cherry valley forever
h
will byers stan first human second
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

JBB: An Artblog!
art blog(derogatory)
Xuebing Du
Peter Solarz
d e v o n
Misplaced Lens Cap
KIROKAZE
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

if i look back, i am lost
ojovivo
AnasAbdin

Andulka

tannertan36
No title available
One Nice Bug Per Day
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
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@itsmagnetsbabey
hiatus
OKAY BOOS i am dropping this here just so no one thinks i am ignoring them, but i’m taking a BIT of a step back from this blog bc im a little overwhelmed with things! in a good way! but i’ve found it hard to keep up with how many AWESOME and AMAZING muns are here! ive found it a little less stressful to RP in group situations so you can find me over at GENOSHAHQ if youd like to keep rping! @phoenixrisesx @nxtsoordinary @originalbirdboy @cardshcrp @lordofthefuckingwasteland @thedevilwithyelloweyes and bee!!!! plz get with me if u would be interested in having a charles in ur rp! and im doing this stream of conscious so i likely forgot a ton of amazing important people so plz dont take offense if ur an xmen blog i frequent and ur not on this list! i am sleeping meds right now and a confirmed dumb ass Im gonna leave this blog up because I will probably rediscover this muse later on and I really enjoy everything on here!
the real tragedy of xmen is that magneto is in love with a liberal
@itsmagnetsbabey
Starring Erik as GROMP MAN
#when your girlfriend/wife is a dork
@itsmagnetsbabey
#m2 jean and erik are amy and jake
i REFUSE to prove you wrong
Cat Cat Cat! Purim is coming up soon. Can you tell us the Purim story, with swears?
oh my god, is this my thing now. OKAY, fair warning, this one’s gonna be… real long.
OKAY SO LIKE. way back in the waybackwhen, we’ve been kicked outta judea for the… first? second? first time. (we got kicked out of israel/judea a… few times. we got kicked out of spain twice, we got kicked out of the netherlands three times, we got kicked out of france and bavaria five times, we got kicked out of mainz in particular four times
god bless the gentiles honestly they’re god’s appointed travel agency. ANYWAY)
so we’re in persia. and we’re under the rule of king ahasueare– king ahahasay– king ahasueueueueue-
KING AHASARARUARAUAEREASS, who is having a Party
and king ahdahahaah has a wife, vashti, who is among the hottest women in the whole country. like. picture michelle obama crossed with robin wright. sort of like a 40-year-old raven symone. are you picturing it? good. king ashashsasd isn’t. cos she’s hiding in her room
king aheshhh, who is quite drunk at this point, is like VASHTI. VASHTI I WANT YOU TO COME OUT AND HAVE FUN AT THIS PARTY. I WANT YOU TO COME OUT AND HAVE FUN AND WEAR YOUR CROWN
vashti is like ughhhhhhhh FINE
king aaaaaaahhahaha is like …ONLY YOUR CROWN
vashti is like …not fine
so, because this is ancient persia and men are terrible, vashti is promptly divorced and king aughjesus decides to hold the Country’s Biggest Beauty Contest, where the Most Beautiful Women in Persia will all audition to be his wife!!! (I TOLD YOU MEN WERE TERRIBLE)
BUT. WAITAMINUTE. PAN OVER PERSIA AND IN ON
haman, a smug motherfucker with a three-pointed hat, size 7, and a zero-pointed ego, size 300; a councillor for the king. haman, because ancient persia does not have any kind of government that could reasonably be labeled “sensible”, writes and institutes a law that says Everyone In This Country Must Bow Down To Me When I Pass, because Reasons.
