Institute for Cryptobiology

University of Roya // Pop-Science Communications Office // Unreality

[infertilityidol]

[valdevia]

Explosive Blooms take place after the Sporothrix fragoris yeast fully takes over the soft tissues of the body, silently saturating them with spores over years.

Blooms tend to trigger under windy weather, often resulting in the death of the subject and the rapid spread of the infection.

[valdevia]

Deadly fungal storms are now sweeping the US – and spreading a disease few doctors recognise | BBC Science Focus Magazine

As the US dries out, giant storms of dust are becoming increasingly common across the southwest

IT HAPPENED AGAIN THEY MADE MY ART REAL

[memorycycle]

genius. it creates energy clones of itself to gather resources, while the main body stays alert and safe. and if i attack, it can simply swap bodies with one of its clones

[dajo42]

i work at the observatory. two nights ago i discovered two new stars quite close together. i noted their positions. last night they were gone. i trust my notation was accurate. i know they were there. im a woman of science and i find it hard to believe they simply vanished. especially as tonight as i lay here and gaze wide eyed unblinking at my ceiling they are staring back

[valdevia]

In 1952, an abandoned shrine was found in the Wakayama prefecture of rural Japan. This temple, known as Rabu Shrine (羅父神宮), appeared in old Edo period maps, but was incorrectly believed to have burned down a century prior. The government undertook a survey, identifying signs of occupation dating as late as the 1920s. The following documents, including a set of postcards and manuscripts written by the young priest Sōkū (桑空), were recovered at the site:

ル祀ミ育神蟲テニ宮神父羅 (At Rabu Shrine, the insect God is raised and worshipped.)

“O Spirits, why must you test our faith so? The Child Shinchū has absorbed one more of us today, yet she will not transform into a God. The elder priest Tōji says we must keep waiting. That the Child still hungers. That the more she takes in, the more divine she will become. And yet, nineteen people has she taken into itself and her shell will not harden. She only grows larger, hungrier.”

ム慰ヲ神キナケワイニ弦管ガモド侶僧ノ宮神父羅 (The Priests at Rabu Shrine soothe the young God with music.) Priest Sōkū pictured left.

“The older faithful of the shrine still remember the elder siblings of Shinchū, and how simple it was to help them grow. A single soul would often suffice, and the union would transform them into beautiful Gods in the shape of scarabs, butterflies, and bees. Yet the Child refuses her ascension, and our numbers dwindle. Her Father does not guide us, blind as he is in his old age. I fear that life is fading beneath his shell, and his spirit readies to depart.”

神ルケ生ノメタガラ我テニ宮神父羅 (Rabu Shrine's Sacred Father, a God living amongst us.)

“Many of the faithful have left the shrine. They feel fear in their hearts that they will be chosen next, absorbed into the Child fruitlessly; they feel anger towards the young God who will not grow, all the while taking their loved ones. They say the disappearances will cause suspicion, that someone will discover the secret of our shrine and, filled with envy, will kill Shinchū’s young siblings, who are yet unready to ascend.”

リ侍チ育ニカヤ健デ池産ノ宮神父羅ハ子ノ神 (The God Children grow healthy in the Rabu Shrine purification pond.)

“There are only three of us left. Those who lost their faith have reneged their vows and left the temple. The rest of us, who remain devout in our worship, have continued uniting with the Child to no avail. Today, it was Tōji’s turn to read his fortune in the Omikuji, and he was awarded the Great Blessing of becoming one with the Child. But he would not accept it. He attempted to flee, leaving his Omikuji tied in the temple lest fate follow him. It took the three of us to bring him back and force him within Shinchū’s soft shell. We pray he may be the last. The faithful need hope to come back.”

羅父神社の羅父神はきみを御子と共に神になるやう選ばれき 共に生ける神となり御子のうちいづるほどわたりはきみを崇拝せむ (GREAT BLESSING: The Sacred Father of Rabu Shrine has chosen you to become a God with His Child. Together, you will become a Living God and live an eternal blissful life, and the people of Rabu Shrine will worship your new name.)

