Jae's Queso @jaesqueso - Tumblr Blog

Lie with you (m)

pairing: friend!mark x fem!reader

summary: mark helps you out and you turn it into a thing, no feelings involved, but can you resist?

word count: 10,392

warnings: mtf oral, fingering, protected sex, drinking, friends2lovers

a/n: the unexpected come back 😅 and right after the recent news this was the one I was working on so well, here it is! I don't know how it got so big but well, hope y'all like it! ❤︎ not proof read

☽ ・・・・・ ☾

This night was supposed to be a good night. Your friends finally convinced you to go out and have some fun after spending the last two months secluded in your house, crying over a jackass who did nothing but treat you bad and even had the guts to cheat. Several times.

It took some time since you entered the club, but you were finally letting loose, dancing and having a laugh with your friends. Until you saw him, obviously with a girl under his arm, a new one, not the one he cheated you with. Disgusting.

Instantly the smile leaves your face and you make your way to the bar, asking for a couple of shots that you gulp right in. You hadn’t seen him since the breakup and were expecting to be sad, besides anything you really did love this guy, but now you just feel angry. Angry that he still has that stupid smirk on his face, like the whole year you spent together meant absolutely nothing.

As you keep the drinks coming, from the corner of your eyes you watch your friend Mark sneaking into the bathroom with a beautiful girl you saw him dance with before. At least someone is getting lucky, good for him.

You’ve been friends with Mark for a long time and, although you don’t fully support his “just hook ups” lifestyle, he is a good guy who never tries to hurt anyone by playing around with their feelings, like some other people you know. Ugh, there you go thinking about your idiot ex once again. One more shot please.

“Someone is having fun by herself.”

Turning to the voice, your head spins and you realize maybe you had too many shots.

“Hey, hey, I got you.” Chuckling, Mark holds your arm, holding you in place as you lose balance. “I’m assuming this has something to do with a certain bastard?”

With a sigh you turn back to the last full shot on the counter. Why did you think no one would notice?

“How about I have this one?” Mark easily snatches the glass off your hand, gulping it down.

“Are you that good?” You lean back into the counter, watching the girl he got into the bathroom with him pass by with a satisfied smile on her face.

“At what?”

“Giving head.” You had heard rumours before and were always curious about it.

“Well,” he scratches the back of his head, half shy half proud, “I guess I never had any complaints.”

“Why did I waste a year with that dumbass when I could’ve gone around and get some good head?” Your whines were drunk sad.

“Ok, maybe it’s time to go.” Pulling your arm around his neck, Mark grabs your waist and takes you outside where he struggles to call an Uber as he tries not to let you fall.

Once inside the vehicle, he lets out a breath of relief as you rest your head on his shoulder. Your eyelids get heavier and you let them close, the late night city lights reflecting on your faded out make up.

“Do you enjoy doing it?” You mumble through the silence.

“Doing what?” Mark slightly turns his head to you.

“Giving head.”

“Oh, hm… Yeah.” He tones his voice down, aware of the driver. “I like making someone feel good.”

“Do they always feel good when you do it?” You continue the questions without even thinking or opening your eyes.

“Well,” he chuckles, “I never got any complaints.”

“I wish someone would make me feel good.”

“How long has it been?” Mentally he thinks about how long it’s been since you and your ex broke up. “Few months?”

“Sex, yes. Head, since my previous life.”

“Wait, what?” Fully turning to you, his eyes widen and his jaw drops. “Do you mean that asshole never gave you-”

“We’re here.” The driver interrupts Mark’s shock as the car stops in front of your apartment building.

The both of you get out of the car and he helps you up your apartment. After struggling with the keys, he follows you to the bedroom, picking up the things you drop in the way including your clothes that you clumsily remove until you’re in your underwear. After placing them over your desk, he opens the bed covers for you to lay down and then tucks you in.

“Where are you going?” You mumble as he heads back to the door.

“Home.”

“You’re not gonna help me out?” Whining you pull yourself up to your elbows. “I thought we were friends.”

“I already got you home safe.” He chuckles. “What else to you need help with?”

“To make me feel good.” You push the covers off of you and caress your body. “Show me how good you are.”

Mark is shocked and conflicted. He shouldn’t do it, you’ve been friends for so long, never crossing the line, maybe this isn’t a good idea. But, on the other hand, he feels sorry you never got to experience that type of pleasure and he does want to help you out. But he can’t, no, friendship is more important-

“Please…” His thoughts are interrupted by your desperate plea and your underwear being thrown at his chest.

“Fuck it.”

Walking back to the bed, he sits down next to your legs that you slowly open to reveal your needy pussy. Gulping at the sight, Mark adjusts himself, face to face with your core that is begging for him. Looking up he sees the way you’re softly bitting your lip in anticipation and he knows not to keep you waiting any longer.

Leaning forward, he takes a long lick between your folds and hears you gasp, which makes him smile. Focusing on your clit, he plays all the techniques in the book, licking and sucking in all the ways that have gotten him a symphony of moans from other girls, and it seems to be doing the same thing to you.

Your hands are tugging on the sheets, back arching off the bed, eyes rolling to the back of your head, mouth agape letting out all the moans you don’t have the strength to keep inside. You never, ever, felt something like this before. You were never one to cum easily on the hands of someone else, but when two fingers enter your dripping hole you feel like you won’t be able to hold it much longer.

The combination of mouth and fingers, that work in sync, achieve their purpose in no time, making your body tremble as your orgasm reaches every inch of it. Mark, keeps going, softly, as you ride off your high, until he sees your limbs give in.

“So, how was that-” Stepping back he realizes your eyes are closed and you’re even snoring a little bit.

Smiling he gets up and tucks you back in, not bothering to get any clothes back on you. Quietly, he calls another Uber and leaves, not believing he actually did it, but almost sure you might not even remember it the next day.

