Hellooo! This is a sideblog created just to share my writing about Joost!
My main is @dat-zijn-pannenkoeken and that’s my messy blog. I post about all kinds of stuff - Joost too, but not only (aka my hyperfixations).
On this blog, I will solely post about Joost, more specifically fanfics. If you wanna see/send asks about other artists/unrelated things, please use my main! Dms are open for anything on either blog tho!
I only write gn!reader and male!reader ‼️ NO ships or fem!reader
Asks don’t need to be just requests, you guys can say whatever you want about Joost (both sfw and nsfw are more than okay), as long as it’s POSITIVE and RESPECTFUL. I won’t tolerate hate speech towards ANYONE. This is a safe space.
MINORS, please DON’T talk to me about sexual things NOR interact with them. I can’t stop you from reading, but it is NOT meant for you. I don’t support children in adult fields. I’m an adult and this is a +18 blog, so I don’t want anything to do with minors. There WILL be sexual and graphic stuff here!!
I can write A LOT of kinks, but I WON’T WRITE: rape, pedofilia, incest, watersports, scat, sounding, feet kink, daddy kink (I fw it except when it comes to Joost, for obvious reasons), ships/fem!reader and anything I feel uncomfortable with. I also won’t write about Joost’s parents nor the ESC incident (I can write about ESC but only something that doesn’t involve his trauma. Reader and Joost being both contestants and/or stuff like that is fine).
I write about most things, so don’t be afraid to ask!
Do not, however, take my fics as a sex guide. Not everything works like that in real life. Always protect yourselves and your partner(s) when having sex.
Anons/emojis taken: 🪶
My fics will be tagged as #cappuccinofic (with smut/sexual being #irishcoffeesmut and non sexual being #lattenosmut), asks will be tagged as #espressoask and headcanons as #ristrettoheadcanons (and yes, it’s all names of coffees because of my username and because I can)
Description: Joost has a dream about you, but he can't wait until the morning to recreate it.
Warnings: Smut (+18 ‼️) anal, somno, no prep, coming inside, coming in boxers, coming untouched, cockwarming and kinda mean, condescending dom!Joost 😩
Word count: 1.8k
Author's Note: Hiya guys! I'm back into writing after a while has passed. I still have requests to work on, but I honestly couldn't find the motivation to write since I also lost someone in a tragic way last month... This is actually the first thing I managed to write after that and I can't believe it's filthy smut and not some sad, hurt/comfort fic 😅 Anyways, enjoy and I'll be prioritizing the mlm requests I got since that's what I was planning for Pride Month :)
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A whine left your lips at the same time that another met your neck between shaky sighs and breaths. The hand that held your waist tightened its grip slightly to keep you from squirming too much - which was a difficult task since every time Joost pushed further inside, you would stir and let out these soft little hums. He was trying his best not to bury his face in your neck to supress his own sounds because of how ticklish he knew you were. The feeling of his mustache against your skin would just make you move even more - if not wake you up completely. And Joost didn't want that. All he wanted was to get some relief after a specific dream he had just woken up from in the middle of the night. A hot, wet dream about his sweet boyfriend who - unbeknownst to Joost's dirty thoughts - slept soundly beside him. So, in a horny daze, the Dutch man had pushed down your sleep shorts just enough for his leaking cock to slide between your cheeks. He didn't even know if you could take it... your vulnerable body definitely not stretched enough for his length. So he kept torturing himself by pushing very slowly inside, careful not to hurt you but desperately wanting to feel your tight heat surrounding him. And God if he wasn't feeling it... your walls kept clenching around his throbbing dick, making it pulse even more and driving him insane with need. All the while you looked like an absolute angel in your sleep; brows furrowing every once in a while and lips parting to let some moans escape you. That vision made him momentarily forget about being gentle and a hard thrust caused his cock to sink further inside your hole, which earned him a weak, high pitched sound from you. Fuck, you were adorable.
Then, in a completely sleepy voice, you muttered:
"Joost..."
He froze. He wasn't sure if you were talking in your sleep or if he had woken you with his actions. You sounded so tired, so far into dreamland still; yet your tone was laced with affection, like you were aware of what was happening. And maybe you were. Even if your brain was convinced this was all just a dream. And Joost wouldn't doubt that the soft murmur had only been a result of said dream if it wasn't for the other one that followed after he tried to press his hips forward again.
"Joost? 's that you?" That confused, weak question combined with the slight stir of your body made him melt. You were awake. Barely.
"Yeah, yeah, baby, it's me, don't worry." His rough yet loving voice whispered against your ear and his lips met your neck, almost as if to reassure you it was indeed him.
You let out a contented sigh at that, moving to get comfortable. But as soon as you did, you felt the wet mess in your boxers from the pre-cum you had leaked and the stretch of having your boyfriend's dick buried inside you. And you whined. You whined because of how full and sticky and helpless you felt. Because of how big he was.
"Babeee..."
"Oh my sweet prince, what's the matter, hm?" He started planting a series of soft kisses all over your neck, the rhythm so tender and slow that you could feel yourself being pulled into dreamland again.
"Too much..."
"Too much? It's not too much, schatje." Joost gripped your hips, gently guiding them closer to his crotch. "You're just really tight. But I'm taking care of it." He resumed the sweet pecks, distracting you from any complains you could possibly have. He knew you didn't have any, though. Not any real ones.
"Joooost~" You dragged out his name and instantly felt his dick twitch.
"Fuck, say that again." The words left his lips in a sigh as he pushed deeper inside you, making you feel completely stuffed and breathless.
"Joost, I-"
"Mm, that's my boy~" His tattooed hand wrapped around your chin, interrupting you. He squeezed it, forcing you to turn your head so he could clash his mouth onto yours.
