writing in the year twenty twenty one

Julia Lipscomb writes, edits, and takes photos in a new lo-fi blog.

[juliazine]

I was like everyone else. We all hoped the storm would knock things over, fuck things up bad enough but not too much. We hoped the damage was bad enough to cancel work the next morning but not so bad that we couldn’t go to brunch instead.

quote by narrator Candace in a passage in Severance by Ling Ma

[juliazine]

Pop-up book store in NYC subway station

I was emerging from the L train platform when I ran across a pop-up book store located inside Union Square station. There were contemporary books that I recognized, some that I've read or that I'm currently reading. Ulli Beutter Cohen created the Subway Book Review store and exhibit and write the book, Between the Lines: Stories from the Underground, which she said took 7 years to write and interview all the subjects (buy a copy here or stop by the shop). You can also buy a book from Reads for Rikers, and the book will be donated to libraries at Rikers Island. Take a pause next time you're on the subway and check it out. The literary store closes Dec. 12.

[juliazine]

My zines circa 2006

Once I had been publishing my zine for a couple years, my interests evolved. I didn’t want to write about politics all the time. I was getting into music.  I wanted to see live shows. (When you begin to lose interest in the topic of your zine, you can change it! There’s nobody telling you that you can’t).

Downtown Spokane was experiencing a renaissance of independent music. I wanted to be at the center.

It was 2006. Verizon launched the 3G network in 2002. Steve Jobs didn’t release the iPhone until 2007, but most people were buying their first cell phones. These were Nokias or Blackberrys. I didn’t have a cell phone, but I didn’t need one. When I arrived in downtown Spokane and needed to confirm an appointment to interview an artist, I used the guest phone at the Davenport.

The guest phone was a sleek, jet black and classic rotary-designed telephone in the main lobby of the Davenport. It was available for guests of the five star hotel. I think I discovered that it was able to call out for free when I asked to use it to call a family member. I only got caught once, but that was when I had pink hair and wore Hot Topic wrist sleeves. It’s not there anymore. I don’t know if it’s because more people have mobile phones now or if was to curb punk kids trying to take advantage of it.

When creating a distribution strategy for a zine, it’s not unlike the publishing process—you work with what you got.

[juliazine]

My zines circa 2004

The Labyrinthian was my first zine (File the zine under Politics/DIY). I distributed it at the local food co-op in Republic, WA. When you first start a zine, you have to work with whatever and any supplies you have; that is one reason why every zine is unique to its owner. I used Microsoft Publisher on my family-shared computer to create The Labyrinthian.

[juliazine]

Book Review: Where the Crawdads Sing

Where The Crawdads Sing by Delia Owens is an exquisite survivalist story set in North Carolina about a very young girl and how she forges strong connections with a few people who matter more than her biological family who abandoned her. I was recommend the book by my coworkers in April 2020 after we read Bad Blood: Secrets and Lies in a a Silicon Valley Startup, the story about Elizabeth Holmes, by John Carreyou. I was warned that Where the Crawdads Sing was beautiful but sad. I wasn’t ready for a sad book at the start of the pandemic, so I waited to read it until the next time I went home and could read it in nature.

The evergreen pine trees of Eastern Washington is a landscape that looks different from the marshes off the North Carolina coast, but I discovered a newfound appreciation for the natural landscape surrounding my hometown while reading about Kya taking solace in feeding the galls and studying hawk feathers. Where the Crawdads Sing was perfect to read while I was taking a vacation in the wilderness; while I was reading the progression of the murder trial, I was sitting outside on a mountain and the birds and the wind orchestrated the soundtrack.

The romance felt a little sappy at times but it was fun! There’s a fair balance of fiction writing with other forms — poetry and scientific writing — that weave together to celebrate the wonder of the outdoors.

[juliazine]

Autumn Equinox

35mm Fuji Velvia

[juliazine]

What’s a publication that changed you?

I was 17 years old when I found an issue of Los Angeles Valley Beat in downtown Los Angeles. It was the “Punk Issue.” I was on a family vacation, looking for ways to escape traditions and trying to become more independent. It was when I started getting into indie pop/indie punk bands and finding new contemporary music on MySpace. Not to date myself, but Myspace had been the easiest way to find new music when I was living and attending school in a small, rural town with a population of under one thousand residents.

Its was the last day of vacation in LA when I found the alternative newspaper, and I was feeling sad about going home. On the way to Hollywood Burbank Airport, my parents stopped for gas and refreshments before returning the rental car. I can’t remember where exactly I found the stack of Valley Beat but it was some place --- a diner or a gas station --- where you wouldn’t otherwise expect to find a guide on “real punk.”