“I am the last one here. Day after day, the Omikuji spares me of the Great Blessing. I feel weary, and my faith is fading. Is the Shinchū really the God they promised? Or is she a demon, using our faith to trick us into feeding her? The Father has stopped moving, and her younger siblings grow weak without our care. I have found myself alone with her. Watching after her does not comfort me as it once did. I have decided to read only one more Omikuji. Let my fate be decided.”

At the time of its discovery, most of the shrine had fallen into ruin as the wooden beams rotted in the humid climate. A single structure was still standing, containing some of the temple’s statues and treasures. Today, only these documents and several photos from the 1952 survey remain.

Read the full Megalomorpha Series Omikuji drawings, Japanese text and writing help by Nao70Shark

[armadillorollup]

biology of a stapler

[armadillorollup]

some more speculative staplings

[institute-for-cryptobiology]

The domestication of an animal species is a process that takes thousands of years, and binds that animal irrevocably to its human companions. It is a process that has taken place only a few dozen times over the course of human history, and most species that have once been domesticated are still familiar to us today. 

There is only a handful of extinct domesticated animals, and in most of these cases the extermination of a domesticated species was part of a genocide against the people that domesticated it. While in some cases this was very much planned and deliberately executed, for example in the case of the Fuegian dog, in other cases it might have merely been a byproduct of the destruction of the culture that domesticated a species. 

One little-known example for that latter case is the Minoan hyena. 

The Minoan civilization, occasionally dubbed Europe's first civilization, was a flourishing Bronze Age civilization native to the modern Greek island of Crete. In modern pop culture it is primarily connected to the myth of the minotaur, but there is much more to it. Its writing is untranslated to date, but surviving art tells of a perhaps matriarchal society that built grand and labyrinthine palaces. 

It also tells us of the Minoans’ animal companions. When the first Minoan artefacts were identified as such, archeologists noticed what was first assumed to be an odd kind of dog in many of the portrayals of priestesses. 

These supposed dogs had the size of German shepherds, flat and broad heads, and unusually long necks. They were dark brown in color, with patches of darker and brighter fur throughout. 

It wasn't until the carcass of one of these animals was found with the skeletal remains of a Minoan priestess excavated in Armenoi that the strange Minoan dog was revealed to be a strange Minoan hyena after all, specifically a previously unknown subspecies of the spotted hyena. 

This first specimen, as well as many more, had been buried wrapped in a richly painted dress and decorated with gold jewelry. 

The Minoan hyena showed uncharacteristically floppy ears instead of the upright ears of the spotted hyena, and white spots as well as the typical black ones. Both features have been observed to arise in various domestic mammals, likely due to pleiotropy (essentially side effects of genes that are otherwise helpful to the domestication). 

It is assumed that Minoan hyenas lived in a similar relationship with the Minoans as dogs do, although this is far from certain. In the wild, the social structures of packs of sported hyenas are significantly more complex than those of wolves, and there is much more competition within. 

An important detail to note here is that Minoan hyenas only ever appear alongside priestesses. It is possible - although, again, far from certain - that the raising and keeping of hyenas was exclusive to an elite group of priestesses, who would take the role of the dominant female of a hyena pack, and, if necessary, wrestle her ‘packmates’ to maintain that status. 

This would, additionally, fit well with the respective social structures: although we can not say with absolute certainty that Minoan society was matriarchal in nature, archeological finds support that theory. Likewise, spotted hyenas live in matriarchal packs. It seems obvious that this might have been a factor in the adoption of the hyena as a companion animal. 

The Minoan hyena disappears from the historical record with the downfall of Minoan culture itself. As it is uncertain how that downfall happened, it is hard to say for sure how the hyena vanished. It seems that at least part of the reason was an invasion by the Mycenaean culture and the subsequent assimilation of the Minoans. 

In a society in which there were no more Minoan priestesses, no Minoan hyenas were raised. It is almost certain that a certain feral population survived initially, but was over time either killed off to protect livestock and population, or perished without the care of its old masters. 

