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@juliaxypoesie
“I thought, lying there, that I might love him for the rest of my life. We did love each other—maybe we never said it, and maybe love was never something we were in, but it was something I felt. I loved him, and I thought, maybe I will never see him again, and I’ll be stuck missing him, and isn’t that so terrible.”
— John Green, Turtles All The Way Down
“You kiss me with your mouth wide open like you’re not afraid of swallowing poison. I taste the good and bad in you and want them both. We call this bravery.”
— Anita Ofokansi, Literary Sexts
“We’ll survive, you and I.”
— F. Scott Fitzgerald
I don’t know how to function rn. After losing my mom. Everything that happened between us is out of mind but still there. I can’t even blame her. Trauma is hard and I know she was traumatized and brought it out on me. But that’s in the past. We were just repairing the trauma though. We were just getting better. And now she’s gone. I’ll never have another Christmas or Thanksgiving where she would ask what I’m thankful for. I never said her. I never said I’m thankful for you mommy. It feels pointless to be alive rn. Pointless to wanna live in a world where my mom isn’t here. Pointless to get married young since she’s not here anymore. I just was talking to her about getting married young and I was thinking maybe I should for you to be able to see it. I haven’t done anything with my life yet. I graduated from high school. That’s it. I was so close to getting a promotion at work. I just wanted her to be proud of me. But we never talked. I just figured it needed time and I needed time. But I guess time has never been in my favor. I know she was proud of me and I know she loves me so much. To the end of her life she loves me still. She’ll never stop. But I just wanted her to know I loved her. Even though I only communicated so often. It hurts so bad.
“Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go.”
― Jamie Anderson
Sanna Wani, “Who is the Sun, Asking for Sleep?”, My Grief, the Sun // Brenna Twohy, A Coworker Asks Me If I Am Sad, Still
“The person you will be in 5 years is based on the books you read and the people you surround yourself with today.”
— Unknown
“Sometimes I find that music is so much more attractive than love. I don’t know… It’s like some kind of euphoria, that love can’t bring to you.”
— Florence Welch
“One of the hardest lessons in life is letting go. Whether it’s guilt, love, anger, loss or betrayal, change is never easy. We fight to hold on and we fight to let go.”
— Unknown
“You can’t fix me. Let me have my bad days.”
— Dayna Walls-Cochran
“I think I might always be in some kind of love with you.”
— F. Cabanes
I don’t know if I’ll ever love again
If I’ll ever be brave enough to give someone my heart again
I don’t even know if someone deserves the kind of love I give
Because everytime i love it ends the same way
They start to pull themselves back, talk to me less, and slowly lose interest in me
And I have to be the one to leave because they would never admit that they lost their love for me
So in the end I was the one who broke their heart
While they completely ignore how much their absence killed me the months they have still been in my life.
I know they’ll never understand hike I moved on that quick
But let’s be honest, as soon as I felt you pulling away I removed my heart from you I hilft that wall back up until I had enough and was able to leave you on your own
I knew falling in love again was going to hurt,
But I didn’t think it would hurt this bad.
I didn’t knew that everything I do
Because I learned it in passed relationships is wrong to you
I know I’m a shitty girlfriend
I know I keep doing everything wrong
I know that I doubt you way do much
I know that you deserve better
And I do know that I ruin your life for no reason
That I get mad when I miss you
That I am really hard to handle
But please promise me you won’t leave me
I don’t know what I’d do without you
What I would be capable of doing is you’d left me
“I don’t want to live like this but I don’t want to die.”
— Vampire Weekend, Finger Back
“The moment I saw her, a part of me walked out of my body and wrapped itself around her. And there it still remains.”
— Arundhati Roy, The Ministry of Utmost Happiness
“The thing you are most afraid to write. Write that.”
— Nayyirah Waheed