The kiss was messy with need, dizzying with the way he devoured your lips and drank every sound that slipped from them; your weak protests quickly drowned by the saliva you two were now sharing. You could barely keep up with his movements from how sleepy you were, but he also didn't give you time to process anything. His hips started doing these slow, shallow motions, carefully testing to see if you would stop him or complain. When you didn't, he decided to continue, dragging his cock inside your walls in the most patient way and eventually slowing down his rough kisses to match the soft thrusts. His mouth and hips worked in sync, each meeting you at the same time and pulling gasps and whimpers out of you. It was too much for your fuzzy mind to register. For Joost, however, it was definitely not enough. He was fighting every urge in his body not to just sink all the way in and pound you mercilessly.
But before you knew it, the wet sounds of his mouth against yours had subsided and his warm, labored breathing had shifted to your neck - hips never stopping. You took the chance to speak up, trying to regain your own breath as you did so.
"Damn," You panted. "what's gotten into you?"
"You did. You and your way of always showing up in my dreams." His nose pressed against your jaw, making his coarse mustache chafe your sensitive skin with every kiss. You giggled at his words.
"So now it's my fault for showing up in your dreams?"
"You should've seen how you looked, baby." He grunted into your neck, trying to control himself, but clearly losing the battle.
"Why? Did I look hot in your little dream?" A sly smile crossed your face as you teased him, but it quickly turned into a desperate, needy look when he suddenly slammed his hips into you.
"You always look hot."
He picked up the pace, giving a hard squeeze to your waist before letting his hand slide to your stomach, bringing you impossibly closer with that large palm splayed just below your chest. The moonlight was faintly illuminating the room which allowed you to see and admire the 'Unity' tattoo on his pale skin and get a glimpse of the ones adorning his fingers. Sexy.
"But to answer your question: yes, you looked damn hot." He continued and his voice went straight to your cock, making you a little dumb from how turned on you were.
"I can tell from the way you're fucking me..."
He chuckled. And it wasn't that cute, breathy giggle of his that you were so used to listening. It was different. It was a low sound in his throat. A sound of someone who knows they're doing something right; someone who knows they're making their partner see stars. A sound of someone who knows they fuck good.
"Ja? Feels good now, doesn't it? And to think you were complaining..."
"I wasn't. It's just... a lot for someone who was sleeping just minutes ago."
"Oh poor baby." He cooed in faux-sympathy. "Sorry I interrupted your beauty sleep. Let me just finish and then you can go back to whatever dream it was that you were having, okay? I promise I'll be quick."
But his grin against your neck told you he wasn't even sorry in the slightest for waking you and that he definitely wasn't taking pity on you. Either way, your brain was too mushy to care about that now. All you could think about was the painful hard-on straining your boxers and begging to be touched. Yet Joost was too busy chasing his own orgasm to care.
Your hand slipped under the waistband of your underwear in search of giving yourself some relief, but a strong grip on your wrist stopped you before your fingers could even reach it.
"That's my job, schat." He said in a stern tone. "And I don't even need my hand to get it done." He let go of yours - knowing you'd listen and behave - and grabbed your hip again, pumping his in a fast, mercilessly rhythm. "You're gonna come from my dick alone, okay, baby?"
"Joost, I don't know if I-"
"Okay, baby?" He repeated the question, leaving no room for arguments.
"Y-Yes, sir." The title escaped you accidentally - your mind completely in subspace.
"Good boy." He smirked and started giving you soft, messy kisses on your neck as a reward for how well-behaved you were being. "Wat een lieve jongetje, hè? Je luistert zo goed~"
Maybe Joost was right. Maybe you could actually come untouched.
"Mmm, I can feel you clenching around me, sweet boy~" He purred against your skin. "Are you close? Because I am. So fucking close. I'm gonna pump you full of my cum so you can finally sleep comfortably. I know that's how you like to sleep." Joost's thrusts became sloppy and his grip on your hips tightened enough to bruise.
You were a whiny mess; forced to feel your back getting wet from his sweaty chest hair, while he panted into your skin and whispered curses, teetering closer and closer to the edge. Your moans only intensified, reaching their peak once you finally felt him let go and paint your walls with his warm, sticky cum. Joost grunted through his climax, pressing himself right up against you and letting his hips roll a couple more times to ride out his high and make sure he had spilled every single drop inside you. His actions were enough to trigger your own orgasm which quickly made you clench around his length as you shot white ropes against the fabric of your boxers without even being touched.
"Fuck~" You whimpered weakly, getting a chuckle in response.
"See? Told you I could make you come from my dick alone." Despite his cocky tone, Joost didn't waste any time and immediately nuzzled your neck, showering you in sweet kisses. "Now you can go back to sleep." He sighed happily, pushing his hips forward as well as his release further inside your hole.
"All sticky like this?"
"Just go back to sleep, baby. I know you're tired."
"Don't you think we should clean u-"
"Shhh be a good boy and close your eyes for me." His lips met the corner of your mouth while he squeezed you tighter and put his leg on top of yours, ready to return to a peaceful slumber.
And damn if you didn't want to be Joost's good boy... so once again you followed his orders without questioning them; closing your eyes like you were told and accepting that you would be falling asleep with a wet mess in your boxers and his softening cock still buried deep inside you.
Somno except you just kiss Joost's hands while he's asleep, giving them sweet pecks all over as you murmur to yourself about how big they are and how his fingers are so thick and perfect... until you decide to guide one of his hands lower. Into your sleep shorts. Using his pretty hands to make yourself feel good and get off while he rests beside you like an angel. An angel who's making you come for the third time without even knowing it.
