Is He An Ass?

Ever picked up a romance novel and wondered...is the hero in this one going to be another asshole? Is there REALLY smut? We're here to help!

[isheanass]

Mangos and Mistletoe by Adriana Herrera 

On Goodreads

Review by Mod E

I completely and totally admit I bought this novella because the setting is a holiday baking competition and there is nothing better than food in my stories. 

Genre/Category: Contemporary F/F plus a little Grumpy/Sunshine

Major Trope: There’s only one bed! 

Is He An Ass? Neither of these characters is an ass (without cause). Kiskeya tends to be a little bit uptight, but Sully barrels through her walls without hesitation.  

Smut? Spicy! This novella isn’t long but they make good use of their one bed ;)

Other thoughts? I loved how they were both allowed to be a little stubborn and hotheaded, which led to some missteps and some lovely moments of understanding between them.  

Final Grade? Yes! 

Required tags: title, author, ISAA, final grade, major trope, heat level

[isheanass]

West Virginia Wild Bear by Becca Fanning

Goodreads Link

Review by Mod E

So, I don’t generally read a ton of shifter romances, as they tend to lean really heavily into the alpha male trope which I’m not super fond of, but I thought I’d give one a try. This particular book has not improved my opinion of the genre. TW for mentions of domestic violence. 

Genre/Category: Shifter/Suspense

Major Trope: Fated mates

Is He An Ass? Yes. Definitely. He’s demanding and aloof, does not give the heroine any reason to love him other than “they’re meant to be” and in one particularly horrifying scene, destroys the heroine’s car (as a bear) so she can’t leave. He’s basically a collection of red flags, and somehow, that’s not the worst thing about this book. 

Smut? N/A I honestly can’t remember an actual sex scene, but that is probably due to the fact that I skimmed a lot of the book desperately hoping it would redeem itself to no avail. 

Other thoughts? The entire premise hinges on the heroine not remembering public transportation exists when she wrecks her car and is stranded, but 3/4 of the way through the book, she finally remembers and buys a bus ticket. 

This is still not the worst thing about this book. 

There’s a subplot involving a diary that details a woman’s struggle with domestic abuse in the last days before her death. Her husband (unbeknownst to her) unexpectedly became a shifter for Plot Reasons. He didn’t deal with it well, and she writes about him as having two personalities, loving and violently angry. Domestic abuse survivors often describe things this way, which makes this an interesting parallel, especially because the hero is also a shifter and an ass. So how does the author explain the difference between the two shifters? By blaming women. The trouble was the dead diary lady wasn’t the bad husband’s “fated mate”, causing him to take out his frustrations on her and ultimately leading to her death, while the hero’s problematic behavior is just...protective. ARE YOU KIDDING ME WITH THIS. 

Final Grade? DON’T

[isheanass]

A First Date with Death by Diana Orgain

Goodreads link

This is definitely more mystery than romance, and I’d argue it doesn’t really deserve a romance label. In theory, this should have been really fun. since it’s a mash-up of a murder mystery and reality show. The heroine ex-cop stars in a Bachelorette-style reality show with ten contestants who begin to die mysteriously. Her ex-fiance, who left her at the altar and is also a cop, shows up undercover to investigate. Why the hell are they continuing a show where everyone is dying? Who knows! Why does she think a cop from one city has the jurisdiction to investigate murders that take place all over the state of California? Not sure! Adds to the mystery, I guess. 

Genre/Category: Mystery Romance, Contemporary 

Major Trope: Contestant on a reality show

Is He An Ass? This is a more complicated question than it should be, mainly because I had NO IDEA who the hero was supposed to be until the last couple of chapters. The ex, who I assumed was supposed to be the hero until the heroine realizes she doesn’t love him 70% of the way in, is awful. The real hero doesn’t have a ton of time on the page so I’m mostly hoping he’s better than the other guy. Let’s go with half an ass.  

Smut? Cold. Barely anything resembling fire in here, despite this supposedly being a takeoff on the Bachelorette TV show and the heroine making out with multiple guys.

Other thoughts? I liked the premise, but for the love of god why keep the reader in the dark about who we’re rooting for the heroine to fall in love with? We never get a satisfactory answer about why the ex left her at the altar, and the surprise hero is a guy she considers a suspect almost until the end. And then they’re in love? Guess nothing says romance like clearing your name of a murder charge! There is so much in here that relies on the reader suspending their belief, it’s like a house of cards built on an unstable foundation over a fault line. And do not even get me started on the ex-cop backstory. At one point the heroine mentions she’d been a cop for years, and yet she shrieks, faints, falsely accuses, and stumbles her way through this investigation like an absolute moron. No wonder she got fired, good lord.