The sunlight on your face makes you whine and turn the other way as you wake up. The previous night are just flashes on your mind, but as you look around you are at least glad you made it back home. But you don’t remember how. So you decide to take a peak under the covers and gasp when you realize you don’t have your panties on.

“What the hell happened-” You try to get up but suddenly the hangover strikes you straight in the head, making you groan.

As if you were not confused already, you can hear your phone vibrate but you have no idea where it is. Following the sound, you find a pile of yesterdays clothes, your purse and, yes, your phone, that you pick up without even checking the caller.

“You’re alive!” You hear your best friend’s voice, that’s usually a good sound but right now it’s just making your headache worst.

“Barely…” You mumble, getting back inside the covers as it feels weird to stand there only wearing a bra.

“What happened last night?” Little does she know you’re asking yourself the same thing. “You know what, I’m right around the corner, be there in five.”

She doesn’t even let you say another word before she hangs up. With a deep breath, you finally locate your panties on the floor and, since you’re not gonna have time to shower before she arrives, you put them on and then wrap yourself in a robe.

Scrolling on your phone, you try to find any evidence of what might’ve happened, but you can only see unanswered texts and missed calls from your best friend. Ok, concentrate. The last thing you remember is being at the bar, chugging shot after shot because you saw your ex in the club. And then-

The doorbell rings and interrupts your thought process. Shaking your head you rush to open the door, being greeted by a large coffee that you desperately need. You and your best friend sit in the living room where the interrogation starts.

“What happened last night? We were dancing and having fun, then you suddenly disappear, so I thought you went to the bathroom or something, but you never came back. Then I looked around the club and saw the reason you stepped away,” she rolls her eyes, “but I still couldn’t find you so I thought you might’ve gone home. I was wondering why you weren’t answering my texts and then, like an hour later, I saw Mark carrying your drunk ass outside, but when I got out…”

Her voice fades into the background when you hear his name. Mark. You’re starting to remember a few things. Yes, he met you at the bar, helped you home and then he left.

Oh, no.

He didn’t leave right away. You asked him to give you head and he… He did it. Your eyes widen as you remember it all. How could you ask him such a thing? And why would he do it? That’s so embarrassing! How are you ever going to face him again-

“So what happened?” You’re finally brought back as she asks that question again.

“I…” You can’t possibly tell her what happened, you need to talk to Mark first and make sure you’re cool. “I don’t remember.”

“How did you get so wasted in such a short time?” She shakes her head. “That bastard does not deserve that you to suffer over him, you need to let it go, babe.”

“I’m fine.” You’re not, but not about your ex anymore.

“Really?” She raises her brow.

“Yeah.”

Throughout the whole day, you keep thinking about what happened. Why did he do it? Why did you ask him to? What did it mean? Is it going to change anything? Mark is a dear friend you don’t want to lose, but now you definitely understand why girls always leave his room with a smile on their faces, you never felt like that before and, honestly, you want to feel like that again. But you don’t know where he’s at with all of this, so you don’t want to text him or call him up to talk about it, so you make sure you run into him the next day.

“Mark!” You act surprised even though you knew exactly he’d be at the park at this time.

“Oh, hey!” He abruptly stops his running, smiling like nothing happened.

“I know you’re a bit busy but, do you mind if we talk for a bit?”

“Hm, sure.” He then turns back to his friends. “You guys go ahead, I’ll catch up.”

As his friends resume their running, you notice the sweat running down the side of Mark’s neck, slithering into his shirt, and you start to feel hot. You never looked at him as more than a friend but he sure is making you feel some type of way.

“What’s up?” His voice reminds you that you’re here in a mission.

“Nothing much, I just… Hm…” You wanted to talk to him so much that you kinda forgot to plan how you’re going to bring it up. “I wanted to thank you for the other night.”

“Oh, that’s alright.” His smile drops a bit, but not totally. “I mean, I wasn’t gonna leave you in the club like that.”

“Right.” You nod. “And the other thing too.”

“What, uh… What other thing?” His awkward laugh suggests he might be conflicted about it too.

“You don’t have to pretend, I asked for it and you did it.”

“Oh, you remember that?” He scratches the back of his head.

“I’m sorry.” You sigh. “I don’t know where that came from, it was just a lot of emotions that night.”

“No, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done it knowing you were drunk, I’m not the type of guy to just take advantage of someone like that.”

“Mark,” you step forward, “you didn’t take advantage of me, I asked for it.”

“You weren’t thinking straight.” He shakes his head and looks away. “I should’ve known you’d regret it.”

“What if I don’t regret it?” His head snaps your way.

“You don’t?”

“Maybe.” You feel your face get really hot admitting it. “I have to admit, you do have game.”

You both burst out laughing, a wave of weight being washed of your shoulders.

“But seriously, I wanted to ask you if we’re ok?” You ask as the laughter slows down. “I really don’t want to ruin our friendship.”

“Don’t worry, we’re ok.” He lifts up his pinkie and you grab it with yours.

“Cool.” You nod as you let go.

“I gotta get back to the guys, see you around.” You wave at each other as he turns around. “Oh, and if you ever need to feel good again just let me know!”

“What!?”

Days go by and you don’t think back to that conversation, you’re just glad things are cool and you haven’t lost a good friend over a drunk adventure. In all honesty you feel the best you’ve ever felt in months, happy and free, ready to conquer the world. So much that you even agree to go to a party with your best friend a week later, leaving her thrilled and finally believing you’re really moving on from your previous relationship.

Laughter, dancing and drinking brighten the room as you two got ready. Even if it’s just a house party you still enjoy the ritual because it’s been so long since you had the chance to. Not to mention you got there super late since you two were having so much fun.

As you get there, you’re greeted by the hosts, aka the guys that live there: Johnny, Jaehyun and, oh yes, Mark. When you look at him the words suddenly come back to your mind.

Oh, and if you ever need to feel good again just let me know!

