Coach Jeff's Blog

Hi I'm Jeff. I hope you enjoy my views on baseball, family life, P.R., suburbia and basically anything related to the adventure that comes with being a dad and husband in these crazy, modern times. Enjoy!

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Hanging up my Spikes

As we prepare to say goodbye to 2018, the time also seems right to put #CoachJeff on the shelf. 

Over the course of the last 7 years, I have enjoyed the opportunity to tell interesting stories and pass along useful information. I’ve heard from lots of nice folks who followed the blog or passed along kudos via social media. Or, occasionally, someone would stop me and say “Hey, I really enjoyed your feature on xxx.”

I could keep it going, no doubt. Indeed, the infamous Blog Idea Source Folder is not completely empty.

But, I don’t want to be like that party guest who lingers too long or the ol’ guy who keeps re-telling the same tales. It has been a while since Coach Jeff laced up his cleats. Tonight, I’m hanging up my spikes.

If I were to have continued the blog into the new year, there would have been stories to tell, for sure. For instance, one of my new year’s resolutions for 2019 is to try to reconnect with old friends. I’m sure there would be some interesting opportunities if my pursuit is fruitful. Also, the grand ol’ game, itself, provides surprises each season. As we’re less than two months away from Spring Training, I’m sure there’d be some interesting story ideas to come.

Still, considering it has been eight years since I last coached, it seems like the time is right for a break from blogging about coaching youth baseball. Also, I get the sense that the game, taught at that level, has changed since I filled out my last line-up card. 

Whereas, I think the themes of teaching hustle, respect and an appreciation for the game will be relevant, there is probably another generation of coaches about to “age out” of the youth leagues and they will be looking for a creative outlet. I’ll pass the virtual baton to them.

Not saying it is implausible that I might find an itch to post, again, in the future. Maybe a #FarmerJeff blog, someday, about the success of growing vegetables would be in the offing. 

But for now, I’m ready for a winter break.

To everyone who has followed the blog, I’d like to say a heartfelt “thanks.” That also goes to anyone who suggested an idea, re-tweeted a link, liked a post or passed along kudos.

My wishes for you al—indeed, prayers for us all—is a safe, healthy and happy 2019. And beyond.

JG

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Seventeen Hundred

Over the course of 7 years and let’s call it 1,700 posts, I’ve touched on a number of topics (1,700 because...you know...17).

The expressed purpose of Coach Jeff’s Blog was to discuss the game of baseball and how we teach it to young people; how we instill for them a lifelong passion for the game we love so much.

I talked at length about how we built the Choppers from a low-level rec league team that struggled to win a game to a successful local and somewhat regional AA travel team. As I have said more than once, we won more than our share of games and I'm quite thankful about that. 

And it has been fun to write about those successes.

More globally, I touched on the ways volunteer coaches go about teaching the sport: from how to recruit and manage volunteers, to dealing with parents, to setting up a practice. I talked about the life of being a league official, too. I blogged about relating to umpires, managing staff and volunteers, maintaining fields and setting a schedule.

That type of content was a core pillar of #CoachJeff. But I’ve also digressed into other topics along the course of the 1,700.

Some of my favorite posts were ones like the recent #CoachJeff blogs leading up to Christmas. And, annually—also around the holidays—I did a two-part feature recapping our family’s Top 10 stories of the year.

Speaking of the holidays, I wrote about the Swedish tradition of watching Disney cartoons at Christmas and I described the Blue Jays’ practice of anting in the back yard.

I’ve covered career planning and goal setting. I described my colonoscopy in 2013 and found myself comforting someone, a reader, who read the blog and was fearful of her upcoming procedure. I discussed growing tomatoes and the beauty of the four seasons in our part of the world.

I’ve written about family vacations, family history and family treasures. 

Things I’ve chosen NOT to write about:

Politics

Religion (other than a few references to our church)

Current Events

My position has been this: if you want to read about those topics, there are plenty of other sources online featuring writers who are much more well informed to write on those topics. And I always figured you came here to escape the heavy news of the day anyway and were in the mood to read something with a lighter touch.

To that extent, I hope I have succeeded.

Tomorrow, we’ll put a bow on the year and wrap things up here on the blog, too. Hope to see you then.

JG

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Graduation Time

Through the holidays, with a little downtime, you have a chance to catch up on news about important people in your life. Past. Present. (And Future?).

During the break, I learned many news updates about former Choppers. 

