OMG BEEN THINKING ABT THIS SINCE I RECENTLY HIT 4 MONTHS ON TESTOSTERONE #flex
joost helping transmasc reader with his t shots :( reader is scared of needles so joost helps him with them, comforting him and talking him through it. And once reader gets further on t, joost commenting and complimenting reader on the changes, telling him how proud he is of him awwww :(
When he said "I don't understand trans hate" he meant it PERSONALLY bc he adores and worships his AWESOME HANDSOME COOL TRANSGENDER BOYFRIEND and he doesn't understand why people can hate something as beautiful as that!!!! GAH!! Happy pride btw I love being gay and transgender LOLLL
-🪶
First of all, CONGRATS 🙌🏻
Second of all, that’s such a cute idea! Allow me to write a little smth 🤭 Happy Prideee 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️
JUST MAKES YOU HUMAN
Joost x transmasc!reader
Description: Joost helps you with your t-shot and reassures you
Warnings: Mention of needles (duh), tiny little bit of blood (blink and you’ll miss it), dysphoria and hurt/comfort
Word count: 1.7k
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A few good minutes had passed since your gaze had first focused on your nightstand. You couldn’t look away, but you also couldn’t convince your body to move. So you just stared. It was always like this. Needle and testosterone ready to use, yet untouched for several minutes after they had been placed there. Not because you didn’t want to do your shot - God, that was the highlight of your week! - but because you were scared. Scared of that sharp, metal thing that had to pierce your skin to make you feel like yourself. It was so unfair that one of the greatest joys in your transition was also something that filled you with an awful sense of anxiety.
Fortunately, you had other joys in your life that didn’t involve those stressful feelings and that helped you deal with them... And said joy was currently turning the key in the lock of your shared apartment and stepping inside, greeting you in an unmistakable cheerful voice.
“Babyyy, I’m hooome!”
Soon, the door to the bedroom was being opened and your eyes were finally leaving the items to meet your boyfriend’s. His sweet expression made you forgot about any fear you had for a moment.
“Hallo!” He beamed, eyebrows raising as he found you sitting in bed in your boxers, legs dangling from the edge of it, and apparently just staring off into the distance. He walked up to you, taking your face in his hands and gently kissing your lips.
“Hi~” You answered with a smitten look after the kiss.
“Hi, handsome~” Joost matched your expression, thumbs rubbing your cheeks affectionately. “Waiting for me in bed already?”
You let out a small chuckle. “I was about to do my t-shot, actually.”
“Oh, you go ahead then. I’ll give you some privacy while I go change.” He kissed your cheek, letting his fingers slide down your arm and intertwine with yours before reluctantly pulling away.
Truth was, you kinda didn’t want Joost to leave. Now that he was home, you wanted him by your side while you administered the inevitable injection, comforting you throughout the whole process; but in a matter of seconds he had already disappeared into the bathroom.
That’s okay. You could do this alone, right? You always did. It was no big deal. You just had to suck it up and do it. Yup.
Yet, when you realized, another 10 minutes had passed and Joost was coming out of the bathroom, fully dressed, and being met with the sight of his boyfriend in the exact same position he was in when Joost got home. The Dutch man couldn’t help but smile tenderly at how you looked up at him like a kitten in the rain.
“Sooo, we’re doing it telekinesis style today?” He asked in a soft voice as he approached you, making you laugh a little.
“Just… gaining the courage.”
“I see…” He kneeled in front of you on the floor so the height difference wasn’t as noticeable, and took your hands in his, resting his chin on your knees. “And how long have you been trying to gain the courage for?”
“…a while.”
“So I’ve noticed.” A couple of gentle pecks landed on your thighs before he continued. “What’s the matter, schat?”
“Nothing, I just…” You sighed. You hated admitting your weaknesses. “I’m not particularly fond of needles. So I gotta, like, prepare myself mentally first.”
“Oh… That’s okay.” His soft, thick fingers massaged your thighs. “You could’ve asked for help, you know? I would’ve gladly helped.”
“I know. I just always thought it was something I had to do on my own, but maybe I do need you.” You admitted in a small voice.
“And I’m here, baby. You don’t have to do this alone. It’s okay to ask for help.”
Before you could register anything, Joost’s hands were already moving to grab the alcohol swab from the nightstand and opening the packaging. He wiped your thigh with all the care in the world, looking up at you for approval.
“Like this?” When you nodded in response, a playful cocky smile crossed his lips. “See? I know how to do it.” He got rid of the used swab, eyeing the other items before meeting your gaze again. “Okay, now what?”
You giggled at his clueless expression and then pointed to the source of your stress, feeling a bit more at ease now that Joost was with you.
“Now I’m gonna need that and the vial.”
Joost gave you the supplies, watching how you got everything ready, passing the testosterone to the syringe with practiced hands. Once that was done, you held the needle about an inch from your skin, eyes fixed on it as you tried to convince your brain to collaborate.