Description: Joost has a dream about you, but he can't wait until the morning to recreate it.
Warnings: Smut (+18 ‼️) anal, somno, no prep, coming inside, coming in boxers, coming untouched, cockwarming and kinda mean, condescending dom!Joost 😩
Word count: 1.8k
Author's Note: Hiya guys! I'm back into writing after a while has passed. I still have requests to work on, but I honestly couldn't find the motivation to write since I also lost someone in a tragic way last month... This is actually the first thing I managed to write after that and I can't believe it's filthy smut and not some sad, hurt/comfort fic 😅 Anyways, enjoy and I'll be prioritizing the mlm requests I got since that's what I was planning for Pride Month :)
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A whine left your lips at the same time that another met your neck between shaky sighs and breaths. The hand that held your waist tightened its grip slightly to keep you from squirming too much - which was a difficult task since every time Joost pushed further inside, you would stir and let out these soft little hums. He was trying his best not to bury his face in your neck to supress his own sounds because of how ticklish he knew you were. The feeling of his mustache against your skin would just make you move even more - if not wake you up completely. And Joost didn't want that. All he wanted was to get some relief after a specific dream he had just woken up from in the middle of the night. A hot, wet dream about his sweet boyfriend who - unbeknownst to Joost's dirty thoughts - slept soundly beside him. So, in a horny daze, the Dutch man had pushed down your sleep shorts just enough for his leaking cock to slide between your cheeks. He didn't even know if you could take it... your vulnerable body definitely not stretched enough for his length. So he kept torturing himself by pushing very slowly inside, careful not to hurt you but desperately wanting to feel your tight heat surrounding him. And God if he wasn't feeling it... your walls kept clenching around his throbbing dick, making it pulse even more and driving him insane with need. All the while you looked like an absolute angel in your sleep; brows furrowing every once in a while and lips parting to let some moans escape you. That vision made him momentarily forget about being gentle and a hard thrust caused his cock to sink further inside your hole, which earned him a weak, high pitched sound from you. Fuck, you were adorable.
Then, in a completely sleepy voice, you muttered:
"Joost..."
He froze. He wasn't sure if you were talking in your sleep or if he had woken you with his actions. You sounded so tired, so far into dreamland still; yet your tone was laced with affection, like you were aware of what was happening. And maybe you were. Even if your brain was convinced this was all just a dream. And Joost wouldn't doubt that the soft murmur had only been a result of said dream if it wasn't for the other one that followed after he tried to press his hips forward again.
"Joost? 's that you?" That confused, weak question combined with the slight stir of your body made him melt. You were awake. Barely.
"Yeah, yeah, baby, it's me, don't worry." His rough yet loving voice whispered against your ear and his lips met your neck, almost as if to reassure you it was indeed him.
You let out a contented sigh at that, moving to get comfortable. But as soon as you did, you felt the wet mess in your boxers from the pre-cum you had leaked and the stretch of having your boyfriend's dick buried inside you. And you whined. You whined because of how full and sticky and helpless you felt. Because of how big he was.
"Babeee..."
"Oh my sweet prince, what's the matter, hm?" He started planting a series of soft kisses all over your neck, the rhythm so tender and slow that you could feel yourself being pulled into dreamland again.
"Too much..."
"Too much? It's not too much, schatje." Joost gripped your hips, gently guiding them closer to his crotch. "You're just really tight. But I'm taking care of it." He resumed the sweet pecks, distracting you from any complains you could possibly have. He knew you didn't have any, though. Not any real ones.
"Joooost~" You dragged out his name and instantly felt his dick twitch.
"Fuck, say that again." The words left his lips in a sigh as he pushed deeper inside you, making you feel completely stuffed and breathless.
"Joost, I-"
"Mm, that's my boy~" His tattooed hand wrapped around your chin, interrupting you. He squeezed it, forcing you to turn your head so he could clash his mouth onto yours.
The kiss was messy with need, dizzying with the way he devoured your lips and drank every sound that slipped from them; your weak protests quickly drowned by the saliva you two were now sharing. You could barely keep up with his movements from how sleepy you were, but he also didn't give you time to process anything. His hips started doing these slow, shallow motions, carefully testing to see if you would stop him or complain. When you didn't, he decided to continue, dragging his cock inside your walls in the most patient way and eventually slowing down his rough kisses to match the soft thrusts. His mouth and hips worked in sync, each meeting you at the same time and pulling gasps and whimpers out of you. It was too much for your fuzzy mind to register. For Joost, however, it was definitely not enough. He was fighting every urge in his body not to just sink all the way in and pound you mercilessly.
But before you knew it, the wet sounds of his mouth against yours had subsided and his warm, labored breathing had shifted to your neck - hips never stopping. You took the chance to speak up, trying to regain your own breath as you did so.
"Damn," You panted. "what's gotten into you?"
"You did. You and your way of always showing up in my dreams." His nose pressed against your jaw, making his coarse mustache chafe your sensitive skin with every kiss. You giggled at his words.
"So now it's my fault for showing up in your dreams?"
"You should've seen how you looked, baby." He grunted into your neck, trying to control himself, but clearly losing the battle.
"Why? Did I look hot in your little dream?" A sly smile crossed your face as you teased him, but it quickly turned into a desperate, needy look when he suddenly slammed his hips into you.
"You always look hot."
He picked up the pace, giving a hard squeeze to your waist before letting his hand slide to your stomach, bringing you impossibly closer with that large palm splayed just below your chest. The moonlight was faintly illuminating the room which allowed you to see and admire the 'Unity' tattoo on his pale skin and get a glimpse of the ones adorning his fingers. Sexy.
"But to answer your question: yes, you looked damn hot." He continued and his voice went straight to your cock, making you a little dumb from how turned on you were.