One of the highlights of the newspaper was a column, “Making the Scene: Rock Critics are artists, too... just ask them” by Ron Garmon. The article covered the role of the journalist in music communities and the impact that famous “rock critics” like Lester Bangs and Greil Marcus had left. Garmon was critical of Bangs for “needing the Scene so much he never recognized it needed him far more” and argues this addiction feeds into the commodification of punk. The column ends with a call to action:

In an era of spunkless, punk, the critic’s first duty is to dynamite the house that Lester built.

To be honest, I wanted more out of the article. I thought it was too short. I read and reread the article hundreds of times that year, even cutting it out and pasting it in my journal. (Good thing I did because that preserved the article for me to share it with you today). Every sentence carried enormous weight; it read like poetry to me.

I’m not sure what Garmon meant by setting fire to Lester’s legacy on music criticism, and I’d love to ask him. For me, as a young women writer interested in  music, it encouraged me to get on a different beat. If an editor didn’t like a piece I wrote, I’d submit it to a different editor or self-publish it.

By taking back control of the publishing and business of your writing, it makes it more difficult for the “scene” to dictate what you write and publish --- and that’s punk.

[juliazine]

One Year

I messed up the seams in the upper right corner so I hid it with a flower. I couldn’t understand what the woman’s face was saying in the original portrait, but now she wears a mask like most everyone else anyways. Original photo: Cleo by Edward Canby

[juliazine]

Dress for the way you feel.

When I collage, I look for bright colors, bold prints, textured fabrics, creatively framed portraits, and mixed print layers. This image is from an RVCA catalog and it caught my attention because of the decayed walls in the background, the bold and contrasting colors, and the confidence that the woman shows in a relaxed standing pose. I like to collect fabrics and images that I like, but I usually don’t get a sense of how they can coordinate together until I toss them in a pile and sort through them. 

I heard recently someone say “Dress for the way you want to feel” and I think about that beyond artmaking to every time I put together my own outfits for the day. It’s not about dressing for success or the job you want. Your job will stay your job. Dress for the way you want to feel.

Content updated weekly @sewingonpaper 

[juliazine]

today while i was archiving

An essay in quotations

Originally published in my today while i was archiving zine. I started collected quotes from files, artifacts and articles that were interesting then sewed them together in a new way. This is a lightly edited version of the original.

- Julia Lipscomb

“I can’t describe the feeling so I’m not going to describe the feeling.”

“No news is good news.”

“Some kids nowadays, it doesn’t matter their upbringing, but they always have to be doing something. That’s why I think athletics is great for a person, keeps them active.”

“I think the kid’s outta trouble.”

“NEXT WINDOW PLEASE.”

“The theoretical concept of zero impact regardless of cost may be an amusing or challenging cause for idealistic amateurs.”

“If the twenty-first century didn’t exist, it would be necessary to invent it.”

“We’re living while we’re singing, so I guess that’s a step in the right direction.”

I wrote “No newspaper clippings” in cursive 500 times. I didn’t even know I could still write in cursive.

“Fellow down here says he can permanently solve the illegal immigration problem.. Just declare every new illegal immigrant legal.”

“Omniscience stops at 21.”

“Comment.”

“Things ebb and flow, I believe.”

Editors of nineteenth century alternative publications in Spokane wrote with poison pens and called their rags “sheets.”

“It’s time to replace tongues of commerce, with those of passion.”

“It does not tarnish one’s image or dirty one’s hands to seek financial support from business. Maybe the rarefied atmosphere of a wealthy patron’s drawing room is more attractive to some museum development directors, but those days are fast fading.”

“Your response needed before February 15. WRITE TODAY.”

“Give what you have and what is in possession of other members of your family and GIVE IT NOW.”

“These menus are the financial responsibility of your waiter.”

“You’re driving backwards right now.”

“In a little hotel room on Monroe and Lincoln, a man fell asleep while smoking a cigar and lit his bed on fire.”

“There should be two beds, if the room is to be occupied by two persons. Two single beds take up little more room than one full sized bed and the advantage gained in comfort and healthfulness are great.”

“It sounds like you’ve fallen in love with the city?”

“Kisses are a better fate than wisdom.”

“No more words.”

“Write a poem!”

“I am somewhat of a bullshitter myself but occasionally I like to listen to a professional.”

“Write your stores about your life as a child. I am ready for incorporating them into my stories.”

“It’s all about new canvasses, without painting over the previous works of art failures.”

[juliazine]

Living in Television Static

I.

Migraines can make you forget to speak.

Sometimes it is fine to not speak when you need to listen or a situation happens where it’s better to be quiet, but the flip side is it looks like you are silent. Silence means not speaking in defense of your position or not speaking out against an injustice. When you are silent, it looks like you are seething, but sometimes things are better left unsaid or leaving space for someone else to talk.

