For @miyuki4s, post-canon wangxian, LWJ pov. Didn’t quite mean for this to come out as angsty as it did, but here we are.
Sometimes Lan Wangji wakes in the night terrified that he’s alone in his bed. The dream slips away, as it always does, and Lan Wangji does not try to hold it. The memories are bad enough; he does not care to relive them.
He has new memories now, to overlay the old: Wei Wuxian laughing at him from across the table, Wei Wuxian leaning into him as moonlight spills into the jingshi, Wei Wuxian warm and gasping underneath Lan Wangji’s hands and mouth. Wei Wuxian, in a new body but always irrepressibly himself, warm and teasing by turns but and alive and here.
Unless - unless he isn’t. Perhaps what Lan Wangji remembers is the dream, a cruel spinning out of his deepest wishes; perhaps if he looks over, the space he remembers leaving will be empty and unslept in.
Lan Wangji takes a deep breath, counts to three, and looks over.
No. It can’t be. Lan Wangji sits bolt upright, putting a frantic hand out to the empty bedclothes. Surely he hadn’t imagined it all, surely the world wouldn’t be so cruel as to take Wei Wuxian from him again -
But Lan Wangji knows exactly how cruel the world can be.
His throat is closing up and his hand fists in the bedclothes as the door to the bedroom slides open, spilling in cool moonlight and the shadow of -
“What, can’t sleep without me?” Wei Wuxian’s voice is light with amusement as he shuts the door behind him. “I only left for a few minutes, Lan Zhan, so needy -”
His voice cuts off as he turns back from the door. Lan Wangji doesn’t know what his face is doing but Wei Wuxian’s own changes abruptly, sliding from teasing to confused to a flash of fierceness before Lan Wangji’s arms are suddenly full of Wei Wuxian. Lan Wangji holds on desperately, burying his face in Wei Wuxian’s neck.
“Wei Ying,” he says, and he can hear the strain in it.
“I’m here,” Wei Wuxian says fiercely. “I’m here and I’m not leaving, Lan Zhan.”
Lan Wangji chokes back a sound that wants to be a sob, squeezing his eyes shut as a cool hand strokes through his hair.
“Not leaving,” Wei Wuxian murmurs, and Lan Wangji clings to that, to him, to the promise in his voice. “Not for anything. Not ever again.”
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