Chef Aussie

The name's Austin and I am a foodie living a gay life... I also like long walks on the beach, piña coladas... just kidding.

[chekhov]

It’s -10 outside please stop wearing basketball shorts. We get It you’re straight

[dizstorted-deactivated20250423]

[wenchyfloozymoo]

[yuripink]

i feel like im in the sims where it takes 5 hours to make pasta and then u have to immediately go to bed

[memewhore]

[childhoodruiner]

Retweet

[imoverallofit]

Sheeeiiit

[aadennn]

Okuurrrrr

[mogifire]

[pussyadvice-deactivated20200825]

my friends: are u okay

me: yep

(me internally): Its such bullshit that people consider artists like Ariana Grande or Lana Del Rey feminist in anyway just cause they mentioned pussy in like one song and no one ever talks about Lily Allen anymore who even back on her first couple of albums was making songs with some actual real feminist sentiments (as far as pop music goes) such as: 

Ruining your boyfriends life after he cheated on you and gaslighted you (on the Smile video)

Talking about wanting to punch out dudes that bother her and her friends in bars and wont take no for an answer (Knock Em Out)

Mocking some dude who things he’s big shit for being awful in bed and having a tiny penis (Not Big)

Making fun of her brother for being a loser who just smokes weed in his room all day and doesn’t have a job (Alfie)

Refusing to accept an annoying ex-boyfriend back in her life (Absolutely Nothing)

About consumerism and what being trained to be vapid does to you (The Fear)

Another one about a dude who’s just terrible in bed (Not Fair)

The fact that women, especially models are considered old and their careers’ pretty much over if they didn’t make it big by the time they’re 30 and that after that point they should just get married to some rich guy (22)

About feeling like she’s grown as a person and feels finally free after letting go of an awful relationship she was in (I Could Say)

Apologizing to her sister for treating her badly during their childhood out of jealousy (Back To The Start)

 An Anti-homophobia statement calling out bigots and literally telling them to fuck off (Fuck You)

[uwiguwi]

if you’re reading this

a lump sum of money is on the way to you

[squidyword]

*missed phone call from work*

me: ugh if they’re asking me to come in I’m not gonna do it 

*phone call from work*

manager: hey can you come in today

me: yeah, sure I’ll be there in a bit

[aspirationalbrand]

reese witherspoon throwing ice cream at meryl streep on the set of big little lies season two

[rebonkas]

i thought that this was just reese witherspoon living her life tbh

[arandomthot]

Making conversation can be tougher than it seems

[nessaaageee]

This one time at work, I was training someone and the system froze so I decided to have some small talk and I asked her if she had any kids or anything (she was older) and she started crying. She asked me if it was cool if she went to take a walk to get some air and I told her okay because I mean what was I supposed to say? Anyways, she came back clearly still upset and told me that her husband left her for one of her daughters.

After that, I kept all my conversations strictly work related.

[hameenahatesyou-deactivated2023]

👀

[skinoutqueen]

Bitch whet

[the-howling-storm]

[clockworkmachineking]

[jeremymfhill]

[la-roseoftexas]

I once had a customer ask for a drink and asked me to add extra vodka because she had a bad day. I had the bartender do it for free (because my brother was bartending) and I brought it back and asked her what was her bad day (because usually it’s like work sucked, just a long day, or they work at the hospital nearby) and her sister shook her head at me and the customer goes “our dad died today” and I just went “oh my god do you want some soup” because I’m an idiot

[albertothechihuahua]

this is the money dog, repost in the next 24 hours and money will come your way!!

[jaxblade]

ehh what the hell

[jaxblade]

OH MY GOD SO NO FUCKIN BULLSHIT I SWEAR To GOD. I reblogged this an hour ago and IM NOT Lying My Tax Refund which I did in late march popped into my Bank Account, and it was a Decent sized amount……

WHAT THE FUCK Is THIS MAGIC!??!?!?! Im trying this again IM NOT BSing hahahaha thats actually pretty cool xD

[jaxblade]

yooooo

yoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

FUCKIN YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

no BULLSHIT I KID YOU NOT! Look what I found while walking Home…..

OH MY GOD

OH MY F*CKIN GOD

THIS POST FUCKIN WORKS?!?!?! THIS IS PAST A COINCIDENCE NO WAY!??! NO FRIGGIN WAY!!! 

Im Going to reblog this every day to test this, its MAGIC ITS FRIGGIN MAGIC 

[que-pasadena]

I need to believe in the heart of the post…

[perlexnoire-deactivated20150716]

Oh? Well… *reblag*

[zer0will2live]

i reblogged this and now my uncle is giving me 250 to dye my hair nani the fucko

[qslay]

I have nothing to lose

[stoicdaydreamer]

my palm was itchin today not riskin it

[astripperstory]

I always reblog the money posts cause I can’t afford not too lol

[brownsugarempress]

It works. I just got $300 for no reason.

[thecrybabbles-deactivated201605]

Money dog is my friend

[yeaimcoollikethat-deactivated20]

Money dog is the shit

[anttom2016-blog]

I believe in the money dog😀

[princedhunglow-deactivated20181]

I believe in the money 🐶

[cosmic-noir]

Bless me pls money pup 🙏🐕

[crip-jesus-deactivated20190301]

Just woke up 🙌🏿

[totheonedegree]

Pplease😭🙏🏽

[marvelismylife]

Doing this again because last time I reblogged this I got $50

[roses-likethis-blog]

can’t not reblog the money dog

[conquerchaos]

Someone handed me 20 bucks today to donate to charity!