A former catcher graduated this month and has a great job offer right out of school

Our former closer will graduate in the spring and also has a job offer waiting for him

A former shortstop, and his fiancée, showed off an engagement ring via FB

Another former pitcher also shared the great news of his graduation

For many of them, it is graduation time. And yet, time flies. Yes, though it doesn’t seem like long at all since the Choppers played their last game; it’ll be nine years next summer since we all raised the trophy as champs. 

They’re all grown up now. Indeed, my favorite former Chopper is heading off to take a bite out of the Big Apple; to try his hand at the next step in pursuit of his chosen career.

All this to say, it seems like a pretty good time to give the blog a rest. 

Whereas my coaching plays out in other ways these days, my days of coaching the Choppers are far behind me. Seems like they're doing just fine as they grow into the next generation of young leaders and professionals.

When I first started #CoachJeff seven years ago, I really had three objectives.

Learn a New Technology

Find an Outlet for my Interest in Writing

Provide Information about Coaching Youth Baseball to a New Generation

Along the way, the blog dipped into other topics, but it was always grounded in the grand ol’ game; America’s Pastime.

Today, I’ve told you the news about my plans for #CoachJeff. Over the next two days, I’ll give the blog a proper send-off. Tomorrow, I’ll tell you about some of my favorite posts and topics. And on New Year's Eve, I’ll close with thoughts about the game, my coaching experience, the blog and a look to the future.

See you then.

JG

[jeffdgary]

Warmth in the Candlelight

Later this evening, families will gather for holiday cheer; congregations will worship. Both family and religious gatherings will feel warmth in the candlelight that illumines home and hearth on this midwinter night.

Wherever you celebrate this Christmas Eve—and with whom you share the moment—I wish you health and happiness. I approach this occasion with great optimism.

Indeed, we are blessed.

My thoughts, recently, turned to a candlelight service of yesteryear and the glow of warmth that evening. It was 1981. I was a recent high school graduate and had just finished my first semester of college.

My grades were good. The experience was not overwhelming. I was in a very good place that night.

The same was true my friend, Wayne. A high school chum of mine, he had, also completed that initial fall term successfully. His church was hosting a candlelight service that Christmas Eve and he asked if I would like to join him at worship. I accepted his invitation.

I found the service meaningful and the music and scripture to be moving. As we exited the building after the final blessing, we agreed the night was too young to turn in (even though, I’m sure the hour recorded that Christmas Eve had passed into very early Christmas Morning).

In those days, the bedroom at my house was in the basement. It was secluded and quiet. It was a perfect place for us to continue the great conversation that began in the church parking lot.

I even had a couple comfy seats in the room to facilitate such camaraderie.

We sat there. Enjoyed a beverage. And we talked of the great possibilities that laid before us at that point in our lives. We imagined where it would all go and how the future would play out. We talked of our faith and of the majesty of the moment.

I’ve often reflected on that night many times over the years.

I’d like to think our teenage selves would be happy with the way things have played out for both of us. And, indeed, for Ed. He wasn’t present with us, in body, that evening but he was there in spirit. As our adult lives have evolved, each of us has earned a great deal of success. In my case, I’ve enjoyed so many rich experiences as a husband, father, volunteer and in my professional life. I’d like to think my dear friends would feel the same way about their successes.

And as we move forward toward the new year, I wish them both continued successes. On that night, some 37 Christmases ago, we were both the dreamers of great dreams. And those dreams came to pass.

Tonight, I will renew the tradition of candlelight worship at our home church. And I will send up prayers of praise and thanksgiving for all the many blessings bestowed upon me and my family.

I will also pray for my dear friends—those I’ve mentioned and others who still hold a special place in my heart—and for all who come to read these words on this night.

JG

[jeffdgary]

Top Ten Gary Stories of 2018 (Part Two)

Yesterday, we began the countdown of the Top 10 Gary Stories of 2018 with numbers 6-10. Today, we complete the feature with numbers 5-1.

5. Farragut Press — The Farragut Press celebrated its 30thanniversary in September and did a very nice feature that honored my work as the first editor of the paper. It was a privilege to have been able to serve in that role and I really appreciated the special treatment the current staff gave me as they prepared this year’s commemorative edition.

3A. Holly in Lille/Paul in South Florida — Holly finished the last half of her teaching assignment at Universite’ Lille 3 in late spring. She also did some significant regional travel as she completed her time in the EU. 

Meanwhile, in May, Paul finished an equally memorable experience at Florida Repertory Theater in Ft. Myers.