Brushing it off, you grab your best friend into the living room where people are dancing to the pop songs coming from the stereo. Letting go off all thoughts, you move your body to the rhythm and loosen up. But eventually all the pre-drinking gets to your bladder and you leave the improvised dance floor to find a bathroom.

Since you’ve been here before, you know exactly which bathroom would have the smaller line and you pat yourself in the back for being right as no one seems to be around.

Once you’re done you reach the handle to get back out but suddenly the door opens making you shriek.

“Shit, sorry!” Mark’s widened eyes meet yours as he tries to close the door again.

“It’s ok, I was already getting out.” You smile as you stop him.

“Still, I should’ve knocked, but I didn’t think anyone would come to this one.”

“Guess I thought the same thing.” You both burst into laughter as you get out of the way for him to get in.

Before you get back to the party, you take a few deep breaths calming your racing heart. And no, it’s not because you got a bit of a jump scare just now, but because every time you see him those words resonate in your mind.

Oh, and if you ever need to feel good again just let me know!

You didn’t realise you’ve been standing in the hall for a while until the bathroom door opens up again.

“You’re still here?” Well, obviously.

“Hm, yeah. I…” You try to come up with a better excuse than to admit you were thinking about him and something he probably doesn’t even remember saying. “I was just taking a breather before going back.”

“Ok…” He finds your answer quite odd but just brushes it off and walks way.

“Wait, Mark!” He turns back around. “Did you mean it?”

“Mean what?” He looks puzzled with your question.

“What you said at the park the other day.” As he seems to try to recall it, you instantly regret asking. “You know what? Never mind.”

“Oh, do you mean about making you feel good again?” He suddenly says as you walk by him, making you stop on your tracks. “Why? Do you need it?”

“I…” You’re quite shocked he’s asking so directly and you think of leaving, but then again you’re already talking about it. “Maybe.”

“You have to give me a straight answer this time.” His face changes as he turns you to him, his deep gaze making your legs feel weak.

“Yes.” You speak before you even think.

“Come with me.”

You follow him to the door next to the bathroom that for a second you forgot that it was actually his room. It all feels surreal until he closes the door and presses you against the wall.

“Are you sure you want this?” His dark eyes stare into your soul.

“Yes…” A mere whisper falls out your lips.

Never breaking eye contact, Mark slowly kneels down at your feet. His hands brush softly up the sides of your bare thighs, making their way inside your skirt and then drag your underwear to the floor. Gently, he lifts one of your legs over his shoulder and leans forward.

Your lips part with a shaky gasp as you feel the warmth of his tongue between your folds. Taking his time, he tastes every inch of your wet pussy, making your heart beat faster as your whole body gets warmer. From licking circles on your clit, to thrusting his tongue inside you, he uses all the tricks in the book, making you remember why you challenged him to do this the first time.

It doesn’t take too long for you to feel the orgasm building up inside you and he knows it, doing just the right thing to pull it out of you. But as much as you want to feel it, less drunk this time, something within you is craving for more.

“Wait…” You gently push his face away from your crotch.

“Do you want me to stop?” Mark asks, lips glowing with your juices.

“No, no!” You quickly say. “I just…”

“Yes?” Getting up, he comes face to face with you again.

“Want more.” You let out, making his eyes widen.

“What?”

“Do you have a condom?”

You’ve never seen him run to look for something this fast. As he goes through his bedside drawers, your crawl onto his bed, his scent on the sheets taking over you. At the sound of a cheer, you look to the side and see him standing next to the bed, a square package in one hand, looking at you as if asking if you’re really sure.

Because actions speak louder than words, you move closer to him and unbutton his jeans. It’s not that you couldn’t see the outline of dick already, but you weren’t expecting it to just bounce right in front of your face once your freed it, hard as a rock.

As you’re too busy gagging over the sight, Mark rips the package open and rolls the rubber down his length. Once you get a hold of yourself, you lay back down and he moves to hover you. Your legs spread to make room for him and you pull your skirt all the way up to give him full access to your throbbing core.

Rubbing the tip of his cock between your folds, he bites his lip as if holding a moan. Then he aligns it with your entrance and slowly starts pushing himself in. You don’t know if it’s relief because it’s been a long time since you’ve had someone inside you or if he just feels really good, but you let out the most satisfied moan of your life, making him chuckle.

Once fully in, he starts thrusting slowly, giving you time to adjust, but you can’t handle it. Just a few moments ago you were almost cumming all over his face so this just feels like a tease.

“Mark please… Don’t be gentle…”

You know you probably look pathetic begging like this but he seems to get the message. His hips start moving faster against you, re-building that orgasm that was left on hold. Grasping the sheets, you arch your back away from the mattress, skin burning in desire.

When you feel like you can’t hold it anymore, you completely give into the pleasure, a loud moan escaping your lips as your body trembles. Mark tries to slow down, riding off your high, but the way your walls tighten around his girth are making it impossible to hold it in, so not long after, the condom gets filled with his hot cum as he lets out a low groan. With his head hanging low, his hands on the bed prevent him from collapsing over you as you both pant, trying to calm down.

But the lust slowly starts to fade and the two of you come to your senses and realize what you just did. Carefully, he gets off of you and lays by your side, both staring at the celling in silence. Suddenly you become aware of the music coming from the living room and remember there’s a whole ass party going on whilst you two were here getting it on.

“Maybe we should go back out there.” You finally say.

“Yeah, I guess.” He agrees, but no one actually moves.

“Was this too weird?”

“I don’t know.”

“At least it was good.”

“Definitely.”

“Would it be even more weird if I kinda wanted this to happen again?”

“Do you mean now?” He suddenly turns to you. “I mean, you’ll have to give me a few minutes to-”

“Not now.” You giggle. “I mean, some other time.”

“I guess that wouldn’t be so bad.” He shrugs.

“What if we made this a thing?” You finally turn to him too.

“What do you mean?” His eyebrow raises.

“Well, we could casually meet up once in a while and… You know.” You tilt your head and he smiles understanding the meaning. “No one would have to know, it could be our thing.”