[institute-for-cryptobiology]

The African false hamster is a species of flightless bird widespread in subsaharan Africa. It is in size and shape similar to actual hamsters, with a very short beak that is hidden beneath its fluffy coat of feathers. Its short but robust legs are likewise invisible beneath its feathers, and with its hasty, skittering movement it is easy to mistake the bipedal bird for a quadrupedal rodent.

False hamsters are omnivores, although their diet contains at least fifty to eighty percent meat and bone. Their short beaks and legs make it hard for false hamsters to dig for grubs and worms, but they are rapid runners and excellent hunters. False hunters primarily prey on arthropods, but have been observed chasing down, killing, and eating lizards and rodents as tall as themselves. Another large part of their diet is carrion.

The false hamsters’ closest living relatives are New Zealand’s kiwis, with both of them most closely related to the extinct Malagasy elephant birds. While originally only native to South Africa’s Bushveld, false hamsters were introduced to other parts of rural Africa as pest control: false hamsters prey on locusts and rodents that might otherwise damage crop yields or food stockpiles.

Inhabitants of regions into which false hamsters were introduced often complain about the noise: as part of their mating displays, males will often demonstrate their virility through exceptionally loud vocal utterances. Their sounds are frequently described as disturbing, and are closer to pig squeals than birdsong.

False hamsters are frequently prepared as food. They are often cooked and eaten whole, but their fatty, tart meat is also a component of many stews. 

There have been attempts to introduce false hamsters into further environments, which mostly failed because of the birds’ exceptionally low intelligence. In less rural environments, cars pose an enormous danger to false hamsters, as does plastic garbage. 

In 2013, a false hamster carcass was found in the sewer system of Nairobi. It measured an enormous twenty centimeters in width, and upon dissection was revealed to have ingested more than twice its own body weight in plastic. 

[institute-for-cryptobiology]

If you have never personally interacted with a tapir, you probably conceive of them as placid, careful animals that run away and hide at the slightest sign of danger It may surprise you to learn that, if threatened, they are fierce fighters well capable of defending themselves against and even dismembering humans. 

The four extant species of tapir are medium sized grazers that primarily inhabit forest biomes but prefer close proximity to bodies of water. All of them are threatened by habitat loss caused by human influence, and are generally perceived as shy and elusive. 

Until 1892, however, there was a fifth species of tapir, one with a very different reputation. 

The wetland tapir (tapirus floridensis) was a species of tapir endemic to the wetlands of the North American south east, with the largest population living in Florida's Everglades. Colloquially, it was also known as ‘mud bear’. 

Driven by the evolutionary pressure exerted on it by the abundance of predators, primarily crocodilians, the wetland tapir grew to significantly larger sizes than its extant relatives, with size and built more similar to its cousin, the rhinoceros. Furthermore, wetland tapirs had longer canine teeth than other tapirs, allowing them to pierce the crocodilians’ natural armor.

In appearance, wetland tapirs were similar to the extant malayan tapirs, with a massive body supported by slender legs with hoofed toes. They lacked the black-white color pattern of the malayan tapirs, and were entirely black instead. 

Wetland tapirs were exclusive herbivores. Due to their size, they consumed enormous amounts of plant matter each day. They spent even more time in the water than other tapirs, and primarily grazed on the sawgrass and algae growing in submerged parts of their habitat. 

As most tapirs, wetland tapirs were generally solitary, but assembled into groups for childrearing. During this time, wetland tapirs became very defensive of their territory, often charging perceived threats directly upon the smallest provocation. 

When European invaders first entered the Everglades, they found large mounds of rotting carcasses, both human and animal, strewn with feces. They assumed, in their usual racist fashion, that this was the work of particularly savage indigenous peoples, but they were wrong. 

What they had actually found were charnel mounds constructed by groups of wetland tapirs: when the tapirs killed possible threats, they would drag the carcasses to locations on the edge of their territory, and pile them up there. They would then defecate on the pile. 

