xiying

it's been january for months in both directions

[ireverents]

xiying. 22, any pronouns. consensual non shanecent advocator. icon credits: yue62170 lofter.

ao3 | open the post for my writing:

bird with a magnet

24k, explicit, sadomasochism + forced feminization + others. shame, homophobia, toxic masculinity & hazing culture, developing relationship, hr timeline. written for mean dom ilya week. link

Shane does not want Rozanov to make him ask.

“Shut up,” Rozanov snaps. He whips his head around, crowding Shane towards the wall. A sky-dividing sharpness to his anger, his mineral blue gaze. It fizzles out. “I did not say you are a girl.” Shane freezes. His heart opens before he can stop it. “Do you want me to be one?”

and i'll show you fearless

20k, explicit, sadomasochism + others, grief, developing relationship, hr-timeline, tender violence. link

Ilya seeks in Hollander a consolation prize. It takes ten years for him to obtain something more.

Ilya likes the chase, and the chase loves him back. Talking shit at Hollander is a pastime he’d wait months to indulge in. Hollander’s more than happy to greet him head-on. The difference is that Hollander likes being caught too.

where the city rests its feet

8k, explicit, gun-play, shame. post-hr. link

Ilya fucks Shane with an airsoft pistol.

Ilya laughs. “You are the one I target the most in the rinks. You are the one I check the most into the boards.” His teeth are lazy, backlit by a glint of amusement. “You are Shane Hollander, the best of the best. Which means,” he tilts Shane’s chin to the side and examines his cheeks closely, “I should be disappointed when you aren’t scoring like you should, yes?”

[ireverents]

overwhelmed i need to learn redis and also develop like 5 adhoc things for work

[ireverents]

honestly thanks for posting re: ai in fic on twt bc IT'S LITERALLY PISSING ME OFF SO BAD…. i read like 50k of an ai slop fic out of despair and curiosity and it honestly took such a toll to see all these comments blithely going along with a fic that frequently forgets its own plot points.. anyway i do actually have a question: is it just me or do you think there's a characterization thing also happening w/ ai generated fic? like all these ai gen fic characters are so like. meticulous and measured lol. to the point of frequently being really OOC. not really sure what to make of this , or if it's even a real thing, but i think maybe for whatever reason it's less easy for AI to spit out a characterization of a genuinely impulsive/messy character with no routine

i agree with you! i think gen-Ai fails at characterization.

i guess it depends on how much detail the prompter puts in. in general i dont think ai is very good at creating an inner world for the character on its own ? it only knows the character by the public domain but this only gets it a surface level description a fandom wiki wouldve had. the human writer inevitably differs by giving their character quirks & "headcanons" & interpretations that are highly specific to them.

i think thats why ai characters sound like placeholders and are indecisive & vague. they never appear to do anything outside of the tropes they're defined by; nothing contradictory & nothing off the rails. "meticulous and measured" is a good way to put it lol

the case is obviously different if the prompter tells the ai to use their specific interpretation etc. but even then ai is like.... really really bad at weaving character thoughts into the text (which is disproportionately descriptive wrt settings and actions)

thanks for the ask!

[ireverents]

an obviously ai fic is finally being called out for ai

[ireverents]

i'm so annoyed

[ireverents]

my sister has a boyfriend. she wants to invite him over to stay with me and my parents in september and thus my mom started talking about how i dont have a "second half yet". i said "i dont like men" and she went "what so you like girls?! 😨" but when i said "no" she believed me and said "thank goodness you scared me." there is no hope for this woman. we have had some variant of this conversation multiple times and she is never getting the hint because the truth is so implausible to her that it will always remain a joke. even i treat it like a joke

[ireverents]

core lore tag game

i was tagged by @solarspunk. thank you for the tag ! unfortunately there are many things wrong with me so you get a lore dump.

which piece of information explains everything wrong about this blog

strange fascination with kneeling historical cdrama characters at the age of 6

all girls' primary & high school

east asian parents

shipped drarry & dramione as a kid. also past bts fan

weird relationship* (see below) with high school teacher

almost-daily dose of energy drink

university with odd rituals and latin ceremonies

4 years stuck in class with gifted kid who got into university at 14**

6 years living with the British

owning 10 twitter accounts

very unhealthy first ever sapphic relationship

repeatedly & obsessively taking personality-type tests for years for no reason

Voting ended onJun 30

* — nothing illegal. but it was an all girls' school, she was young, & there was a weird two-way toxic platonic obsession going on & my classmates could see it & theorized it was because she saw me as a "miniature" version of her. she made obvious i was a 'favorite' but there was also a crazy validation-seeking mechanism on my part. she would always be looking for signs that i was mentally unwell because i had the same mental illness that she used to have. admittedly she was pretty and like every lesbian who was also mentally ill in my year had a crush on her. Oops

