¡Un Café Irlandés, Por Favor!

Un archivo del comic de Irish Coffee que se publicaba en el diario argentino Clarín a finales de los 90/An archive of the Irish Coffee comic that ran in the argentinian newspaper Clarín in the late 90s (+translations in english)

[irish-coffee97]

Introudcciones y Advertencias/Introductions and Warnings

Bienvenidos sean todos a este archivo que recopila una edicion especial de Irish Coffee creado por el duo de historietistas Carlos Trillo y Carlos Meglia, tambien responsables de Cybersix.

Estas paginas fueron publicadas desde el 1ro de diciembre de 1996 en el suplemento semanal Segunda Sección en el diario Clarín y cada domingo relata las aventuras de Irish Coffee y sus amigos durante las elecciones presidenciales del fin del milenio y todos los descabellados eventos sobrenaturales que le acontecen.

Se publicaran en este blog en la misma forma semanal cada domingo tal como se hacia en el diario, hasta que termine, todavia no llego al final asi que yo tampoco se cuando sera eso.

Siendo esta una creacion del duo Trillo/Meglia publicada en una seccion de politica, esta obra cuenta con alto contenido adulto por lo que se debe proceder con discrecion. Desde violencia, muchos desnudos femeninos y todo lo que eso conlleva, satira de politica argentina y quizas no te guste como se ve Sake, asi que vayan con cuidado. Pondre esos avisos de contenido que tiene tumblr asi que vayan a su configuracion para que puedan ver las paginas y tratare de poner contextos si algo es demasiado argentino, cualquier cosa, pueden preguntar~~

Este es un side blog manejado por @neutrallyobsessed y no se bien como funciona la movida asi que nose tengalo en cuenta xd

Un agradecimiento especial y final a las hemerotecas nacionales que llevan el archivo fisico de estas paginas y feliz lectura para todos!

~~~~

Welcome everyone to this archive that compiles a special edition of Irish Coffee created by comic book artist duo Carlos Trillo and Carlos Meglia, also responsible for Cybersix.

These pages were published since December 1st of 1996 in the weekly suplement Segunda Sección in the Clarín newspaper and every sunday it tells the adventures of Irish Coffee and his friends during the presidential elections of the end of the millenium and the wacky supernatural events that happen.

It'll be published in this blog weekly and every sunday like the newspaper did until it's finished. But I haven't reached the end yet so I don't know when it ends either.

Being a creation of the Trillo/Meglia duo and published in a politics section, this piece contains high amounts of adult content so discression is advised. From violence, lots of female nudity and all what it implies, satire of argentine politics and you may not like how Sake looks, so be careful one that. I'll put up those content warnings tumblr let's you put, so go to your setting so you can always see the pages and I'll try to provide contexts to the most argentinian things, in any case you can ask~~ (including in english ofc)

This side blog is run by @neutrallyobsessed and idk how the whole thing works so idk have that in mind xd

A final and special thank you to the national hemerotecas (libraries that archive newspapers and magazines) who carry the physical archive of these pages and happy reading to everyone!

[irish-coffee97]

Y este parece ser el fin, despues de buscar en el resto del mes y en enero, no vi que se publicaran as paginas. Aunque la verdad se nota que se les estaban acabando las ideas xd. No encontre ninguna confirmacion o saludo que diga que este es el fin en verdad, pero los tiempos coinciden de cuando se empezo a trabajar en la serie animada de Cybersix asi que eso tambien debio influir sobre dejar de escribir este comic. Estuvo interesante mientras duro, bueno tenerlo bien archivado pa futuras generaciones. Pronto les dejare un drive con todas las paginas y ediciones para que se vean mas bonitas mas una apropiada traduccion en ingles, saludos y felices fiestaaaas :3

~~~~

And this seems to be the end, after searching the rest of the month and January, I didn't see that more pages where published. Though you can tell they were running out of ideas xd. I haven't found any confirmation or send-off confirming that was in fact the last page, but the times align to when they've started working on the Cybersix cartoon, so that must have swayed the decision on stopping work in this comic. It was interesting while it lasted, it's nice to have it archived for future generations. Soon I will leave you a drive with all the pages and edits so they look better with a proper english translations, greetings and happy holidaaaaaays :3

[irish-coffee97]

Irish Coffee #55 (14-12-97)

Este parece ser el final... (English translation under the cut)

This seems to be the end...

