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@jamiexsong
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parkxjoonho:
“You won’t. But if you did, yes.” Joon nodded. He probably wasn’t in the right mindset for joking about that, which was frustrating because Joon knew he was acting different and he didn’t want to. They were supposed to be having fun. And being frustrated that he was worried—worried over what was probably nothing—only felt like it was becoming amplified due to their surroundings. It was too loud and there were too many people. Still, he tried to ignore it. “I’d like that. It’s a date, then. If you end up liking it.” Joon smiled. And he laughed at the face Jamie made after trying a sip. “Definitely acquired.” Joon traded him to try, slightly wrinkling his nose at the taste. But then Jamie called him out and he couldn’t help chewing on the inside of his lip. “I am worried. But it’s dumb. And this isn’t a good time to talk.” Joon shook his head, trying to dismiss it. “I won’t worry. As long as you’re in a good place.” He swapped their drinks back and took a sip, glancing around and changing the subject. “You wanna find the others?”
“That’s reassuring” Jamie smiled at Joon, always able to count with him to have the faith in himself that sometimes he lacked of. He liked thinking of future plans, of things to do, even when he knew Joon would be happy with just laying down and eating whatever they found, Jamie liked to think of plans and nice things to do together. Maybe it was because he always felt he lacked time, that he wanted to make out the most of the time they did have together, even when it wasn’t necessary. “Yours doesn’t taste much better” He complained, giving him the glass back because he figured he could do beer for tonight. Maybe next time he would go for a fancy and sweet drink that didn’t taste so bitter. “Okay, but whenever you want to, we can, just... don’t worry, I’m good” He didn’t want to be the reason for Joon to worry. “Do I want to stay with my boyfriend and take advantage of how touchy he gets when he drinks? Or do I want to find the others? Tough call” he joked, smiling “Let’s go find everyone else”
a baby.
parkxjoonho:
Shocked was definitely a word Joon would use. Along with worried yet amused. Jamie never really did give him a clear response when he asked if everything was okay. He just kind of changed the topic, which made Joon a little anxious. Maybe there was just some misinterpretation. It still wasn’t the easiest place to hold a conversation, signing or not. “As long as you don’t become an alcoholic, we’re good.” He poked his boyfriend’s nose with a smile. “I have no clue. Maybe it’s all of those things. I think it’s an inter… interchangeable word? Spa? I dunno.” Joon nodded. “We can do that. Next time. You’ll be a pro at whatever spas are.” Joon just simply watched Jamie with a smirk, nodding along a little until his boyfriend leaned in to kiss him, making him giggle. “Beer it is, then.” Taking his hand, they made their way towards the bar and managed to order two different beers, Joon figuring it allowed them to give it a try. He raised one of the glasses to Jamie to clink them together with a grin before taking a drink. “This one isn’t bad. Try?”
“I don’t think I will, but if I start giving off the signs, I got you and Chris to keep me on track, right?” He asked with a goofy smile. Jordan would probably be on board with drinking every time he asked, so it wasn’t like he didn’t trust them, he just knew Chris and Joon would pay more attention to any concerning signs. “I’ll be a pro, you’re right, this will be like an investigative mission, and if it ends up being great, I’m taking you there” Because it would be nice to relax together. He followed him to the bar, smiling all the time, taking his glass and clinking it with Joon’s, taking a sip and making a face. “They say it’s an acquired taste, right?” It wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t the most tasteful drink ever. “You know, sometimes you look at me like you’re worried, I don’t like worrying you” He commented, trying his best for Joon to be able to read his lips if the music made it harder for him to understand what he said. “I’m happy, you know? Not just because you make me happy, or my family and friends make me happy. I’m in a good place, so stop worrying”
mom I love him 🥺
bonus:
parkxjoonho:
“Because you were drunk?” Joon couldn’t help but smile out of amusement too. “I can almost picture it. You should have slowed down, you dork. You don’t drink, it’ll catch up to you a lot faster than your brother.” Because if they were being honest, Joon was sure Chris probably did things Jamie didn’t know about it. Maybe he was wrong. Not like Joon could really say much though. He wasn’t a drinker either. But it had its benefits because he could reach that euphoric state a lot faster with less. “I dunno. I’ve never been to one. I thought they were like, those steam rooms and massages?” Joon immediately shook his head at the offer. “They invited you. You should go.” He didn’t think someone being a third wheel would be an issue, but it was a plan that Jordan extended to Jamie, and Jamie only. Joon wasn’t going to be that person. “People are always gonna complain about things that don’t have anything to do with themselves. You haven’t had anyone complain that you need a haircut yet? I think this baby faced doctor always looks good. And I do like the longer hair.” Joon ran his fingers through the back of it, kissing him again. Something else that came with that euphoric state was wanting to remain close, which didn’t work in this setting, so Joon backed off a little bit to understand what Jamie was saying. “Like a bad taste?… I think I had something called Zombie? I don’t know? You could try a mixed drink. Or shots. Or beer.”
