juke mix

HI my name is Jaime. means I love in french. I love many things Friends, family, hogwarts. my house is Ravenclaw. But most importantly i love my Boyfriend, cannot live without him. 

[beetlejump]

[zweilous]

how do i fix this drawing ;O;

[jaygurl89]

i love this!

[gggermicide]

Tepig

[jaygurl89]

My new fave Pok’emon, cute but a Badass!

[jewshboy]

I love having my peroid

-Said no woman EVER (via yousexxyasshole)

[cool-story-babe96]

My friend must love me to get this stuff from me :p don’t mind the name she out it there!(:

[jaygurl89]

hahaha oh yes. 

[jaygurl89]

Period: eat everything

Period: let's ruin your fav undies

Period: especially chocolate

Period: I'm also going to make you feel like I'm constantly punching you

Period: gonna make you super horny

Period: don't care if your just been crying for about 10mins your gonna be in a fucking happy now!

Period: gonna make you feel paranoid I've came through

Me:

[jaygurl89]

Let me be me. i’ll let you be you.

I found out the gutting truth for so long it feels like we are shifting miles apart. my mind whirls with whys? when? and is he proud of me? I am unable to cope with the fact my partner wont tell his parents I’m Deaf. Its i huge part of me...  we’ve been going out 7-8 months now.... i asked him when we first started going out to tell his parents... he still haven’t. Had another fight just recently about it. He says “soon i will, when its the right time.” I do not understand. It feels like he wont... 

“What when we are about to get married?!” I say with tears falling down and my chest tight. I want him to be proud of me... I’m not going to change. What his parents know about me feel like a lie. I feel like i lied when i haven’t... It bothers me deeply. He tells me not to tell my parents about the fight. i want to but i feel bad if i do. 

I don’t know what to do. most nights hes moody because of his work, He throws wobbles if something isn’t his way..its starting to feel.... wrong. 

what the hell happened we were so good. free. enjoyed each other.... i still love him so much but so confused what to do since we live together.... what to do... i have no idea.....

[jaygurl89]

To care or not to care.

You’ve always been the good one. Never in trouble with the law, followed rules, but also wayyyyy too kind and caring. People always telling you, “you are kind” “You are way to nice” Perhaps a bad thing??? 

You always care about other feelings before your own. you don’t want to get in the way in the end people just... push you at the side when you really need them. Seem familiar? Its a cold world that we have built, full of self centered complainers. You are just fiddling in the corner trying to stay out of fights but trying to keep your close friends together. Its not working! It feels like a earthquake as more time that pass, the more you grow apart.  

Boyfriends, Partners, Marriage, Children-are these making us part?? If so its just a small change? You may say i have changed but what about you??? I cannot deny that we were best friends am i holding to hard to what used to be? Maybe. Maybe we evolved into a better human than before? I keep hoping you will say hello but all i can feel you pass me by as you become to busy with work and love. 

True to say “i have a life” but what if i just want a tiny part of your life because you and i been though rough seas. To care or not to care is a question indeed. Whether we lie though our teeth and put on a mark to say “i’m fine” I’m not. I care but you do not. you appear to want to leave me stranded and say “you will work it out” 

I’ll still love you no matter how much have passed. Sail back to me friend. I’ll leave the light on in my heart. 

[br-e-a-t-h-e]

[in-pursuit-of-fitness]

health | Tumblr on We Heart It - http://weheartit.com/entry/191266075

[nikesoftball]

STAY STRONG

[jaygurl89]

To deal and carry on.

So as most of  you know i suffer from panic attacks/ anxiety which are about the most stupid things. It was putting pressure on my well being and affecting others around me eppish my relationships. So how have have i dealt with it. I’ll share and i hope you, my friend will try and do the same, to allow yourself be free and less stressed and worried. 

1) Headspace which is a app. Its mediation ten minutes a day to get you to train your brain and removing all the bad storms you face. I do this when i need to i prefer to at night.. but morning is a good time too there is all sorts that it focuses depending on your needs. I fully recommend this!

https://www.headspace.com/

or go to your apps on your phone and type in Headspace. 

2) A walk with music or walking your dog. Now i know many think why bother but i try to walk every day to get some sun which has a great effect on me. When i reflected back i noticed i wasn't getting in sun. plus you did something for the day bravo!

3) A hug. Hugs. human contact is important. One hug can go a long way... i mean look at these “Professional huggers” (Yes its a real thing). A hug is even more special if its from someone you love.

4) Go for a mini holiday. Doesn't have to be 2 weeks can be just a weekend.. different scene and can give the mind a sense of relaxation and enjoyment. 

if you found other ways to cope/deal with add. lets help the world and each other. You just need time and well... you wont get better instantly but it will help you feel strong as yo take each day as it comes! 