Every morning, after reading the newspaper, Irish Coffee comforts himself thinking the following: "I'm a happy pesimist. Things keep getting worse that what I could have ever thought."

Singer: ♪For that great argentinian who knew how to unite the masses of the people, fighting against the cap-♫

Menem: Stop that, I can't stand it! Don't sing that song!!

Singer: Ah, excuse me, Mr. Rick but... she's here and asked me to sing it.

Menem: My God, alright, play it again Sam, if she can handle it then so can I.

Meijide: Hello Rick, I'm back

Menem: To stay with me?

Meijide: No, to take care of this bar. You have to leave, Rick.

Alvarez: This way, Misteg Güick.

Menem: (Is this one french or just has the accent?)

Meijide: Is he gone?

Alvarez: Yes, let's toast Ggraciela.

Meijide: This can be the beggining of a beautiful friendship.

Irish: No, no! Casablanca isn't like that!

Menem: Ah, I got confused. I was telling you of Casarrosada, Irish

Irish: (of course, poor guy. He only has one idea fixed in the head...)

Menem: I'll have to leave, I'll have to leave...

Next Sunday: Innocent Blood

[irish-coffee97]

Irish Coffee #54 (7-12-97)

Y por eso los extraterrestres no nos visitan (English translation under the cut)

And this is why aliens never visit us

After throughly analizing last election's results, Irish Coffee thought that maybe argentinians don't have a sense of humor. One keeps pulling their leg for ten years and some get mad...

Irish: (Damn, who'd be ringing the doorbell now?)

-Are you Irish Coffee?

Irish: Yes.

-And you invented the device to communicate with the most distant galaxies?

Irish: Yes.

-Right this way, sir.

Menem: Excuse me. I have to talk to this mic, right?

Irish: Hey, but you can't-

Menem: Attention Attention! This is a message for all extraterrestrial ships that are near the Solar System, Attention! There's a place in the southern hemisphere called Argentina which this 10th of December of 1999 will enter a period of great chaos and weakness...

Irish: Stop it, I say!

Menem:... And it'll be the perfect time to bring upon a brute force invasion with laser rays, flying plates and unbeatable green soldiers.

Irish: But no-!

Menem: Remember aliens, after the 10th of December of '99, fuck their shit up so they learn to not be so ungreatful! This is from good source, so listen to me! Thank you, fellow brother of my countryland

Alien: Did you hear that, commander?

???: Yes.

Alien: So what do we do?

Meijide: Nothing. As if were going to pay attention to that plebian caudillo, mister Spock.

Next Sunday: Play It Again

[irish-coffee97]

Irish Coffee #53 (30-11-97)

Salvando lo que mas importa (English translation under the cut)

Saving what matters most

Irish swears he heard this dialogue between two councilors leaving: -And to think I was honest when I was younger... -Well, you grow up and you have to start to assuming responsibilities

When the rain started pouring incontrollable upon the Earth on that 10th of December 1999, the man who knew how to read the signs of heaven decided to preserve a male and a female of each species. To his ark entered two Ferraris, a boy golfball and a girl golfball, two Corbatos of Italian branding. Behind them, the most qualified men, and the best endowned woman to preserve our own species. At the end, the Chosen One got in, who knew that in the rise of the next goverment would bring to our lands the new universal flooding. And everything died under the waters, and only the ark lived on for 4 long years. After that time, the waters started lowering and in the 10th of December of 2003 they could see the land of the tall tops of Anillaco.

