“THIS IS ME TRYING” IS NOT ABOUT A FAILING RELATIONSHIP! ITS THE STORY OF HOW JOE AND TAYLOR GOT TOGETHER, BUT TOLD IN REVERSE!!
I've been having a hard time adjusting
I had the shiniest wheels, now they're rusting
Her reputation has been destroyed, Taylor is learning how to function in her new normal
I didn't know if you'd care if I came back
I have a lot of regrets about that
Taylor tried to leave town without saying goodbye, leaving everything behind
Pulled the car off the road to the lookout
Could've followed my fears all the way down
On her way out of town Joe called her (see “Cornilia Street”) and made her realize she was making a mistake.
And maybe I don't quite know what to say
But I'm here in your doorway
Unsure of her future she goes to visit him. He takes her up to the roof where they start their relationship (see “Cornilia Street” / “it’s nice to have a friend”)
They told me all of my cages were mental
It felt like everyone was against her. Everyone was convinced that she was painting herself as a victim and it was all in her head
So I got wasted like all my potential
She went to a dive bar to get drunk
And my words shoot to kill when I'm mad
I have a lot of regrets about that
Taylor burned a lot of bridges too soon when her reputation started falling
I was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere
Fell behind all my classmates and I ended up here
Her peers were envious of her position at the top so they helped to sabotage her or just watched her fall
Pouring out my heart to a stranger
But I didn't pour the whiskey
Meeting Joe at the dive bar, drunkenly telling him all of her life. Literally all of “Gorgeous”
I just wanted you to know that this is me trying x2
Taylor is trying to hold it all together, but it’s a huge burden
And it's hard to be at a party when I feel like an open wound
At the beginning of her downfall she tried to act tough and unaffected
It's hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you
Taylor was infatuated with Joe from the first time they met
You're a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town
Joe is classic, a gentleman, something Taylor finds rare, a flashback to a more romantic time.
In conclusion: this is a backwards love song not a break up song. Taylor is once again a lyrical genius.