The extent of this behavior’s effects is unclear. It was certainly a deterrent for all potential threats: do not enter, or you will end up like this. Additionally, strategic placement of these mounds on elevated terrain limits the contamination of the tapirs’ habitat. It might also have helped to attract black vultures, who not only feed on the contents of the mounds, but also engage in mutualistic behavior with multiple species of tapir, in which they remove ticks from the tapirs’ bodies. They likely were the only large predators that were allowed to approach breeding groups of wetland tapirs. 

Although we know that the wetland tapir was known to western society as early as 1700, the oldest surviving firsthand English-language account of a wetland tapir dates to 1817. It was written by Sergeant Jonathan Heet, who entered the Everglades during the First Seminole War, an imperialist invasion of a territory inhabited by native Americans and formerly enslaved people.

Heet recounts finding a charnel mound that contained the corpses of six US American soldiers, still armed with their rifles. He later encountered a tapir from the group that had likely constructed the mound: 

“It breached the surface of the water in front of the first of our canoes. It was huge, much larger than a bear, pitch black, and had a short trunk like that of an elephant. I had heard of the mud bears and their strength, but was shocked to watch it demolish a canoe and kill the two men on it as quickly as one would swat a fly. We shot at it, but it took eight shots for it to turn around and dive back into the water.”

He later observed a group of Seminole people harvesting vegetables that had been grown on a mound that seemed more fertile than the surrounding land, and whose earth was interspersed with bones. It is likely that the Seminole peoples used the mounds left behind by disbanding tapir groups to grow crops, as the remaining compost was rich in nutrients and high enough to prevent flooding.

With the American exploration and subsequent draining of the Everglades, wetland tapirs were gradually driven to extinction. The destruction of their habitat led to increased attacks on humans even outside of childrearing season. In response, local authorities offered bounties for hunted tapirs. Where earlier guns had been unable to significantly hurt wetland tapirs, through the use of modern guns and concerted efforts the remaining tapirs were driven to extinction by the end of the century.

The last known wetland tapir, a large female nicknamed ‘Mama Bear’, was killed in 1892. Her skeleton is still on display in Orlando, Florida. Although stories of supposed sightings are frequent to this day, no conclusive evidence of surviving specimens has been presented.

[institute-for-cryptobiology]

The gossamer swallow (orochelidon bombyx) is a species of small passerine bird endemic to the cloud forests and woodlands of the Andes. 

Gossamer swallows are small and rotund, with sizes up to 10 cm and weights up to 11 grams. Their heads, necks, and underside are brackish brown, and their backs and wings are almost black with a green shimmer. 

Like other swallows, gossamer swallows are endurant and swift flyers, but unlike many of their relatives perch to feed. Their wings are unusually large and strong, which supports their hunting style.

Gossamer swallows are insectivores and, like most swallows, catch their prey in flight. Instead of rapidly swooping at flying or sitting prey, gossamer swallows employ a hunting style more similar to that of spiders:

The swallows’ saliva has a unique composition that allows it to congeal into fine, silk-like strings when it leaves their beaks. While it does not quite have the tensile strength of spider silk, it is robust enough and just as sticky. When they set out to hunt, gossamer swallows begin to drool, and pick up the resulting strings with their wings when they become long enough.

Eventually, this results in a whole, translucent curtain of sticky silk the swallows drag with them, weighed down on the end with solidified drops of saliva. This curtain extends down about 15 cm on average, longer than the swallow’s own body length. In 2017, a specimen in Peru was caught on video with a curtain extending down at least thrice the bird’s length.

This allows gossamer swallows to hunt in bulk instead of hunting down and snatching up selected, high-value targets. Often, a swallow will rush through a swarm of insects, and catch a whole meal. 

This hunting strategy comes at a cost, though: while most other swallows feed as they hunt and do not need to land, gossamer swallows need to perch to pick the strands of silk off their wings and consume them along with the caught prey. This leaves them vulnerable to predators. 

The gossamer swallows’ main predators are the different species of wild cats and foxes native to the Andes. On occasion, swallow nests are raided by corvids and - during times of severe food scarcity - even by Andean condors.

Gossamer swallows are rated Least Concern. They share their extensive habitats with several related species, most notably the brown-bellied swallow. 

