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[wethekeegsta]

My dog and my bunny were playing in the back yard and I thought other people might enjoy watching as much as me

[gifaknet-deactivated20181110]

[tastefullyoffensive]

*yoink*

[it25]

Genuine Laughing out Loud

[lolfactory]

Player 3 entered the *boop

➨ funny tumblr ➨ facebook ➨ twitter ➨ pinterest [via imgur]

[it25]

02:00 Thoughts

I'm sitting in my bed reading Tumblr on my iPad because I haven't been on in ages. That's all due to drowning my phone but best not to get on that adventure train tonight! Anyway so I'm browsing Tumblr and I go "oh I haven't seen what my girlfriends posted in a while" so I go have a look. FYI, this isn't some creepy stalker thing, she has her own internet space if she wants it but she likes finding cute things on Tumblr and showing me and I like reading it. Anyhoo; back on topic: So I'm flicking through like a months worth of her life on Tumblr and I'm seeing all these cute things she's been reblogging and it really shows you how a person has thought across a month. (Like of course it's going to be tidied up a little, you won't have her reblogging stuff about shitty boyfriends because she knows I'll see it.....well not unless I've been a really shitty boyfriend and she wants to show me.) You see their little desires and things they've thought about and this month was a whole lot of cute relationship stuff and I'm looking at it and going. "Great! Things are going well! She's happy! I'm doing a good job." BUT Then you start to read the happy relationship stuff and you start to question whether you're doing as well as Handsome Young Dad 1 and Cute Boyfriend 92 and it makes you worry that maybe you're not doing enough. And it makes you really sad. What if I'm becoming complacent? What if she doesn't feel special anymore? We've been together 2.5 years and quickly approaching 3 which is a long time. Not the longest by any stretch but when it's a 7th of your entire life and the first 7th you spent learning to walk, talk eat solids and poo where your supposed to you, you realise quite a lot has happened in that time. This isn't one of those: 'Oh the magics been lost' because: "Fuck No!" The magic is still very much there and abracadabraring the hell out of me! This woman is so incredibly special. Not just to me. She is just as a fact special. My happiness depends upon an 'I Love You'. My day is not complete without talking to her. Without a 'hello' and a 'sweet dreams'. She is the love of my life. I'm just worried I don't show her enough. Life gets in the way sometimes and I feel like I let her down when I choose the easier option. I can be an incredibly lazy guy and the most incredible of procrastinators. I just want her to feel loved all the time. Because she couldn't be more. . . . . . More loved that is.

[it25]

Bums

I think, since what I'm calling the: 'Minaj Effect', a lot of guys are going to get themselves in to trouble. Girl: "Hey do these jeans make my bum look fat?" Boy: *smiles confidently* (he's prepared for this moment). "Of course not sweetie!" Girl: "Oh my god I can't believe you said that!!! I needed your support for like two minutes. Jesus why are you so awful! Boy: (obviously very shocked) "Sweetie what do you mean? You look great." Girl: "Great! Yeah right! How am I going to to win the twerk off against Stacy on Thursday!" Boy: *Freezes in panic* "But.....but....but...." Girl: Yeah I now know it's awful! Thanks for that!" *Runs off slamming doors. Twerk offs are a thing right?

[lolfactory]

God damn it

➨ funny blog

[via imgur]

[it25]

Incredible

[lolfactory]

This is what a stable relationship looks like

☆ funny pictures

[it25]

For Louise

[it25]

Rewarding

Love isn't all kisses and cuddles it's hard work. Sometimes the hardest work. But it is the most rewarding work you can do. To succeed is to secure yourself happiness.

[it25]

Sometimes you got to be that guy...

[haze-gre]

i think if the outcome of an election makes this many people want to protest and just generally cry at the thought of another 5 years of this shit then something has gone seriously fucking wrong

[it25]

Have to remember we tend to surround ourselves with like minded people and the Internet (especially tumblr) has young people as their most active users. So just because you’re reading a lot of hate against the Tories and those around you are feeling much the same doesn’t mean it’s quite as many people as you think.

My lot are genuinely quite happy.

[haze-gre]

I don’t live in a very wealthy area (the people with money are the ones that want the Tories basically) and now my dads going to loose his job because they feel the need to cut everything and my mum also might loose her job and benefits are being cut as well and since I can’t work we will be fucked. Tories have no concept of what it is like for a normal person trying to make a living, they think we can survive on the minimum wage or job seekers but it is nearly impossible. There’s already way too much poverty in the UK and I don’t want it to get worse, and chances are now it will

[it25]

I don’t know your personal situation but Government cuts only affect the Public Sector, those who work for the government. Minimum wage goes up every couple of years. Has done under the coalition, will likely under Cons now. And let’s face it. No political party knows what it’s like to live a normal life. Labour still went to posh schools as did the others.

