It makes me insane how Yuu reacts to Ijuuin's affection and consideration towards him.
I: I'm glad.
I: It makes me very happy that you said that. (that Yuu wanted his rematch in bed)
I: I'll work hard too, in order to make you feel good, Yanase-kun.
Y: No, you don't have to do anything, Sensei.
Y: I just thought about that by my own/without asking you, so...
I: Yanase-kun.
I: You should accept a little more the fact that I love you. (he actually says something like "you're loved by me" but that wording is kinda weird, methinks)
I: Okay?
See?
Doing things like that
He blocks my escape routes.
Like, first time doing penetrative sex wasn't all pleasurable, but Yuu puts all the responsibility on himself and says that Ijuuin shouldn't do anything. While Yuu's idolization may be at play here, I think that Yuu still doesn't think that he's someone suitable for Ijuuin. (Which reminds me of the Sentiment chapter where Ijuuin goes to Yuu's house, and Yuu was about to break up with him and explicitly told him that there must be someone more suitable for him)
I've already talked about Yuu's self-esteem as a professional here, but is really interesting (and kinda sad ngl) how he actually has a low self-esteem in general. Like, this though bubble he has on The ☆ Kan exhibition, after thinking how amazing Ijuuin is for being able to reunite so many fans that genuinely love him.
... That's precisely why I don't understand why someone like him loves me.
A lot of time has passed, but Yuu realizing that he isn't capable of making interesting stories and giving up on becoming a mangaka must have really deal a blow in his confidence and self-esteem, even to this day (´・ω・｀) Like, in a way, he doesn't think that he deserves being loved by Ijuuin, because he's so awesome, so why would he end up falling in love with him?
Yeah, Yuu still idealizes Ijuuin, but can we blame him? Like, I think it's not far fetched to think that Yuu started drawing because of The ☆ Kan. In a way, Yuu wouldn't be the person he is today if it weren't for Ijuuin.
Which! Makes me love Ijuuin's response even more. Yuu tries to dismiss Ijuuin by telling him that he doesn't need to do anything, because this is something that he decided on his own, but Ijuuin tells him that he should accept (a little more) the fact that he loves him, meaning that he wants to try his best to make Yuu feel good too, because he loves him. He wants to do things for Yuu too and Yuu should let him, because those actions are born from Ijuuin's love towards Yuu.
Also, Yuu thinking that when Ijuuin says things like that, he blocks his escape routes makes me insane. Like, Ijuuin tells him that he wants to make him feel good too, because he loves and he should accept that fact and Yuu feels kinda threatened? I think that kind of response (from Yuu) comes from the fact that he's kinda scared of facing his feelings for Ijuuin, because they're more deep than he likes to admit. Like, he just isn't ready to be honest with himself and to face the fact that this relationship isn't as casual as it was when Ijuuin first proposed it.
Bonus of Yuu panicking about the fact he's dating Ijuuin✨
Is relatively common to hear stories about female assistants dating their mangakas or marrying them.
If I think it's the same as that, I understand that it isn't something specially weird.
BUT!!!
Is it really fine?!
This is the author of The ☆ Kan, the best super popular mangaka in all the world!
Is it fine for someone like him to date me?
Yeah, idealization comes into play, but also the fact that Yuu is Yuu plays a big role in his thoughts. Like, is it okay for him to date someone as awesome as Ijuuin?? You make me insane Yuu Yanase (´；ω；｀)♡
(This happens after Yuu tells Ijuuin that he saw him talking to Misaki)
Y:... Why are you making such a happy face...?
I: Well, that's obvious, isn't it?*
I: Is there a guy who wouldn't get happy when the person they like gets cutely jealous?
* An explanation about the expression that Ijuuin used ("そりゃそうでしょ) here
I really love the fact that Ijuuin used "the person they like" (好きな子) instead of "lover" (恋人), because it puts more focus on his feelings for Yuu than the relationship they have. The fact that they're lover may not totally dawn on Yuu at this point, so Ijuuin saying that he's the person he likes is more reassuring, in my opinion.
(side-note about this): The front page of the previous Sentiment chapter, (where Ijuuin goes to Yuu's house (why the fuck they don't have numbered acts???!)) in the Emerald magazine had the following text, which was removed for the vol. release (´；ω；｀)
憧れ以上で、恋人未満。
With admiration and more, less than a lover.
ちょっと微妙な、僕らの距離。
Our distance it's a little subtle/delicate.
(random note): It's kinda funny how the pronoun used here is 僕(ら) (boku(ra)) when I don't recall neither Ijuuin or Yuu using that. As far as I remember they always use 俺 (ore). However, since the text mentions admiration, it must be from Yuu's PoV.
Going back to the panel in question, I really love how Ijuuin worded his response. Given how, in the previous Sentiment chapter, Yuu was about to break up with Ijuuin, since, before he knows it, he starts having disgusting thoughts. In that case, being jealous from Chiaki.
So Ijuuin telling him that is obvious why he's making such a happy face, and that there's no one who wouldn't react the way he does in that situation, reassures Yuu that this is a completely normal and natural situation. It's not just Ijuuin, anyone would be overjoyed if they loved Yuu. So he shouldn't feel ashamed or disgusted by his actions and feelings. In fact, they're more than welcome!
Also! I really love how Ijuuin also reassures Yuu that what he's feeling/doing isn't disgust at all. He says that he got "cutely jealous" (*´ω｀*) So in a way, he's telling him that he's adorable, not disgusting.
Been thinking about how Ijuuin likes to cup Yuu's face when he kisses him. It started after Ijuuin though that Yuu pushed him away when he kissed him and he thought that maybe he was startled since it was so sudden 😅 (this doesn't apply to when they're doing it, because Ijuuin's hands are somewhere else wjqkkskf 🤭💕)
feat. Ijuuin making Yuu cup his face and grabbing his chin
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