[institute-for-cryptobiology]

The crocodile cat is neither a crocodile, nor a cat. It is, however, easy to understand where this name originated:

Crocodile cats are feliform carnivorans with a roughly cat-like build that reach sizes between 60 and 80 centimeters (plus 60 to 70 centimeters tail) and primarily hunt as ambush predators near water sources. 

While their precise classification within the family is unclear due to the lack of data, they are generally agreed to be viverrids, likely closely related to binturongs. Most viverrids are primitive, nonspecialized feliform, this is not the case for the crocodile cat. Their current scientific name is artictis odibilis (lit. ‘hateful bear-weasel’). Further colloquial names include ‘dropcat’, ‘African wolverine’, and ‘stink lion’. 

Their fur is coarse and dense, with a desaturated, dark ochre colorization and the for viverrids typical cryptic pattern, although it is less visible due to their dark base colorization. Crocodile cats have very large, curved, retractable claws that are equally useful for climbing and tearing flesh. Unlike most viverrids, crocodile cats are slow and heavyweight, reaching almost twice the weight of the similarly sized binturongs. 

Like many feliform carnivorans (e.g. hyenas, or the more closely related African civet), crocodile cats possess an exceptionally strong bite fit to crush bones. 

Crocodile cats employ a very specific hunting style: 

They seek out trees near lakes and rivers, and perch on overhanging branches. Once in place, they can remain in position for days on end. Their fur provides excellent camouflage, and makes them almost invisible. When prey passes beneath the branch, the crocodile cat drops down on them. With the aerial mobility typical for cats, they always land claws-first. 

The force of the impact immobilizes or at least startles the prey, and the cat then clings to the prey with its immense claws. Smaller prey - which means prey smaller than an adult wildebeest - has little way to escape; it either bleeds out through the wounds caused by the crocodile cat’s claws, or is paralyzed through targeted bites to its neck. Larger prey - reaching up to adult buffalos and, rarely, even hippos - is unlikely to die quickly. Instead, until shaken off, the crocodile cat will tear pieces of flesh from the prey’s back and eat them. 

Even when shaken off, the crocodile cat is a resilient and dangerous predator. Since it is not fast enough to escape from an agitated animal thrice its size, the crocodile cat will use its claws to cut the tendons on attackers’ legs to cripple them. 

While this strategy works excellently against isolated targets with limited intelligence, groups and animals with a higher intelligence - elephants, for example - pose an almost insurmountable danger to crocodile cats. When no other escape route is available, crocodile cats have been observed to dive into the water to escape. They are no particularly good swimmers, so a sudden dive into murky waters is primarily a way to improve their camouflage.

Crocodile cats are solitary, and mark their large territories using their perineal glands. They lack the erectile dorsal crest other viverrids use in their threat displays; crocodile cats indeed do not seem to engage in any threat displays at all. 

Intra-specious encounters are usually short and non-violent, as crocodile cats tend to avoid violent confrontations unless they are very certain they will win, and fights are otherwise likely to leave both parties severely injured. 

Other predator species rarely seek out direct confrontations with crocodile cats for the same reason. Their only natural predators are, ironically, crocodiles. Where the crocodile cats’ habitat overlaps with that of hyenas, the latter are occasionally observed driving potential prey towards trees on which the former is waiting, and then waiting until the crocodile cat has killed the prey and eaten its fill. Roughly fifteen humans are killed by crocodile cats each year, although such incidents may be underreported as crocodile cats usually only attack humans that are alone, and their attacks on isolated targets almost always end deadly.

While crocodile cats are rare, they are not critically endangered and their population levels are consistent. Crocodile cats can be found throughout most of subsaharan Africa’s savannas and steppes. As they rely heavily on camouflage, sightings are infrequent. While the practice of intentionally driving antelopes towards trees potentially used by crocodile cats was briefly a popular part of safari tours in South Africa during the 1950s, it quickly fell out of fashion because of the perceived cruelty of their behaviour.