3B. Paul Returns to CCP/Holly at MC — As the year drew to a close, Paul returned to the Cumberland County Playhouse to reprise his role as the Rev. Mervin Oglethorpe in “A Sanders Family Christmas.” Holly worked as an adjunct French instructor at one of my favorite places, Maryville College.

2. Significant Years at Work for Jeff/Lisa — Both Lisa and I had major years at work. We completed numerous significant tasks and projects. I continue to have the privilege to manage a wonderful team. We both feel very blessed to have these positions and to continue to have the opportunity to make these contributions to our chosen fields.

1. European Vacation — As I noted in 2014, any time you have the opportunity to travel abroad, it has to be the highlight of the year. 

And, indeed, so it was for us in 2018 as we made the Atlantic Crossing for a second time. We experienced so many wonderful sights and sounds. It would be nearly impossible to list them all. One word: Amazing.

Honorable Mentions: 2018 shows, car purchase, new doctor, Ed trip, church campaign.

JG

Past Tops Tens

2017 Top Gary Stories Part One and Part Two

2016 Top Gary Stories Part One and Part Two

2015 Top Gary Stories Part One and Part Two

2014 Top Gary Stories Part One and Part Two

2013 Top Gary Stories Part One and Part Two

2012 Top Gary Stories Part One and Part Two

2011 Top Gary Stories Part One and Part Two

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Top 10 Gary Stories of 2018 (Part One)

A time-honored tradition of the blog: our two-part series to chronicle the top ten moments of the previous 12 months. For sure, 2018 has been a good and memorable year for our family and for the blog as well.

Enjoy, below, as we recap the Top 10 Gary Stories of 2018 (numbers 6-10)

10. Household Projects — Last year, we were doing some major renovations on the House of Gary. This year, our home projects were a little less ambitious. Inside, we were focused on decluttering, recycling and re-arranging. Outside, our ongoing project to upgrade the lawn began to (ahem) take root. Anyway, as one of my neighbors frequently says, “Ah, the joys of home ownership!”

9. Cat Antics — Before there was officially a “grumpy cat,” there was Roger. And he’s still grumpy. As he ages, he has become increasingly vocal. At the same time, he has become less and less likely to go outside. He has, on the other hand, displayed a love for Lisa’s Sam’s Club trips as they usually net him a new couple of boxes; one for clawing/one for sleeping.

8. Sports in 2018 — Sports, in 2018, was a bit of a mixed bag. The Titans surprised everyone with a playoff slot and a win in the wild card round of the 2017-18 playoffs. And the Braves were very exciting to watch in 2018 as they won the N.L. East Division title.

Memphis basketball struggled so much that a coaching change was needed. But, the arrival of Anfernee “Penny” Hardaway as coach has the community reinvigorated. Speaking of basketball, the UT Vols are highly ranked and poised for great things in 2019.

7. Blog Continuity — Anytime you keep doing something—anything—consistently for 7 years, that’s a record to be proud of. In September, #CoachJeff celebrated the touchdown and has enjoyed the last three months as an end zone dance.

6. Quebec Getaway — Lisa was scheduled for a business trip to Quebec City in May as she lays the groundwork for future partnerships between her department and organizations in that area. So, we tacked on a few days of nice, leisure travel to celebrate our anniversary. 

For us, it was a return to our honeymoon city. So, a fitting anniversary celebration, indeed.

Tomorrow: Numbers 5-1 (plus the honorable mentions).

JG

Past Tops Tens

2017 Top Gary Stories Part One and Part Two

2016 Top Gary Stories Part One and Part Two

2015 Top Gary Stories Part One and Part Two 

2014 Top Gary Stories Part One and Part Two 

2013 Top Gary Stories Part One and Part Two

2012 Top Gary Stories Part One and Part Two

2011 Top Gary Stories Part One and Part Two

[jeffdgary]

Misfits

I tend to get sentimental this time of the year. I’d like to think most of us do.

Of course, many people also struggle this time of year. They think of a lost love or multiple lost loved ones. Or maybe they pine for the days of yore. Other folks get lonely or they are just plain loners. In a sad sort of way, they remind me of those located on the island of misfit toys.,,you know from the holiday classic, Rudolph.

The other day, as I stared at our glistening tree, I thought of a few of these folks I have encountered on life’s journey. I think about how I met them, how I knew them and how they tended to have a hard time this time of year. I said a quick prayer.

I prayed for the fella who I once worked with. He lived here, in town, but he was from another state. He was disconnected from all his family (including his estranged daughter). Once, he mentioned he wouldn’t be celebrating much as he really didn’t have anyone to celebrate with.