“So like, friends with benefits? Fuck buddies?”

“Something like that.” You nod. “I mean, I’m not thinking about dating any time soon but a girl has needs, you know? At least I know we work in the bedroom. And, from what I see, you’re not too keen on getting a girlfriend either, so I would just be one more girl you have some fun with.”

“So, we wouldn’t be exclusive then? We could be with other people if we wanted to?”

“Of course! All pleasure, no troubles.” You reassure him. “What do you say?”

“That actually sounds pretty good.” He chuckles. “Deal!”

With a smile, you two fix your clothes and get back to the party as if nothing ever happened. No one even asks where either of you were this whole time because there’s been a lot of alcohol going around during that time, and you quickly join the fun.

A week passes and you and Mark haven’t really talked much, but that’s just how it has always been, so nothing strange about it. Tonight you have a birthday dinner but as you were about to get in the shower you suddenly remember your car is almost out of gas and it would be a pain in the ass to spend money on that at this time of the month. But then you remember Mark had sent you a funny meme earlier that you didn’t reply to and, since he’s going too, you decide to take your shot.

You: haha so funny

You: hey, are you taking your car later?

Mark: yeah, why?

Mark: need a ride?

You: if it’s not too much trouble… *praying hands emoji*

Mark: no problem *thumbs up emoji*

You: you are an angel *blowing kiss emoji*

With a cheer, you put on some loud music and step into the shower.

When you’re out, you notice you have a missed call and some unread messages.

Mark: I’m here

*missed call*

Mark: just hanging in the car

Mark: come down when you’re ready

You’re dumbfounded, you still have an hour before the time agreed for the dinner and, to be honest, no one even shows up at that time.

You: are you crazy? It’s so early!

You: I just stepped out of the shower *face palm emoji*

Mark: oh, right

Mark: it’s ok

Mark: I’ll wait here *thumbs up emoji*

You: don’t be an idiot *rolling eyes emoji*

You: at least come up and watch tv or something

Mark: *thumbs up emoji*

A few minutes later you open the door and let him in but he just stands there gulping as he looks up and down your body, still wet and only covered by a white towel.

“Don’t be a perv,” you roll your eyes, “come in.”

Shaking his head, he finally enters your apartment, closing the door behind him.

“Make yourself at home. I’m going to get ready.”

“Wait.” Mark softly grabs your pulse, making you turn back around. ”You said it was still early right?”

“Well, yeah, but I still have to get dressed, do my make up, my hair-”

“How long do you need?” He interrupts.

“I don’t know…” You shrug. ”Why?”

“I’ve been thinking about our conversation the other night,” he steps closer, not able to take his eyes away from a single water drop that’s running down your neck into your chest, “and maybe we could use this time to… You know.”

A smirk grows on your lips knowing exactly what he means. Looking into his eyes, you take the corner of the towel and untuck it, making it drop to the ground and leaving you fully naked. You nod to the bedroom and he follows you to it, starting to remove his clothes on the way.

Crawling into the bed, you lay back and invite him over which he does immediately, already undressed to his underwear. His mouth goes straight to your neck, kissing just the right place to make your insides tingle and even gently leaving some love bites.

“Don’t mark me,” you say between giggles, “we have a party to go to.”

“Sorry.” Mark chuckles moving his mouth down your body.

Your legs spread apart to make room for him as his lips approach your core. You can’t help moaning once his tongue slides between your folds to then focus on your clit. It really must be magic the way he eats you out so perfectly, like he’s been doing it for years, because it’s not possible how quickly the orgasm builds inside you. You almost lose it when he adds two fingers, as far as they can reach, moving around to stretch you out, leaving you craving for what’s coming next.

You could lay there for hours, getting eaten out until your pussy is sore, but you suddenly remember you don’t have much time to spare, So, against your will, you gently tug on his hair, moving his face away from between your legs.

“Fuck me, Mark.” You try not to sound desperate but your voice seems to betray you.

Quickly he reaches his jeans to grab a condom and puts it on as he gets back on top of you, his dick already hard and ready. He enters you slowly, cursing under his breath as he feels your walls squeezing his length, and when he’s fully inside he lets out a relieved sigh.

It doesn’t take him long to pick up his pace, his hips pounding against your core as your legs wrap around his torso, making sure he reaches as deep as he can at each thrust. Suddenly you become very aware of how close his face is from yours, sweat starting to appear on his forehead, lips still shinning from your juices. Why does his mouth looks so delicious? Why do you want to kiss him so bad right now? No, that would make it weird, right? You have a good arrangement, you don’t want to fuck it up.

Either he notices something on your expressing or he just felt like trying a new angle, flipping you around so that you’re on all fours and he enters you from behind. The new position makes him reach a new target within you and you have to bury your face in your pillow to prevent all your neighbours hearing how good you feel at this very moment.

Grasping your hips, Mark seems to move in and out of you faster than before, clearly chasing his high, but that only does you good as you finally let the orgasm take over you. Holding you steady in place, it doesn’t take him much longer to cum too and leaving you both glad you made this deal.

Gently he takes his dick out of you and collapses on the bed by your side. As you catch your breath you look at each other and chuckle. But then you look past him at the clock on your bedside table and realize you don’t have much time anymore.

Luckily you already had an outfit picked up so you quickly get dressed and do some light makeup, leaving your hair to air dry on the way there. By the time you’re done, you and Mark go down to his car and drive to the place.

“Should we come up with a cover story?” He asks as he tries to find a place to park.

“What for?” You ask as you look around for an empty spot.

“Well, us- I mean, arriving together.” He stumbles on his words as he drives into a parking spot.

“No need to, we’ll just tell the truth.”

“What?” He suddenly hits the brakes, turning your way. “I thought you wanted to keep this between us.”

“I do, but we don’t have to tell them the whole truth.” You shrug. “I ran out of gas and asked you for a ride.”

“Oh, right.” He nods.