“Because it was so unlike me to be drunk, I talked nonsense and I even started dancing in the middle of the living room, no music involved. I think you would have been shocked” Because Jamie spent all of his life staying away from alcohol yet there he had been, getting drunk voluntarily. It was definitely out of character but he was trying new things, and drinking hadn’t killed him or anything. “So you mean practice means perfect? I could take it little by little, one drink today, one on the next party, I don’t intend on becoming a regular drinker but one is not bad at all” And Joon himself didn’t drink much and Jamie wanted to keep trying. “Oh, I thought it was like, hair and nails. That only shows how little I know about those things” Maybe because his mother was gone, he simply didn’t have that knowledge. “If I like it we could go together next time then” He wouldn’t insist, but he would like to share that with Joon if it ended up being fun. “No, not about the haircut, the baby face is a trouble with the oldest patients, they don’t trust I know shit” He giggled, that wasn’t his fault but it didn’t bother him that much. “I like the fact that you like longer hair” Because Jamie really digged it. “Beer, I think I’m ready to try beer tonight” He said as he leaned and stole another kiss from him.
jungkook for 2020 season’s greetings
parkxjoonho:
“Deal.” Hearing him giggle again was contagious, making Joon break into a smile. A smile that only grew wider once he learned that Chris apparently took his phone at the time, and had he not, Joon would have received plenty of drunk texts he probably wouldn’t be able to even begin to decipher. “Yeah? Maybe it was for the best because I probably would have worried. But thanks for thinking of me even when you’re drunk.” It was Joon’s turn to giggle now, kissing him. “I like it. A spa?” He kind of kept playing with Jamie’s hair, running his fingers through it and tucking it back again. Joon wasn’t jealous. Just maybe a little… territorial? Especially when Jordan was as flirty as they were. But they introduced Ri Ahn to him and Jamie, and Jordan did get a hold of Joon the other day when Jamie was really upset. “That sounds nice. I think you could be capable of pulling off different colors, though. I didn’t think I’d pull off blue.” He shrugged. “You look good no matter what. And as long as you’re happy. That’s all that matters.” Joon pulled him into an obnoxious kiss, pressing their lips together and giving a small mwah! as he pulled away with a grin. “Let’s get a drink?”
“You would have thought I was dying or something, or that maybe I was kidnapped and drugged” Jamie said with an amused smile because honestly, he had never been drunk before and he was pretty sure he hadn’t maged it to well. Again, maybe the first few drinks were okay, but he blamed Chris for taking it too far. “Yeah, I have no idea what people do in a spa but apparently they also take care of your hair? You wanna join us?” He asked, because it would be cool to share it all together and just have a good time relaxing and doing whatever people did in those places. “I’m not sure the hospital, or well, the patients would like a baby faced doctor with blue hair” He chuckled, trying to imagine how they would take him serious. He giggled again with the kiss, nodding. “What should we have? Chris gave me vodka so I think I should try something different, my stomach still feels weird when I remember how that tasted” Which was crazy because he could swear vodka didn’t even have a strong flavor, but maybe he was just a little traumatized.