"I can tell from the way you're fucking me..."
He chuckled. And it wasn't that cute, breathy giggle of his that you were so used to listening. It was different. It was a low sound in his throat. A sound of someone who knows they're doing something right; someone who knows they're making their partner see stars. A sound of someone who knows they fuck good.
"Ja? Feels good now, doesn't it? And to think you were complaining..."
"I wasn't. It's just... a lot for someone who was sleeping just minutes ago."
"Oh poor baby." He cooed in faux-sympathy. "Sorry I interrupted your beauty sleep. Let me just finish and then you can go back to whatever dream it was that you were having, okay? I promise I'll be quick."
But his grin against your neck told you he wasn't even sorry in the slightest for waking you and that he definitely wasn't taking pity on you. Either way, your brain was too mushy to care about that now. All you could think about was the painful hard-on straining your boxers and begging to be touched. Yet Joost was too busy chasing his own orgasm to care.
Your hand slipped under the waistband of your underwear in search of giving yourself some relief, but a strong grip on your wrist stopped you before your fingers could even reach it.
"That's my job, schat." He said in a stern tone. "And I don't even need my hand to get it done." He let go of yours - knowing you'd listen and behave - and grabbed your hip again, pumping his in a fast, mercilessly rhythm. "You're gonna come from my dick alone, okay, baby?"
"Joost, I don't know if I-"
"Okay, baby?" He repeated the question, leaving no room for arguments.
"Y-Yes, sir." The title escaped you accidentally - your mind completely in subspace.
"Good boy." He smirked and started giving you soft, messy kisses on your neck as a reward for how well-behaved you were being. "Wat een lieve jongetje, hè? Je luistert zo goed~"
Maybe Joost was right. Maybe you could actually come untouched.
"Mmm, I can feel you clenching around me, sweet boy~" He purred against your skin. "Are you close? Because I am. So fucking close. I'm gonna pump you full of my cum so you can finally sleep comfortably. I know that's how you like to sleep." Joost's thrusts became sloppy and his grip on your hips tightened enough to bruise.
You were a whiny mess; forced to feel your back getting wet from his sweaty chest hair, while he panted into your skin and whispered curses, teetering closer and closer to the edge. Your moans only intensified, reaching their peak once you finally felt him let go and paint your walls with his warm, sticky cum. Joost grunted through his climax, pressing himself right up against you and letting his hips roll a couple more times to ride out his high and make sure he had spilled every single drop inside you. His actions were enough to trigger your own orgasm which quickly made you clench around his length as you shot white ropes against the fabric of your boxers without even being touched.
"Fuck~" You whimpered weakly, getting a chuckle in response.
"See? Told you I could make you come from my dick alone." Despite his cocky tone, Joost didn't waste any time and immediately nuzzled your neck, showering you in sweet kisses. "Now you can go back to sleep." He sighed happily, pushing his hips forward as well as his release further inside your hole.
"All sticky like this?"
"Just go back to sleep, baby. I know you're tired."
"Don't you think we should clean u-"
"Shhh be a good boy and close your eyes for me." His lips met the corner of your mouth while he squeezed you tighter and put his leg on top of yours, ready to return to a peaceful slumber.
And damn if you didn't want to be Joost's good boy... so once again you followed his orders without questioning them; closing your eyes like you were told and accepting that you would be falling asleep with a wet mess in your boxers and his softening cock still buried deep inside you.
Thinking abt Joost and reader trying to cool off in their apartment bc they both run very warm and it is hot as FUCK rn. But reader lowk thinks joost all sweaty is kinda hot so maybe it's not so bad after all!!! Poor joost can't even wear too much clothes bc it's just too hot :( not that I am complaining....
-🪶
Ooh that's actually very cute... and sexy hehe Joost walking around the house in just his boxers, all sweaty 😵💫 And if he's anything like me, imagine him immediately taking his clothes off once he gets home. Maybe you didn't even get the chance to greet him and he's already stripping down to his boxers. I have a feeling he probably does that irl 🤭
Also, him and reader struggling to cuddle in this heat, so they just hold hands while sleepinggg
And Joost waking up with the sheets glued to his body from sweat 😵💫
I’m foolish I think these were what I was thinking of, I genuinely can’t find the one backstage tho I’m sure it exists he’s standing with Daan maybe, he’s wearing the shearling “ugg” style boots, and he’s standing knees together. can’t say if he was shirtless or not in it. I don’t think so atp
Thinking abt Joost and reader trying to cool off in their apartment bc they both run very warm and it is hot as FUCK rn. But reader lowk thinks joost all sweaty is kinda hot so maybe it's not so bad after all!!! Poor joost can't even wear too much clothes bc it's just too hot :( not that I am complaining....
-🪶
Ooh that's actually very cute... and sexy hehe Joost walking around the house in just his boxers, all sweaty 😵💫 And if he's anything like me, imagine him immediately taking his clothes off once he gets home. Maybe you didn't even get the chance to greet him and he's already stripping down to his boxers. I have a feeling he probably does that irl 🤭
Also, him and reader struggling to cuddle in this heat, so they just hold hands while sleepinggg
And Joost waking up with the sheets glued to his body from sweat 😵💫
Thinking abt Joost and reader trying to cool off in their apartment bc they both run very warm and it is hot as FUCK rn. But reader lowk thinks joost all sweaty is kinda hot so maybe it's not so bad after all!!! Poor joost can't even wear too much clothes bc it's just too hot :( not that I am complaining....