To seethe means to churn and foam as a result of being boiled, like water simmering. The definition of the word is a metaphor. How else can you describe a verb that contains a full volume of undeciphered emotions such as quiet resentment, rage, and despair swirling around with inappropriate contempt towards others than with water trapped inside a crystalline glass container? There is one way to release the contaminated liquid and that is by dropping it. I have found that there is nothing wrong with seething. The expression of boiling hot liquid guides us like a beacon in the right direction.

We always think the new year will make things better but we’re really waiting for the right moment to break the glass.

II.

We stopped into the cafe for coffee and brunch. Our group of seven people crammed into a booth. I was a nervous wreck. I didn’t know anyone else besides my friend Rebecca, though we had been drinking with the entire group the night before. Rebecca was talking to everyone. She complimented my hair though I felt insecure about not having time to style it. My makeup had washed away and I felt like my mouth was stuck in one expression, motionless, and I was afraid I looked contempt. I felt a brain fog overcome me and it was difficult to meet anyone’s gaze to engage in conversation. My eyes wandered from the blue vinyl lining of the booth to the window. I gazed at the overcast clouds that highlighted the short green trees across the street, the warehouse with multicolored graffiti names, and the stylish layers of the people who passed by the cafe. Across from our booth was the bar with a television playing the Giants game. I admired how Rebecca was talking to everyone even when all of us was hungover. Rebecca turned to me, her face beaming with joy, and said, “This the best place I’ve ever been.”

I had a headache that was not disappearing with the black coffee I ordered. I stared down the cup and it was emptied, with a chestnut colored circle lining the bottom. I didn’t have anything to say, but I wished I had enjoyed the place the same way.

III.

The first show I watched in quarantine was GLOW on Netflix. One of the many things that I loved about the show GLOW is that the characters depict real health issues that women experience. There’s one part (this isn’t necessarily a spoiler as I will make it as general as possible) when a character has a migraine on her honeymoon. I feel like the story wanted you to think that she was pregnant because she was with somebody, but she wasn’t. She had to cancel her plans with her husband because being in the car made her sick. All that she could do was lay in bed with an eye mask. Then the narrative showed her husband’s expressions, and he was confused initially, but he approached the health event with gentle care and empathy even through the ambiguity of not understanding the pain himself.

When I have a migraine, my head feels fuzzy. I’m not able to talk as well. My reaction time slows, and all I can do is disappear and confine myself to my room. I try to wash my face or apply makeup to carry out my day, but my facial expressions disappear.

Sometimes the migraine comes from stress. Sometimes from a hangover. And sometimes there is no reason. I start living in television static.

[juliazine]

My grandma told me once that before you write you must live through a lot of experiences. That’s how you know what to write about.

1.

2.

3.

This is my grandma with her friends on the subway in New York City in 1973. In the first photo, she’s the one looking at the camera. We’re not from here, but she was one of the first to visit and experience the city in our family. I knew she wrote about it too.

[juliazine]

Watch it again

I sat in the back of the literary seminar with my 800 page copy of Anna Karenina. For my essay, I was studying a minor character, Kitty Shcherbastky, and her inner turmoil before getting married. The professor’s readings were engaging and illustrative however I found he commonly ignored the woman’s perspective on literature.

The door pushed open slowly. and it was one of my friends who also sits in the back row. 

I started dating this girl, he shared, and I feel like that part in 500 Days of Summer when Joseph Gordon-Levitt is skipping across town and hugging strangers, while Hall & Oates is playing.

That’s so cute I said. It did sound cute. I had felt that way before and I didn’t want to criticize my friend’s feelings, but I didn’t know we were taking that scene out of context and he probably didn’t either.

You haven’t seen that movie?

No, I haven’t yet. Is it good?

It’s one of the best movies of all time.

That’s cool, I said.

Since the movie was released, I noticed that a number of guys loved that movie and talk empathically of the lead character. I wonder how much of this was the result of the sexist culture of that time period that centers the perspective of the man in a romantic relationship. 

A time when low-budget “indie” films were popular but there was still little diversity in them.

When I watched the movie in full, I was surprised I got a different impression than what I imagined from talking to people about it. It was more of a gender reversed Fatal Attraction than romantic comedy. His friends referred to his crush as a dream girl, a warning he didn’t heed.

Nearly ten years later that a fan tweeted that he “still haven’t forgiven Zooey Deschanel for what she did to Joseph Gordon-Levitt in (500) Days of Summer.” JGL himself replied, “Watch it again.”

Summer Finn, like Kitty, wanted to choose who she marries and reclaim the rest of her life.