“Don’t overthink it, just act natural.” You wink before getting out of the car.

The conversation about you two arriving together lasts literally 20 seconds as the birthday girl quickly becomes the center of attention once more. Throughout the night you barely have any contact with Mark but there are a few looks here and there that only you understand.

It almost became a weekly thing. Usually at the weekend there would be a party and you’d end up fucking somewhere or going back to your apartment, or some excuse would arrive for you to meet and get it on.

As friends you become closer than before, talking more either by text or when you met, and when it came to sex, you seemed to get more and more compatible, trying new positions and new ways of making the most out of those pleasurable moments.

A few months later there you were at the club, with your friends, including Mark, on the dance floor having fun. When Mark goes to the bar to get a new drink and you decide to wait a few minutes to go meet him and see if he’s up to anything tonight. But as you make your way through the crowd you notice a girl next to him, giggling and seductively touching his arm. This is not an unusual situation though and he’s free to be with whoever he wants, but for some reason today you start to feel your blood boil. Rolling your eyes you go back to the dance floor and try to calm yourself down, eyes closed and just feeling the beat.

Around 10 minutes later, Mark rejoins the group like nothing happened and that makes you even more mad. You don’t even know why you’re feeling this way so you do your best to control yourself before somebody notices or you do anything you might regret.

The night goes on, slowly people start leaving and you start thinking you might follow, but first you decide to hit the bathroom as you probably won’t make it home after all those drinks. Once you’re done you get back to the club to leave but someone calls you outside the bathroom.

“Mark?” You squint trying to make sure it’s him.

“Are you staying much longer?” Chuckling he gets closer so you can hear him over the music that’s still blasting through the speakers.

“No, I think I’m gonna go now.” You reply still not sure if he’ll be able to hear you.

“Perfect.” He smirks. “Cause I really wanted to go back to yours…”

“Are you sure? I thought you were all set up for the night.” You suddenly spurt out remembering that girl on the bar with him.

“What do you mean?” He asks confused.

“Never mind.” You turn to go grab your stuff and leave, Mark following behind.

On the way to your apartment, he sits next to you on the Uber jabbering about something that someone said earlier but honestly you’re not listening to a word coming out of his mouth. All you can think about is why you’re getting so annoyed with the possibility of him being with someone else when you were the one who agreed that was ok to do.

Inside the elevator he finally goes quiet and seems to stare at you, wondering why you seem so weird. You just hope he doesn’t ask about it.

“What was that about me being ‘set up for the night’?” You sigh knowing he won’t leave it alone until you give him an answer.

“Nothing, I just…” You drop your bag and take off your shoes. “I thought you had your bathroom trip earlier and didn’t want to come over anymore.”

“What? Why?” He raises his eyebrow.

“I saw you with someone at the bar-” You stop yourself not wanting to talk about it anymore. “Just, never mind.”

“Oh, that was just-” Suddenly he widens his eyes. “Wait! Are you jealous?”

“What, me!?” You scoff. “Of course not!”

“Right…” He drags the word, not really believing you. “Anyway, would it be a problem if I had fucked her?”

“No.” You clear your throat. “I just don’t want anyone’s sloppy seconds.”

“I see.” He gets closer to you, making you back up until your back is against the wall. “But don’t worry, you’re always my first choice.”

“I don’t know if I should believe you.” You try to sound steady even though your knees are getting weaker.

“I’ll show you.”

His face gets closer and you instinctively close your eyes, breath caught on your throat as you feel his smooth lips against yours. Surrendering into the kiss, you let him embrace your body with hunger and softness, better than you ever imagined it would be.

With a slight touch on the back of your legs, you quickly wrap them around his torso, arms around his neck, as you let him carry you over to the couch. Clothes come off but your lips barely part as your naked bodies come together as one.

It has always been good, doing it with Mark, but tonight it feels different. Tonight almost makes you feel like you could do this every night. Just you and him. All the time.

But that’s not what you agreed to. You’re just two friends having fun. You can’t let the lines get blurred. You don’t even love him. At least not like that.

From that night on though, your secret rendezvous became more intimate, with kisses and gentle touches. It went from feeling good physically to feeling wanted, cared for, appreciated.

Almost a year after that first night, you and your friends decide to rent a house by the beach for the weekend, to welcome the beginning of warmer nights. Needless to say, Mark too will be there, so you make all efforts to make it happen.

Friday afternoon, you’re not able to get a ride with him, but you can’t wait to look around the rooms and see what arrangements you can do to be with Mark. That is until you get there and realize there are just two big rooms: one for the girls, one for the boys. Oh well, you’ll find another way.

And you do, because late that night, after everybody went to bed from a chill night in, there you are, right in the living room, his body on top of yours, your hands tugging on his hair, mouths moving in sync while the TV plays a random show on the background.

“Mark…” You whisper, stopping his hand from moving further inside your shirt. “Not here, someone might come in…”

“And?” He simply asks, moving his lips down to your neck.

“We wouldn’t want them to catch us like this would we?” Eyes closed, a smile forms on your lips as the strap of your top is slowly dragged down your shoulder.

“Maybe they should.” He mumbles agains your skin before gently taking a bite.

“Mark.” This time your voice is stern and you slightly push him off of you.

“What?” He sighs. “I’m just saying that if they knew about us, we wouldn’t have to sneak around all the time.”

It’s not the first time he brings it up. Just telling your friends you’re hooking up and then you could do it freely. But that would just make things too real and you’re already doubting everything as it is.

Obviously you don’t tell him all of that. Besides, all your friends would tease you, you’d feel pressured to date and eventually you’d break up and stop being friends. Yes, you might be overreacting but, honestly, sneaking around is part of the fun.

“I told to you stop saying that.” Now you completely push him to side and get up, adjusting your clothes.

“Oh c’mon, I was just saying…” He groans, laying back on the couch.

“And I’m just going.” You start to leave but he grabs your wrist.

“I’m sorry, I’ll stop.” He pouts, but you just push his hand.