parkxjoonho:
“Ah, so you’ll get high and drink with your brother but not me?” There was a smirk on his lips, signifying that he wasn’t being serious. It was weird because Joon was so used to hearing Jamie always say he wanted to be one hundred percent sober all the time so that he had a sharp mind. Maybe Chris corrupted him just enough to lighten up a little. “I’m nicer than him. I wouldn’t let you drink so much that you got sick. But now I’m a little disappointed I didn’t get any drunk texts.” Joon took Jamie’s hand and gave him a twirl when he agreed that they could dance, laughing. “No heart attacks for you! And what’s the fun in warning? It ruins the surprise.” He tucked some of Jamie’s hair back behind an ear with a smile. “I think this is the longest I’ve ever seen your hair. Everything’s okay, right?” Joon wasn’t sure why the question suddenly slipped, especially now of all times. The alcohol probably. But he had been worried about Jamie lately. All of the little changes. It was different, and Joon wasn’t sure if he should be concerned or not.
“Well, it wasn’t really planned but we can try it together next time, I wouldn’t mind” He giggled again like a fool because it wasn’t like he planned on Chris getting him high and drunk, and it was hilarious to think that he let his baby brother do all of those things when he was always giving him speeches about responsibility and such. “He took my phone and hid it, it was one of the conditions because I didn’t want you to worry, I did talk a lot about how hot you are and how I missed you” He assured him because he was pretty sure that if he had his phone with him, he would have sent hundreds of texts to Joon. “Just so I can be a little prepared, you keep taking my breath away” And he was never prepared to see him looking like this. “You like it? I’m letting it grow, Jordan said we could go to a spa and play a little with our hair, and since I don’t really think I’m capable of pulling any colors, I’m letting it grow, you know, to change a little” He thought it was a good idea to change the haircut that he had since he was like, twelve.
parkxjoonho:
Joon smiled at Jamie’s giggle, taking a small step back when he saw him trying to sign, giving some space to do so. “What do you want? I know you don’t like drinking, so we can dance?” He didn’t necessarily care to drink either; he could do without. But when it came to parties, it felt like the only way Joon could tolerate them. He loosened up with a few drinks and didn’t care as much whether or not he felt left out because he was content just walking around and people watching. And while Joon had initially signed as he spoke, he couldn’t help moving closer again after laughing at his boyfriend’s comment, arm around Jamie’s waist and planting another kiss on his lips. “I just like you. Glasses or no glasses. But they are a cute addition. And good! I’m glad there are still ways I can surprise you.”
“I just want to hang out with you” Because Jamie was a sucker for Joon “I don’t mind drinking, I mean, as long as it’s just one and I don’t end up like the other night with Chris I’ll be fine” Because he had enjoyed the first cup his brother had given him, it was after the fourth or fifth that everything went to hell. “But yeah, we could dance too” Because this was a party after all and everyone at the dance floor seemed like having fun. He giggled at his comment about his glasses, he always thought he looked like a dork so it was a good thing that Joon liked them. “Next time maybe give me heads up, I’m a healthy kid but heart attacks can cause my death”
parkxjoonho:
Joon grinned, not even realizing how entertaining his own words had been considering Jamie’s costume. “No, but I’m the most important one and that’s all that matters.” Smile still plastered on his lips, he draped an arm around the back of his boyfriend’s neck and kissed him. Joon finished off the last bit of his drink before looking back to Jamie with his brow raised, taking a moment to piece together what he thought he’d said. “It’s hard to follow what everyone’s saying, so I thought I’d walk around to see costumes. Then I ended up finding someone that smelled like they’ve been smoking weed for a week straight and when I turned around, I ran into you. You definitely have the cutest costume here.” He poked the bridge of Jamie’s glasses with a smile.