With Lisa’s blessing, I invited him to join us that year for the family gathering we hosted. I like to think being with people that year might’ve cushioned the blow of being alone as the holiday arrived. I’m not sure about his current whereabouts. I hope he has reconnected with family or started a new one. Prayers rising for him this season.

And my prayers also rising for the young man—not so young now—who once showed up at our house on Christmas Eve carrying an extra large bottle of Pepto. Every now and then, he’d take a sip from the bottle.

His stomach was raw and his nerves shot because of an ill-timed break-up the night before. He thought they were in it for the long haul; she stuck it out just long enough to open all the presents—which she kept—before delivering the blow. And as he told the story, almost in poetic fashion, he’d punctuate every line with “Merry Effin’ Christmas, right?”

He didn’t say “effin’.”

Prayers rising for him this Christmas. I pray he was able to move beyond the sting of that break-up and find true love from someone not so interested in what was inside the shiny package but, rather, the good inside of him.

I was also thinking of my former high school friend who, some years later,   battled mental illness. 

The last time I saw him—when the ones were tiny tots—I could see in his wild-eyed look that something was amiss. He confided some thoughts that clearly betrayed severe mental illness. He added that he had chosen to stop taking medication because, after all, what good was that?

I counseled him that he needed to make an appointment with his physician right away and that he really needed to follow the doctor’s instructions. That was the last conversation I had with him as he skipped away into the darkness.

My prayers, for him, that he sought (and received) the help he needed and that he was able to get back on the path to healing.

Speaking of high school, I also thought of a young lady I met in social studies. She was sad because she had just moved to a new town, and a new school, halfway through her junior year of high school. 

She told me how much she missed her friends back home and how she feared she wouldn’t received a Christmas present from a friend that year.

I dipped into my piggy bank and purchased a gift for her, which I wrapped and took to school the day before the Christmas break. She smiled as she took the gift. And then she never spoke to me again. When we came back from the holidays, in fact, she made a point of making it quite clear she wouldn’t speak to me again.

I’ve often wondered if she was offended by the gift. Or was she playing a mean game to see if she could coersce a purchase out of a good-natured classmate? Maybe she just didn’t know what to say.

My prayers, for her, that whatever was driving her activity, she found happiness. And also the ability to receive a gift, any gift, and honor the gesture.

And for all the other misfits who grapple with difficult emotions this season, my prayers rising for hope and happiness as the big day moves ever closer.

JG

Editor’s Note - Please be sure to tune in tomorrow for our annual two-parter. Its the year-end wrap-up/Top 10 Stories of 2018 If you’re a long-time follower or the blog or a first timer here at #CoachJeff, it’s one of the highlights of the year. Don’t Miss it!

[jeffdgary]

Vols-Memphis Redux

As I’ve mentioned before, I was a huge fan of the Oakland Raiders and Dallas Cowboys when I was a little shaver. One of my ultimate dreams was that the two teams would meet in the Super Bowl.

Looking back on it, I’m not sure that would have been such a good idea. Who to root for? And when one of your favorite teams loses the big game, how does it leave you feeling? Fairly empty, I’d say.

Fast forward a great number of years and, there I was, in a sea of blue at Fedex Forum on Saturday morning. 

Who do you root for when your two favorite college basketball teams meet? And how do you feel when one of them—the home team in this case—comes up empty. Well, you feel...ahem. Empty.

I think I must be the only person in the state of Tennessee who doesn’t want to see the Tennessee Vols and Memphis Tigers play each other on the basketball court. Then again, I know I count myself as one of the few folks around who roots for both teams.

I’ve spent most of my life in East Tennessee; I spent formative years in West Tennessee. I have multiple degrees from the University of Tennessee; I wished for the opportunity to pursue higher education at Memphis. 

It’s a case of the school of my head facing the school of my heart. And on Saturday, the head beats the heart. 

On the plus side, it was a great crowd and a wonderful atmosphere. And it is always a treat for me to be back in Memphis. And for the Tigers, they are definitely a team with a bright future. I feel confident that Tiger legend and new coach, Anfernee “Penny” Hardaway will restore the team to its past glory.

As for the Vols, with its Top 5 ranking and veteran line-up, the current situation is quite bright. And it was clear, on Saturday, they were a polished team. The sky’s the limit.

So, what do you call a match-up like that, with your two favorite teams facing each other? A win-win.

JG

Editor’s Note - Be sure to tune in Wednesday and Thursday for our annual countdown of the Top 10 Gary Stories of 2018.

