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@invisiblebutterfly
Hey, it’s been a while. I have had a lot happen since we last spoke but this is the summary. Lesson number 1: never trust anyone with all of you; they will disappoint you. Lesson number 2: don’t trust people with your secrets; they’ll never really keep them. People pretend you are their everything, their happiness but you aren’t. Not really. All people care about in the end, is theirselves. Remember that, it will help you. Also look out for yourself. It’s a bloodbath out there, everyone else will be there for them. You are the only one who will have you.
It feels like life is constantly punishing me. Like maybe I was a bad person in a past life and the universe is righting itself. Or maybe I just make tremendously bad choices. The definition of insanity is making the same bad decisions over and over again and expecting a different outcome. Maybe I’m going insane. Maybe I am insane. I don’t know. It just seems like no matter what I do, I never end up happy. I’m never anywhere near a good place. Maybe some people are just made to be alone. People aren’t reliable. They’re selfish. You can’t trust them because in the end they’ll always put their own needs first no matter how much they love you. You’re never truly anyone’s priority.
If you hear people from my past speak of me. Keep in mind they are speaking of a person they don’t even know any more.
Unknown
Goodbye
I’ll never understand how it happens,
How we drifted so far apart.
One minute we were laughing,
Next it felt like I was missing a part of my heart.
Despite what people may think,
You were my first love,
Not the kind with whispers of sweet nothings
And steals of kisses.
But the kind of love that’s true,
We were so young, so innocent, me and you.
A rare kind of relationship that carries a spark.
Not the type of love that people think,
Not the type of love you’d think could disappear in a blink.
The type of love that leaves a mark.
The type of love that carves shapes in your heart.
The type of love that can tear you apart.
My first love wasn’t a boy,
But still one that brought me both pain and joy.
It was a friend, a true friend who got me for me,
We were as close as anyone could be.
Never once did I pretend to be someone else,
I was never too nervous around you to be myself.
Now we’re a shell of what we once were,
All the memories now a blur.
I always knew you’d grow up into the person you were meant to be,
But I never thought that would mean growning apart from me.
Even though we’ve now drifted so far apart,
You’ll always have those pieces of my heart.
The parts that broke off in your hand,
The parts of me that slipped between my fingers, like steady steams of sand.
I’m beginning to understand that people aren’t always meant to stay,
Some people you are just destined to meet along the way.
Before all the arguments and all that could come,
I want you to know how thankful for you I have become.
Thank you for having my back in a way I never knew,
I wouldn’t have ever made it through without you.
“My solitude doesn’t depend on the presence or absence of people; on the contrary, I hate who steals my solitude without, in exchange, offering me true company.”
— Friedrich Nietzsche, Thus Spoke Zarathustra: A Book For Everyone And No One
The art of letting go.
has a breakdown about what a lonely life it is. goes for a walk with headphones in. purchases a beverage at the supermarket. you know how it goes
Sometimes i really want to go sit in the middle of nowhere and not think for a while
Fernando Pessoa // Michel Foucault
Love is the antidote to fear.
There comes a time when you have to stop crossing oceans for people who wouldn’t even jump puddles for you.
-William Wordsworth
“Some people hate the thought of being alone. I’m not like that. I love my solitude. I’m kind to myself. My feelings don’t get hurt. My energy’s not leeched. And it’s very peaceful.”
— Unknown