Final Grade? No. 

[isheanass]

King Sized by Madison Faye

<goodreads link>

Review by Mod H

I’d like to point out Mod E made me read this. And yes, the title is referring to what you think it is. 

Genre/Category: Contemporary 

Major Trope: Royals 

Is He An Ass? Not really, but he hardly has enough characterization for me to make a real judgment. 

Smut? On Fire. That’s all this book is. The plot is one-atom thick. 

Other thoughts? This book is hard to review. It’s not really...good? But it does what it sets out to do for the most part. (Here’s my complete goodreads review) It’s a lot of personal taste stuff. Like the overuse of italics drove me bonkers, and the author does this in everything she writes as far as I can tell. (I have this book and the free novellas you get for signing up for her mailing list) I can’t get over the sheer number of these odd, not so great books this author sells. She’s the #8 overall bestselling author on amazon. It boggles my mind. 

Final Grade? Sure, but don’t expect it to be the sort of thing you write home about. 

[isheanass]

Love to Go by Nancy Warren

On Goodreads

Review by Mod E

Imagine the most Oregon romance you could possibly think of, and then multiply it by five and you’re close to what’s in here. There’s a food truck, an organic farmer, hippie moms organizing harvest festivals, an unironic use of the phrase “earth mother”, yoga, pretentious cat names, and Greek food presented as something wild and crazy. I paired this with a delicious Oregon rosé, which was the best thing about this book. 

Genre/Category: Contemporary Oregonian 

Major Trope: Out of her league 

Is He An Ass? Him? No, actually! Her? Yes. At one point she’s on a date with a militant vegan who she makes fun of and I was on board until it’s revealed his food habits are due to medical issues. And near the end of the book, the heroine decides not to be jealous of one of the hero’s employees because the employee is a lesbian. Just...no, that’s not how trust works. 

Smut? Ice Cold. There’s barely even any kissing, and the fade the blacks are more like a door slammed in your face. Nothing even remotely sexy happens until 70% of the way in. 

Other thoughts? The tomato descriptions in here are fab and made me hungry. The over-the-top descriptions of the hero’s beauty got ridiculous after a while and began to feel really fetishized. There’s at least one instance of the word “swarthy” to describe a minor character’s complexion. Oregon, your roots are showing.  

Final Grade? Meh

[isheanass]

Seek & Find by Megan Linden

On Goodreads

Review by Mod E

I thought this would be a nice, fluffy read, and I was not wrong. The trouble is, this book has pretty much zero conflict whatsoever. A political staffer and an ex-SEAL meet in a bar and spend most of the book in a long distance relationship. That’s it, that’s the whole story. I got bored at 60% and skipped to the end. Apparently, I need a little angst in my fluff. 

Genre/Category: Contemporary M/M 

Major Trope: Single dad

Is He An Ass? Nope. No one in this book is an ass. Sam and Blake are very nice people with nice families who love them. Blake’s daughter is very cute and he’s a good dad. 

Smut? Glowing. There’s some on the page sex, but a lot more mentioned in passing.

Other thoughts? I really wish this book had spent more time developing their relationship together instead of so much time telling us about what they were doing when they were apart. They spend a lot of time on the phone and a lot more time missing each other but then their chapters together are all short and perfunctory as they move without a hitch through the stages of their relationship. The balance of political stuff to actual romance felt a little off, since I was here for a romance. 

Pros, as mentioned in a Goodreads review: no one in this is a Republican.  

Final Grade? Meh

[isheanass]

Booty Hunter by KC Cross

<amazon link>

Review by Mod H

I hate to tell you this, but this book is actually good. I liked it. There’s a lot of well-done world building, plot, and characterization. 

It’s also COMPLETELY banana-pants. They’re aliens and the guy has two dicks and the girl glows...especially when she comes. 

I came for the crazy title and stayed for the great storytelling. And the smut. 

Genre/Category: Sci-Fi

Major Trope: Fated Mates

Is He An Ass? For saying Serpint (yes, that’s the hero’s banana-pants name) is billed as an “alpha-male” with an entire wall that can be used as a magnetic restraint, and he’s given Lyra as a present...he’s not really an ass. Even when he has her stay behind near the end it doesn’t come off as him protecting the little lady. None of my red-flag buttons were pressed. 

