[angelicguy]

talking to my infant son like im a youtuber

[looking4myson]

Whats up baby. Father here bringing you another spoonful of Gerber ham and gravy baby food

[earthdad]

if you don’t like your subs toasted you don’t love yourself

[thyrell]

never heard that term before wym

[thyrell]

hold on you mean sandwiches

[retrowar]

[qsy-complains-a-lot]

[jay-jay-gone]

Are you proud of yourself? Are you happy you made this?

[qsy-complains-a-lot]

Oh you have no idea.

[bakwaaas]

[heavensghost]

thanks universe for letting me exist but next time no physical form please

[blackgwenstacy]

the american public listening to kamala and pence drag each other’s records as if one isn’t a cop and the other isn’t a white supremacist

[shirkers2018dirsanditan]

it literally makes me scream that we straight up know nothing about trump’s condition and will literally never get a true answer unless some nurse leaks to the press, he dies, or recovers and goes back to business as usual. like i hate this bro

[sexysnakegirl-deactivated202105]

i want the equivalent of a zoo otter cam

[milknjuice-deactivated20190908]

New Taylor swift song called fuck like a mountain rat

[whitepeopletwitter]

[prettykikimora-deactivated20250]

These news programs think they’re slick all the time writing the number out long form rather than like 22.2 billion to make it seem like this impossible inconceivable number at first glance but then you realize we spend 22 billion every couple weeks on things that kill people.

[pianjeong]

come on brain yip yip

[ratfuck]

[memeuplift]

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[zzzanzzz-deactivated20201124]

People in their twenties be like. My interest include drugs. Drinking. Tv series. Uber eat. causing and then resolving Interpersonal issues

[pastabot]

fucked up that some guy was making gummies and was like “what are the two most edible things in the world... bear... and.... worm”

[binarutodude-deactivated2024032]

[verifiedaccount]

i’m smart-passing