Midnight Thoughts: Running out of time
“running out of time” is a myth.
It’s your first time and only time living… probably. Unless Reincarnations are a thing, who knows.
You can’t do anything to live it “wrong”
it’s okay if it’s taking forever for you to find interest in something you wanna do.
It’s okay if there is no hobby in this world that catches your interest. Maybe the world just hasn’t found the right thing that suits your heart, specifically.
It’s okay if it’s taking you forever to find your first partner. It’s okay if it’s taking you forever to find the person you want to marry.
You know it’s funny. An 8 year old cant wait to turn 10. A 13 year old just wants to be one of those 16 year old cool kids. A 16 year old can’t wait to be a legal adult. An 18 year old thinks they are starting to turn ancient. A 20 year old thinks their life is coming to an end.
I haven’t reached any further than 20 yet… so I can’t really have a say on what these other ages feel. though I do already feel 25 because of my experiences which I feel forced me to grow up. At least I am younger than the age I perceive myself to be. This is probably the first time in my life I feel younger (yet older?) at the same. But emphasis on the younger… !
Okay, I will admit- I got carried away. I didn’t mean to share that piece of lore about myself. It’s not even lore, it’s a dumb thought process but okay whatever phew girl.
Point of the post being… yeah time, or age, is a weird thing. Everyone is exactly where they should be in life. There is no rush… and rush is only but a mental thing.
I realized today, I run more miles mentally than I ever did physically. There is a rush, a grasping, just always something- wanting more or just whatever. Being desperate or wanting relief or something dude idek. Maybe this is why I’ve always been more drawn towards substances, they tend to shut down noises.
I wish this sort of rush manifested in urgency towards actual running though, I am trying to get my run time down ;) … Here. I set an intention, that every one of you reading this post go for a run sometime this week. Even if it’s a short sprint or the slowest granny jog. I set another intention that, my own run time decreases and my mileage/pacing increases.
The only time we should be running out of… is actual run time, in real time. Let’s try not to run out of time in that, though.
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