BUT, guess who does not bow down to people, you guessed right, it is the jews. chiefly and specifically in this instance an equally smug (but much less powerful) motherfucker by the name of mordecai.
haman passes mordecai, is like “you don’t look like you’re bowing??? that is not a bow shape??? exPLAIN.” mordecai is like “r u god? i don’t think yr god? i think god would have better taste in hats? so”
and haman is IRKED but THEN mordecai overhears two courtiers having a conversation that goes something along the lines of:
COURTIER ONE: i am going to kill the king
COURTIER TWO: wow, what a coincidence, so am i
COURTIER ONE: lots of killing. like. a bunch. so much of the being killed is going to happen
COURTIER TWO: great plan.
and mordecai is like, well. that’s not good, but also… that’s good… because i’m gonna go and. tell the king. that’s a thing i’m gonna do, right now, and the king is like SHIT!!! THAT SOUNDS IMPORTANT, SOMEONE GO KILL THOSE DUDES, and those dudes are gone killed
and the king goes to haman, our motherfucker with the terrible hat, and goes “theoretically, my bro. if there was a dude so fab you had to honor him, like, the most. how would you do that thing” and haman’s like “ah! this theoretical person! definitely not me! i would, theoretically, give that person a fuckton of money and also fancy clothes and also tell the kingdom that they were the best in persia. that is what i would do for mys- for them.”
“GREAT” says the king. “OKAY GO AND DO THAT FOR MORDECAI SG? SG”
…anyway haman is plotting like a motherfucker, which he is, and mordecai is mad afraid, but there is no time for plotting or fear because guess what it’s beauty contest time, motherfuckers
and guess who mordecai has enrolled in it, it is HIS NIECE, ESTHER
esther is hotter than vashti, but, like, in a chiller way. in my head, samira wiley. (in my head, esther is a lesbian. in my head esther is my girlfriend. right. ANYWAY)
king ahooleyhoo immediately picks esther, as she is the Most Beautiful Woman In A Ten Thousand Mile Radius (as are all jews OBVIOUSLY), and she is taken up into the palace to be the most beautiful and powerful woman in a ten thousand mile radius. and she is also mad smart, so
what does a mad smart woman do? a mad smart woman does not tell her new husband, the king of the persians, that she is jewish. that is a smart move.
meanwhile haman has finished his Plotting and has resulted in this: he is going to get revenge against mordecai by Killing All The Jews.
“oh yeah,” say the jews. “real original.”
meanwhile esther is wandering around in king asdfasdfasdf’s palace, where there is literally no kosher food, because the only people who could order kosher food prepares specially would be a) the king (who does not know she is a jew) or b) haman (who is a motherfucker).
so esther’s eating seeds and nuts and gettin increasingly hungry and increasingly irritated and eventually she’s like, HUSBAND DARLING, CAN I SEE MY UNCLE; the king says yes, upon which mordecai is like ESTHER? ESTHER HAMAN IS PLOTTING TO KILL US ALL. ALL THE JEWS. DO SOMETHING
esther is like, i have a solution to this. the solution involves getting naked.
so she holds a banquet for her husband the king, and at the banquet is like WOW… GOSH… I’M VERY NAKED… AT THIS BEAUTIFUL BANQUET WITH KEGSTANDS. WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE A LOT OF SEX AND GOOD FOOD, DARLING HUSBAND
darling husband is like fuck yes, gets drunk as shit. esther is like okay. yes. now that you are full of good food and heavily sexed up, can i have a thing. can that thing be that you vow to protect me from anyone who wants to kill me
…sure, says king aheshehaara. i mean. as things to ask for go. that went
great, says esther. havin a banquet tomorrow night too. be there or be square
king ajldfghfdghk;dfghufgsdoi has no desire to be square, so he comes to the banquet tomorrow night to find that esther has also invited… HAMAN? “well,” he thinks to himself, “i have never pictured this threesome before, but y’know what, life is a rich tapestry”
but they are eating? and not sexing? and eventually esther goes “ah okay remember that promise to protect me from anyone who would kill me. what if i told you. i knew a dude who would do that thing”
“I WOULD SUPER KILL THAT DUDE,” says king ahassafrass, who has exactly 2 problem-solving methods
“great,” says esther. “what if i told you… THIS IS THE DUDE”
!!!!! says king ahahahahhfewsse.
