Retro. Mostly. @hawkuletz - Tumblr Blog

hey boss can you show me where the forklift's self-destruct is so i can keep it from falling into the hands of enemy warehouse crews?

meowingatthesea

depsidase

how quaint.

sexhaver

it's extremely funny reading historical accounts of Spontaneous Human Combustion because it follows the normal historical trend of other 1800s paranormal phenomena where it stopped happening as much right around the time cameras were invented and stopped happening entirely when everyone started carrying mini cameras in their pockets, but unlike most others of its ilk, it was effectively replaced by this mysterious phenomena where alocoholics would spill liqour on themselves and then fall asleep smoking a cigarette and turn into a fireball. nobody knows if these two things are related

fullmetalwindbreaker

lakevida

thequeeninyellowlace

postcard-from-the-past

Railway station of Garches, western suburbs of Paris

French vintage postcard

ltwilliammowett

Cross Sea- Photo taken from Phares des Baleines (Lighthouse of the Whales) on Île de Ré, by Michel Griffon 2011

Cross sea is an unusual, rare but nevertheless very dangerous wave pattern. It occurs when waves from different directions meet (cross) each other. The overlapping of these wave systems creates a chessboard-like pattern, which on the one hand has an enormous suction and the waves, created by the overlapping, can suddenly become 10 metres and more. This pattern is able to drown swimmers in shallow coastal areas and sink ships in deeper areas.

creature-adjacent

Carnivorous plants doin this is so funny to me

They don't wanna eat their pollinators :(

questionablepastries

hawks-alphonse

wholesome-animal-images

jollyrancher33

Yuuuup

ghostriderskull

betweenheroesandvillains

petition to make Americans google “euro” before writing fic

supportive-snapmaw

If you can roll up a coin you deserve to snort coke imo

ghstbusting

tag credit to @teashoesandhair

kremlin

while jamming my entire body between two closing elevator doors today, i was met with wide eyes, and i thought to myself "this probably looks frightening to people that don't have a thorough technical understanding of how elevators work and the history behind why they are so insanely safe"

and then i remembered the story of the tenured civil engineering professor who, with a running start, would leap and throw himself full-force at skyscraper windows in order to demonstrate their structural properties, until one day the window popped out of the frame, unbroken of course, and he fell to his death

dragon-in-a-fez

actual image I have just seen on an actual website attempting to sell travel packages. welcome to our plane where there's no aisle so you have to climb over seats if you're not in the first row. the pilot has no legs and is joined to one of the passengers at the wrist.

dying

That means you’ll get to meet him soon!

i-cant-think-of-anything-to-say

hunting down Tumblr posts i see on Pinterest part 572

finnglas

when i was a tiny baby queer (aka a 24-year-old), i went to my first pride festival probably three months after i kicked ex-gay therapy to the curb and came out to my parents. being the people they are, my parents came with me. they weren’t really sure about this whole gay thing, but they loved me and wanted me to be safe and happy and wanted to be involved in what was important to me, so they came along. (i also think my mother still might have thought i might get drugged or murdered or beaten by a protester of which there were plenty.)

anyway i wanted a memento of my first pride, you know, and this one vendor was selling keyrings, and i liked it, so i bought one. do you remember those italian charm bracelets that were all the rage like 10-15 years ago? it was a keychain like that, and it had a rainbow rooster, a rainbow cat, and then just a rainbow, and so I bought it.

i run into my mom a couple of vendors over and she goes oh you bought something? what’d you get? so i showed her, and i was like, “I’m not sure why it’s a rooster and a cat. Seems kind of random. But I liked the rainbows.”

and my mom, who was some form of minister’s wife for most of my childhood and teenagerhood, stares at me like she thinks i’m joking.

“What?” i say.

“…it’s a cock and a pussy, Jules,” she says flatly, and that is the story of how i died at the age of 24 while attending my first pride festival.

finnglas

I love how every June this one gets dug up and passed around again, lmao.

finnglas

oh no is this what we’re doing now