[jeffdgary]

Classic Unies

I’m always happy to see my teams ranked atop various Top 10 lists. So, when The Athletic placed the Braves at #9 in its ranking of all MLB uniforms, I gave it a thumbs up.

Honestly, in a list of classic unies, I’d rank the Bravos higher but as it is with modern payroll, it’s hard to compete with the big market ballclubs. The Cardinals at #5 represent another good choice. I’ve always thought the “birds on the bats” is crisp. It is also timeless.

That is an area in which the Braves didn’t have an advantage. Like so many other teams, they started experimenting with goofy, gaudy looks during the advent of color television. But, like so many other teams have done, when the 90s rolled around, they went back to the classic look they sported in the 50s and 60s.

I love the red and blue cap; the white unies with the script team name, the bright numbers on the back and the tomahawk across the front. Classic.

Not coincidentally, when the Bravos went back to that look, it seemed the entire professionalism of the team ramped up. 

We loved that motif so much that we emulated it in the youth baseball world when we named our team “The Choppers.” 

It’s true of other teams, too, who eschewed the old school style for the bright colors of the 70s and 80s only to go back to the future in the 90s and beyond. Mets. Pirates. Phillies and Twins come to mind. 

Those were the styles on the baseball cards I collected as.a kid; the ones that impacted my baseball psyche as I came of age.  I hope the trend continues.

But you’ve probably got me pegged when it comes to my opinions about America’s Pastime. There’s just two words to describe them: Old School. 

You caught me: like a slow baserunner trying to steal second. 

JG

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I Felt the Earth Move

My sleep patterns are all over the place the older I get. It’s not the least bit odd for me to need to get up at some point during the middle of the night.

But when nature called sometime just after 4 a.m. today, it was different altogether. I won’t say with 100% accuracy that it was the magnitude 4.4 earthquake that woke me up. But, to be sure, I felt the earth move (under my…bed?).

Holly confirmed it. She, too, was shaken and awakened at 4:17 a.m. It’s always about the number 17 at our house…

Maybe it was the second temblor near Decatur that rose me from my slumber. Whatever the case, for all intents and purposes, the night’s sleep was over at that point. We’re more than a few miles away from Meigs County, but it seems like many people throughout the Southeast felt the earthquake.

I realize that, in other parts of the world, earthquakes are a serious business. Fortunately for those of us in East TN, it seems, there weren’t any reports of damage or injuries today. And that’s a very good thing.

This morning’s event sent my mind thinking of other times I felt a big shake (metaphorically or otherwise). And I’m not talking about creamy, chilly, chocolate confections.

Sandlot Football Growing up, we played tackle football (sans pads) in any vacant lot we could find. In one particularly physical game, I remember being tackled into a tree and, later, into the street. In another game some months later, I remember someone went low in tackling me and flipped me all the way around. Needless to say, I felt a bit woozy when I stood up after hitting the ground.

Big ol’ Jet Airliner Once I was driving by the local airport and was not fully aware of my surroundings. Just then, the shadow eclipsed my car just as the rumble flew over. I realize it is an optical illusion, but it felt like that big ol’ jet airliner was low enough as it passed over my Jeep® that I could have reached out and high-fived the pilots going by. It wasn’t ACTUALLY the case, but let’s just say I was flustered and my vehicle was fluttering.

First Kiss; Young Love As a teen, that first kiss moment is a doozy. I remember mine (after the high school Christmas dance my sophomore year).

And falling in love for the first time really knocks you sideways, too. In my mind’s eye there’s a note for “life-changing event” attached to both events.  

You might also say that I was unconscious after that first kiss. But then again, I was unconscious this morning at 4:16. Then, the clock ticked, a new minute came, the ground rumbled.

And like 1,642 times before it, a blog post was born.

JG

[jeffdgary]

Toyland Toyland

Throughout the years, I always felt like Santa hit a home run with our Christmas morning visits. Honestly, I can’t remember any year I felt underwhelmed or when I longed for any specific toy, gadget or clothing item.

I hope, and believe, my sister would say the same.

Moving to our generation as young parents, I believe Holly and Paul would equally opine that Santa checked all the key boxes.

In a way, I’m glad our parenting years fell when they did. I can’t imagine the challenges parents—and Santa—face during this era when gadgets have exploded, the crush of Black Friday sales and cyber Monday (and local Saturday…or small business Saturday) has extended the holiday shopping season (and expanded the expected budget).

In addition to Santa, you also have Grandma and Grandpa (and Nana and PawPaw) and well-meaning Aunt Fran and always a card, Uncle Mortie, all wanting to make a splash. Indeed, I would imagine the Gen X or Millennial parent is absolutely inundated with toys when the holiday season fades into winter.