“Goodnight, Mark.”

He watches your figure disappear into the hallway letting out a frustrated sigh, followed by an even more frustrated one when he notices the tent on his pants, throbbing, left untouched.

The next morning you wake up and most of the girls are already out of the room, enjoy the pool by the sun outside, so you hurry up and join them. The day is mostly chill, preparing for the big party at the club that evening, which is one of the reasons you decided to pick this weekend for this friends getaway.

Just before lunch, you head up inside to charge your phone, but, before you reach the girls bedroom, you get pulled into a bathroom from the empty corridor.

“Shit, Mark, you scared me!” You giggle, hitting his arm.

“Sorry.” Scratching the back of his head, he lets out a low chuckle that send butterflies down your core. “Hey.”

“Hey.” You can’t help bite your lip, suddenly feeling the closeness between your bodies whilst his fingertips gently rub down your arm.

“I just wanted to apologize for yesterday again.” With his other hand, Mark tucks a strand of hair behind your ear.

“It’s ok…” Your voice dies down as he backs you up against the sink.

“Nah,” his lips brush against your ear, “let me make it up to you.”

“You don’t have to…” You say but you hope he doesn’t stop kissing down your neck to your cleavage.

“Oh, but I want to.” With a wink he kneels down in front of you, playing with the side strings of your bikini bottoms.

With a quick tug, the small piece of fabric unravels and falls into the floor, leaving you exposed right in front of Mark’s face. Licking his lips, he taps your thighs, gesturing for you to sit at the edge of the countertop. Once settled, he spreads your legs apart to start his feast.

Your head leans back as you let out a long pleased sigh. The corners of your lips curl up, teeth leaving marks on the red skin while you try not to make a sound. But it gets really hard not to do so when you look down and see the look on his face: eyes closed, brows lightly arched, just having the time of his life.

It doesn’t take long for you to feel that familiar tingle inside you, and you’re about to stop him however you have no choice but to let yourself go as his grip on your thighs get tighter, his tongue moving impossibly fast.

Covering your mouth with one hand, you steady yourself with the other, feeling waves of pleasure run down your body, chest heaving up and down. Mark tastes every single drop coming out of you, making sure you’re all clean before pulling away.

Still recovering from your high, you barely even notice him tying your bikini bottoms back on before standing up in front of you.

“Am I forgiven?” His cocky grin glistens in front of you.

“Most definitely.” You almost moan out, making you both chuckle.

“Good.” Planting a kiss in the corner of your lips, he turns around to the door.

“Wait, where are you going?” You climb off the sink.

“Back outside before someone starts snooping around.” Shrugging his shoulders, he grabs the door handle.

“Already?” You move closer. “What about this?” His breath gets caught in his throat as you cup the bulge pushing onto his shorts. But suddenly, you both hear his name being called outside.

“Guess it will have to wait until next time.” With a wink he now leaves a kiss straight into your lips before heading out the door, leaving you giggling like a teenager inside, before you go back to what you came inside to do.

During the afternoon, everybody gathers and decides to have dinner and drinks at home before hitting the club, so very smoothly you and Mark manage to be in charge of going to the grocery store to buy food and booze.

Heading to the car, you’re both happy you get to spend some time together away from everybody’s eyes. But as you’re about to grab the handle on the passenger door you hear someone calling out and both of you look back.

“I’ll come with you!” Gabriela, a girl you don’t know that well but came along on the trip, is running your way. “Thought you needed an extra hand.”

“Oh, hum… Sure…” Mark hesitantly says and shrugs his shoulders as you give him a glare.

“You don’t mind me taking the front seat, do you?” Smiling, she automatically gets in front of you and gets in the car.

“I guess I don’t.” You say sarcastically, rolling your eyes and getting on the back, making Mark chuckle as he takes the wheel.

The 15 minute drive seems like an hour to you. You’re already annoyed this girl ruined your alone time with Mark and the way she’s singing happily and making small talk with him is just making you even more upset. At least he doesn’t seem that interested in her conversation, you think.

Trying to ignore the wrath growing inside you, the three of you walk along the corridors grabbing all the things on the list you all made before you left. But it gets really hard when this girl keeps touching Mark’s arm and laughing hysterically at everything he says as you’re left pushing the cart.

“Ok, I think that’s everything.” You announce, grateful this little trip is about to end.

As they agree, you all head to the register. Mark sneaks next to you, rubbing his hand on your lower back and giving you a pitiful smile. Looking back at him it almost seems like the whole world disappears and you almost forget why you’re annoyed. That is until he steps away noticing Gabriela starting to turn back at you.

After getting everything on the trunk, Mark volunteers to go return the cart and you just hope he comes back quickly cause you can’t stand being with this girl another minute.

“You’re close with Mark, aren't you?” She suddenly gets closer.

“Hum, we’re friends, yeah.” You step back, wondering what she’s wanting out of this question.

“Do you know if he has a girlfriend?” She bites her lip and you have to control yourself not to roll your eyes.

“No, he doesn’t.” The way her face brightens up makes your blood boil and you quickly continue. “But he’s not the dating type, if that’s what you’re after.”

“Oh, I bet I could change his mind…” She looks to the side where you can see him make his way back. “You’re not interested in him, are you?”

“What!?” Your eyes widen as she suddenly looks back at you. “Of course not! We’re just friends.”

“Good to know.” She gives you a wink and starts welcoming Mark back like he was gone for a week.

You didn’t think it was possible but the drive back is even worst then when you left the house, now that you know she’ll definitely try to get on with him. Could you have told her to back off, that you’re helplessly in love with this man and that if he’s going to date anyone it’s going to be you? Yes. And no. You’d never admit it out loud.

Getting back into the house, you let out a relieved sigh, finally getting away from Gabriela and focusing on your actual friends. The preparations for the big night soon start and you’re not going easy on the drinks, maybe that will make you forget the afternoon and with it the feelings you have for Mark that you insist on denying.

