I have a question for trans and genderfluid people. I'm a woman and I'm pan. But idk how to explain it I've always liked women in a "man- way". Like I always watched straight porn to look at women and put myself in the man's position (something I did even before realising that I was into women). I don't "connect" with lesbian porn but I feel some type of way about gay porn (I'm not fetishizing them). Also this is not just about porn, it's not all sexual. I also feel more "connected" to mlm relationships. I don't hate being a woman but also want to be a man sometimes. Am I trans or am I just genderfluid? All the experiences that I've read are from people who have always known. I am terrified at the thought of being trans because idk how my family would react but I'm not letting that effecting my thought process. I've always idealized drag queens. If I were to be a trans man I would be a very feminine one. So I don't know if I've felt gender envy in that way.
I read a tweet about how a women feeling more connected to gay relationships might as well be trans. I don't know anyone irl how could help me and I can't access therapy rn. So please if there's anyone out there who has experienced something similar please share your experiences if you are comfortable. I would be very grateful. Thank you



