Menem: ...And The Great One returned, to once again guide his nation after that dark period of desolation and disgrace. And that's the story for the years to come, Irish Coffee, I know it, I have this bad feeling for after my leave from Olivos.

Irish: (First with the southern storms, he told me of the pampeanic apocalypse, then the heatwave from the holes in the ozone cape, and now the storms makes him talk about the flooding. I don't want to think what it'll get in his head with the El Niño current)

Next Sunday: Mars Attack

Anillaco is the birth city of Menem

Olivos is where the the presidential house is. It is different from the goverment house where they do not live in, it's only their workplace.

[irish-coffee97]

Irish Coffee #52 (23-11-97)

Casi no hay diferencia... (English translation under the cut)

There's almost no difference

To those who anguish on the judgement of posterity, we ask to stay calm. If everything continues the way it was planned, we'll leave posterity with more dramatics to worry about.

-Hold it, argentinian! Don't go ahead so carelessly knowing that the night is coming!

-Don't you have any concious of what would happen if you don't do the right thing on time? Get ready for what's coming if you don't react out of this fatigue! Watch out for the terrible future that comes after our wonderful present!!

-We're the spokepeople of the prophecy! Be careful with what you do or the horrors will fall down upon you like lightning!

Irish: Stop that man, let me go...// It's me, I'm back, love!

Clarita: Ah finally, the food almost burned up. What took you so long? Did you run up with someone?

Irish: No, it's one of those numbers the president prepares to see if we get scared into begging the re-reelection. Honestly, these marketing tactics got me a bit done with all. Can I dip bread in the sauce, see if that gets rid of the bad luck?

Next Sunday: Come back, Noah!

[irish-coffee97]

Irish Coffee #51 (16-11-97)

Este parque no es muy divertido ToT (English translation under the cut)

This park isn't very amusing ToT

Irish overheard the following dialogue between a grandson and his grandpa: -They discovered the rejuvenation serum, granpa -Oh no, oh my God! It's happening again!

Argentinian Ghost Train

-I'm the errant soul of a retiree, booooooo!

-Do you have kids? Prepare yourself to the education we'll give them with the budget we have, oh poor ones!

-If you don't vote for us in the '99's elections, get reaaaaaaady!

Menem: If the good ones also lose in the '99, then there won't be nothing left! Ha haaaaaa!

Irish: Mercy!

-Hello, I am the future that awaits for you!

Exit

Irish: See how from all the versions of the ghost train, this one is the scariest?

Next Sunday: Living Dead

[irish-coffee97]

Irish Coffee #50 (9-11-97)

Es que son unos monssssstruos!! (English translation under the cut)

It's cause they're monsssssters!!

Irish swears he heard this dialogue between two opposing politicians: -I say, between us, nobody steals? -They do, but we do it with a lot of guilt

Dr. Menem: Igor Coffee! Move! Connect that cable! Hurry up, my God, we have to take advantage of the storm's energy!

Igor Coffee: Ngyes Master.

Dr. Menem: Today all glory comes back to me! I'll give life to the perfect creature to win this 99's election! Putting in the best of each of my loyals! Kohan's ears that hear everything around him, the facial rigidness of senator Yoma so he can say everything is fine with moving a single muscle, Corach's liver that is pure asbestos, the back of Rodriguez to handle all the punishment, the elegance of Di Tella to know how to behave, Granillo Ocampo's professional language, Amadeo's conviction that there are no more poor people, Ramon Hernandez's fidelity... Hahaha!!! I'm a genius! And I will never have or be defeated thanks to my creation!

Igor Coffee: Sir... this thingy is moving.

Dr. Menem: So? What do you think, Igor Coffee? Are we winning the elections with my creature?

Igor Coffee: Well, with that face... with that face I don't think so, sir.

