PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
🪼

@theartofmadeline

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@inthralling
here's my advice
yes, eat that
no, do not text back the fuckboy
hush, her sex life is none of our business
coconut oil
ok so yall may need to take a fucking seat because thERE IS SUCH THING AS PIGEON CHICKENS
forget fiery pits
this is what is in hell
why do thEY EXIST? PRAY FOR ME
human: *is heating up food*
alien: why are you doing that?
human: you see i want the particles in my food to vibrate at just the right frequency
Human: *is eating ice cream*
alien: wait you forgot to make that one vibrate!
human: well, you see, not with this food
This one is already vibrating at he desired frequency, but if it starts to vibrate at a higher frequency I lock it back in the cold box.
Human: *just reheated pizza in the oven*
Other human: *is eating a slice of the same pizza, but cold*
Alien: *exasperated sputtering*
Human: shots! shots! shots!
Alien: this liquid has negligible nutritional value and, furthermore, contains some molecules that I believe are poisonous to your species.
Human: …look, sometimes we just like to gather in social groups and disorient ourselves
High-key sideeyeing Emma Stone said that that the Best Director nominees are four men and Greta Gerwig. When will white feminists learn that, just because they are not women, doesn’t mean that Jordan Peele and Guillermo Del Toro’s nominations are not as meaningful as Greta Gerwig’s?
And what was the first thing that Guillermo Del Toro said in his acceptance speech? He highlighted that he was an immigrant.
untitled by emma covington
via weheartit
michael b. jordan featured on a sip with issa rae
“what sort of things did your family and friends do to support you and, to y’know, re-enforce that your are the talented person that you are?”