JAKE

Hi. I'm Jake. I like music, hockey, and cereal.

[j3ke]

Glen Hansard // 11.20.15 (at State Theatre (Minneapolis, Minnesota))

[outback-cakehouse]

This is what happens when I get drunk and email Hulu about the sheer volume of Sea World commercials they bombard me with.  Stephen’s final response was stock and left much to be desired.

[rollingstone]

Watch Dave Grohl play a noisy guitar solo on his broken leg at the band’s New Jersey show.

[j3ke]

Pretty soon they are just going to replace him with a Spencer's Gifts.

[j3ke]

[j3ke]

Do you think you ever went too far with these stunts? I might have done things differently if I could do them over again. There was one time when Scott Adsit [the actor who later played Pete Hornberger on 30 Rock] and I and the rest of our group were performing in front of an audience. This was when Bill Clinton was president. Scott came out and said, “Ladies and gentlemen, I have some terrible news. President Clinton has just been assassinated.” Scott’s a really good actor and he played it very real. The whole crowd completely believed it. We then wheeled out a television to watch the most up-to-date news coverage. We turned it on and the audience saw NFL bloopers—we had already inserted a VHS tape. One of us yelled, “Wait, don’t change it!” The whole cast came out and hunkered down and just started laughing at these football bloopers. The people in the audience slowly began to file out, dazed. That was the end of our show. -Adam McKay, on his improv days from Poking a Dead Frog

[j3ke]

I made this so you can print it out and give it to your mom.

[j3ke]

"Once in a generation a book so righteously bad, so staggeringly deceiving and so unbearably fake comes along that it challenges the way we view ourselves and the world we call home - how can this happen in this day and age?”

This is from an Amazon review from a book which, according to the 4th page of my Google results, my name appears in. 

[j3ke]

The top baby in the smoking study looks like me watching an episode of Mulaney’s show.

[j3ke]

It’s an honor to live so close to where Fulton first unleashed the knuckle puck his very powerful shot.

[dontputyourqrcodethere]

Don’t put your QR code on a bag of green onions.

[j3ke]

Regrets, I've had a few.

[j3ke]

Lotta stuff happened this year. I got married, traveled, got a new job, hung out with my dog and, perhaps most noticeably, got a timelapse camera.

Previous years:

2013.

2012.

[j3ke]

I think this whole ALS ice bucket challenge is more self-congratulating than anything, but I was challenged, so I HAD to do it. I didn't think ice was that difficult so I decided to up the ante and do it with boiling water instead!

[j3ke]

Got married, internet!

[j3ke]

Last night at my wedding, I had the Bar Mitzvah I never had.

[j3ke]

Wearing this shirt is the bravest thing I've done because she hasn't signed the marriage license yet.

[j3ke]

When I was in middle school, I had a shirt like this. My teachers thought I was just embracing my Jewish culture, until word spread about what it said upside down. Then I wasn't allowed to wear it anymore.