** — he also knew the map of germany by heart and liked omori the game. he was getting private classes with one of our tutors for 3rd year content when we were all in 1st year. i also saw him on ao3 in a lecture and legend has it that he walked around on interview day with a chess set (iirc, or maybe it was poker). really liked that guy tbh but it truly is an experience to be having 1-on-2 classes with him

i tag @emberglows @csmelt + anybody else who wants to do this.

[ireverents]

be careful before you larp competence at work soon they will start believing you and you accidentally become important and now you're scared of disappointing people

[ireverents]

whats up people ive been SO busy at work

[awakenedpotential]

shane and ilya’s girls: a fic rec list (in progress)

i like reading about shane denying that ilya could feel anything for him because of his insecurities about ilya’s bisexuality. lots of fics explore this in a way that’s really nuanced and true to character. heed the tags, but due to the nature of the premise, all of these fics flirt in some way with misogyny and/or canon-typical biphobia.

1. cortisol, oxytocin, vasopressin by rhodenia

Shane meets with one of Rose’s friends- a ballet dancer who hooked up with Ilya during the playoff season where Boston won the cup. She shares what happened during that hookup (including Ilya staring longingly at Jane’s texts!), and she becomes a representation of the women Ilya could have in his head. The angst, the pining, all of it is very delicious.

2. all my perversions by @probablily

Shane watches this sex tape over and over again, trying to figure out if Ilya treats him like a hookup, treats his girls the way he treats Shane. I love that he’s watching it sitting right next to Hayden, #ourShane.

3. bird with a magnet by @ireverents

So visceral, and ties in Shane’s past experiences in a way that is gutting. Shane sees a lipstick stain on Ilya’s sofa and spirals. He buys a skirt and keeps it hidden for seven years like a monster under his bed. It’s a looming specter over every one of their interactions- Ilya, do you want me to be a girl? And then you get the catharsis in that last sex scene, and it’s unreal. Must-read!!!

4. like one of your girls by @creamsiclemelt

That scene where Shane just snaps and is like “I’m not letting you cum in me.” because he can’t risk it. He wants to give Ilya something his girls can’t, but what would that say about him? The double ko.

[ireverents]

hello! im sorry to bother u because i have no idea if this is something you’re still invested in, but, if you do have the time, ive got a question regarding your text generator for ao3. i cannot for the life of me get imgur to work either as texting a picture or for the contact name itself. it works on the generator itself, but when i send it over to ao3 it does not appear (everything else works). is this a bug, or is it something that im doing wrong on my end? thank you so much ❤️

hi! please send another ask (or dm me) with the specific link you tried so i can check what's wrong. there are a couple of link formats ao3 doesn't accept; it could be that

[xinyuehui]

*Yuanzhi gets upset* *Shangjue finds it amusing and goes to coax him*

[montrealmetros]

while we're on the subject of ilya going to therapy i think the only way it could work is if ilya goes to therapy because shane wants him to -> he bullshits it for three sessions -> quits -> has a bipolar manic and/or depressive episode that seriously disrupts their lives -> shane pressures him to go -> he bullshits it -> etc etc until a suicide attempt lands him involuntarily inpatient care and he actually has no choice but to do it (after bullshitting it for a bit).

[ireverents]

i have nothing smart to say. sundays are strange. i want to get drunk but i cant be hungover at work tomorrow. i need electrolytes?? probably. my brain feels like it's in agar jelly rn. writing is weird also. havent written in weeks

[lamenweek]

Save the date!

[beegonethots]

Explaining tumblr to anyone

[ireverents]

🌻

i don't buy the argument that 'hr is gay hockey porn why are you expecting it to give good commentary on racism/hockey/neurodivergence/etc. it's meant to be read with one eye closed' because well. a piece of work can be erotic and still address important issues. do we think erotica is not an art form or that it isn't worthy of the same level of critique