Jamie chuckled at Joon’s words and wrapped an arm around his waist when he was being kissed, tasting his drink on his lips and giggling because of it. “You want to dance? Or drink? Or I don’t know, whatever you want?” He made sure to sign because the music was loud and indeed it would be harder for Joon to follow conversations like this, specially with the lights of this place. “You just like how I look with glasses” He added, pointing to his face. “You look hot, like, super hot, I thought the blue hair incident would be the only time where I would be starstruck with how you look but, fuck me up, here I am, you’re doing it again” He signed.
Any ordinary day, Joonho could be pretty spaced out. Add alcohol? He was wandering around aimlessly, admiring everyone’s costumes without a care in the world. Joon thought about heading outside for a moment just to try and get away from the crowd. There were heat lamps, it could work. Plus, the boots and leather jacket he was sporting were pretty cozy. Whether he was heading there or not, he ended up running into a group of people that smelled so strong of weed that it was repulsive. Joon turned around and in doing so, ended up running straight into someone. He froze for a moment, blinking and glad there wasn’t much left of his drink because one of them probably would have been wearing it. Once he finally looked up though, he smiled. “I found you!”
Jamie chuckled, rolling his eyes “Do you realize how many people has said the exact same thing when they see me?” Apparently, finding Waldo was the highlight of a lot of people’s night, so Jamie had heard the same phrase lots of times already, and the night was just starting. “You’re really hard to find though, where have you been?” One second they were talking to some friends and the next one Joon had disappeared, which didn’t alarm Jamie, but after a while, he decided to hunt down his boyfriend because he couldn’t get enough of his look tonight.
jordanxcampbell:
Jordan nodded, rubbing Jamie’s back. “That makes sense. I don’t think you’ll ever be a man with an ice heart, though. You don’t have to worry about that.” Maybe it would hurt less in time. The pain wouldn’t go away, but maybe it wouldn’t be this bad. There had to be some sort of middle ground, right? “Of course. I can do that.” Jordan tucked some of Jamie’s hair back behind his ear, chuckling at the fact that they could even do that, but also at his sandwich comment. “No pouting, my precious child. We’ll get that frown turned upside down.” Jordan managed to wriggle their phone from their pocket, texting Joon with one hand while the other kept rubbing Jamie’s back. “Something about me? Oof… I don’t know. Um. I almost got my tongue pierced? I had the appointment with a friend and everything. She got hers done first and I immediately chickened out after seeing the needle.” It was a wonder how they managed to get the ear piercings they had. Then again, they couldn’t really watch it happening.
“So I’ll suffer like this each time?” Jamie asked in a whisper, not even wanting to say these words out loud “I don’t want to forget her name, I don’t want her to just... be another number, you know? Like, I want to remember them all and I’m scared I won’t be able to do that” Because it was Jamie’s thing to be sensitive like that, to make sure he never lost his most human side, that he didn’t turn into one of those doctors who acted like robots and didn’t care about their patients. “Middle ground, I’d like that” He should ask his dad how he managed to deal with this, but his dad was wiser, he had always been a better man than Jamie. “Do you even know how many bacteria are in those piercings? Like, no matter how many times you brush your teeth, your tongue is going to be bacteria soup forever, and you might even break your roof above the tongue and it will never be the same” Jamie started rambling, grateful for the change of topic because this was something that would distract him. “You won’t be able to kiss that friend of yours ever again, your tongue will break in two, no one will want to do tongue things with you” Okay, now he was just exaggerating but he just needed to distract himself and teasing Jordan seemed like the right thing to do.
jordanxcampbell:
Jordan welcomed Jamie against their shoulder, wrapping their arms around him in return as he cried there. They hugged him tight for a moment before resting a hand near the back of his head, playing with his hair while the other arm remained curled around his frame. “Unfortunately.” Jordan nodded. “There are a lot of ups and downs that come with being a doctor. You can bring life into this world, too. And I know you can’t be the only one that struggles. It just means you have a heart. One of the warmest hearts I know.” They tried to look down where Jamie seemed to bury himself against their shoulder, making an attempt to wipe his tears. “It’s okay to cry and be upset. I just don’t want this to affect you psychologically, you know? You did everything you could and more.” They gave him another squeeze. “Do you want me to get a hold of Joon?” After all, Joon could probably cheer him up better than Jordan could. He probably had a better idea of what to say. “Something to eat? Drink? Tell me what you want and I’ll make it happen.”