!!!!!! says esther.
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡ says haman.
so esther REVEALS SHE IS A JEW! and that haman is implicitly PLOTTING TO KILL HER! (“i didn’t– I WAS NOT AWARE,” says haman. “WELL MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE FUCKING CHECKED THEN,” says esther. “OR WAIT. ANOTHER SOLUTION. IT’S DAWNING ON ME. AN EPIPHANY. YOU COULD TRY NOT KILLING PEOPLE”)
and the king has haman hanged on the gallows on which he was planning to hang all the jews. and guess who is instituted as councillor in his place, that’s right, IT’S MORDECAI
who declares that the anniversary of Us Not Being Dead shall be celebrated every year forever with dressing up in costumes, and also that we shall eat little cookies shaped like haman’s hat, and also that whenever haman’s name is mentioned we will yell like hell
hey, says king aharseadslic. could, theoretically, this holiday include getting so drunk you can’t tell the difference between mordecai and haman
…i guess so, says mordecai
right, says king ahasuerus. carry on, haman
AND SO WE CONTINUE THESE TRADITIONS OF EATING COOKIES, WEARING COSTUMES, AND GETTIN SLOSHED, even SCATTERED ACROSS THE WORLD; and yes, i will be spending my thursday gettin drunk on my way to rome
so pour yrself a whiskey, put on a fake beard, and raise a glass: it’s purim 5776, and guess what, motherfuckers?
you still ain’t managed to kill us yet.
let him live
@itsmagnetsbabey
jfiosdhiog halp
@itsmagnetsbabey
Teachings of Surak: the principle philosophy of the Vulcans (Vulcan to English)
Nar-tor pulaya s'au k'ka'es - k'el'rular tun-bosh: Accept their reaching in the same way - with careful hands
Dom nam-tor vohris nem-tor ha'kiv: Then be slow to take life.
Dakh pthak. Nam-tor ri ret na'fan-kitok fa tu dakh pthak: Cast out fear. There is no room for anything else until you cast out fear
Ri klau au ik klau tu: Do no harm to those that harm you
Vah mau vah tor-yehat ri stau: As far as possible, do not kill
Variben veh sochya kuv nam-tor vah goh yut ha-tor: He talks peace if it is the only way to live
Shiyau thol'es k'thorai ri k'ahm: Nobility lies in action not in name
Nufau au sochya - yi dungi ma tu sochya: Offer them peace - then you will have peace
Pulau na'vathular k'nuhk: Reach out to others courteously.
Spunau bolayalar t'Wehku bolayalar t'Zamu il t'Veh: The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few or the one.
I'wak mesukh-yut t'on: The present is the crossroads of both (future and past)
Tilek svi'khaf-spol t'vathu - tilek svi'sha'veh: The spear in the other’s heart is the spear in your own
Nam-tor ri thrap wilat nem-tor rim: There is no offense where none is taken
Ri vath kau eh ri vath rok nam-tor na'etek hi etek kau-tor: There is no other wisdom and no other hope for us but that we grow wise
Nam-tor wak vah yut s'vesht na'fa'wak heh pla'rak: Time is a path from the past to the future and back again
Ma etek natyan teretuhr lau etek shetau weh-lo'uk do tum t'on: We have differences. May we, together, become greater than the sum of both of us
Eik-veshtaya to'ovau kau - lu veshtaya ri glazhau goh na'kastorilaya t'kashan: Wide experience increases wisdom, provided the experience is not sought purely for the stimulation of sensation.
you call it “really bad at darts”, I call it freestyle acupuncture
Sir I’m going to have to ask you to leave the bar
WE'VE SENT PLANES TO KILL THEM AND SOME OF THEM ARE CHILDREN/UNDER G-D BUT WE KILL LIKE THE SON OF SAM/NEGLECTING THE VICTIMS AND ORDERING THE COPS TO SHOOT/PUT YOUR HANDS UP AND I'LL COPY YOU
(there will come a soldier) i thought you were civilian!
