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Today's Document
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@joandaro
"shh. he never admits we're holding hands"
pro censorship people are always like “actually I’m living proof that books can be really harmful to kids! when I was a child I read a book that upset me and of course I couldn’t talk to my parents about it because they would throw rocks at me whenever I confessed to reading anything but the Bible, so as you can see, that book was the source of my trauma and warped ideas about right and wrong”
Also I’m sorry but I fundamentally cannot agree that “preserving innocence” in the form of ignorance of bad things is a desirable or even attainable goal for child rearing. The Siddhartha approach just isn’t realistic for a human being living in the world, you know? Your kids are going to learn about the cruelties of the world sooner or later. of course a book may be upsetting or disturbing and haunt them. but let’s be real—“read about it in a book” is one of the safest ways to encounter them.
I know I come across as a huge bitch when I say this but I have very low tolerance for people talking about how they were “traumatized” by the contents of a book. Were you? Were you really? Or were you upset and disturbed by the concepts you encountered in a book that your next door neighbor experienced first hand? Cry me a river, but while you were reading a book your classmate was getting beaten or raped at home or tortured in an institution, your neighbor was watching his dad getting tazed by cops or administering narcan to his mother, your playmate from that time at the fair was getting deported to be shot at or starve or imprisoned in a detention center and forced to sleep in her own filth… because these things happen to people! To children exactly like you but for some unlucky stroke of fate! If you didn’t read about it in a book, you’d hear about it somewhere else. On the school bus, maybe, from Natalie telling you about how her dad used to get her drunk and touch her. Or maybe at the grocery store, witnessing an ICE raid or a homeless man get his teeth kicked in. Or maybe walking into a dentist’s office and watching some news anchor explaining how it’s actually fine to drop a bomb on relief workers, or about how many tweens the President may have molested and if we should care, or if that teenager who just got shot for carrying a grocery bag wrong had it coming, or or or or—
Anyway. It sucks to read books that you weren’t psychologically ready for but it’s hardly a moral crisis. I promise I’m empathetic to the distress of children encountering concepts in books that frighten or disturb them but I cannot get behind the idea that preserving the untainted naivety of middle class white children about the things that can do and are happening to their peers is some all-important priority deserving laws about it.
The best remedies when children encounter disturbing books are talking to trusted adults and reading more books.
It's horrible that not all children have decent, trusted adults taking care of them. Remedying this is far more important and involves less collateral damage than stopping children from reading books, because the book that one kid found traumatising might be exactly the book another kid needs to help them.
I read plenty of things that messed me up as a kid, including a fantasy series that quickly devolved into the author clearly having a huge boner for excessive violence against women.
Do you know what I did? I stopped reading that series and I talked to a freaking adult about it. And then I went and read something else that didn’t involve surprise corpse mutilation
Are some concepts things that it would be better for kids not to encounter until they’re a little older? Maybe! But sometimes through chance they encounter them anyway, and tbh a book is one of the SAFEST ways that can happen because it introduces the Bad Thing to you without putting you directly in harms way.
Kids are gonna get exposed to some stuff before they’re ready. If it’s not books it’s gonna be something else. Maybe they sneak into the kitchen for a glass of water and catch a peek at an R rated movie their parents are watching. Maybe they click the wrong link on the internet or pick up a video game that looks cool but is maybe for an older audience. And maybe, god forbid, they may even witness something disturbing in real life. And when that happens it’s important they have a trusted adult in their lives who can help them talk about it in a safe and non-judgmental space. The answer is not to ban all discussion of Bad Things outright (especially when you consider that some people apparently consider the existence of periods among the list of Bad Things You Shouldn’t Show Children. And let me tell you as someone who hit puberty early, your first period is scary as FUCK if you don’t know what a period is beforehand. Every kid should know about periods before they have their first one.)
That is such a good point, @imsopopfly. Learning about a Bad Thing from written fiction is literally the least traumatic way to encounter it. Books let you stop in the middle of a page, a paragraph, a word, and don't have the "cannot unsee/unhear" impact of audiovisual media.
The following three problems are ranked from least serious to most serious:
A child reads a book that disturbs them, talks to trusted adults about it, and gets context and helpful coping strategies and recommendations for other books. This is not a problem at all, in fact it's an ideal situation where the child is developing independent reading skills and resilience with help and support.
A child reads a book that disturbs them and feels that they're unable to ask for adult help, even though in general the child is looked after by responsible guardians who care about their physical and mental health. This isn't ideal, but it is probably not going to cause any serious damage.
A child grows up in a high-censorship environment, where books are treated as dangerous and forbidden and their reading choices are sharply circumscribed. As a result, the child is less likely to develop a love of books and critical thinking skills. This is a serious problem.
For a child who is neglected or abused without responsible adults in their life, this is a terrible situation. Restricting a child's reading material is about as helpful in this situation as a concrete life jacket.
People banning books are exactly the reason why kids don't have a reliable adult to talk about and make it a trauma when they encounter shit in books.
what the actual fuck I'm doing lol
bloody blackguards never know when to back off
is that a blackguard-in-general trait in every game
so in my headcanon Dorn would randomly pick Jos up like that and just stand there and wonder how on earth the bhaalspawn is some scrawny necromancer like this
(and how did it become his problem)
Dorn + A3 !! I must have a crying picture of my sweet bad boy.
How could I refuse a request like this! ♡
Did Valdir forbid him to kill someone he really wanted to? :D
A problem that cannot be solved with immediate murder? Inconceivable. Just imagine Valdir being reasonable:
“No, Dorn, we need this one alive. Yes, I’m serious! …Don’t give me that look, you can kill them later.”
Bwahahahahaha
prprprprprprpr
Our big, lovable brute and some of his biggest fans… as cats~ Just because.
I’m open to adding more Charname’s with a crush on Dorn turned kitties. Here are @avandra Cat, @joandaro Jos, @dorkagedoodles Heidrek @shaydh Valdir and my own Anqi ;3
funniest reply to being asked why you made someone fight their boss to the death thirty seconds ago
I love Vulcans, they’re hilarious.
yeah that's my charname kidnapping his arm
Charname: What is, in your obviously very professional opinion, the best way to die?
Xan, deadpan: I heard being set on fire is actually very calming.
Xzar: Montaron.
Montaron: What?
Xzar: Stop tripping me.
Montaron: Stop tripping yourself!
Xzar: If you were significant enough to notice, I wouldn’t step on you.
Montaron: Yeah, well… your mom!
Xzar: …That was disappointing. I expected better from you.
Montaron: Eh, sorry, I was in a rush.
Imoen: Us working together? Really? Really?
Sarevok: That's the worst toast ever.
Garrick: I’m too young to die!
Kagain: I’m not, but I still don’t wanna!