JJ & RaeRae Get Dates

Two ladies (and Tom) teach you all about dates.

[jjandraerae-blog]

At Nevin's

Very Drunk Man: (Takes bottle of malt vinegar from JJ and RaeRae's table) Whose beer is this?

JJ: Yours.

Very Drunk Man: (Realizes his mistake. Laughs maniacally)

(Later. RaeRae is laughing)

Very Drunk Man: (to JJ) I like your laugh.

JJ: I didn't laugh. She laughed.

Very Drunk Man: (to RaeRae) I like your laugh. It's goofy, but I like it.

(Later)

Very Drunk Man: (Feels JJ and RaeRae's hair) I like your hair. I like hers, too.

JJ: Are we in a hair competition?

Very Drunk Man: Yeah, it's a competition. (Laughs maniacally. Starts talking about wife)

[jjandraerae-blog]

JJ's questions about RaeRae's next date

JJ: What's his living situation, does he have a job, and does he go by his given name?

RaeRae: We don't know yet.

[jjandraerae-blog]

Rules for Dates #145

On a dating site, if your job is "Entrepreneur," I read "UNEMPLOYED." Close match.

[jjandraerae-blog]

I'm a successful real estate agent. I don't have time for this.

JJ

[jjandraerae-blog]

That's right, boys, text us your #StarbucksDrakeHands. We won't judge. We'll just make you internet famous.

[jjandraerae-blog]

Our friend, Joe vs. Siri

Joe: Siri, where can I find a boyfriend?

Siri: What is your boyfriend's name?

Joe: I don't have one yet.

[jjandraerae-blog]

A Chat with JJ and RaeRae

RaeRae: What would you do if a guy told you he changed his name because his original name was too simple?

JJ: I'd punch him in the face.

[jjandraerae-blog]

JJ vs. Siri

JJ: Siri, where can I find a boyfriend?

Siri: I'm really sorry about this, but I can't take any requests right now. Please try again later.

JJ: Siri can't help. She's having sex right now.

[jjandraerae-blog]

This month, two different guys I used to kiss have sent me songs about monogamy. I've got to stop smooching musicians.

RaeRae

[jjandraerae-blog]

Conversation with a man from the internets

RaeRae: So, your profile said you're a teacher?

Date: Yeah, not for years.

RaeRae: Oh.

Date: Not since I got into online poker.

RaeRae: Ah.

Date: I might go back to teaching, but I really want to FAIL at something first.

RaeRae: What are you hoping to fail at?

Date: You know those little shops underground at the el stops?

RaeRae: ... Uh-huh.

Date: I want to open a bakery in one of those.

RaeRae: Oh. Do you bake?

Date: Not at all.

RaeRae: Sounds like a plan.

[jjandraerae-blog]

Rules for Dates #1

Dating. Blows.