[juliazine]

Disclaimer

Sometimes going into work short on time, I stop into a CVS for a quick morning snack. There are three aisles where the granola bars are shelved, and the type and brand vary every time I walk in there. I have a nut allergy, so I take a minute to examine the nutrition label before selecting one to purchase. I know Cliff Bars are a reliable brand. I know what type doesn’t contain nuts, like “Chocolate Chip,” “Mint Chocolate Chip,” or “Chocolate Coconut Chip.” I’m not sure how healthy these really are for me, but I only need something to start my day. Every product will say something like this ALLERGY STATEMENT: CONTAINS [ALLERGEN]. MAY CONTAIN TRACES OF MILK, WHEAT, AND TREE NUTS.”

For my own personal allergy, I’ve come to learn that “may contain” is a legal disclaimer. The allergy statement will state exactly what it contains and that’s all I need to know. I can read the full list of ingredients too. If I find a bar that doesn’t contain my allergen, they are additionally informing me that they assume no liability for what I eat. So what? I’ve found this “may contain” on every food product. What does “may contain” contain?

When you start writing, it is common to feel unnerved by hearing the persistence of the question What are you writing? The question may appear more often cynically from your own apprehension. What would you call this?

I have come to learn that there is only one time when you can define your writing and that is when you have finished writing. Until then, it can feel paralyzing. Sometimes it helps to have a disclaimer.

“This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, businesses, companies, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.”

I take the first bite of my Cliff Bar. Chocolate chip, without allergens. Later that night I indulged in my mom’s holiday sugar cookies (pictured) that arrived in the mail and sit down to write.

After the disclaimer, the writer is free to write.

15.01.21

Insta: SewingonPaper

[juliazine]

Move the needle

I stopped collaging for a while because I thought my sewing machine was in need of repair and I felt too stressed to figure out what that meant.

Shortly after the new year, I sat down to sew a border for an image I had found from an RVCA catalog. The arrangement of art with dream catchers, wicker baskets, deer horns, and illustrations over a chestnut stained dresser reminded me of a carefully curated Airbnb room that I stayed in five years ago. I needed brown thread to match the hues in the photo and compliment the dusty rose mesh fabric that I upcycled from an old summer dress, but that required removing the upper and lower thread stools and starting over again. I’m usually a patient person but I have no patience for sewing and design. I’d rather make something, however chaotic in the process and the final result, hoping to create some beauty in the mistakes. I programed a zig zag hem pattern and started sewing again.

What resulted was a hem that was uneven. The zig zag pattern looked more like loops, and the loops appeared differently from the topside as they did underneath. Without a strong, identical sewing line, the seams are destined to come undone over time. I thought about leaving it there and embracing in its flaws. However, I knew as an archivist I didn’t want to risk a piece falling apart over time again.

Sometimes you have to read the technical instructions dozens of times to figure out what went wrong and how to address in fixing it. Sometimes nothing needs to be fixed, you just need to deal with it. Sometimes it doesn’t happen in a day and you need to go to sleep frustrated, work another week, then try again on your next day off. And then you have to sit down and complete the task.

The answer was in front of you. It seems you forgot to move the needle to an upright position before threading the lower spool in the sewing machine.

It was only one step that you missed. You forgot to move the needle.

For more writing things follow SewingonPaper

14.01.21

[juliazine]

Looking for zines to read?

1. Pin Up Doll Astrology 

Printed Feb 2020.  Fictionalized astrological profiles paired with images of pin up girls that look like their zodiac sign cut up from a Taschen art book. Small print run of <25 so please don’t sue me. Everybody steals. Every cover is unique too.

2. Speak It All The Time

Printed in the year 2015 possibly but I forgot. (Sorry the years feel hazy looking back at the last decade). Through personal creative nonfiction comics, I tell the story of living as an adult with speech problems that started in childhood.

3. Thought. Mouth.

Printed Jan 2019. Personal cretaive nonfiction zine with random collages, essays, and drawings about music, art and commerce, the kind of thoughts you may have on an evening train leaving Penn Station on Christmas Eve.

4. [REDACTED FROM THE INTERNET, AVAILABLE IN PRINT ONLY]

A fiction/humor zine printed in the year 2014 about dating and New York subway trains that got rave reviews. Happy to share that one as well if you’re interested in reading a cute dating zine.

Zines by Julia Lipscomb. Interested in a copy of a zine? Contact me.

Insta: @ mintjulips

Venmo: @ julia-lipscomb-1

[juliazine]

Must read: Such A Fun Age by Kiley Read

Absolutely mesmerizing writing and dialogue. There were some poignant scenes in the book that made me sit and think. Emira is a fantastic strong female lead!

I’ve read the backs of a lot of books, and it’s difficult to that one book you enjoy from start to finish, where you fall in love with all of the characters, the conclusion makes you think hard about the world you're in, and most of all it just feels real. That's not to say that this book didn't make me feel uncomfortable at times. It had the balls to raise some very timely questions about race and prejudices in 2020.