[institute-for-cryptobiology]

The visionary barnacle (anelasma oraculum) is a parasitic, sessile barnacle native to shallow waters worldwide. Like its closest relative, anelasma squalicola, it is fully parasitic and feeds directly off the blood of its host instead of filter feeding like most other barnacles. 

Apart from the cirri, it retains the general body plan of most barnacles, with a rotund calcareous shell enclosing its body. The movable lid protecting its operculum is colored a dark, almost black, brown. Together with the white body, this leads to an appearance resembling an eye. 

Like many barnacles, a. oraculum is highly resistant to water loss. Since it isn't reliant on filter feeding and has access to a reliable source of moisture - the body of its host - the visionary barnacle can spend almost its entire life on an amphibious or even non-aquatic host. It only relies on aquatic environments for reproduction. 

Visionary barnacles secrete low concentrations of scopolamine through the tendrils they use for feeding. Scopolamine is a drug otherwise used for anesthesia and against spasms and gastrointestinal issues. It is hypothesized that this helps the barnacle to keep its host calm and healthy. 

It does, however, come with additional effects as the concentration of scopolamine in the host's body increases, for example because multiple visionary barnacles attach to the same host. In higher concentration, it induces mild hallucinations and confabulation, as well as phantom behaviours in which the affected host seems to interact with nonexistent objects or persons. 

Visionary barnacle larvae attach to animals, including humans, that enter shallow waters. Although the attachment to non-aquatic animals makes reproduction much harder, the larvae have no way of differentiating between potential aquatic and non-aquatic hosts. If the larva is removed or killed before it has completed its metamorphosis, the host retains only small wounds that heal quickly. Once grown, they are highly difficult to remove, as removal damages the surrounding tissue of the host. 

The wide variety of hosts makes it difficult to generalize the effects of the parasite. While hosts like small sharks can only sustain two or three parasites, large hosts like dolphins or humans may sustain between five and fifteen barnacles at once. 

Humans in coastal regions have been hosts to visionary barnacles throughout all of history. The resemblance in size, shape, and coloration to human eyes as well as the altered state of consciousness induced by large amounts of attached barnacles have led to the cultic use of visionary barnacles by priests, oracles, and mystics. 

The practice of ritual baths in ocean water pools that allowed the practitioner to “grow more eyes” and supposedly receive visions is attested in a variety of cultures worldwide, with the oldest known archaeological attestation being the remains of a sumerian priestess whose grave contained a total of seventeen visionary barnacles. Furthermore, similar practices are attested in the oral histories of multiple Australian aboriginal peoples that possibly date back to 20,000 BCE, but are no longer practiced today. 

Today, humans only rarely become hosts to visionary barnacles. If a larva attaches itself to a human, it is usually removed early enough to not become an issue. In the rare cage that a visionary barnacle grows to adulthood on a human host, surgical removal is necessary. In regions without access to modern medical care, this is usually done by penetrating the barnacle’s shell - killing it - and removing it piece by piece. This process is painful for the patient and the resulting wounds frequently get infected if the parasite isn't removed entirely. 

Intentional infection with anelasma oraculum is rare today. No known aboriginal cultures practice intentional infection today, and it is rare among neo-shamanic cultic practices. 

The practice had a brief resurrection in the public consciousness in 2013 on the then-popular microblogging website tumblr, when a user posted a series of selfies showing eight visionary barnacles attached to their throat and shoulder. The user claimed to have ‘received them as a divine present’ from a Wiccan deity. 

Over the course of two weeks, the dispute between initially concerned and well-meaning users and users who were either trolling or purposely ignorant degraded into an all-out dumpster fire. The user who had posted the selfies became increasingly erratic, although it is unclear how much of it was because of the infestation and how much was merely a result of the conflict. 

They last posted twelve days after the initial selfies, and the controversy died down soon after. To this day, the selfies occasionally show up in aesthetic posts for various pieces of horror media, divorced from their original context. 

[institute-for-cryptobiology]

While rare and cryptic animals are often considered more appealing and interesting than cryptic plants, it would be wrong to dismiss the study of cryptic plants entirely. 