[haze-gre]

At least with labour my parents wouldn’t be out of work

[it25]

Please explain how a government getting elected and your parents losing their jobs is going to have a direct correlation.

[haze-gre]

i think if the outcome of an election makes this many people want to protest and just generally cry at the thought of another 5 years of this shit then something has gone seriously fucking wrong

[it25]

Have to remember we tend to surround ourselves with like minded people and the Internet (especially tumblr) has young people as their most active users. So just because you’re reading a lot of hate against the Tories and those around you are feeling much the same doesn’t mean it’s quite as many people as you think.

My lot are genuinely quite happy.

[it25]

Just my two cents into the void of unintelligible chatter about the election. The last government just gone have done an incredibly good job with what they had at hand. We have a very strong economy which is something we need to continue our development and improvement. The opposition wanted to do, well, the complete opposite which would have likely led to us being dragged down or stagnated like the rest of the EU. As for all those last 5 'terrible years' everyone keeps talking about. The problems you face on a day-to-day basis are unlikely to be the cause of the government. While I'm sure many have their negative opinions of the conservatives grounded in personal experience (they can't please everyone) others are without a doubt based on inherited ideological hatred and firm party loyalty. Also based on this deluded class conflict that apparently is hidden in their policies. Conservatives have won which I believe is the best outcome we had on offer.

[it25]

Annnnnd now I'm fine again. What is life!

[it25]

Never felt more trapped in my life. Stuck between what's good for them, what's good for her and how to make others happy. But I'm not. Many things are good in my life and I'm very appreciative of those that are. But I am not happy. I am anxious. I am stressed. And I am scared.

[it25]

Stuck in the Middle With You (Parody)

I decided to right a parody. Find yourself the music for the song by Stealers Wheel and feel free to sing along.

Stuck Inside of You

Well, I did not expect this tonight, Your naked body, a hell of a sight. So excited I just grabbed a tube To my horror found it wasn’t lube. Penis stuck in condom, condom stuck it’s true. Here I am stuck inside of you.

Yes I am stuck inside of you. Got lube mixed with super glue. Your face when you notice me stop, I was worried you’d give me the chop! Penis stuck in condom, condom stuck it’s true. Here I am stuck inside of you.

Well we head for the hospital, Hoping to get this sorted out.

Doctors came at us laughing, and I just started crying. Please, Please help.

So the doctors got out a cloth, And they covered it in some kind of froth. They rubbed it where it needed to go, And I pulled out…but real slow. Condom stuck to you, nothing stuck to me. Here I am, finally free from you.

Well now they lie you down, And wheel you away up the hall.

I hear your shouts of anguish and your cries at them saying: Please, Please help.

Well, I did not expect this tonight, Sitting in a hospital awaiting a fight. You must know that I’m really sorry. Sex with me will now always come with worry. Sick to the left of me, injured to the right. Here I am stuck in the waiting room. Yes I am stuck in the waiting room. Here I am stuck in the waiting room. Yes I am stuck in the waiting room.

[4gifs]

Chicken police. [video]

[it25]

Broke my reblog vow... But I had to!

[it25]

Mistakes

Why are mistakes measured by their consequences? If I have to choose between a blue jelly bean and a red jelly bean, both promising a delightful flavour within. But threatening a vomit inducing alter-ego. And I choose wrong, my mistake is a laughable one. Maybe not laughable straight away, when I spit it out into my friends face and down toothpaste to take the taste away. But funny eventually. A silly mistake. What if we change it a little? I have to choose between two identical nuts, both promising to hold during the ignition of a rocket destined for the moon. But threatening to crack and change the rocket's destination for 100 metres above its launching platform, where it will then detonate. And I choose the wrong. My mistake is not longer laughable. Both were the same mistake however. A 50/50 choice that I made wrong. The issue is people seem to think that when you get greater and greater responsibility, you are no longer allowed to make mistakes. Once you've gotten to a position of authority you are no longer a human but an infallible machine. Until of course you do make a mistake. And then people start to see you as a broken machine in need of replacing. Now granted some mistakes should be punished if they are more than just a mistake. The banking crisis for example happened because of greed; not because someone misplaced a decimal point. But it's always heartbreaking to me that people demand others be fired for mistakes that were minor. They may have had horrific consequences, but the human error itself, was no different than a typo in an essay. For example: People should not demand a doctor to lose their job if they misdiagnose 1 patient out of 1000. Even if it leads to a death. It may sound appalling. You may disagree. But we are all human. Last time you drove a car you may have forgotten to indicate once. It didn't lead to a car crash so the mistake is classed as minor. But what if it had lead to a crash? And what if someone had died? Now the mistake is serious, people demand would demand you lose your licence or even go to prison. The mistake hasn't changed. The consequences did. We are all human. Please don't forget that.