-🪶
Ooh that's actually very cute... and sexy hehe Joost walking around the house in just his boxers, all sweaty 😵💫 And if he's anything like me, imagine him immediately taking his clothes off once he gets home. Maybe you didn't even get the chance to greet him and he's already stripping down to his boxers. I have a feeling he probably does that irl 🤭
Also, him and reader struggling to cuddle in this heat, so they just hold hands while sleepinggg
And Joost waking up with the sheets glued to his body from sweat 😵💫
Also thinking abt joost and reader having a fun lil beach day to try and beat the heat 😸 cute cute cute!!! (i am projecting because i am BOILING ALIVE IM MELTING)
-🪶
I've thought about a beach scenario with Joost before but never in a fluff way and now I'm picturing this and- 🥹
I think about those old pics of him and the recent video he posted at the beach way more often than I'll admit... Maaan, I'd love to go to the beach with him! Swimming all day and staying until the sunset... applying sunscreen to his back 💭 being silly together in the water 💭
Thinking abt Joost and reader trying to cool off in their apartment bc they both run very warm and it is hot as FUCK rn. But reader lowk thinks joost all sweaty is kinda hot so maybe it's not so bad after all!!! Poor joost can't even wear too much clothes bc it's just too hot :( not that I am complaining....
-🪶
Ooh that's actually very cute... and sexy hehe Joost walking around the house in just his boxers, all sweaty 😵💫 And if he's anything like me, imagine him immediately taking his clothes off once he gets home. Maybe you didn't even get the chance to greet him and he's already stripping down to his boxers. I have a feeling he probably does that irl 🤭
Also, him and reader struggling to cuddle in this heat, so they just hold hands while sleepinggg
And Joost waking up with the sheets glued to his body from sweat 😵💫
do you happen to have ao3.. these are so peak however i fear i will always lose them in the middle of reading because my tumblr likes to randomly stop working 🥹 just wondering …..
Noooo :( I don't, sorry... I like posting on Tumblr because it's kind of a "forgotten social" so it's like we are a secret Joost club 🤭 hope your Tumblr stops acting weird tho :(
OMG BEEN THINKING ABT THIS SINCE I RECENTLY HIT 4 MONTHS ON TESTOSTERONE #flex
joost helping transmasc reader with his t shots :( reader is scared of needles so joost helps him with them, comforting him and talking him through it. And once reader gets further on t, joost commenting and complimenting reader on the changes, telling him how proud he is of him awwww :(
When he said "I don't understand trans hate" he meant it PERSONALLY bc he adores and worships his AWESOME HANDSOME COOL TRANSGENDER BOYFRIEND and he doesn't understand why people can hate something as beautiful as that!!!! GAH!! Happy pride btw I love being gay and transgender LOLLL
-🪶
First of all, CONGRATS 🙌🏻
Second of all, that’s such a cute idea! Allow me to write a little smth 🤭 Happy Prideee 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️
JUST MAKES YOU HUMAN
Joost x transmasc!reader
Description: Joost helps you with your t-shot and reassures you
Warnings: Mention of needles (duh), tiny little bit of blood (blink and you’ll miss it), dysphoria and hurt/comfort
Word count: 1.7k
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A few good minutes had passed since your gaze had first focused on your nightstand. You couldn’t look away, but you also couldn’t convince your body to move. So you just stared. It was always like this. Needle and testosterone ready to use, yet untouched for several minutes after they had been placed there. Not because you didn’t want to do your shot - God, that was the highlight of your week! - but because you were scared. Scared of that sharp, metal thing that had to pierce your skin to make you feel like yourself. It was so unfair that one of the greatest joys in your transition was also something that filled you with an awful sense of anxiety.
Fortunately, you had other joys in your life that didn’t involve those stressful feelings and that helped you deal with them... And said joy was currently turning the key in the lock of your shared apartment and stepping inside, greeting you in an unmistakable cheerful voice.
“Babyyy, I’m hooome!”
Soon, the door to the bedroom was being opened and your eyes were finally leaving the items to meet your boyfriend’s. His sweet expression made you forgot about any fear you had for a moment.
“Hallo!” He beamed, eyebrows raising as he found you sitting in bed in your boxers, legs dangling from the edge of it, and apparently just staring off into the distance. He walked up to you, taking your face in his hands and gently kissing your lips.
“Hi~” You answered with a smitten look after the kiss.
“Hi, handsome~” Joost matched your expression, thumbs rubbing your cheeks affectionately. “Waiting for me in bed already?”
You let out a small chuckle. “I was about to do my t-shot, actually.”
“Oh, you go ahead then. I’ll give you some privacy while I go change.” He kissed your cheek, letting his fingers slide down your arm and intertwine with yours before reluctantly pulling away.
Truth was, you kinda didn’t want Joost to leave. Now that he was home, you wanted him by your side while you administered the inevitable injection, comforting you throughout the whole process; but in a matter of seconds he had already disappeared into the bathroom.
That’s okay. You could do this alone, right? You always did. It was no big deal. You just had to suck it up and do it. Yup.
Yet, when you realized, another 10 minutes had passed and Joost was coming out of the bathroom, fully dressed, and being met with the sight of his boyfriend in the exact same position he was in when Joost got home. The Dutch man couldn’t help but smile tenderly at how you looked up at him like a kitten in the rain.
“Sooo, we’re doing it telekinesis style today?” He asked in a soft voice as he approached you, making you laugh a little.
“Just… gaining the courage.”
“I see…” He kneeled in front of you on the floor so the height difference wasn’t as noticeable, and took your hands in his, resting his chin on your knees. “And how long have you been trying to gain the courage for?”
“…a while.”
“So I’ve noticed.” A couple of gentle pecks landed on your thighs before he continued. “What’s the matter, schat?”
“Nothing, I just…” You sighed. You hated admitting your weaknesses. “I’m not particularly fond of needles. So I gotta, like, prepare myself mentally first.”
