:3

[scramratz]

I think people would be less suicidal if they were allowed to talk about being suicidal without risk of being sent to the Torture Dungeon

[cpericardium]

hey everyone "I" have something to show "you"

[cpericardium]

[cpericardium]

[tekunoraizu]

FUCKKKKKKK what if something bad happened and I forgot to worry about it

[iahtruong]

[crabanarchy]

I can tell my evil advisor has been feeling down lately so I've been pretending to take big sips from his cursed chalice and then roaming the palace grounds groaning and clutching my abdomen. Lowkey I know it's deceptive but I can tell it's really cheering him up. I heard him evilly cackle for the first time in weeks. WIBTA if I keep doing this

[cecil-apologist-deactivated2024]

does anyone know if we have transmasc and transfem love and friendship today

[damazcuz]

We do. And tomorrow and the next day and every day forever and ever and ever too. :)

[cecil-apologist-deactivated2024]

a long time ago i was struggling with being transmasc because i felt like i was betraying womanhood somehow. then one of my best friends came out as a trans woman and i realised "ah... there will always be so many beautiful women in the world, so it's okay that i'm not one of them". what i'm trying to say is you need to love each other or there's no point to any of this

[risenfromthebog]

in a reversal of this. when i came out as transfem i was almost dissapointed because i spent so long trying to be a truly good man. i was raised with a lot of shitty guys so i tried to be the most pro-feminist comfortable dude i could be for the women around me. when my egg cracked, i almost felt this feeling of "shit, are the only men who think like this secretly women inside?" and it feels nice to see that proven so utterly and completely wrong by the trans men i know in my life. i love seeing people take on the masculinity i hated and do amazing shit with it, god bless trans dudes

[full-of-sharp-teeth]

me: *has auditory processing disorder*

dad: can you pick up the extension cord by the ▒▒▒▒▒

me: what

dad: can you pick up the extension cord

me: by the what?

dad: [LOUD DRAMATIC SIGH] by the BENCH

my brain: we should kill that guy

[ceruleanheaven]

how to become good at everything no practice no effort no motivation no passion no talent fast free

[hellenhighwater]

Gonna get myself a fun little surprise I guess

[hellenhighwater]

This is better than I'd ever hoped for, I bet a rat could kill you with that thing by firing a laser back in time and electrocuting your grandfather

Just look at this thing

[hellenhighwater]

The rat gun is hereeeeee!

[hellenhighwater]

This is getting notes again so I will admit that "rat gun" was an autocorrect error and it was supposed to be "ray gun."

But it'll always be a rat gun to me.

[hellenhighwater]

The most expensive thing in these pictures was the cat, and he was $60.

[hellenhighwater]

I'll be honest--I forgot that the pump organ desk/bar was visible in the background, and it was NOT under $60.

It was actually $75.

The chairs, however, were paid for in human life. I inherited them; they were originally my great grandmother's. But they're not particularly rare-- you can find these exact chairs without a lot of effort, in reasonable shape, for not that much money. They made a lot of them.

[theworsethingsgettheharderifight]

your gazelle has a pearl choker

[hellenhighwater]

That's Hadrian. He's a bush buck and he loves fashion.

[hellenhighwater]

Hi you asked this question and I immediately went to the pottery studio to make a calcifer to put in my woodstove.

Will update if he survives the kiln.

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

i am still on tenterhooks vis a vis calcifer 🥺🥺🥺

[hellenhighwater]

I just brought him home from the pottery studio and wired him for light. He lives!!!!!

[thebisexualwreckoning]

OP just wondering do you like have the closet to Narnia tucked in there somewhere?

[hellenhighwater]

Dude, c'mon, these things take time.

Give me a couple hours.

[hellenhighwater]

Okay!! We have doordrobe! It's not quite done but after nearly turning myself into an hellpancake while carrying this in from the garage to the house, I feel like I should call it a night.

Right now it's not going into a secret room (but the Angel of Death (And WiFi) behind it does have a secret compartment for my router? Does that count) but Malice and Vice are still exploring it like it's a whole new world.

The House of Horrors continues to be...well, exactly what it is.

[hellenhighwater]

Oh, no, all radioactive materials go in The Box.

[copp3rtop]

please explain. Do you actually have a lead lined box for radioactive objects, or are you just talking about the router behind the painting?

[hellenhighwater]

The Box.

[hellenhighwater]

Not people's teeth, no.

[chaoticgremlinmakingart]

Holy shit. This just keeps getting better and better. Absolutely marvelous house. What other treasures do you have in that house?

[hellenhighwater]

I recently got some very silly dishes and a telescope!

[hellenhighwater]

All of these accusations of witchcraft! As if the vibe in this house could be any more clearly Artificer.

[ardentmystacina]

#every time op posts a picture of her house I get heart eyes

[ravioliet]

god's weakest soldier is scrolling tumblr instead of being productive or participating in any of their hobbies

[milanesa42]

“The employees need a larger salary” “hmmmm large celery”

[gothdolphin-deactivated20190409]

me: how do churches deal with gluten at communion

first response on a catholic forum:

[hvlthgxth-deactivated20241124]

The Roman Catholic church is the only Christian faith with any mettle.

[hvlthgxth-deactivated20241124]

It’s not bread. It’s Jesus, dipshit. Next question.

[regrettablyjake]

It’s jesus, but also jesus’ body activates Celiac’s

[baddywronglegs]

Around 1% of Catholics are severely allergic to Jesus

[queer-here-and-in-fear]

i love how they arent even arguing that someone with celiacs should just eat the bread. they acknowledge they shouldnt! they just also feel the need to state it Is jesus, and even if jesus doesnt contain gluten, he sure damn acts like it. for some reason

[jacksdumpster]

Lapislazuli

[valtsv]

it would be fun if an angel and a vampire were friends i think

[valtsv]

vampire: ugh, you mortals simply can't comprehend the timescale i live on. i've watched your empires rise and fall, your cities crumble to dust. i find your short little lives amusing at best. i -

angel: HI, I HAVE BEEN ALIVE SINCE THE DAWN OF TIME AND I NOTICED YOU ARE ALSO SOMEWHAT OLD?

vampire: ...sure. hey what was the dawn of time like?

angel: PRETTY BORING ACTUALLY. NOTHING ELSE EXISTED YET.

vampire: oh, man, i feel you. i slept through, like, the entire 14th century it was so boring. everyone was dying of plague and shit anyway so i didn't miss much.

[valtsv]

vampire: hey i am outside your apartment

angel: YOU'VE JUST BEEN STANDING THERE? FOR HOW LONG?

vampire: uhhhhhhh a mere speck in comparison to our immortal lives so don't worry about it honestly. i need you to invite me in though.

angel: OF COURSE, I'M SO SORRY. PLEASE COME IN.

vampire: *steps over the threshold and immediately starts hissing and coughing like a cat with a bad hairball*

angel: OH, I'M SO SORRY. MY APARTMENT IS CONSIDERED HOLY GROUND BECAUSE I LIVE IN IT. I SHOULD HAVE WARNED YOU.

vampire: *coughing* it's fine. do you - *cough* *wheeze* what are your thoughts on chinese? i know a great place just a couple of blocks from here

[valtsv]

everyone replying to this with "and they were lovers"? target audience

[bisexual-engineer-girl]

can the vampire take Benadryl to be in the angel's house

[froggyjuumps]

they kissed!

[jessiemcdona]

lesbina?

[jessiemcdona]

do you want to talk about plants

…maybe

[plushtive]

when the hyperfixations hyperfixate

[jessiemcdona]

alternatively just start talking