Smut? Spicy! It’s not non-stop smut, but there are multiple sex scenes and they’re pretty wild.

Other thoughts? This is the first of an 8 book series with an overarching plot, so things are not tied with a bow at the end. There’s a free novella that follows this book and does some further plot set up and is fun to read in its own right. 

Oh, and Booty Hunter is the hero’s ship’s name. And she’s sentient. And has a love interest. 

There’s a potentially crazy AI that’s more than 20,000 years old. 

There are warring planetary systems. 

This book has it all when it comes to Sci-Fi romance. I very much recommend it if that’s your thing! 

Final Grade? Sure! 

[isheanass]

Better to Marry than to Burn by Michal Scott

<amazon link>

Review by Mod H

Passionate Plume Contest: 1 of 3 finalists in Science Fiction, Historical or Time Travel, 3 of 22 overall

Genre/Category: Historical

Major Trope: Marriage of Convenience 

Is He An Ass? This is a fine line, both of the main characters are very strong-willed, but I’m going to go with my gut and say yes. The Hero, when his mail-order bride shows up, starts to really push her towards having children, in a way that made me uncomfortable. I think that if this desire of his had been brought up earlier in the story it would have felt better when he emphasizes it with the not-wanting-to-have-a-child heroine. 

Smut? On Fire, this novella is primarily explicit sex. It was refreshing to read an erotic story with actual erotic content. 

Other thoughts? This is a complex story with an intense battle of wills. It’s not exactly my cup of tea, but it is very well written with excellent erotic content. There is bisexual rep (the Heroine) with the Hero being entirely on board with it, which was a pleasant surprise! 

Final Grade? Sure!

[isheanass]

Stranded with the Seal by Amy Gamet

<goodreads link> 

Review by Mod H

I have another Passionate Plume book I actually finished, because it’s a novella, but I had to read this for a writing seminar this month so here we are. 

I hope this book is an example of what not to do because the pacing is horrible. Really, really bad. The story beats all fall in the wrong place and it made my teeth itch. At least the writing itself wasn’t terrible, which was a relief after the last two books I attempted. 

Genre/Category: Contemporary

Major Trope: forced proximity

Is He An Ass? Yes, I think so? There’s barely enough characterization to say for sure, but the heroine has amnesia and he’s reluctant to tell her she’s engaged, and there’s a lot of him “saving the little lady”, but it’s not as bad as these books can get. 

Smut? Glowing. For saying the point of this novel is that the main characters are snowed in together, there’s only a single sex scene and it’s the kind where the hero doesn’t seem to understand female anatomy. I have no idea how she gets off, but she does. He must just be that manly. 

Other thoughts? The title really irks me. The main character isn’t a SEAL. He was trained, but he’s private military now, not in the Navy. And that private military outfit is called HERO Force. Why? I don’t remember it being defined, but my guess is because someone really wanted the initials to spell out hero. The ending is extremely poorly paced. The couple parts upset at each other, and then there is zero emotional work, they see pictures of each other, and suddenly everything is better. Sigh. Double sigh for the horrible inaccurate depiction of amnesia. 

Final Grade? me

[isheanass]

The Mistwalker by Regine Abel

<goodreads link>

Review by Mod H

I chose poorly, part 3

Passionate Plume Contest 2 of 4 finalists in Paranormal, 2 of 22 overall

I made most of my reading notes public on goodreads, because this was so hilariously bad that writing a real review was too much to ask. LINK. 

This book is so wildly inconsistent I can only imagine that it was written by several drunk chipmunks. 

I noped out at 40%. 

Genre/Category: Paranormal

Major Trope: fated mates

Is He An Ass? Yes, the Mistwalker (pictured above) is somehow wearing a human skin-suit and is courting the main character without her knowing it’s actually him. 

Smut? Spicy in the amount, but whichever inebriated rodent wrote the smutty sections, it needed more practice prior to publication. 

Other thoughts? This was horrible on so many levels. There was a My Immortal level of dedication to describing the character’s clothes every single time they appeared. It was funny for a while, but then it didn’t stop and got annoying. There’s a good premise to this novel, in the hands of a skilled writer it might have been very interesting. Alas, that is not the case. 