“Oh… That’s okay.” His soft, thick fingers massaged your thighs. “You could’ve asked for help, you know? I would’ve gladly helped.”
“I know. I just always thought it was something I had to do on my own, but maybe I do need you.” You admitted in a small voice.
“And I’m here, baby. You don’t have to do this alone. It’s okay to ask for help.”
Before you could register anything, Joost’s hands were already moving to grab the alcohol swab from the nightstand and opening the packaging. He wiped your thigh with all the care in the world, looking up at you for approval.
“Like this?” When you nodded in response, a playful cocky smile crossed his lips. “See? I know how to do it.” He got rid of the used swab, eyeing the other items before meeting your gaze again. “Okay, now what?”
You giggled at his clueless expression and then pointed to the source of your stress, feeling a bit more at ease now that Joost was with you.
“Now I’m gonna need that and the vial.”
Joost gave you the supplies, watching how you got everything ready, passing the testosterone to the syringe with practiced hands. Once that was done, you held the needle about an inch from your skin, eyes fixed on it as you tried to convince your brain to collaborate.
“Let’s go, baby, you can do it. I’m here with you.” Joost watched your face, the way your eyebrows furrowed in concentration and distress, the way your lips parted to let out quick breaths. He saw hesitation written all over your features. “You want me to do it?”
That made you leave your bubble of anxiety for a second.
“You know how to do it?”
“Not really, but I can learn.” He offered a reassuring smile, taking the syringe from you. “So, show me.”
You had to fight a smile of your own - a stupid little one that threatened to form - so you could illustrate everything properly. But it was no use. A huge, adoring grin accompanied your detailed explanation. You were so in love with that man.
After listening to what you had to say, Joost gently stretched the skin of your thigh flat with one hand and held the needle with the other, observing your reaction to see if he was doing everything right and if that was the correct spot.
“Want me to do it quickly or slowly?” He asked after having the confirmation. “I feel like I’ll miss if I do it quick. I don’t wanna hurt you.”
“If you do it slow that’s way more painful. Plus, I just wanna get this over with. But you won’t miss, baby, don’t worry.”
“You sure?”
“I’m sure.”
“Okay… You just relax, schatje, it will be very quick and then it’s over. Don’t look and don’t focus too much on it, alright? Just listen to my voice.”
“Mhm…” You agreed weakly, suddenly finding the ceiling very interesting.
“On the count of three. One… two… three!” He jabbed the needle into your muscle; the action earning just the tiniest hiss from you. “Shhh shhh I’m here. The hardest part is done.” Without rushing things, Joost slowly pushed the plunger in. “And you’re being so good for me. You’re so brave. My brave boy.”
Despite what Joost had told you, you looked down. It wasn’t on purpose. Your head had moved on its own accord; curiosity getting the best of you. Fortunately, his tattooed fingers covered the intrusion to your skin, stopping you from seeing something that would definitely make you uncomfortable. Instead, your eyes focused on your boyfriend’s face. The concentration on it was honestly adorable. It almost seemed like he was holding his breath just so he wouldn’t accidentally move and hurt you. He finally let it out once the plunger was pushed all the way down.
“Aaaand testosterone in.” He announced with a silly deep voice, capable of making sport commentators jealous; and making it really damn hard for you not to move with the chuckle that escaped you.
With renewed worry, he took the needle out as steady as he could, careful not to be too rough. As soon as the metal tip was visible, he looked at you with a proud smile.
“Done!” He set the syringe on the nightstand and got up from the floor, grabbing your face and kissing you all over. “I’m so proud of you! You didn’t even flinch! And thank God.” A giggle escaped him, but it was quickly interrupted when he noticed a small drop of blood on your thigh. “Fuck, is bleeding normal? Please tell me it’s normal. I knew I shouldn’t have done it quickly!”
“Joost, it’s normal, don’t worry!” You laughed while grabbing a cotton ball and gently pressed it against the spot. “It was only a tiny little bit, see? Don’t freak out.”
“Oh… I knew that, I’m a professional.” He grinned sheepishly, sitting on the bed, next to you. “It went well then, right?”
“Yes. It usually does, it’s just the needle to skin contact that makes me nervous.” You sighed, frustrated with the situation. “I really gotta get over this stupid fear.”
“It’s not stupid, baby.” His hand moved to your thigh, thumb rubbing it affectionately. “Feeling scared is a normal thing. Everyone is scared of something. Don’t put that much pressure on yourself.”
“I know, but sometimes I can’t help but feel like… this makes me less of a man, you know? That… being scared of needles is not very manly. I know it’s not like that! But I can’t seem to convince the deepest part of my brain.”
“Why would being scared of needles make you less of a man, huh? Every man is scared of something, no matter what they might say. It’s part of being a person. Being scared doesn’t make you less manly, it just makes you human.” Joost took your face in his hands, making you look at him. “Besides, every man worries about being ‘man enough’ - whatever that means - at a certain point in their lives. Some just stop giving a fuck about it eventually. That’s what I did. And it feels damn good not to worry about what others think of you. You know who you are, don’t you? Well, that’s all that matters.”
“I-I don’t even know what to say-“
“You don’t need to say anything, baby. It’s the truth. And even if you doubt it, I know you’re a man. My man. My handsome boyfriend.” His lips met yours in a series of tender pecks. “And I love you.”
“I love you too, Joost.”
Maybe you were still incredibly afraid of needles, but at least every time you were in your boyfriend’s arms, you felt like the most powerful man on Earth.
