best friend and I think we can do better than last time. I hope you’re doing well! I also hope I can help make your life better soon

I saw your post on Twitter about having a really rough day. I wasn’t sure if I should reach out so I figure I’d leave it here. I’m sorry you had a rough day, there are gonna be so many good ones ahead just remember that!! I saw you got a job at Ascension! Congrats!!! That’s so awesome!!! I’m really happy for you and i hope it goes great:) I’m here if you need me! I hope tomorrow is better sunshine!

10/15

I would give so much just to talk with you soon:/ idk if I should even be writing on here to you, but ifk what else to do. I still love you sunshine and I hope you find happiness.

I wish I could just talk with you more than anything. I miss you telling me everything about your day and hearing your thoughts on it. I just hate how everything is right now:/ idk what to do or if there is even anything I could do. Just know that I miss you like crazy. I hope you’re doing well. I still think about you everyday:/

10/3

thegoodvybe

I want to go back so badly. And yes I do miss you really badly. Ever since you stopped talking to me I’ve realized it more and more how much I need you in my life in any way. I wish I could just hold your hand and hopefully everything would be alright.

10/1/19

I really miss us tonight.

10/1/19

I still need you in my life, even if it takes a while. I want you in my life. You are still my favorite person and my best friend. I hope one day we can continue that😔

I can’t just say I’m sorry, I have to be better with my actions.

I wish I would’ve looked at tumblr sooner. Idk what life is anymore. I wish I could go back and change so many things. I just wanna go back a year and be happy again. Why did everything happen the way it did? The last 7 months have felt like a dream that I can’t wake up from and I hate it so fucking much! If you do see this, just know I’m so sorry and that I wish I could take all the pain in your life, especially everything i caused.

I promise I’m not like the rest, But idk if that’s a good or bad thing.

I did see it. And idk if you’ll see this but I hate myself for everything I’ve ever done to you. You deserve the world. Idk if this is my last night but it’s been a thought going through my head lately. I can’t live with knowing how much i have hurt you and the failure I’ve become. All I do is let people down and I can’t take it anymore. Sometimes I think the world would be better without me. I’m not looking for your sympathy. Part of me has tried to push you away or make you hate me so that if something ever did happen, You wouldn’t feel as bad. I know this sounds crazy but idk. You still are the best person in my life and the best thing to ever happen to me. I wish I wasn’t like this and could make you happy like I want you to be. I just want you to be so damn happy. Fuck I just wanna see your beautiful smile brighten up everyone’s day! I still want you to have the best life you could ever have. I want the best for you! You’re one of the few people is till care about. And I’m so sorry for everything. Idk how long I’ll keep this on here but if you do see this, just know that I love you so much and I just want you to keep being the amazing person you are. You’ll always be the sunshine to brighten my day when nothing else could.

Tuesday, June 25th

Why are we trapped in our own heads?

Brains are crazy. It's just electrical impulses and chemical reactions. But it's our whole lives and everything around us. How does one imbalance in a chemical differentiate me being the happiest I'll ever be to me being depressed and feeling like everything is falling apart. Brains are supposed to be adaptable. Why does my brain do this to me? Does it not know that it's destroying itself? That makes me think brains are dumb. Even though I am just a brain with a body around it. So I'm the dumb one. Maybe that's why I'm depressed. Can I control it then? Idk I haven't ever been able to control much in my life. I feel like I've always been told what to do or told what I am. Yeah I am a failure by your standards but what about my standards? I got out of bed today and studied for hours for a dumb class. That's an accomplishment in my book. I feel myself going back into the abyss. I am losing grip of the wall I have been climbing. I've been climbing for months. Steady progress. Less fake smiles, more real laughter. However lately I've been bringing back those forced smiles. Wiping away more hidden tears. I'm too ashamed to say I'm going back. I'm too ashamed because I'm not strong enough. I've never been the strong one. I haven't even had a hard life but anything bad that happens just wrecks me. How the hell am I supposed to make it through life like that. I started writing this at 11:15 am because I was having a panic attack. It is now 12:30 and I just want to sleep forever.

samxcamargo

It had nothing to do with you. You are enough and you always were enough. He had covered his heart with ice, numbed himself. How could he feel love for you.. when he couldn’t even for himself?

Samantha Camargo

hplyrikz

“I need a life that isn’t just about needing to escape my life.”

— Robert Polito (via hplyrikz)

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