(Me and my damn big mouth) (fake hump)

Next Sunday: Ghost Train

[irish-coffee97]

Irish Coffee #49 (2-11-97)

SUPER MENEM!!!!!! (English translation under the cut)

Irish says that last sunday, on the queue to get in the dark room, there was a known politician who, when it was his turn, he muttered: "It's alright, I cover my nose and vote for me"

Menem: Pst, eh, you brother!

Irish: You're talking to me?

Menem: Yes, you you, I want to show you something so you can see my sincere interest to listen to the voice of the people. Now I will start the fight agaisnt corruption, agaisnt the flawed justice system, agaisnt the illicit enrichment of few and against the bad actors of politics. Follow me, I will not dissapoint you, brother of my land

Irish: Poor guy, in the last 10 days everything has been going wrong for him. River lost... he lost his Ferrari... Peronism lost... and now someone put green kryptonite on him.

Next Sunday: Frankenstein

[irish-coffee97]

Irish Coffee #48 (26-10-97)

Hoy y ahora tambien se vota jajajaj (English translation under the cut)

Today and now it's also election day hahahah

-My concious is clean, I change it every morning.

They say that a known politician expressed this thought the other day and Irish went to the dark room thinking he wasn't going to vote for That One

-This really is a close election, isn't it?

Next Sunday: Will Everything Fall Apart?

[irish-coffee97]

Irish Coffee #47 (19-10-97)

Incertidumbre Temporal (translation under the cut)

Timely Uncertainty

What to do? Who to call? What to invent to get out of a problem? That morning, Irish Coffee realized that he had no ideas. "Maybe I threw them out by mistake, along with the ideologies", he sighed defeated

Irish: (If I don't get some money, my electricity it's going to be cut off)

Future Past Present

-Good afternoon, we're here to cut out the electricity

Candle

Next Sunday: Vote Aloud

[irish-coffee97]

Irish Coffee #46 (12-10-97)

Los politicos no estan para ayudarte, mucho menos salvarte (English translation under the cut)

Politicians aren't there to help you, even less to save you

Irish Coffee before, being hanged bottoms up, he thought: "Menem critizices Alfonsin because he wants to bring back the country 30 years into the past. However it wouldn't be half bad to be 30 years younger..."

Middle Class

Irish: Ay... Someone help me, please!!

Duhalde: Alright, let me see. What we could do is to reforce the rope, it looks kinda fragile, doesn't it? Listen, I promise to add a steel filament to the inside so it doesn't give in and you won't fall to the abyss. That being said, you'll have to vote for me first, citizen.

Irish: Gh, an 'an you 'elp 'e?

Meijide: Before that, let's take that crap out of your mouth. I could put a mattress at the bottom of the abyss so when the rope cuts off you wont splat on the floor, sonny. But of course, you'll have to vote for me first.

Irish: And you? Can you take me out of here?

Menem: No, and don't be ungreatful... After all I tied you there so you won't cause any more ruckus, so you better vote for me or else... bye rope~

Irish: It seems like my problem will just be solved this Sunday 26th

Next Sunday: One Week Left

[irish-coffee97]

Irish Coffee #45 (5-10-97)

Como dijeron en Futurama, siempre es la culpa del que vino antes (translation under the cut)

Like it says in Futurama, always blame who came before you

Before starting to investigate who's responsible of everything that's been happening, an idea crossed Irish's mind that those who say that humanity is killing itself could say that what they're doing is legitimate defense.

I'm here analizing our history to know who's responsible, I'll explain it to you:

Menem says that the one who's responsible of everything is Alfonsin, who handed over a land ran over by the most horrible chaos. But this one points fingers to the Military dictaorship, who's Economy Minister applied impossible to mantain conversion rates and fucked Argentina over. The Military on their part, were looking straight to Isabelita as the great generator of chaos and disorder. She also looked backwards and said it was with Lanusse and before him with Ongania where the big national disaster happend. Ongania on his part, talked about the inefficiency of Illia's govement as the cause for a country adrift. Illia intuitively thought that all the origin was at its predecesors, the sums of Frondizis, Aramburus and Perons that have produced this explosive cocktail. Peron with a winking eye would accuse Castillo, Ortiz, Justo and almost mutely to a president called Yrigoyen. Yrigoyen blamed the conservatives, voting aloud, the Contubernios, Pellegrini and Julio A. Roca. Roca said we were this way because of Rosas while this one pointed an acusatory finger to the mulato Rivadavia. Rivadavia saw the many causes of badness in the Primera Junta. The members of the Primera Junta pointed with no doubt to the corrupt and inconsistent line of viceroys. All those viceroys in unison said that the responsibles were those barbaric and uncaring who occcupied the lands before the conquest. While the natives used to blame... uhh.....

Excuse me, miss, where is the paleontology section?

Next Sunday: Hanged

[irish-coffee97]

Irish Coffee #44 (28-9-97)

En este caso, el Irish fue medio gil xdd (English translation under the cut)

In this case, Irish was the guillible one xdd

Irish Coffee walks thinking that he has less and less money, that he's not living by the day but by the quarter of an hour, when a girl quite young and pretty signals him like she wants to tell him something important.

Girl: Psst.. please... Look, I've been following you for a while and, uff I'm getting all red in the face, I don't know how to say this... Don't take this the wrong way but, you remind me of a high school teacher that, fahh, you're identical and...! And I was so in love with him, incredible, you even got that same sad look on your eyes.

Irish: Sad? No one's ever told me that I had a sad look. (And no, it's not sadness, it's boredom. With that idiot that waits for me home that will soon recieve me as if I was her cousin and not the love of her life... psst)

Girl: I don't know...but... how handsome, you even dress the same and I... I can't believe it! And even the same cologne you use, what can I say? It kills me!

Irish: So, could you like to have some coffee, so we can get to know each other a bit more?

Girl: Not today. I... I'm feeling so embarrassed, what you'll think of me, but I'm always hanging around here so, maybe another day, and I don't know, maybe I' coul'd accept the coffee. Bye~

Irish: Goodbye~ (That means... that I'm still a man. A man who awakens interests in young girls and... and... but- What a b- she stole my wallet!!) <-SUCKER

Clarita: You got home, my love? I was just watching the news that we have to be careful. Seems like wallet snatchers are using new techniques.

Irish: snif Yeah, I know. (And now worse, they steal your illusions)

Next Sunday: Is Anyone Guilty?

[irish-coffee97]

Irish Coffee #43 (21-9-97)

"Milagros" de la epoca de elecciones (English translation under the cut)

"Miracles" of the election season

Irish Coffee is sitting at a bar thinking that there are historical moments where one would like to say: "I wasn't there", when a voice takes him out of his wondering and the following dialogue happens:

???: Hello Irish, long time no see!

Irish: Shit, just got the sensation that someone was talking to me.

???: That's right man, it's me. Pedro Perez, don't you remember?

Irish: Peeedro, of course I remember, we used to work together. I didn't recognize you 'cause honestly I can't see you.

Pedro: Well, i'm ex-middle class, I lost my job at 45 years old, y'know?

Irish: Yeah, when they computarized the business and cutted down personnel, it was terrible.

Pedro: heh, you tell me.

Irish: Let's have some coffee.

Pedro: It's on you? I don't have a penny on me.

Irish: Waiter, two coffees. Perez, my old friend, what a joy, so tell me, what do you do for a living now?

Pedro: Well, I do the odd job here or there, but I'm not getting much lately... Don't you need your house to be painted or to have your faucet fixed?

Irish: No, not really, but tell me... How did you become invisible?

Pedro: You see, it happens to every middle class person that falls off the wheel.

-...And I promise you there will be jobs for everyone, specially for the sacrificied middle class who has lost all hope...

Irish: What a joke, so tell me, do you ever become visible?

Pedro: Yeah, look, look. There's a hand and in a moment the rest of the body starts appearing, it always happens during these times.

Irish: What? In spring?

Pedro: No idiot, when it's election season. It's the only time we get to exist again.