Charles let Erik pull him up, but he kept a hold of him as he looked around. The rush of thoughts and awareness through Erik nearly dulled out the new awareness he was feeling through his own power. It was dizzying. But along with Erik’s abilities in Charles’ head was the buzz of life in the air, in the earth, on the earth, all around. From the insects in the earth to the birds in the sky, the people back in Haifa, he could feel them all. “Not the same as you,” he answered. “I feel yours, but mine- do you feel mine? The insects and the animals. Christ. We are stronger.” He squeezed Erik’s hand tightly. “This… is going to take some getting used to.” This was madness. He’d have thought it was a dream were it not for the warmth of Erik’s hand in his own and the other man’s thoughts floating around in his head as well.
the jeep flicked on suddenly and rolled back toward them, doors opening. there’s none of the jerky stuttering halt of erik’s powers before-the barely-leashed energetic potentials, this is all deliberate and refined, his control a well-polished blade of intention. erik remembers the first time he realized what he could do-the power that came with it, the knowledge that he would never again be in a position of systematic, mindless death-that he could use his gifts to ensure that no one ever faced it again- and then the slow dawn that, well, he wasn’t that great at magnetic manipulation. things moved when they wanted to. his will was only effective some of the time. he looks at charles, unconsciously sifting through his perceptions, wondering if he’s thinking the same thing-of all the regrets he’s had, missteps taken while developing, or if he’s always been this telepathically unflappable. he just grins and says, “OK, so we’ll get used to it.” there was something solid about that. reassuring. that seemingly they’d come to a mutual decision to stay in one another’s orbits for the foreseeable future-the idea of ending their association had a pin put in it, and that was a weight off of everything.
you keep me there
A mental hum drifted through the connection as he considered the question. “…vor dreißig Jahren?” Something like that. It warmed him to see Erik’s response to the school. Charles took great pride in the school and in his students and teachers. This was his life’s work. It meant everything to him. Suddenly, though, he was being drawn deeper into Erik’s mind. Seeing where he grew up, how he grew up was fascinating, but heartbreaking for the way Erik was kept from using his gift. He’d had to hide himself, unlike the children at the school. It made sense now to see how he felt about those little ones running freely through the school’s halls, unashamed of who and what they were. They had nothing to fear, but Erik had. It reminded him of his experiences with his step brother, who had hated Charles’ own gift. It was for this reason Charles had opened the school. He’d wanted others to have the chance to be free to learn and be who they were. He didn’t want anyone to live the way he and Erik had. He found himself reaching out to the other man, hand curling around his forearm and squeezing gently. Not pity, but some understanding, his heart going out to him for all he’d dealt with growing up. As Charles withdrew from Erik’s mind, his eyes fluttered open. “Where are you staying?” he asked. “Wo jetzt leben?”
“mit einem freund,” erik replied softly. charles got a vague impression of death-mourning-rituals big-family clustered-together food-song-reading empty house loud city overwhelming. he laid his hand over charles’s and patted his fingers, giving him a smile. ”telepathie scheint schwierig zu sein,“ he wondered. knowing everything about a person all at once. one’s own head could be a minefield, with infinite layers and complexities, it made singular people insane. how it must have been to have other minds on top of it, erik didn’t envy him. ”ton nit zorg,“ he found himself saying-wanting to say. ”ikh bin gliklekh.“ worry not, worry not. i am happy, now. maybe it wasn’t the best thing-lying to a telepath, but he felt the need to reassure. he wasn’t miserable after all. he had a good life.
@itsmagnetsbabey
TOLL V SMOL AAAAAAHG
I just realised Ph.D should stand for Preferred Hill to Die on.
Painful Hell of a Dissertation
The main problem with the X-Men is that all of their good villains keep joining them.