A remarkable example of such plants is the haunted willow, salix maledictum. The haunted willow is a large, deciduous tree that grows up to 28 meters tall. Young specimens are very similar in appearance to weeping willows (salix babylonica), while older specimens are easily recognizable due to their thick, gnarly trunks and almost entirely grey bark. A reliable distinction between the two species are the haunted willow’s thick, coriaceous leaves. 

The haunted willow is native to most of northern Eurasia. They are highly shade tolerant, and deal well with temperatures below freezing. They grow slowly, but have an average lifespan of 300 years, much longer than most willow species.

What truly makes the haunted willow unique (and gave it its name) is its way of deterring predators. It combines two approaches:

The leaves and bark of the haunted willow contain high concentrations of the potent hallucinogen and oneirogen harmaline. Harmaline induces vivid hallucinations and a dream-like state that has been described as highly unpleasant. 

Additionally, the outer layers of the haunted willow’s trunk contain long, thin air pockets. When the tree moves even slightly, be it because of wind or because of contact with foreign bodies, these air pockets produce infrasonic clicks and creaks. Infrasound has been shown to induce fatigue, drowsiness, and even hallucinations. 

This combination allows the willow to cause altered states, seemingly paranormal encounters, and severe fatigue in people in the close vicinity of the tree. Ingesting even a handful of leaves or getting small amounts of its sap into an open wound can produce very intense effects for more than five hours. 

It is easy to see how this led to salix maledictum to become considered haunted. Attestations of ghosts, spirits, and gods appearing around trees are recorded throughout the species’ entire range, with some speculations even suggesting that the tree the Norse God Odin supposedly hanged himself on to learn the secrets of the runes might not have been the ash tree Yggdrasil, but indeed a haunted willow. 

Today, although removed from many densely populated areas, the haunted willow is still considered least concern. It flourishes in the less populated regions of Scandinavian and Baltic countries, as well as in Russia and Northern China. 

Despite its hallucinogenic effects, harmaline extracted from the leaves, sap, and bark of the haunted willow is only rarely used as a recreational drug. While its additional function as a monoamine oxidase inhibitor makes it attractive as a way of activating orally ingested DMT, it is unattractive on its own due to the overwhelmingly negative sensations it produces. 

A viral social media trend originating on the short form video hosting site TikTok in 2019 called “scary blazing” involved teenagers smoking joints containing a mixture of cannabis and haunted willow leaves. Such “spooky doobie[s]” were reported to have intense hallucinogenic effects and to frequently cause out-of-body experiences. The trend died down after several of its initial promoters were accused of lying about actually smoking joints containing s.maledictum. 

[teaboot]

Suggestions for how to cook a mermaid?

Mermaids are a protected species

[institute-for-cryptobiology]

I have some advice...

[institute-for-cryptobiology]

The doppelganger nightjar (caprimulgus qareen) is a large nightjar known for its remarkable mimicry. Although originally endemic to subsaharan Africa, the species has been introduced to southern Europe and western Asia. Like most nightjars, they are crepuscular insectivores with long wings and short beaks. They are larger than many of their relatives, reaching sizes and weights similar to tawny owls.

Nightjars are known for their excellent camouflage through the coloration of their feathers, and their unusual perching behavior. The doppelganger, however, adds a wholly different element to their defensive arsenal: a truly unique deimatic display.

While the doppelganger’s back has the usual brown-and-black coloration, its front side features unique patterns that change regularly throughout the bird’s life. With each molt, the pattern changes and adapts. Crucially, the pattern is influenced by the bird’s experiences. It often replicates face-like images - much like many moths - but indeed in the case of the doppelganger these faces are usually those of people it has observed.

If a doppelganger nightjar feels threatened, it will quickly fly upwards, and flash the face to the perceived attacker. This can, understandably, be incredibly frightening to humans, especially if they know the person whose face the bird replicated, or even worse: if it is their own face.