Next Sunday: Dreaming the Future

[irish-coffee97]

Irish Coffee #42 (14-9-97)

Convenciendo al pueblo con empanadas (English translation under the cut)

Convincing the people with empanadas

Woody Allen said that, to him, the second most important organ is the brain. To the double-intentioned question of which is the first one, an argentinian didn't even need a second to think it: the stomach.

Sedobla to the Congress/Sedobla The Future/Sedobla doesn't break

Sedobla: Let me take your hand, argentinian, I'm Andres Sedobla candidate for Congress, a such pleasure to meet you... Would you like a hot empanada, citizen? Try it with no compromise. It's good, eh? With lots of filling, I don't know if it's noticeable. Now this are empanadas, not like what the other party was giving out that we best don't name, they were like balloons, right? heheh, you bit them and they deflated. I must tell you, citizens, that each bite is a metaphor to my legislative action. To make happy to those who like to sink their teeth in it.

Advisor: Careful with what you say, Dr. Sedobla. To sink teeth in in relation to public action doesn't go well, one could say some already sunk their teeth in and that's how it's going, sir.

Sedobla: Uyy, you're right, what custom does to one, right advisor?

Kid: Mister, can we get empanadas?

Sedobla: No, no, no. Not to you, you don't vote.

Advisor: It's better that you give them some, Sedobla. They don't vote but their parents do and they're watching, see?

Sedobla: Uyy you're right, good thing you're on everything, advisor.

Advisor: Modestly.

Sedobla: It was just a joke, heh, take them little one, so you can grow strong for Argentina's future. I love kids more than I love myself, you hear me? Soon I'll give you a pamphlet for my party, heheh, no need to fight, there's for everyone.

Irish: hateful glare (Holy Mother, it's corruption all around. Buying votes with empanadas, how terrible!) BURP (and how bad they sit with me)

Next Sunday: Fallen Image

Sedobla it's a wordplay to se dobla, meaning it bends

Hincar el diente is an expression that can refer to someone who does things enthusiastically or someone who takes what doesn't belong to them. Also consider the previous run-ins with the vampire candidate.

[irish-coffee97]

Irish Coffee #41 (7-9-97)

Y el tiempo sigue, igual que siempre~ (English translation under the cut)

And time keeps going, same as always~

The egg thing is over. The clocks start working again and time flies towards election day. I don't know if this happens to you, but me, everytime we're near to vote, things start to feel not quite right.

Irish: You know what I'd like, Gino?

Gino: What, Irish?

Irish: For politicians to not promise things that they won't make, that they'll give bigger salaries, that they'll kick open factory doors, that everyone will have a job, that poverty will disappear...

-Excuse me, citizen? Sorry but heheh... maybe my face tells you something, I'm the third congressman candidate for...

Irish: Yeah, yeah I've seen you on TV and on panflets, how's it going?

-Well look, I heard what you were saying and I simply want to assure you that I always tell the truth. Seriously. Ask me anything and you will see, just try it...

Irish: Alright... Do you have any projects to help young people get jobs?

-It's not necessary, they'll get old. Any other questions?

Irish: Well... tell me... will you remove the corrupt ones out of the voting lists?

-No way, unfortunally we have many marginalized groups. We can't add a new one to this reality that hits us, do you understand? Here, this is my list, thank you for your time, citizen.

Irish: But wait a moment... this system is unfair.

-And that worries you? Don't they say it doesn't work?

Irish:...... AAAAARGGH!!!!!

Gino: Hold it, Irish, what's wrong?

Irish: oh... I'm- I'm sorry

Gino: Why did you scream like that man?

Irish: And... Why... What am I? La Gata Flora? Just a minute ago I was begging for politicians to tell the truth... And now I rather they lie to me.

Next Sunday: Notice me, hey!

La Gata Flora is a song by Los Gedes and refers to a woman who is quite fickle and contradictory and isn't satisfied with anything lel