Final Grade? DON’T

[isheanass]

Loving Phoenix by Trinity Blacio

<goodreads link>

Review by Mod H

I chose poorly, part 2

Passionate Plume Contest 1 of 4 finalists in Paranormal, 1 of 22 overall 

I not only DNF (did not finish) this book, it is the only Kindle book I have ever returned for credit. It was unreadable. There were multiple typos on every page. A character changed name in the span of five pages. And how did this final in a contest held for EROTIC ROMANCES? There’s one (ONE) insipid sex scene at 93% of the way through the story. (I skimmed through, in case amazing smut saved the rest of the story. It did not). 

Genre/Category: Paranormal. 

Major Trope: Shifters, fated mates

Is He An Ass? I have no idea, but he doesn’t like coffee and calls it nasty, so I’m going to go with yes. 

Smut? Cold. Who reads an erotic romance for no erotic scenes? It’s false advertising, which seems to be today's theme. 

Other thoughts? Anyone out there that reads this series and knows what release The Crackling might be? Is that a thing in this verse? Or was that a typo for Kraken? Even if it’s a thing, the heroine wouldn’t know that because she’s new to town and would need at least an “I’ll explain it later” from someone. 

Final Grade? no

[isheanass]

Fallen by B.J. Daniels

<amazon link> 

Review by Mod H

I chose poorly. 

I a weird coincidence, Mod E was telling me about a string of western romances she likes that are all set in the same town, and the next day I say a giveaway for this author’s newest book (not this one), which is a western/cowboy mystery. I sent Mod E the link and she had a good laugh because it was the same author she’s been talking about the night before. 

It made me curious, so I picked a prequel novella that sounded interesting and that I thought would show me the author’s basic style. That’s what Fallen is, a short prequel to Ms. Daniel’s Beartooth, Montana series. However, the description of the novella is misleading. There’s no central romance with clear main characters. It jumps from POV to POV to show the days leading up to the murder of a 19-year-old girl, which is the central mystery of the first book in the series. (Ten years after it happens) 

The writing style was good, and I think I will continue on and read at least that first novel so I can find out the resolution of the mystery. There are some unintentional (I think) Twin Peaks vibes going on, and that makes my ears perk up. However, I do take offense to this novella itself trying to sell itself as being something it isn’t. It’s not a romance, it’s a mystery with a cliffhanger. If I’d read it for free on the author’s website, I’d feel much kinder towards it than I do. If I’d already read the first novel in the series, I think I also would have enjoyed it more. 

The moral of the story? Don’t start reading B.J. Daniels works with this work! 

Genre/Category: Western, intrigue

Major Trope: small town

Is He An Ass? Someone is, since a girl was murdered, but there’s no central story for me to point at one person and say if they’re okay or not. 

Smut? Cold. There are a few kisses. 

Other thoughts? again, not a romance

Final Grade? No, it’s not necessary to have read this to get into the rest of the Beartooth series. 

[isheanass]

The 14th Annual PASSIONATE PLUME CONTEST for Published Works of Erotic Romance Congratulations to these 2019 Finalists!

Note: Only BDSM had enough novella entries to have their own category. Novellas for other categories were judged with the longer works with authors’ permission.

BDSM (six finalists from tie scores)

Catering to His Demands by Rose C. Carole

Finders Keepers by Jessica Collins

The Gypsy and the Rogue by Claire Thompson

Highland Dom by Marie Tuhart

River of Harmony by Lena Moore

Third Time Lucky by Jennie Kew

BDSM Novella Finalists

All Thorns Eve by Diana Rose Wilson

Bastard’s New Baby by Raisa Greywood

Looking After Lindy by Pepper North

Contemporary (six finalists from tie scores)

Rough and Ready by Cathleen Ross

Spice Island by Saharra K. Sandhu

Still Waters by Jayne Rylon

Tempting Secrets by Michelle Windsor

Top and Tails by Clare London

Unlawful Seduction by Sassy Sinclair

Paranormal

Chastely Bitten by Lexi C. Foss

Loving Phoenix by Trinity Blacio

The Mistwalker by Regine Abel

Resonance by Jennifer Greenhall

Science Fiction, Historical or Time Travel

Better to Marry Than to Burn by Michal Scott

Legion by Regine Abel

Operation Phoenix by Susan Hayes

Winners will be announced on July 1st, 2019. 

[sunalsolove]

The Last Wolf by Maria Vale

<amazon link>

Review by Mod H

I am torn over this novel. The writing is strong and the concept of werewolves is given a unique twist. The characters are interesting and the world building superb. I am planning to purchase the second book in the series on audible when I get my credit tomorrow. However, there the elements that make up a romance novel are hard to see, and there are some violence content warnings that I will put under a read more that make it very hard to for me to recommend this novel. It is up for a 2019 RITA award for best new author. 