[jaygurl89]

You WILL be OK.

No one will judge you. Infact it will be one of your demons. If you haven't experienced it you might... but lets just hope you never do. It is one of those things comes on slowly and feels like its strangling you. That’s right, Attacks. ether panic or anxiety attack. 

I never thought it was possible for me to have one.. i mean i’m such a positive bubbly person I always fight though anything.. but little did i know i did. It started with pains in my chest, i ignored them and thought i pulled something... but then then one night after watching or trying to finish a thing on Netflix i had it. I thought i was having a heart attack, my breathing slowed, my body was shaking there was no denying it I thought i was going to die. But I dint want to!! i had so much happening for me! whaaat? no! My parents called ambulance for me they came which seemed forever... it wasn't related to my heart no. it was just a panic attack. From there on i wanted to get though this dark time. 

The next few days were hard because i moved in with my wonderful boyfriend, i had a few little panic attacks.. this went on for a week it was horrible. i put my foot down and seeked help. My therapist was great, she could relate to me and we got down to what was really the anxiety behind everything. She taught me breathing exercises, which i do whenever i get a bad thought and put my hands on my head and just count to 20. I know if i can get though that 20 seconds i can get though the next. so just 20 at a time. Also I try to limit the news as a lot of the bad bombings and to do with Paris and things stressed me. My last helpful thing is to keep a positive book about all the good things that happened that day which i do at the end of the day before I sleep. 

Now i am a lot more happy and feel more centred.Please if you are suffering do not ignore it. go and get help at least get ways how to cope. Its not a bad thing to ask for help.

People are so scared about being vulnerable.... we are just humans... not machines... we all have our demon. 

[jaygurl89]

A Whole New world.

My life has changed, i never thought i would depend on someone let alone start thinking about the future with someone . 

It all started in May we met online then grew to Skype chats then decided to meet and see if you click. His name is Vicky, 23 year old Indian guy. He was so nervous it was so cute! Its nothing like movies but there was a click and i felt it. As my heart was drumming so loudly i asked him to come closer and we kissed!!! that kiss was all i needed! Pretty quickly after a week or so we become official on the 27 of may! We haven’t looked back. 

Vicky is kind, funny and when he tries the kiwi accent i cant help to laugh and kiss him! His background is Punjabi at first i was worried that his family wouldn't let us date because i know in some Indian family's do things differently. Nope it was fine. 

I Miss him greatly when we are apart though out the week. Weekends become magical full of laughter, smiles and kisses and hugs. 

He is not just my boyfriend but Best friend, we share worries and also our fears and achievements. He always tells me that i am his life, i believe him because he shows it in many ways. I trust him, probably the first guy i trust fully and not feel scared h is going to run away on me. 

All our friends and families are happy for us that we both found each other. 

I’m not going to lie though we do have our differences as i am a Deaf kiwi and he is a Hearing Indian, But we work well as our differences has only brought us closer together.  

 I wouldn't change anything at all! I love him with everything I have! Our life is going to be beautiful. 

[jaygurl89]

My life, My choices,

We all make mistakes, we all tend to think its a good thing at the time and the next day think CRAP, DID THAT HAPPEN!” it happens.. when the most unlikely times when you aren’t expecting it. 

For me men always been compacted, i didn't think i could understand one. If you asked me oh you happy about it?? Yeah, but the aftermath was not what i was expecting. I was not expecting to be so emotions, people play on that. I for one am glad that he was kind, caring and he’s still my friend. 

Why is it that people think the worst of that person, no even i wasn't expecting it but it felt right for me.. not for them why should they get to make rules of my life? no. Moments like this will stay with me though a lifetime.. it is the reason we live is it not??? 

As awkward as i am, i am glad someone could care for me... care for me in the most unique way that i didn't think was possible. Being in your mid 20s means to make mistakes... even if people say no don't!!! you should just go with your gut. People really just should step back and just be there.

Overall, its not a crime! so don’t make it seem like one. to me now it seems like chocolate so forbidden but people just want to. i do not have  a boyfriend.. but its a baby step for me understanding how guys can be awesome. how they aren't all jerks. Its given me a new start to view guys in a different light. Its allowing yourself to be taken on that adventure is the problem because us women, over think. STOOOP OVER THINKING! Just live. and if others have a problem? ignore them. 

[jaygurl89]

Show respect!

a little rant: Some people have to learn more respect towards culture and differences. Yes i am different in many ways, BUT that does not mean you have the right to make fun of my culture OR language OR disability! Treat me how you want to be treated or don't talk or interact with me at all!!! I will not put up with it any more!!! When i say its not ok, IT IS NOT OK!

[animalsnaps]