————————————
PS: The changes part didn’t fit into this little fic, but it’s so sweet! And Joostie would totally shower reader in compliments, noticing the changes in his voice and the face structure and how much hairier he’s getting… everything <3
OMG BEEN THINKING ABT THIS SINCE I RECENTLY HIT 4 MONTHS ON TESTOSTERONE #flex
joost helping transmasc reader with his t shots :( reader is scared of needles so joost helps him with them, comforting him and talking him through it. And once reader gets further on t, joost commenting and complimenting reader on the changes, telling him how proud he is of him awwww :(
When he said "I don't understand trans hate" he meant it PERSONALLY bc he adores and worships his AWESOME HANDSOME COOL TRANSGENDER BOYFRIEND and he doesn't understand why people can hate something as beautiful as that!!!! GAH!! Happy pride btw I love being gay and transgender LOLLL
-🪶
First of all, CONGRATS 🙌🏻
Second of all, that’s such a cute idea! Allow me to write a little smth 🤭 Happy Prideee 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️
JUST MAKES YOU HUMAN
Joost x transmasc!reader
Description: Joost helps you with your t-shot and reassures you
Warnings: Mention of needles (duh), tiny little bit of blood (blink and you’ll miss it), dysphoria and hurt/comfort
Word count: 1.7k
————————————
A few good minutes had passed since your gaze had first focused on your nightstand. You couldn’t look away, but you also couldn’t convince your body to move. So you just stared. It was always like this. Needle and testosterone ready to use, yet untouched for several minutes after they had been placed there. Not because you didn’t want to do your shot - God, that was the highlight of your week! - but because you were scared. Scared of that sharp, metal thing that had to pierce your skin to make you feel like yourself. It was so unfair that one of the greatest joys in your transition was also something that filled you with an awful sense of anxiety.
Fortunately, you had other joys in your life that didn’t involve those stressful feelings and that helped you deal with them... And said joy was currently turning the key in the lock of your shared apartment and stepping inside, greeting you in an unmistakable cheerful voice.
“Babyyy, I’m hooome!”
Soon, the door to the bedroom was being opened and your eyes were finally leaving the items to meet your boyfriend’s. His sweet expression made you forgot about any fear you had for a moment.
“Hallo!” He beamed, eyebrows raising as he found you sitting in bed in your boxers, legs dangling from the edge of it, and apparently just staring off into the distance. He walked up to you, taking your face in his hands and gently kissing your lips.
“Hi~” You answered with a smitten look after the kiss.
“Hi, handsome~” Joost matched your expression, thumbs rubbing your cheeks affectionately. “Waiting for me in bed already?”
You let out a small chuckle. “I was about to do my t-shot, actually.”
“Oh, you go ahead then. I’ll give you some privacy while I go change.” He kissed your cheek, letting his fingers slide down your arm and intertwine with yours before reluctantly pulling away.
Truth was, you kinda didn’t want Joost to leave. Now that he was home, you wanted him by your side while you administered the inevitable injection, comforting you throughout the whole process; but in a matter of seconds he had already disappeared into the bathroom.
That’s okay. You could do this alone, right? You always did. It was no big deal. You just had to suck it up and do it. Yup.
Yet, when you realized, another 10 minutes had passed and Joost was coming out of the bathroom, fully dressed, and being met with the sight of his boyfriend in the exact same position he was in when Joost got home. The Dutch man couldn’t help but smile tenderly at how you looked up at him like a kitten in the rain.
“Sooo, we’re doing it telekinesis style today?” He asked in a soft voice as he approached you, making you laugh a little.
“Just… gaining the courage.”
“I see…” He kneeled in front of you on the floor so the height difference wasn’t as noticeable, and took your hands in his, resting his chin on your knees. “And how long have you been trying to gain the courage for?”
“…a while.”
“So I’ve noticed.” A couple of gentle pecks landed on your thighs before he continued. “What’s the matter, schat?”
“Nothing, I just…” You sighed. You hated admitting your weaknesses. “I’m not particularly fond of needles. So I gotta, like, prepare myself mentally first.”
“Oh… That’s okay.” His soft, thick fingers massaged your thighs. “You could’ve asked for help, you know? I would’ve gladly helped.”
“I know. I just always thought it was something I had to do on my own, but maybe I do need you.” You admitted in a small voice.
“And I’m here, baby. You don’t have to do this alone. It’s okay to ask for help.”
Before you could register anything, Joost’s hands were already moving to grab the alcohol swab from the nightstand and opening the packaging. He wiped your thigh with all the care in the world, looking up at you for approval.
“Like this?” When you nodded in response, a playful cocky smile crossed his lips. “See? I know how to do it.” He got rid of the used swab, eyeing the other items before meeting your gaze again. “Okay, now what?”
You giggled at his clueless expression and then pointed to the source of your stress, feeling a bit more at ease now that Joost was with you.
“Now I’m gonna need that and the vial.”
Joost gave you the supplies, watching how you got everything ready, passing the testosterone to the syringe with practiced hands. Once that was done, you held the needle about an inch from your skin, eyes fixed on it as you tried to convince your brain to collaborate.
“Let’s go, baby, you can do it. I’m here with you.” Joost watched your face, the way your eyebrows furrowed in concentration and distress, the way your lips parted to let out quick breaths. He saw hesitation written all over your features. “You want me to do it?”
That made you leave your bubble of anxiety for a second.
“You know how to do it?”
“Not really, but I can learn.” He offered a reassuring smile, taking the syringe from you. “So, show me.”
You had to fight a smile of your own - a stupid little one that threatened to form - so you could illustrate everything properly. But it was no use. A huge, adoring grin accompanied your detailed explanation. You were so in love with that man.
After listening to what you had to say, Joost gently stretched the skin of your thigh flat with one hand and held the needle with the other, observing your reaction to see if he was doing everything right and if that was the correct spot.
