can anyone fucking hear me
I'm fully aware that I'm waxing poetic to the void at this point but I never imagined I'd be able to get on this account again. I had been trying every couple years or so and now I finally regained access to the email linked to this blog. Not really sure what I was trying to accomplish with logging back in besides pop in like a ghost haha. I was just going to message all the blogs still up even though I know they're not active but I ended up getting sucked into looking through the archive instead.
Very weird seeing these posts again after over a decade now. I've changed so much since then. And I'm sure the people I was interacting with have changed as much as I have.
It's funny how I ran this account while I was still in high school and about a month ago I got a message from an old acquaintance about our ten year reunion coming up in the summer(?).
I was in a really bad place at that time. There was a lot of unacknowledged mental health issues and even more abuse going on. I don't remember if I ever told any of my mutuals here, though. It was bad. This website was my only escape. Even if I did feel like I was still on the fringes of the groups I interacted with.
Not to be dramatic but sometimes I think I'm still here because I was still allowed to have unrestricted access to the internet. I met a lot of amazing people here even though we lost touch. I met my first boyfriend here. We live in the same city but we don't talk anymore.
Not really sure where I'm going with this. I guess all this to say: I enjoyed ruminating on this little piece of my own history. I'm happier now. I live on my own. I have my own cat. I have more friends. I travel. I still love music. I don't think that will ever change.
Anywaaaaaay if somehow old rp cohorts read this drivel, just know I think of you fondly <3
