What if?
We may disagree on a lot of things, but the one common thread that we share is that we want good things for our lives. Our understanding of what is 'good' may change over time, because of course it would. What we think is good at age 4 is different from what we think is good at a much older age. The challenging part about navigating life is that things get in the way. We work toward a goal? There is ALWAYS opposition What we thought would be permanent? Might be fleeting. WIthout making an exhaustive list, I think you get the point. When optimism is met with persistent opposition and tension, holding on to optimism can become increasingly difficult. Maintaining optimism in the face of expectations that were unmet is one of those skills in life that I find highly admirable. However, sometimes continued unmet expectation can create deep wounds. This is said with as much grace as possible. We are all human and I believe many of us are doing the best we can. But the voice of disappointment and hurt can speak much more loudly than anything else. And sometimes in the face of things that are good, we may not even be sure how to handle it. We may even say no to that opportunity, or even think that its too good to be true. We might respond out of a desire to protect ourselves and avoid a potential letdown.
BUT What if what feels like self preservation is actually self sabotage? We shouldn't use past letdowns and hurt as an excuse to never try. Self preservation might be saving us from discomfort, but it goes both ways because it could also be holding us back. That's the self sabotaging nature of it because it is extremely humbling to know that sometimes we are the ones that hold ourselves back. Self preservation doesn't rebuild confidence, or move the needle forward in a meaningful way. Change and momentary discomfort often go hand in hand. Change is the tool often used in our lives to grow us. Change grows us - discomfort stretches us. Remember how I said that we all deep down want good things for our lives? Well, when we've been disappointed enough times and go into self-preservation mode, we can unknowingly shift from wanting good things for our lives to being okay with what is 'good enough.' Especially if what is good stretches us, and what is 'good enough' doesn't require much of us. I may not know your story, but my hope is that you and I both continue to not only want the best for our lives, but let our actions reflect that, through the good and even through the difficulties.