“Want me to do it quickly or slowly?” He asked after having the confirmation. “I feel like I’ll miss if I do it quick. I don’t wanna hurt you.”
“If you do it slow that’s way more painful. Plus, I just wanna get this over with. But you won’t miss, baby, don’t worry.”
“You sure?”
“I’m sure.”
“Okay… You just relax, schatje, it will be very quick and then it’s over. Don’t look and don’t focus too much on it, alright? Just listen to my voice.”
“Mhm…” You agreed weakly, suddenly finding the ceiling very interesting.
“On the count of three. One… two… three!” He jabbed the needle into your muscle; the action earning just the tiniest hiss from you. “Shhh shhh I’m here. The hardest part is done.” Without rushing things, Joost slowly pushed the plunger in. “And you’re being so good for me. You’re so brave. My brave boy.”
Despite what Joost had told you, you looked down. It wasn’t on purpose. Your head had moved on its own accord; curiosity getting the best of you. Fortunately, his tattooed fingers covered the intrusion to your skin, stopping you from seeing something that would definitely make you uncomfortable. Instead, your eyes focused on your boyfriend’s face. The concentration on it was honestly adorable. It almost seemed like he was holding his breath just so he wouldn’t accidentally move and hurt you. He finally let it out once the plunger was pushed all the way down.
“Aaaand testosterone in.” He announced with a silly deep voice, capable of making sport commentators jealous; and making it really damn hard for you not to move with the chuckle that escaped you.
With renewed worry, he took the needle out as steady as he could, careful not to be too rough. As soon as the metal tip was visible, he looked at you with a proud smile.
“Done!” He set the syringe on the nightstand and got up from the floor, grabbing your face and kissing you all over. “I’m so proud of you! You didn’t even flinch! And thank God.” A giggle escaped him, but it was quickly interrupted when he noticed a small drop of blood on your thigh. “Fuck, is bleeding normal? Please tell me it’s normal. I knew I shouldn’t have done it quickly!”
“Joost, it’s normal, don’t worry!” You laughed while grabbing a cotton ball and gently pressed it against the spot. “It was only a tiny little bit, see? Don’t freak out.”
“Oh… I knew that, I’m a professional.” He grinned sheepishly, sitting on the bed, next to you. “It went well then, right?”
“Yes. It usually does, it’s just the needle to skin contact that makes me nervous.” You sighed, frustrated with the situation. “I really gotta get over this stupid fear.”
“It’s not stupid, baby.” His hand moved to your thigh, thumb rubbing it affectionately. “Feeling scared is a normal thing. Everyone is scared of something. Don’t put that much pressure on yourself.”
“I know, but sometimes I can’t help but feel like… this makes me less of a man, you know? That… being scared of needles is not very manly. I know it’s not like that! But I can’t seem to convince the deepest part of my brain.”
“Why would being scared of needles make you less of a man, huh? Every man is scared of something, no matter what they might say. It’s part of being a person. Being scared doesn’t make you less manly, it just makes you human.” Joost took your face in his hands, making you look at him. “Besides, every man worries about being ‘man enough’ - whatever that means - at a certain point in their lives. Some just stop giving a fuck about it eventually. That’s what I did. And it feels damn good not to worry about what others think of you. You know who you are, don’t you? Well, that’s all that matters.”
“I-I don’t even know what to say-“
“You don’t need to say anything, baby. It’s the truth. And even if you doubt it, I know you’re a man. My man. My handsome boyfriend.” His lips met yours in a series of tender pecks. “And I love you.”
“I love you too, Joost.”
Maybe you were still incredibly afraid of needles, but at least every time you were in your boyfriend’s arms, you felt like the most powerful man on Earth.
————————————
PS: The changes part didn’t fit into this little fic, but it’s so sweet! And Joostie would totally shower reader in compliments, noticing the changes in his voice and the face structure and how much hairier he’s getting… everything <3
A simple video of Joost wiping blood from his lip got me thinking about vamp!Joost yet again, so have some thoughts, I guess
Vamp!Joost sinking his fangs into your neck for the first time, taking more blood than what he had originally planned, but you don’t seem to mind all that much, just letting out weak sounds as he drinks from you. Him kissing your neck between sucking, smearing blood all over it and his mouth. After he’s satisfied, he pulls away, lips swollen and red. “Oops, hope you can handle some blood~”, he says as he licks his lips, looking every bit like the cocky bastard he is, huge grin on his face. And you can only nod dumbly because of how lightheaded you feel and how hot he looks as he slowly wipes some more with his thumb, looking at the mess on his finger with furrowed brows and parted lips before he’s showing his fangs again in a dangerous smirk
A simple video of Joost wiping blood from his lip got me thinking about vamp!Joost yet again, so have some thoughts, I guess
Vamp!Joost sinking his fangs into your neck for the first time, taking more blood than what he had originally planned, but you don’t seem to mind all that much, just letting out weak sounds as he drinks from you. Him kissing your neck between sucking, smearing blood all over it and his mouth. After he’s satisfied, he pulls away, lips swollen and red. “Oops, hope you can handle some blood~”, he says as he licks his lips, looking every bit like the cocky bastard he is, huge grin on his face. And you can only nod dumbly because of how lightheaded you feel and how hot he looks as he slowly wipes some more with his thumb, looking at the mess on his finger with furrowed brows and parted lips before he’s showing his fangs again in a dangerous smirk
OMG?? 🤭 literally started jumping for joy I can't wait
FEED ME!!! FEED MEEE!!!!
-🪶
I was planning to write more last night and answer this ask with a better sneak peek, but I was eepy, so have a random part of what I wrote yesterday :D