“Let’s go, baby, you can do it. I’m here with you.” Joost watched your face, the way your eyebrows furrowed in concentration and distress, the way your lips parted to let out quick breaths. He saw hesitation written all over your features. “You want me to do it?”
That made you leave your bubble of anxiety for a second.
“You know how to do it?”
“Not really, but I can learn.” He offered a reassuring smile, taking the syringe from you. “So, show me.”
You had to fight a smile of your own - a stupid little one that threatened to form - so you could illustrate everything properly. But it was no use. A huge, adoring grin accompanied your detailed explanation. You were so in love with that man.
After listening to what you had to say, Joost gently stretched the skin of your thigh flat with one hand and held the needle with the other, observing your reaction to see if he was doing everything right and if that was the correct spot.
“Want me to do it quickly or slowly?” He asked after having the confirmation. “I feel like I’ll miss if I do it quick. I don’t wanna hurt you.”
“If you do it slow that’s way more painful. Plus, I just wanna get this over with. But you won’t miss, baby, don’t worry.”
“You sure?”
“I’m sure.”
“Okay… You just relax, schatje, it will be very quick and then it’s over. Don’t look and don’t focus too much on it, alright? Just listen to my voice.”
“Mhm…” You agreed weakly, suddenly finding the ceiling very interesting.
“On the count of three. One… two… three!” He jabbed the needle into your muscle; the action earning just the tiniest hiss from you. “Shhh shhh I’m here. The hardest part is done.” Without rushing things, Joost slowly pushed the plunger in. “And you’re being so good for me. You’re so brave. My brave boy.”
Despite what Joost had told you, you looked down. It wasn’t on purpose. Your head had moved on its own accord; curiosity getting the best of you. Fortunately, his tattooed fingers covered the intrusion to your skin, stopping you from seeing something that would definitely make you uncomfortable. Instead, your eyes focused on your boyfriend’s face. The concentration on it was honestly adorable. It almost seemed like he was holding his breath just so he wouldn’t accidentally move and hurt you. He finally let it out once the plunger was pushed all the way down.
“Aaaand testosterone in.” He announced with a silly deep voice, capable of making sport commentators jealous; and making it really damn hard for you not to move with the chuckle that escaped you.
With renewed worry, he took the needle out as steady as he could, careful not to be too rough. As soon as the metal tip was visible, he looked at you with a proud smile.
“Done!” He set the syringe on the nightstand and got up from the floor, grabbing your face and kissing you all over. “I’m so proud of you! You didn’t even flinch! And thank God.” A giggle escaped him, but it was quickly interrupted when he noticed a small drop of blood on your thigh. “Fuck, is bleeding normal? Please tell me it’s normal. I knew I shouldn’t have done it quickly!”
“Joost, it’s normal, don’t worry!” You laughed while grabbing a cotton ball and gently pressed it against the spot. “It was only a tiny little bit, see? Don’t freak out.”
“Oh… I knew that, I’m a professional.” He grinned sheepishly, sitting on the bed, next to you. “It went well then, right?”
“Yes. It usually does, it’s just the needle to skin contact that makes me nervous.” You sighed, frustrated with the situation. “I really gotta get over this stupid fear.”
“It’s not stupid, baby.” His hand moved to your thigh, thumb rubbing it affectionately. “Feeling scared is a normal thing. Everyone is scared of something. Don’t put that much pressure on yourself.”
“I know, but sometimes I can’t help but feel like… this makes me less of a man, you know? That… being scared of needles is not very manly. I know it’s not like that! But I can’t seem to convince the deepest part of my brain.”
“Why would being scared of needles make you less of a man, huh? Every man is scared of something, no matter what they might say. It’s part of being a person. Being scared doesn’t make you less manly, it just makes you human.” Joost took your face in his hands, making you look at him. “Besides, every man worries about being ‘man enough’ - whatever that means - at a certain point in their lives. Some just stop giving a fuck about it eventually. That’s what I did. And it feels damn good not to worry about what others think of you. You know who you are, don’t you? Well, that’s all that matters.”
“I-I don’t even know what to say-“
“You don’t need to say anything, baby. It’s the truth. And even if you doubt it, I know you’re a man. My man. My handsome boyfriend.” His lips met yours in a series of tender pecks. “And I love you.”
“I love you too, Joost.”
Maybe you were still incredibly afraid of needles, but at least every time you were in your boyfriend’s arms, you felt like the most powerful man on Earth.
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PS: The changes part didn’t fit into this little fic, but it’s so sweet! And Joostie would totally shower reader in compliments, noticing the changes in his voice and the face structure and how much hairier he’s getting… everything <3
Joost would really love to buy you sexy lingerie wherever he travels, his cock would throb from just the thought of you in it.... 😵💫😵💫
ooo yes yes yes yes !! i fear he would love it even more to just watch you fuck yourself while wearing it.. i wonder if he would love strip teases too hehe..
