I don’t know where to begin, Journal;
No person in their right mind would go to a shelter in Libel City save they had no choice. Especially downtown near Gateway St. But this is the situation we’re in. And we have to deal with fucking Phil. Phil is an asshole with no boundaries or moral code. He kind of reminds me of a curly haired Tin Tin. Last night I almost choked him Kairo stopped me.
Kairo, (also known as Kairo the Koala), is my spirit animal. My name isn’t important but the story is. So here’s how I almost killed Phil in the cafeteria.
We were sitting there with Tre and Milton [the Moon], some kid name AJ and I forgot the other kid’s name. Kairo & Milton were doing what spirits do, by giving up life and guiding us like in this realm & mortal body, such as any good soul. The rest of the fleshy beings, whom probably had no guides, made the backdrop to a bleakly lit cafeteria where all were burdened in some form or fashion. The conversation is gone in part from my memory, due to the fact Kairo had to block out so much in order to ward off all the homicidal fantasies. One minute we were talking about how AJ looked exactly like a young Jeffery Dahmer.
Tre: Whoa, you two look like the opposite race of each other.
Phil: [cutting me off] FUCK NO!
It was from that moment on that I hated his entire being. And it was also when I realized he was going to be a hemorrhoid. The entire time he sat there it was just one strange and insulting piece of jargon shit flowing from his mouth like a crooked clergyman. I couldn’t tell if he was annoying, bat-shit crazy, or all the above and more. The other two Anglo-Saxons on the other hand weren’t so bad. One I’m almost positive was only attracted to anime women. The other one has convinced me he very well might be some sort of serial killer.
By the time Kairo & Milton convinced Tre & I to go outside for a quick break, Phil had violated our personal space several times, almost made me choke him for attempting to call me a nigger, and caused my soul to grow so weary Kairo & I called it an early night.
Some good did come from last night besides laughing at strange Anglo-Saxons... Tre/Milton & Kairo/myself are going to start a GoFundMe to print sweatshirts which read “Calm Down, Phil” while he has one that says “I’m Phil”.
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