h
Kiana Khansmith
$LAYYYTER
roma★
NASA
wallacepolsom
styofa doing anything
almost home
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cherry valley forever
Janaina Medeiros
Peter Solarz
❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
Today's Document
YOU ARE THE REASON
Product Placement
Cosimo Galluzzi
★
No title available
One Nice Bug Per Day
seen from Austria
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seen from Malaysia
seen from South Africa
seen from Singapore
seen from Germany
seen from Iraq
seen from Iraq
seen from Hungary
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seen from United States
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@jessherreraphoto
Since the night before last, the flow of things has been off. Some weird shift. Something feels wrong in general, nothing in particular. I can only describe it as “the flow of things”. I hope that either I learn something from it or that it passes soon.
Feeling the distance today.
I always forget how much sexy sexual things there are on tumblr. Even photos of just like a taxi or a strand of pearls is loaded with all this sexual subtext and everything is just so sensual. And all the erotica is like soft lit black and white stockings and coffee and chunky sweaters with half-exposed nipples and forest fellatio in slow motion where all the shadows aren’t quite black, but a washed out romantic slate gray. I always feel tempted to order thigh high socks every damn time I scroll through tumblr but like FOR WHAT?! Do I really wanna do that self love thing again? Go through the process AGAIN of trying to feel ~understated sexy~? Ugh...much work. Still a consideration though.
Looked at old IG posts and actually had a real visceral reaction that wasn’t crying. I felt like I wanted to vomit. Clicked out immediately.
Reading and taking reading seriously starts TODAY.
How do I ~CHANGE~ my life?
I’m starting to hate the weekends. So lonely.
Next time I’ll take a real camera to work.
click through to detail
click a couple times for detail
click for detail. scans are huge files so the beauty is in the details.
okay so it’s not that digital photography doesn’t suit me. it’s just a medium. it’s given me many opportunities to create and figure things out while creating. i’m not ruling it out of my creative repertoire. i just feel like right now i want more complex outlets. but i guess it would be good to just shoot as a therapy thing...it’s better for me than scrolling on instagram for hours.
I think something I’ve learned about myself is that in order to get out that creative itch in me, I need to do more than just shoot. I’m a very hands-on type of person and relish in a moment of experimentation. I think that’s why I’ve taken on creating resin keychains. I always learn something new, my hands are pretty dirty when I’m done, and it’s chemical process-based. I think I like doing things that produce something creative but is based in science. Is that most things? I’m not sure. But when pouring resin and seeing how it reacts to alcohol or other chemicals versus drawing with a pencil and paper, the resin process feels much more scientific. Scanography and chemical photography feels more scientific than digital photography. I guess it’s just how you treat your medium? I don’t know if you can quantify how scientific something is because everything is science. ANYWAYS. I just feel like digital photography isn’t experimental enough for me. And I’m not really one to make grand statements in my work that I can experiment with. I don’t know anything. How can I capture an idea when I know that I don’t know anything. I hardly believe in anything. I mean I have a vey well calibrated moral compass and I know what I value, but I’m not really into expressing those things in images. I have a lot of interests and so many topics excite or concern me...but it’s not a visual thing for me. Why does visual art need to be a part of my life and what do I hope to get out of it? This is a question I haven’t ever asked myself. Or maybe I used to just know the answer and never HAD to ask myself. I guess I just do it because I don’t feel like myself if I don’t.
It’s stupid that there is a word for love, as if it’s something that can be defined. Love should be titled or recognized with a gesture or something dynamic. Love is everything and nothing at once. I don’t know what love is, but I know that I feel it sometimes. But I can’t really say what that feeling is. Sometimes I think that people should pursue comfort more than they should pursue love. And yet here I am still being a patron of it. It gets me every time. His eyes.
I'm constantly hoping that all of these emotions that flow through me, all of my confusion and sadness and frustration, will manifest itself into creativity. Making sense of the world and relationships with all of the people around me cannot be done through just conversation and self-reflection *ahem*crying alone in bed*ahem*. I need a true outlet for this state of mind, yet my state has created nothing but fog.
I had to shoot an image for a literature submission for dumdumzine.com. I’ve had the assignment for weeks and i’ve been waaaaay overdue. one of the editors sent me a friendly reminder today while i was at work, and not knowing what to do, i grabbed the most interesting (and hopefully most representatively relevant to the prose) and shot it while on the clock. not professional at all, but i got it done and the images are lucious.
Shot for DUM DUM Zine