Throughout history, the doppelganger has been feared and/or worshipped by humans of many cultures. Whether perceived as an omen, an evil spirit, or a messenger, its natural mimicry has led to very different interactions with humans. This, too, is the reason for its spread throughout Europe and Asia. Conquerors and traders alike often brought these birds home. By the time of the Byzantine empire, it was customary to bring doppelganger nightjars to the courts of dying rulers, to either replicate the dying man’s face to watch over their successor’s crowning ceremony and first year of rule, or to cast the tiebreaking vote if the succession was contended by replicating the face of a particular candidate.

Nowadays, the doppelganger nightjar is widespread, but rare throughout its range due to overhunting. Many taxidermied specimens remain in historical collections throughout Europe, often displaying the face of a rival or enemy of the hunter. 

[institute-for-cryptobiology]

Forty million years ago, a species of varanid lizards conquered the mountainside of the European Alps. This varanid, seperadon, gained an edge over competing species by evolving a flexible mandibular symphysis similar to that present in modern baleen whales. 

This allowed it to effectively stretch its lower jaw to swallow very large prey whole, and then retreat into a crevice or cave to slowly digest it. Being able to engulf its prey at once meant that seperadon didn't have to defend its kills from kleptoparasites and scavengers. 

Over time, seperadon thrived in this otherwise for varanids atypical habitat. As the ecosystem provided ample prey and very little threats, descendants grew in size, eventually measuring up to four metres from head to tail. 

During the Eocene-Oligocene-Extinction Extinction Event, prey on whose abundance seperadon had relied became much rarer, and the at this point large and slow varanid went extinct alongside a large percentage of the planet's terrestrial fauna. 

Still, its legacy prevailed. Over the course of the previous million years, an offshoot of seperadon had evolved a truly unique characteristic: a lower jaw that had no mandibular symphysis at all, meaning that it split in the middle of the ‘chin’. 

This genus, protodraco, used its split jaw to more effectively catch smaller prey by simply charging at a target with its split jaw open, and closing it around the prey. 

Over a period of more than thirty million years, protodraco specialized further and developed a series of remarkable features: it re-evolved a pharyngeal jaw (otherwise only found in fish), increased the mobility and strength of its split jaw, and gradually extended the length of its jaws further and further. 

Around the time the first humans began to roam the earth, protodraco’s descendants reached their final form: draco draco, the Great Dragon. 

Dragons reach sizes of up to five meters head to tail, making them the largest extant varanids. As most varanids, they are venomous. Most remarkable, of course, is what became of their jaw:

A dragon’s skull makes up almost 40% of its body length (tail excluded), and its split lower jaw opens up to 300°. When open and spread out, the skin of the dragon’s cheeks stretches wide. This is not only used as a deimatic display, but also has a more practical application - it can be used to glide! 

The jaw bone, studded with teeth, can move quickly and forcefully enough to even allow the dragon to lunge forwards or upwards very rapidly, and can be used to extend the range of a gliding dragon. 

The ‘wings’ also are mobile enough to function as a rudimentary pair of legs, and are (especially in combination with the dragon's venom, which as in all varanids is secreted from the lower jaw) fearsome weapons. 

They hunt as ambush predators, making use of their aerial mobility and paralyzing venom. 

Dragons still primarily live in the high reaches of the Alps, although very small populations may exist in different mountainsides across Eurasia. Persistent rumors of a population in the Appalachian mountains are thus far unconfirmed. 

Though once almost hunted to extinction, dragons are nowadays considered only Near Threatened. Exacerbating factors are the persistent pseudoscientific claims that various dragon body parts may function as medicine, and the continued attacks on humans. 

Dragons are highly territorial, and well capable of killing and eating humans. Roughly one person a year worldwide is severely or fatally injured by a dragon. 

[valdevia]

Copper rot (Xylaria electrophaga) is a newly described fungus that, through yet unknown means, appears to obtain energy directly from electricity.

The adaptation, believed to have recently evolved from a wood-boring mushroom that fed on utility poles, lets this species enter cables through exposed metal, then grow outwards. This not only damages infrastructure, but often ends in a fire, which it uses to disperse its spores further. If encountering copper rot, it is not advised to touch it, as its white tips can conduct enough energy to cause electrocutions.

(Bestiary)