The key question is, how many toys (and gadgets) would really hold the attention of Little Janey or Little Johnny? 

When Toyland becomes an unorganized mess and when the kiddos run the risk of being spoiled, how do the parents step in to make sense of all of it. An NPR report from last year’s holiday season outlined examples of how Mom and Dad can bring some moderation to Christmas morning.

At the end of the day, isn’t the old message still true today? Money can’t buy you love? Isn’t it also true that less is more?

Experiences, moderation and good ol’ common sense can be the key. And even though the Yahoo article suggests “saving for the future” and the need for a “new pair of shoes,” which might not meet Fran’s and Mortie’s desire for the big splash, I can wholeheartedly agree that those suggestions are gold.

Take them to a ballgame, movie, concert or show. Stuff a couple saving bonds in the stocking. Teach them a craft, a skill or tell them stories from yesteryear.

Or maybe offer Mom and Dad that you’d happy to come over and help re-organize the playroom for Little Janey and Little Johnny after they get tired of playing with this year’s shiny new thing.

JG

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Making the Playoffs

After the stats of the Sunday Night Football game were counted, a fact became mathematically evident: one of my teams is going to be making the fantasy football playoffs.

Beginning with the first year I played fantasy football in the 90s, I have managed a team to the fantasy football playoffs every year. And a few times along the way, my team has won the title.

I’ll admit, though. It was a lot more fun (and more challenging) when I was in a league with local guys; fantasy owners that I knew and interacted with.

Now, when I play on one of those free online leagues, it isn’t as fun at all. 

But, still, winning is better than losing, right?

This team’s march to the playoffs was different than some. Normally, I like to build the team around a strong quarterback that piles up the stats. But, for some reason, the other owners in this league must’ve had the same idea.

Every time I was about to select a QB in the draft, someone else nabbed him. So, I kept putting off and putting off the quarterback pick. Eventually, I took one QB that was rated the last one in the middle tier. So, in other words, I was about to go into the range of lesser-performing players and big-time question marks.

Later, I picked up a player (weeks into the season) who was scoring a lot of points out of the blue. Then, he got benched and I picked up another QB who was doing well. Then, he got hurt and is out for the season, so I picked up the first guy, again, after he regained his starting job. Then, he got benched again.

So, I dropped him, as well as the original draftee, and picked up two more. Those are the guys I’m riding with now (and to the finish line - whenever that is).

The playoffs begin next week. I have no idea how this team will do. But, they’re in the mix. And this time of year, that’s all you can ask for.

JG

[jeffdgary]

The Gift(s) That Keep Giving

As we get ever-closer to Christmas Day, we’ll renew that annual tradition of gift-giving.

When done correctly, the giving of a Christmas gift (or one for anniversary, birthday, Hanukkah or other occasion) is personal and special. Ideally, the gift-giver has selected an item with the receiver in mind; a token of their esteem.

When done incorrectly, well…you know.

USA Today, recently, published a feature guiding us on 10 of the worst gift ideas. And while not all of these are duds, some are. And when the act of gift-giving devolves into a check-the-box sort of practice, then, well you really are left wondering “what’s the point?”

From my personal experience, here are some examples.

I’ll Take 10 of Those and I Need 8 of These and… I knew someone, once, who seemed to do Christmas shopping in bulk. You just had the feeling the shopper was telling the clerk “I’ll take 10 of those and I need 8 of these, and…” In other words, very unfeeling.

The gifts you received had the personal touch you might associate with getting a pack of baseball cards, opening it, and giving everyone a card. Or maybe a deck of playing cards is a better example. Here, have this “4 of hearts.” Play it in good health! It’s the gift that keeps giving.

Gift Cards The USA Today feature mentions gift cards. This is a case of could be good/could be bad. I understand the convenience of sending a gift card to someone far away. Or if you, as a gift giver have racked your brain and are just absolutely stumped.

But when you turn in your Christmas list and say “I’d like a gift card for (insert name of vendor)” isn’t that kind of like just saying “Give me a $20 bill, please!?”

Dirty Santa I’ve participated in a few of these give a gift/steal a gift sort of games (never as a choice) and I saw some real doozies in my time. I’m talking hurt feelings. I’m talking “I’ll show you.”

I think that really kind of defeats the purpose, doesn’t it? Or put another way, it kind of flies in the face of the meaning of giving a gift.

For those who have never played, it goes something like this.