In the club you try to loosen up, move freely to the beat and let the alcohol do its thing as it flows through your body. But then, through the flashing lights you see Gabriela basically throws herself at Mark. Dancing way too close, talking in his ear, leaving her fingerprints all around him.

It’s too much. You can’t stand this anymore.

In a flash you leave the dance floor. You don’t really know where you’re going, you just need to not have them right in front of you right now. As you reach a corridor where the crowd seems to slightly disperse, you lean against the wall, trying your best not to let your knees give into the floor or your eyes give into the tears that are forming.

“Hey, you ok?” A familiar voice accompanies two hands that steady your body.

“Mark?” He’s like a vision standing in front of you, could you be imagining him?

“Yes, it’s me. I got you.” He tightens his grip on you, holding you closer.

“What are you doing here?” You stumble on your words.

“You just left out of nowhere, I was worried.” His eyes scan your body making sure you are ok.

“What about… Gabriela?” Even in your drunk state you can’t help rolling your eyes.

“Who?” He raises his brow and then relaxes his face when he realises who you’re talking about. “I don’t care, I just want to make sure you’re good.”

“Really?” Your eyes tear up again.

“Yeah.” He chuckles at your silly drunk reaction.

“She’s wants you.” You manage to say as much as it breaks your heart.

“So what? I don’t want her.” He claims as if he didn’t even had to think about it. ”I know we agreed we could be with other people, but I only want to be with you.”

Without a second of hesitation you grab his shirt and let your lips clash into his. The alcohol pushed away all your worries, your blockers, anything that got in the way of you accepting your feelings for him. So you don’t care if anybody sees you, you’re done pretending you don’t want this.

“Are you sure about this?” He doesn’t even check if anyone you know might be around, his focus is only you.

“Take me home, Mark.”

Grabbing your hand, he guides you to the entrance, leaving the club without a word to any of your friends. The walk home, even though fairly close, takes twice as long considering you’re having a hard time following a straight line. To be fair, he’s not that sober either, so you stumble together down the road, laughs filling the almost empty street.

As soon as you walk through the door, you’re all over each other. Clothes make a path on the floor until the living room which is as far as you can go, careless if anybody else comes back too. Your naked bodies settle on the big couch where just last night you were making out. Back then you pushed him away when it started to get serious, but not tonight. Tonight you give yourself to him, completely.

Like magic, a condom appears and he struggles to get it down his hardening length. Gently, you push his shoulders so that he sits down as you get on top of him. Grabbing his face, you stare into each others half lidded eyes before enrolling in a passionate kiss, while you slowly descend on his dick that always fills you up just perfectly.

Clumsily, you move up and down his lap, his hands roaming between your waist and your hips, sometimes helping you move, other times just pulling you closer.

In a mess of kisses, touches, moans, sweat, you don’t know how long you ride him on that couch but eventually he gives into the pleasure. His hand lazily sneaks between your bodies, fingers working they’re magic on your core to make sure you get off too. And then you just lay there, lips still slowly moving together as your bodies come down their highs.

Even if you’re both quite drunk, Mark is a little less than you, so he’s conscious enough to pick you up and take you to your bed when you lay your head on his shoulder, still straddling him, ready to fall asleep right there. As he lays you down on the mattress, you seem to mumble something he can’t understand.

“What?” He chuckles.

“Shh, it’s a secret.” You take your index finger to your lips.

“What secret?” He keeps laughing as he pulls the covers over your body, now covered with a random t-shirt he found around and put on you.

“I love you.” With eyes closed you let out a happy sigh.

Mark stops, not knowing what to say but with a smile forming on his face.

“But you can’t know.” His smile fades as you continue. “You don’t date, you just hook up, that’s the deal. We’d never work.”

And with that he just gets up and leaves the room, not even listening to whatever you ramble next, making sure he at least picks up the clothes you both left behind before crashing into his own bed.

The next morning, you wake up groaning as the sun hits your eyes through the window behind you. Apparently you were way drunker than you thought last night because the memories come in flashes. You were dinking at home with your friends. You hit the club. Gabriela and Mark… Mark coming after you. You two kissing? You went back home. You had sex on the living room! And then-

“Morning, ‘friend’…” Your best friend comes sit on your bed when she notices you move around, actually making air quotes on the last word.

“What?” You mumble, covering your face to block the light.

“Yeah, friends don’t disappear without saying a word!” Crossing her arms she pretends to be upset.

“Sorry, I was-”

“Way too drunk? Oh, we noticed.” She chuckles. “Good thing, Mark brought you home. At least I hope so as he was the only one else home when we arrived.”

Mark. After you fucked he brought you to bed. And then-

“But girl you missed the best part!” She excited but actually tones her voice down, even if it’s only the two of you in the room at the moment. “Gabriela freaked out last night.”

“What do you mean?” Upon hearing the name you sit up, instantly regretting with the throbbing on your head.

“She left the dance floor to go to the bathroom or whatever and when she came back she was all upset, saying things like ‘that bitch’, ‘how could she’, ‘fucking liar’!” She perfectly re-enacts Gabriela’s mannerisms, almost making you laugh until you realise: she must’ve seen you and Mark kiss on the club, just hours after you told her you were not interested.

“Did she say who she was talking about?” You tentatively ask, hoping she didn’t.

“No!” She looks disappointed not to have gotten the full tea.

“Is she around?” You’re suddenly aware this girl might just burst through the door and come at you.

“That’s the weirdest part, she just left!” You feel your shoulders relax in relief. “That friend of hers came back to get their stuff and they just went back home. I really don’t know why Jaehyun keeps inviting these random girls into our friends getaways… Anyway, breakfast?”

With a nod, you drag yourself out of bed and get a quick shower before you join the gang in the kitchen. The water hitting your head is like a medieval torture method, but the way it runs down your body actually feels pretty nice. Like the sweat travelling through your skin last night.

