Into The Wilde

Kitty Wilde || 22 || Chaser for Puddlemere United

[into--the--wilde]

Owl || Jitty

Jake: How are your singing skills compared to your dancing skills?

Kitty: Phenomenal - Did you really have to ask? I'm a Wilde, there's nothing I can't do...except maybe reach the top shelf. Why are you asking? Need some pointer on how not to sound like Kermit the frog when you hit the low notes?

[skaikru-felicity]

I feel like I've failed as a nerd.

[skaikru-felicity]

Ah. So you have seen it. Either you liked the show but didn’t stick with it or you were too freaked out to finish the rest OR—Your favorite character got killed off. 

Which one was it?

[into--the--wilde]

Okay...not gonna lie, that was a little creepy and kinda impressive.

You caught me - I severed my ties with Lost when they killed off Boone, he was the only good thing to come out of that godforsaken T.V show. Besides old Artie and the guy that looks like white Mercedes.

[huntingapril]

Announcement.

[huntingapril]

Actually, I’m a Hit Wizard.

At least, I am by day. By night, I take up the persona of Garbage Man and fight the evil forces of litter, one street at a time.

[into--the--wilde]

Hit Wizard, huh? How admirable.

Well aren't you just a regular Angelina Jolie? I'm willing to bet you have you very own African orphan and all. Is this your idea of fun or do you actually have normal hobbies?

[skaikru-felicity]

I feel like I've failed as a nerd.

I only now just started watching Lost. Bloody second season and I’m cowering under the blanket. And what’s worse is I’m not even drinking to get through this.

[into--the--wilde]

I'd like to think even nerds had better sense than to watch Lost - I mean, come on, a polar bear in the middle of nowhere? And that's not even the least believable thing about the whole show.

[huntingapril]

Announcement.

Those interested in aiding with the regular clean up of Diagon Alley, feel free to turn up at 6pm tomorrow evening.

Together, we will work towards a much cleaner wizarding London.

[into--the--wilde]

So...you're like a glorified garbage man? Do you at least get paid or are you doing it out of the 'goodness of your heart'? 

[under-tales-deactivated20231108]

[Salamander] What I learned so far

[under-tales-deactivated20231108]

I’m glad that you know that I’m not a gentleman. Or I would have to make you to take the 101 classes about me again. I’m taking a break from the superhero duties, so I can have a drink or two. Would you stil want to drink my tequila if I told you that Santana took a sip from it before giving to me?

[into--the--wilde]

Dear Merlin, no! Once was more than enough. Ever heard of the saying 'Crime never sleeps'? You're officially the worst superhero ever. I stopped believing in cooties when I was 5, so unless she has some highly infectious disease I should know about I think I'll be fine.

[under-tales-deactivated20231108]

[Salamander] What I learned so far

[under-tales-deactivated20231108]

I don’t have popcorn, just tequila that Santana gave me. I’m waiting for the evil twin coming in, or to somebody to be bitch slapped or have a drink wasted being threw on their faces. 

[into--the--wilde]

You know, a real gentleman would get off his butt and go grab me some - Then again, i think we both know you're no gentleman. Tequila? I thought you'd given up doing anything that resembled fun? I'd be more than willing to take it off your hands.

[into--the--wilde]

[under-tales-deactivated20231108]

[Salamander] What I learned so far

That Santana’s mohawked friend is banging the fella with great hair from the prophet and the blonde fella from The Wand and Harper’s sidekick are disgusting or defeding his honor like some gentleman in distress.  This is better than watch All my wizards.

[into--the--wilde]

Quick, Lopez - Grab me some popcorn, this is the most excitement I've had since the last time someone called Kurt out for being hypocritical douchebag. I don't want to miss a thing.

[snixylittleliar]

Hey, he’s not all that bad once you get past the rough edges. But no, no fever. I’ll be fine.

[into--the--wilde]

I'd need a compass to navigate the sheer number of 'rough edges' Puckerman possesses. No fever? Huh...That can only mean you genuinely like him as a person, I shudder at the thought.

[portraitofacheerleader]

Dads called only to check if I fixed my eating patterns

[portraitofacheerleader]

Oh, you are so kind-hearted, Kitty. I am so sorry I didn’t get it first. You are only thinking in my best interest. Totally.

I really appreciate that, Katherine, but in the future I would like if you just forget me. Thank you very much.

[into--the--wilde]

Well - I wouldn't go that far. It's okay, Berry - You've always been a little slow on the uptake. 

As much as I would absolutely love to forget you, it's kinda hard to do when i'm forced to endure you presence on a weekly basis...Maybe you should consider spending more time with Marley away from our place of residence - Just a suggestion.

[snixylittleliar]

I’m glad I have Puckerman as a boss…. it means that I can call out with little notice if I need to. Spending the night curled up in a blanket with hot chocolate watching muggle movies from my childhood. It’s more than needed, to say the least.

[into--the--wilde]

Merlin - It's a miracle. This has to be the first time anyone's ever been glad about something pertaining to a Puckerman. Are you sure you're feeling okay - Not running a fever? Did Noah pay you to say this?

[ballycastlebeater-nick-blog]

A Memory Charm

has never sounded so appealing … 

[into--the--wilde]

Why? Did you accidentally catch a glimpse of some boobs? Must have been mortifying - I know they're not really your thing.

[into--the--wilde]

OWL → Kitty & Marley

Marley: I'll try.

Marley: ...Again?!

Kitty: I didn't tell you last time because I didn't think your delicate composure would handle the thought of that yeti dominating his conquest.

Kitty: But that's beside the point, what could possibly be so bad that you require brain bleach?

[into--the--wilde]

OWL → Kitty & Marley

Marley: I don't know whether to be flattered or disturbed that you nicknamed me after some random healer guy but okay.

Marley: you would be too if you found out something that requires brain bleach. Okay okay. No solo time.

Kitty: Flattered, /definitely/ flattered.

Kitty: Don't tell me our neighbours left their bedroom curtains open again?

[philosophicat]

I don't remember the last time I was fully sober

[philosophicat]

Alcohol is my mood stabiliser. It helps me deal with idiots.

[into--the--wilde]

Careful there, I'd hate for you to lose the precious few braincells that you have left.

[into--the--wilde]

OWL → Kitty & Marley

Marley: Well I like them both. So they are staying and I guess no new ones are happening.

Marley: ....that is so mean, Kitty. But fine. If you don't want to do anything then I will just... Take matters into my own hands. Or in this case; hand.

Kitty: You would. Wait, I've got one for you - So I was watching Merlin's Anatomy and there was this hot Healer they called McDreamy and it made me think of you, so from here on out I dub thee 'McDreamy"

Kitty: Whoa there. No need to do that, I was kidding, no cupcakes - I'm on my way. Someone's a little grumpy today, aren't they? Don't worry - We'll fix that soon enough.