Jamie did feel more calm now that Jordan had their arms wrapped around him, but the sadness inside of him was one that he couldn’t just ignore, which was why he kept sobbing, but this time it was more calm. “I know this will keep happening and I think it will always affect me?” He asked, because that was what worried him the most. Would it get better? “I don’t want to think of a day where these things doesn’t make me sad, I don’t want to turn into a man with an ice heart who doesn’t feel anything but... but I also don’t want to feel this way, you know?” He made no sense, he just wanted the impossible and he knew it. “Can you call him and stay? Can I have you two? Like in a sandwich” He commented with a pout, because right now he could only imagine himself surrounded by those who he loved the most. “Just distract me, tell me something about you”
jordanxcampbell:
When Jamie shook his head, Jordan immediately respected that and didn’t ask anymore. They didn’t want to pry for anything. They just wanted to make sure Jamie knew he wasn’t alone. But he started talking about her after all, and Jordan felt like they needed to get Jamie to sit down at the very least before he’d end up collapsing. Especially once that one single word left Jamie’s lips. One arm around his waist, Jordan started walking him towards his bedroom, nodding as he spoke and wiping at his face. “The world is cruel, and some things we don’t have control of. But you know something you did have control of?” Jordan managed to shake the sleeve of their hoodie down over their hand, using it to wipe any snot from Jamie’s nose before bopping it. And damn, they could feel their own eyes starting to sting now. “You gave her some of her better days towards the end. Instead of treating her like another statistic, you were there for her. And when she needed it the most.” They crawled onto Jamie’s bed and sat in the middle, propping their back up and patting their lap. “Come here, baby.” If Jamie just wanted to sit next to them, use them as a pillow, fall asleep on them, cry until he couldn’t any more… Jordan didn’t care. Whatever Jamie needed, they would do.
Sitting down, Jamie realized he wasn’t even ware they were standing before. It was like his mind was just clouded with sorrow and pain, too focused on his sadness to even notice anything. “I know the world is the cruelest, I’m just, so sad” And Jamie knew this was part of life, he knew people died, he had experienced it first hand with his mother and yes, it was a nice thought to have to know that he at least gave her some happiness, but life was so unfair, she shouldn’t have died, she should have had longer in this place, she should have spent her years playing outside, growing up, living her own life. He moved, wrapping arms around Jordan and resting his head against their shoulder as he sobbed and cried some more, wondering if he could ever get this sadness out of his system. “This will keep happening, you know? She’s not the first and she won’t be the last one, how am I going to be a doctor if I can’t deal with death?”
jordanxcampbell:
This was what worried Jordan. Jamie had such a caring, warm heart. They could only assume he lost another patient, and it tore him up every time. Jordan worried about his mental state when this happened. And all they could really do was hope that it didn’t haunt him. They took their arms back and switched positions once again, coming around to face Jamie as he seemed to break down even further. Jordan gently held Jamie’s face, wiping his tears, waiting for his cries to settle down a little more before softly asking: “Do you wanna talk about her?” If it would help, they wanted to offer. “I know it doesn’t make it any easier but you did everything you could. It’s not your fault, okay? She was lucky to have you there.” Jordan went back to messing with Jamie’s hair, pushing it out of his face and wiping more tears.
Jamie shook his head. He didn’t want to talk about her but at the same time, he did, so he honestly wasn’t sure of what he wanted to do. He wanted to curl up in his bed and cry for the rest of the day, but Jordan was here and he didn’t want to put that emotional baggage on them. “She was a toddler, I wasn’t even her doctor, I mean...” Jamie started talking because apparently, he did want to talk about her. “I played with her every day” He sobbed again, tears falling down his cheeks. “She had cancer” Like his mom, and maybe that’s why it hit him so hard. “And we played, every day. She had gone home, she was okay... until she wasn’t anymore”