Everyone brings a gift

You go around the circle and, in order, you get to pick a gift from under the tree.

Then, the next person can either pick a gift from under the tree OR steal the one you have.

Clearly, the person who chooses last is in the catbird seat, as they can have their pick of any item.

I developed a very “meh” strategy to playing this game. I tried to select something that I wouldn’t mind owning (once, I picked a glass Christmas tree filled with M & Ms) but something that wouldn’t be coveted.

In every case, I have been inoculated from “the steal”; insulate from the cold, cruel reality of the game.

Some folks say that isn’t within the spirit of the game itself. My answer is, well, I think the game itself isn’t really within the spirit.

In any case, as #CoachJeff winds toward the holidays and the end of this year, here’s a wish that your stocking is filled with goodies and the season is filled with joy.

JG

[jeffdgary]

State Funeral

I’ve always thought the USA is really good at certain things. We’re stellar at State Funerals.

Just the right amount of protocol, pomp and patriotism. To me, they always feel tastefully done.

Maybe it strikes me that way because there have been a number of them in my lifetime. I remember, as a kid, watching the televised ceremonies associated with the deaths of Presidents Truman, Eisenhower and Johnson. And, as an adult, Nixon, Ford and Reagan. I remember the events associated with Reagan seemed to have the perfect touch – a solumn tribute coupled with a bit of understated patriotism.

Nothing can make the dignity of the JFK funeral. Though I was just an infant, the images are indelibly etched into our national psyche. And many of us saw them again late last month with the 55thanniversary of his assassination.

I read the news coverage of the state funeral of President Bush and, of course, saw the highlights. Solumn. Dignified. Appropriate. Like the man himself. The National Cathedral is such a beautiful church and a true national treasure.

I remember how awe-inspiring it was to see it, in person, during our family vacation in 2005. 

That was not long after President Reagan’s state funeral. And the perfect place for today’s service.

My reflections of President Bush, as I wrote in 2012 (and re-blogged upon learning of his passing last Friday) are personal. I feel every American should have the opportunity to meet a President in person (though I know that is rare and I feel very blessed to have had that opportunity in 1989). True patriot; gracious gentleman. Hero.

RIP Mr. President.

JG

[jeffdgary]

Three Weeks to Christmas

Lisa and I have this ongoing conversation. I’ll say, “Can you believe it is x (days, weeks, months) until (insert name of occasion)?” She’ll often reply with surprise or occasionally “I’m not ready for that.”

In any case, the takeaway for us both is how fast the time goes by.

So here we are. It’s three weeks to Christmas and it hardly seems possible. That’s right, three more weeks until the jolly ol’ elf makes his annual sleigh ride.

Weren’t we just celebrating the 4th of July. Oh, that’s right. Bad example, we were travelling that day. Substitute: weren’t we just watching the MLB All Star Game?

As I so often do, I digress.

Moving ever closer to the end of the year, the thrill of the moment and the cascade of memories from the days of yore, I took a few moments over the weekend to think about what I’m really wishing for this holiday season.

Health and Happiness Because of the nature of their work, either Lisa or Holly has been sick the last couple of years. I’m really wishing for a healthy Christmas for all of us. There was an ill-timed case of the flu in the extended family last year that really put a damper on things. So, I’m thankful for hand sanitizer (and general hygiene) as well as antibiotics (and antivirals). And I’m hopeful we’re all healthy this season.

Bad News Takes a Holiday Seems like there was a run, for a few years, when there was some awful tragedy that fell during the season. I’m praying there isn’t such an occurrence this year.

No Drama I’m hoping everyone is merry, upbeat and on their best behavior. I’ve really got my fingers crossed that there is no drama this year. Thanksgiving went well. Here’s hoping for the Trifecta!

Between now and then, there will be church services and holiday gatherings. We’ll enjoy tasty treats and wonderful music. The neighborhoods and streets will be adorned by festive lights and colorful décor. What a wonderful time of year it is.

I guess that is my ultimate wish. Nothing to get in the way of a full-out enjoyment of what’s to come.

And while I’m offering up prayers, here’s one more: for peace and prosperity and untold blessings for all in the new year.

JG

[jeffdgary]

Cat Under the Tree

Why is it such a universal concept? When you deck the halls for the holiday season, it’s not long at all before you have a cat under the tree.

When we did our Christmas decoration last weekend, Roger soon found his spot under the big tree in the front room. And just a few nights later, he was batting at something under the sports tree. Eventually, he settled down after determining the tree skirt was really no threat at all.

