So @eternalstrigoli sent me this asking how it fits in with the Adult Teletubbies lore from my dream. I’m happy to say that it does fit in, although not in the way people expect.
In my dream lore, the Teletubbies on the popular show are actually toddlers, the captive young of a long-lived species of giant ancient cryptid. In my dream, the adult form of the Teletubby was an enormous shambling forest god.
Weirdly, this was supported by the statement from the BBC in the wake of the Gay Tinky Winky conversation, when they argued that the male-identified character’s use of a handbag was innocent, and in no way a marker of his orientation: “Tinky Winky is simply a sweet, technological baby with a magic bag.”
That’s right, the Beeb has stated that Tinky Winky is a baby.
You see, my theory says that the Tiddlytubbies, the reboot’s new “babies”, are indeed older babies or young toddlers. I argue that they are about the equivalent of one-year-old humans. The range could be from about 9 months to 18 months; but I’d say generally you would expect one-year-old humans to do the things the Tiddlytubbies do. They babble, tumble, toddle and play like slightly drunk kittens. They’re at the intersection of baby/toddler; capable of bumbling (toddling) around on their own, and they are reasonably autonomous, but still needing to be cared for and always falling over. In terms of physiology, they do resemble 1-year-olds, with the same physical proportions you would expect in a human of that age.
The Teletubbies, by contrast, are more like… 3 or 4 year olds. They’re toddlers, older ones, not quite school-age: developmentally capable of having short conversations, setting up games and activities, and performing simple self-care (preparing food, putting themselves to bed). In terms of physiology, they do have the cutely rounded/stubby appearance associated with this age of toddlers, who traditionally have those classic potbellies and little round butts that stick out.
And again, the BBC has stated that the Teletubbies are babies, not sexual beings at all.
Thus, I don’t think the existence of the Tiddlytubbies suggests that the Teletubbies from the show produced them. Using the lore from the dream, they are young captive infants, being brought up in the same controlled conditions as the existing older toddlers. Within several years, this new crop of infants may approach the size and development of the existing Original Four. And, perhaps, replacing them…