Last night. Right. Mark helped you to bed. And then…Shit! Did you really tell him you love him? Or did you dream it? Shit! Maybe he doesn’t remember. Yeah, he was drunk too. Hopefully too drunk.

After putting some clothes on, you carefully step into the kitchen, watching out for Mark. Maybe his reaction when he sees you will tell you if he heard you or not. But he’s nowhere to be found, could he have left too?

Gathering some things, not much, on a plate, you notice some people are eating outside, enjoying the sun. And you finally spot him. He seems… Normal? He has seen you yet, though. You decide to go outside as well, spotting a place not too close to him that he’d might feel uncomfortable but not too far from him that it would seem like you’re avoiding him.

You do a general greeting before sitting down but fail to look straight at his face, suddenly feeling embarrassed. After a while, some people head back inside, including Mark, which leaves you a bit disappointed. However he comes back out taking a seat next to you.

“Hangover?” He simply asks, facing the pool outside.

“Terribly.” You both chuckle. “You?”

“Probably a little less than you.” Silence instals after, why does this feel so awkward?

“Look, about last night…” You start saying after a while.

“Don’t worry about it.” He interrupts. “We’re good.”

And just like that silence settles in again. What can you say after that? Worst thing is, that doesn’t even give you an answer as to wether he heard it or not.

Later that day, everybody starts packing to get back home. You and Mark don’t really exchange any further words than a quick goodbye as you do to everyone else. And that ends up extending to the following week. He used to text you some times, even if it was just with a funny meme, but not even that this time. You’re the one that sent him a meme or two but he just reacts with a crying laughing emoji, no words.

The following weekend you’ve had enough. You miss him. Not just physically, you miss his essence, the way he brightens your day, the way he’s just… Him. So you give him a call.

We’re sorry, the number you’re trying to reach is not available right now.

But it rang before. So you know he declined. Now you’re sure. He heard you. He heard you say you love him. But he also heard say you’d never work. How could you have been so stupid? All this time he’s been trying to tell you he feels something for you, whatever it is. So much that he’s willing to actually settle down with you. And you’ve been a total idiot pretending you don’t want it too. So what if it ends up not working out? Life isn’t perfect and not everything goes according to plan, but you gotta live a little. Do you really want to let something good just slip through your fingers?

That’s it. You grab a jacket and head out the door, straight up to Mark’s place, not even bothering to change the old ass leggings and t-shirt you have underneath. As you get there, you knock on the door and wait, able to hear cheers and video game sounds coming from outside.

“Hey!” Johnny greets you at the door. “What’s up?”

“Yeah, not much.” You awkwardly smile at the small talk, re-thinking if you should actually be doing this. “Is, hm, Mark here?”

“Oh, let me check.” He goes back in and you wonder if Mark told him to pretend he wasn’t around.

You wait patiently outside, starting to believe he might never come and considering just going back home. Until finally Mark comes to the door. Casual sweat pants and shirt, hood over his head to cover his messy hair. How can he just look so good at all times?

“Hey…” His voice is raspy, like he hasn’t talked in a while, maybe you just miss him too much cause you feel it between your thighs.

“Hi.” You manage to say even though nothing comes out after it.

“You ok?” He eventually asks.

“Yeah, you?” You internally cringe at this whole interaction. “I called earlier, but you didn’t answer.”

“Sorry, I was taking a nap.” That explains the voice, but he did decline the call though… “Do you need something?”

“Can we talk?”

“Aren’t we already?” He chuckles and it actually helps lighten the mood.

“Yeah, well, not here.” You glance inside and see a few curious heads hide. “Can we go for a walk?”

“Hm…” He looks down at his clothes wondering if he should change, but then he sees what you’re wearing too. “Sure.”

Mark grabs his keys and you two start going down the street. The first steps are silent, until you turn the corner and you decide to finally confirm.

“That night at the house… You heard what I said didn’t you?” You keep looking ahead, not able to glance his way.

“What part?” He asks, not looking at you either. “When you said you love me, or when you said I’m just a hook up and we could never work?”

You curse under your breath. He did listen to every single word.

“If you came to apologize, you don’t have to.” He continues.

“Actually I do.” You stop walking and hold his arms making him stop as well. “Not because you heard it, but because that’s not what I really meant.”

“What do you mean?”

“What I mean is…” You take a deep breath and decide to just let it all out. “I don’t think you’re just a hook up. I would like to give us a chance if you want it too. And if we end up not working out, at least we know we tried. The only thing I said truthful that night was that I actually love you. More than I though I ever would.”

“So why aren’t we having this conversation back in the house?” He shrugs. “You’re saying all those things because it’s just the two of us here. I’ve been trying to tell you all this time that I love you but you’re always worried somebody will find out about us. I’m tired of this game, I’m tired of being your toy.”

“Mark, you’re not a toy, I promise. I really love you and I don’t want to hide anymore.” You plea grabbing both his hands.

“Than prove it.” He says looking straight into your eyes.

“How?”

“Figure it out.” He lets go of your hands and keeps walking.

For a few seconds you wonder how you’ll make him believe you as you watch him get further away. Then your grab you phone and make a call.

“Hey, Ahreum.”

At the sound of your best friend’s name, Mark turns around wondering what you’re doing.

“I have something to tell you.”

He knows you two long enough to know you tell each other everything, she’s one of the most important people in your life.

“Thing is… I’m in love.”

But he also knows you never told her anything about the two of you.

“And the person I’m in love with is-”

You get cut off when he runs back, embracing you with a kiss. You can’t help melt into him, arms wrapping around his waist to pull him closer.

“Thank you.” He whispers before joining your lips once more.

Around you two it’s only the sound of happiness of two friends who unexpectedly found love in each other and decided to give it a chance.

That and the sound of your best friend screaming through the phone.

“WHAT?? WHO IS IT?? HELLO!!”

☽ ・・・・・ ☾

taglist: not sure if I should still have a taglist, it's been so long and a lot of people deactivated... should I do a new taglist?

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