[ilosemygrip-myfocus]

I’m always so skeptical about these things but also desperate so why not

[naturally-twisted-deactivated20]

The way my bank account about to look after I pay rent…I ain’t got shit to lose🤧

[naturally-twisted-deactivated20]

SOOOOO REAL SHIT I GOT THE JOB I APPLIED FOR YESTERDAY‼️ THE MONEY DOG IS REAL BABYYY 😭

[airjanareiofanpagggeee]

@airjanareiofanpagggeee

[v171]

One time I was playing the sims and I wanted to make me and mike but I wanted to make us separately and have us meet. But when I moved into my house, I had this sexy ass neighbor. I figured I could have a fling with him and break it off and get with Mike later but then the neighbors kid got attached to me and I couldn’t just end it when I was so close to his daughter. I really cared about him too.

So the only thing I could do was have it end in tragedy. That way I wouldn’t have to break up with the guy and I could adopt his daughter to stay close to her. He passed away peacefully on fire in the kitchen. Now in previous games, when a kid is taken away by CPS, the next kid you adopt is the same kid. Welp that didn’t carry over into sims 4 so the daughter ended up being taken away and erased from the game by the great sims deity.

I’m a sentimental man, so I kept neighbor mans tombstone around. I’d occasionally chat with his ghost, but he seemed cold to me. I can’t help but thinking he was a bit mad his daughter no longer existed. But this escalated once I started seeing Mike. His ethereal visits became more frequent and more hostile, usually breaking my electronics or creating a mess. But he went overboard when he started the fire.

Being a sim the died in a fire, his ghost had certain abilities specific to his death (setting fires). He got pissed because I kissed Mike so he set my couch on fire that ended up barricading us in the bedroom. Now I couldn’t find the fire alarm in buy mode and I hadn’t had the foresight to predict my spiteful ghost died-in-a-fire ex boyfriend would be an afterlife arsonist to care about it that much so a lot of the house had burned by the time I could get the FD there.

After having almost nothing covered by insurance (thanks Obama), Mike sat me down to have a talk with me. While I couldn’t understand him, I imagine he said “What the fuck you need to deal with your crazy ass ex boyfriend ghost. This never would have happened if you weren’t a thirst little sim bitch and dated me first.”

I approached the grave. It was time to release him. He was waiting for me. He knew this was the end. That after this, there was no coming back from the afterlife. I know he tried to kill me, and he knows I got his daughter deleted, but at that moment, it was just like old times. Telling each other jokes 27 times in a row until he would have sex with me.

We had a final ghostly embrace and he was gone. I sold his tombstone for 300 bucks and bought a microwave.

[que-mystery]

I enjoyed this more than the last season of AHS

[breefolk-hates-staff]

“He died peacefully on fire in the kitchen.”

[mxnrique]

roseanne: i’m sorry for my racist-ness. i’ve been taking ambien!

the creator of ambien:

[leoreturns-deactivated20110811]

I have been waiting all year to post this.

[tumboner]

omg

[merspers]

This has been in my queue for months.

[mcgooglykins]

I missed it last year and I vowed that would NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.

[thatsoundsprettynice]

YES

[xbstnmnr-deactivated20241116]

omg i didnt reblog this last year!

[itschefausblog]

Literally pouring down raining in Rhode Island right now though *long eye roll*

[albertothechihuahua]

this is the money dog, repost in the next 24 hours and money will come your way!!

[jaxblade]

ehh what the hell

[jaxblade]

OH MY GOD SO NO FUCKIN BULLSHIT I SWEAR To GOD. I reblogged this an hour ago and IM NOT Lying My Tax Refund which I did in late march popped into my Bank Account, and it was a Decent sized amount……

WHAT THE FUCK Is THIS MAGIC!??!?!?! Im trying this again IM NOT BSing hahahaha thats actually pretty cool xD

[jaxblade]

yooooo

yoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

FUCKIN YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

no BULLSHIT I KID YOU NOT! Look what I found while walking Home…..

OH MY GOD

OH MY F*CKIN GOD

THIS POST FUCKIN WORKS?!?!?! THIS IS PAST A COINCIDENCE NO WAY!??! NO FRIGGIN WAY!!! 

Im Going to reblog this every day to test this, its MAGIC ITS FRIGGIN MAGIC 

[que-pasadena]

I need to believe in the heart of the post…

[perlexnoire-deactivated20150716]

Oh? Well… *reblag*

[zer0will2live]

i reblogged this and now my uncle is giving me 250 to dye my hair nani the fucko

[qslay]

I have nothing to lose

[stoicdaydreamer]

my palm was itchin today not riskin it

[astripperstory]

I always reblog the money posts cause I can’t afford not too lol

[brownsugarempress]

It works. I just got $300 for no reason.

[thecrybabbles-deactivated201605]

Money dog is my friend

[yeaimcoollikethat-deactivated20]

Money dog is the shit

[anttom2016-blog]

I believe in the money dog😀

[princedhunglow-deactivated20181]

I believe in the money 🐶

[cosmic-noir]

Bless me pls money pup 🙏🐕

[crip-jesus-deactivated20190301]

Just woke up 🙌🏿

[totheonedegree]

Pplease😭🙏🏽

[marvelismylife]

Doing this again because last time I reblogged this I got $50

[roses-likethis-blog]

can’t not reblog the money dog

[everydayery]

REBLOG HELP ME MONEY DOG

[heavenspeach]

My bank account needs you money dog

[vesblkboi24]

Money dog