Irreverent Tweets

Irreverent tweets about religion that I find funny. Show their creators some love by favoriting and retweeting on your Twitter account via the embedded Twitter buttons. Submit links to your favorite irreverent tweets below.

[irreverenttweets]

ME: I will sell you my soul for $5 and an Arby’s couponTHE DEVIL: $5 *and* an Arby’s coupon? In this economy?

— Bucky Isotope (@BuckyIsotope) November 16, 2015

https://twitter.com/BuckyIsotope/status/666271359643680769

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[heaven orientation]ME: When do we all look down upon our loved ones and smile?ANGEL: Ok I don't know who's telling people that

— Hippo (@InternetHippo) November 22, 2015

https://twitter.com/InternetHippo/status/668440347530231810

[irreverenttweets]

Looks like Mary got that Bontempi Keyboard she was after for Christmas pic.twitter.com/5PQgPx7x40

— Johnfromsoho (@johnfromsoho) November 23, 2015

https://twitter.com/johnfromsoho/status/668855246354038784

[irreverenttweets]

i don't really believe in god but i'm like aware of his influence and respect him as an artist or whatever the hell

— tara shoe (@tarashoe) November 25, 2015

https://twitter.com/tarashoe/status/669365315935932416

[irreverenttweets]

Noah: a giant racecar? Shouldn't I build a boat? God: *jealous he didn't think of that first* ya I was just testing you lol stupid

— PapeяWash© (@PaperWash) November 29, 2015

https://twitter.com/PaperWash/status/670819638767460352

[irreverenttweets]

[the last supper]Waiter: ok, your bill comes to 30 pieces of silverJudas: I got this

— David Hughes (@david8hughes) November 30, 2015

https://twitter.com/david8hughes/status/671345788371394562

[irreverenttweets]

"Why do I always have to choose where we eat" - Eve to Adam

— Megan Amram (@meganamram) November 30, 2015

https://twitter.com/meganamram/status/671414272153489418

[irreverenttweets]

Is it ok if i touch the paintings i have poor eyesight. also i have to have BBQ sauce on my hands because of religion

— dante (online) (@respected_loner) December 8, 2015

https://twitter.com/respected_loner/status/674361304673484804

[irreverenttweets]

*jesus turns water to wine* me: you can't just insert goods into an economy you'll cause deflation Jesus: my child-me: NO! it's bullshit!

— PapeяWash© (@PaperWash) December 10, 2015

https://twitter.com/PaperWash/status/674796346986098690

[irreverenttweets]

Satan: He what?demon: I said he knows if you've been bad or goodS: seriously?D: yesS: [rips Xmas list in half] [runs crying from room]

— Jeff Wysaski (@pleatedjeans) December 10, 2015

https://twitter.com/pleatedjeans/status/675076916907520000

[irreverenttweets]

JESUS: I shall turn water to wineJUDAS: Actually wine is 85% water so that's only 15% miracleJESUS: This is literally the WORST betrayal

— Terry F (@daemonic3) December 11, 2015

https://twitter.com/daemonic3/status/675188689534894082

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GOD: (creates earth) hell yea lizard planet!WINDOWS™: restart planet for important updatesGOD: um ok*dinos die, man appears*GOD: wtf

— Blind Chow (@BlindChow) October 31, 2015

https://twitter.com/BlindChow/status/660286647829995520

[irreverenttweets]

if a bear is attacking you play dead and then play resurrection this will cause the bear to either worship u or deny ur existence

— Eyes Wide Butt (@eyeswidebutt) May 6, 2015

https://twitter.com/eyeswidebutt/status/596014327397769216

[irreverenttweets]

God: kill your son Abraham: uh...ok God: holy shit I'm jk Abraham: umm...God: I'll probably kill mine tho lolAbraham: wtf?

— PapeяWash© (@PaperWash) November 11, 2015

https://twitter.com/PaperWash/status/664592694887452674

[irreverenttweets]

[line to get through pearly gates]St. Peter: Sir, step aside. Random security check.Dude with horns/cloven hooves: RANDOM MY ASS

— Jeff Wysaski (@pleatedjeans) November 13, 2015

https://twitter.com/pleatedjeans/status/665281631792447488

[irreverenttweets]

Imagine if there was a pilot named Pontius? I bet nobody would get on his plane! Haha. That's what I think.

— Jonathan Chase (@jonathanchase_) November 16, 2015

https://twitter.com/jonathanchase_/status/666070122394554369

[irreverenttweets]

[richard dawkins nervously approaches a girl]Want to go out sometime?"No thanks"[he clenches his fists]Religion is responsible for this

— Online Hippo (@InternetHippo) November 17, 2015

https://twitter.com/InternetHippo/status/666764860819030019