Indeed, cat lovers far and wide will post pix of little Fluffy or Morris or Garfield. The scenario is always the same. Tree is trimmed and lights are shining. Below the faux spruce, you’ll find a feline. I noted that my sister had a similar pic up not long after my first Roger sighting.

The build-up to this photo op was not so bucolic. Anytime there is hubbub, Roger is naturally suspicious. I think there is something about our family vacations that is implanted somewhere back in his memory bank. When we are loading up for a trip, there is always a flurry of activity. And that activity includes moving around big containers.

After the containers move, we disappear for a few days.

In any case, that is the scenario I’ve worked out in my mind. Maybe it’s not so complicated. Perhaps he just doesn’t like all the noise. Or change.

Thus, when we were doing our decorating last weekend, he seemed a bit on edge.

That made his long winter’s nap all the more soothing, I’m sure. “Oh, it’s just this,” he discovered. “That activity always translates to a couple extra prime catnap spots for a few weeks.”

And so he settled in.

That is, of course, until the packages begin to arrive and it becomes “shared space.”

From there, the holidays will bring visitors (not so good) and treats (very good). There will also be more time with us at home (very very good: for ingres and egres, extra food, and giving “the pets,” as Holly calls it). So, I’d wager he sees it as a net gain.

Until, of course, we repeat the process in reverse.

More noise. More hubbub. And the end result is the house returns to ordinary time and the long, cold winter sets in.

JG

[jeffdgary]

In Honor of President Bush

Editor’s Note - In honor of our 41st President, George HW Bush, this morning, I am re-posting an edition of #CoachJeff that I wrote in June 2012. The news of the former President’s death at the age of 94 was announced late yesterday.

Today is the 88th birthday of our nation’s 41st President, George Herbert Walker Bush. I’d like to take this opportunity to say “Happy Birthday Mr. President.” Talk about an American hero.

I’ve always felt a special connection to President Bush (#41) since the day, in 1989, that I met him in the White House. Before you get the idea that I was some special somebody; a big donor with a fancy connection, just toss that one out. It was simply a case of me being in the right place at the right time (kind of like when Holly & Paul met Bono last year on the streets of Nashville just before the U2 concert).

Lisa and I (and also my sister, Lisa) were taking the general White House tour. It was not even the ‘special’ one you could get back then through your Senator or Congressman. As an aside, I think you have arrange all White House tours that way  now.

Anyway, we had gone through the 10 or so public rooms and were getting ready to leave when one of the door guards said to a group of us “He’s coming down the stairs.” Of course, in this case, there is no doubt who he meant as “HE.”

Just a moment later, down the stairs came a group of dignitaries – as I recall, the President was entertaining a Catholic Cardinal that day along with some other church officials. He looked over at the group of us gawking by the velvet rope and, then, he broke from the group and rushed over to greet us.

Secret servicemen began scrambling, as you might imagine.

I have always thought, to myself, “He didn’t have to do that.” It was very nice of him to take time out of a very busy schedule to interact with a group of tourists. But that is just what he did.

As he talked to us, he admired the place: “What a wonderful house this is!”

Then, he began shaking hands and asking us all where we were from. I’ll never forget when he shook hands with the guy next to me who identified his hometown as Cincinnati. The President replied (with a nod of the head, and you can imagine this next line delivered in the all-too-familiar Bush cadence.

“Ah, Cincinnati. They’ve got good chili down there!”

Some things always stick with you.

One thing that has always stuck with me is how friendly he was to all of us. But, in just a fleeting instant, the moment passed. “Gotta get back to work,” he told us, as he went on his way.

From that moment on, I felt a special connection to him. During the 1992 election, when everyone talked about passing a torch from generation to generaion, I balked. The World War II generation (“The Greatest Generation”) did so much to help our country through so many difficult times.

I was not ready for the torch to be passed.

But, history marches on. The torch was passed and that nice man who I had shook hands with in the White House three years earlier was pushed out of office. But he handled that crushing defeat with tremendous grace and dignity. I marveled, later, at how he and his former opponent (#42, ol’ Bill Clinton) became friends and teamed up to lead the relief efforts in the wake of the earthquakes in Haiti and the tsunami in South East Asia.

President Bush was a leader before he was President then he became President. And he has served as a leader as a former President. As I said earlier, he’s an American hero.

There was a nice tribute to President Bush, from his granddaughter, on the Today Show this morning. You can view the clip by clicking the link below. Also, HBO has produced a documentary about President Bush that will begin airing this Thursday.

I can’t wait to check it out.

JG