Genre/Category: Paranormal

Major Trope: Werewolves, forced proximity 

Is He An Ass? No, Ti is a very complex character, but he is not an ass. He loves and supports the heroine (Silver) unconditionally, and there’s actually a really beautiful character arc for him. It is somewhat stifled because we only see it from the outside. 

Smut? Glowing. There are several sex scenes, not all of which involve simple D in V. I did appreciate that Silver being a werewolf factored into the smut. She’s not quite human and it shows. 

Final grade: a tentative sure

Other thoughts? I’m putting them below a cut. CW for mentions of violence and emesis. Also a spoiler warning. 

Keep reading

[isheanass]

The Duke’s Shotgun Wedding by Stacy Reid

<amazon link>

I wanted a quick, sexy read. What I got was a mess. 

Reviewed by Mod H

Genre/Category: Historical

Major Trope: Love at first sight

Is He An Ass? YES, with so many red flags I’m surprised the heroine didn’t trip over them on the way in. The hero has less than zero communication skills in a whiny, childlike way. He gets mad at her and gives her the silent treatment for ten days at one point. To complete the fact that he’s a little boy, he has terrible mommy issues and a good 50% of this novella are devoted to them. 

Heat level: Spicy, there are multiple graphic sex scenes. However, YMMV on them as they are very poorly written. At one point I counted the word pleasure used six times in two paragraphs. And everyone is constantly having “sensations”, with no descriptions of what kind. Maybe the heroine keeps having an earache. I wouldn’t know. 

Other thoughts? The opening scene of this story is fun, but what they say doesn’t make a lot of sense, and it’s all downhill from there. Nobody’s motives work, and there’s an endless amount of staring out of windows. Seriously, both characters do it frequently. I got the feeling that the author had no idea what normal people of the time period did without TV, so everyone just gazes wistfully or broodingly out windows. 

Final Grade? No

[isheanass]

Baby on His Hollywood Doorstep by Lauri Robinson

(on amazon) 

Review by Mod H

Genre/Category: Historical

Major Trope: Single parent (kind of?) Helen isn’t actually the baby’s mother

Is He An Ass? Yes. Jack starts out okay, but when he calls her stupid and dumb several times and gets upset with her for not knowing that trying to find work would make it look like he couldn’t provide for her, I lost all my faith in the character. 

Smut? Embers. There’s not a whole lot of UST, and an only a tiny bit of kissing for most of the book, until suddenly at 82% of the way through there’s a weirdly graphic sex scene. It doesn’t fit the tone of the rest of the book and sounds like it was written by someone that’s never had sex before. Helen orgasms on her very first time having s/ex through penetration only and Jack magically comes at the same time. It’s a jarring and unnecessary scene. 

Other thoughts? This book is okay, the writing isn’t great, the characters are written unevenly, and the pacing and structure of the story is a mess. There’s some fun with the time period having to do with clothes and silent movies. However, stuff like the mob is heavily romanticized, and there’s not s single character of color to be found anywhere on page. Prohibition is brought up, but then champagne is served openly during a scene and the heroine, who is a daughter of a Chicago crime family, doesn’t wonder where it comes from and drinks it with no questions asked. The entire thing is incredibly inconsistent. There’s a story here, but it needed some serious editing that it didn’t receive. 

Final Grade? meh

[isheanass]

Hell’s Belle by Annabelle Anders

(link to goodreads) 

Review by Mod E

Why yes, I am still working through the RITA finalists and am a sucker for a pun-based title. 

Genre/Category: Historical, finalist in the RITA’s Historical Short Catagory

Major Trope: Fake Marriage turned real

Is He An Ass? Yes, of the dumbass variety. There’s a major plot point that could have been resolved if the hero had bothered to find out what happened to an old flame, but he chose to wallow in his major daddy issues for ten years instead. (Spoiler: he also thought she was pregnant with his child and yet still does not bother to find out what happened. Actually, let’s just upgrade him to full Ass.)

Smut? Glowing. It’s rather euphemistic but there’s a fair amount of it throughout the book, which is fun for a historical.  

Other thoughts? The hero is so dense, he doesn’t even realize he loves the heroine until the last scene after a poisoning/kidnapping/rescue plot that is smushed into the last two chapters and comes totally out of nowhere. Frankly, she deserves better. 

Final Grade? Meh.