Jack White's Guacamole @jack-whites-guac - Tumblr Blog

🅱️lessed to 🅱️e the 🅱️ in my new 🅱️and

http://facebook.com/scubaband if you’d like to spare a like

#only took me a million tries to get the gif to work

It’s a shame the National Geographic folks couldn’t have shot this thing when it was painted–but here’s the finished standing Quetzalcoatlus. He’s taller than a modern giraffe!

picsthatmakeyougohmm

hmmm

teathattast

cronch

princesstigerbelle

They screm

They screm for the cronch

turnaroundandie-deactivated2023

My face when the Dairy Queen worker flips my blizzard upside down

osidius-el-enfatico

jurassic-parks-n-rex

No one has ever been in an empty room

theoppositeofadults

vacron

EM juste après :

thecoppercow

Oh but it gets better, look! :

Language-based cheeky trolling is my fave kind of trolling…

mitochondriaandbunnies

Dan and I bought a thing called “long ziti” from the local Weird Bargain Store, largely as a joke, but…. I have never had a more unsettling pasta experience in my life. They wouldn’t bend enough to cook from top to bottom simultaneously, and while they were cooking boiling water kept spouting out from the tops of them out of the pot, like a boiling pipe organ. Then they were so long and floppy and hoselike that we couldn’t pick them up with anything other than tongs, and then they were so long and unwieldy that it was basically impossible to sauce them without them all slithering out of the bowl like wet snakes. They then proceeded to cool down almost completely within the the seconds it took to walk to the living room. Eating them was like eating a bowl full half melted drinking straws.

elemeno-pee

Bringing back Long Ziti for another round because it’s just too funny

cricketsqueak

real life creepypasta

seinfeldworld

ricefan

hourlymemes

theonion

GRAND ISLE, LA—Unsure when he would feel such a compulsion again, local man Robert Malbrook told reporters Wednesday that he had no choice but to ride an unexpected urge to clean as far as it will take him. “I could be doing other things, but I have to take advantage of this while I still can,” said Malbrook, wiping down the counters of his kitchen and sweeping up the crumbs around the trash can in an impulsive flurry of activity that he was well aware could vanish as quickly as it came. “I want to mop the floors, scrub the stove top, even clean out the refrigerator. I simply can’t let this feeling pass. I don’t know how far this wave is going to take me, but I’m on board all the way to the very end.” At press time, Malbrook had stopped abruptly while washing his bathtub and moments later was watching TV.