Have you ever been in the shower and looked down at your disappointment of a body and then just plummet into a frenzied, sob-swelling anxiety attack of shear self loathing and despair? Then the loathing takes root and coils around your shortcomings in your career, your social life, your finances? You think about how your family is falling apart and there is overwhelming poverty and real pain and suffering in the world yet you can't stop crying because your body looks like it was constructed out of pizza dough. This just worsens the deep lack of emotion, of sincere joy, of hopelessness, that 10 years later the "better" everyone told you would manifest itself has yet to appear? You're covered in the suffocating realization that the only hint of emotion you can now experience is pain or hate or depression, and that you've finally found a man who treated you like a princess and you can't, despite every effort get yourself to love and cherish and give to him what he has earned and deserve? Cause you're just a chubby sobbing idiot in the shower.
I broke up with my boyfriend today, seemingly out of the blue for him, cause he is unable to see the whirlwind of chaos and depression enveloping my thoughts without end. It was in an attempt not to hurt him, but I still ended up hurting him.
jacobvanloon
gummygunk
baratheonpilled
jbbartram-illu
janainaart
titsay
stormborns
izzy806
turnnoffyourmind
